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Thread: Railroad spike?

  1. #1
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member mrowl's Avatar
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    Railroad spike?

    in the taint??? OUCH.

  2. #2
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member Partial Qualifier's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    Indeed

  3. #3
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member saucysoonergal's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    Kinky. Didn't know Dean was into that stuff.
    Apathetic Posse Ringleader


    What?

  4. #4
    .............. OUDoc's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    I don't know how Dean comes up with all these sayings.
    Nor do I want to know.

  5. #5
    Hillbilly Queen

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    Re: Railroad spike?

    Quote Originally Posted by OUDoc
    I don't know how Dean comes up with all these sayings.
    Nor do I want to know.
    Screw that.

    I want to know. Espcially this one.

    Spikey taint story, Dean. Spill it..

  6. #6
    .............. OUDoc's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    Quote Originally Posted by BlondeSoonerGirl
    Spikey taint story, Dean. Spill it..
    Ouch.

  7. #7
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    I was rappelling off a railroad trestle (bridge) outside of Vail, Arizona. About 120 feet or so. Anyhow, it's like a helecopter rappell. No wall to put your feet against, just a big kick off, and then you're swinging in space under the trestle. I had done it several times already that day. I thought it would be really cool to give a big-*** kick, and just throw my brake arm out and let er' rip till I was about 10 feet above the ground or so.

    Long story short, I picked up way too much speed. When I went to brake, it basically smoked my glove, burned my hand, and I landed in a sitting position alongside a lower track that ran perpendicular to the above track. At probably 25 mph or so. An old rusty spike in one of the railroad ties was loose, and sticking up maybe 3 inches or so. I hit it directly on my taint. It did not pierce the skin. However, I thought I was going to die on the spot. I couldn't breath, it felt like someone was trying to give me a hot-steel enema (it was 111 degrees out), and I was sure I had some gut material hanging out betwixt me legs. I was seeing flashes of light, and then darkness, then back and forth between the two.

    I was afraid to move, and really couldn't if I wanted to. I kinda fell over sideways, and for probably 15 minutes all I could do was moan "**** **** **** ****in' A......"

    Seriously, I've had multiple compound fractures and deep lacerations in my day. I've had enough stitches in my head to sew up a case of Honduran baseballs. I've been screwed, blued, and tattooed. But the shattering pain, the brilliant flashes of light, the utter helplessness I experienced for that 15-20 minutes was worse than anything I've done to myself.

    Of course after realizing I wasn't impaled, I went back up one more time to just get back in the saddle.

    I was bruised from my thighs to my tailbone, and couldn't pee without hurting for a week or so. I didn't even try to think about sex during this time. In fact, the first time I "did it" a week or so later I was sweating bullets. I'm thinking "ol' Gus might explode or something - or this chick might think I'm passing out cause she's so good or something." Everything came out just fine. Except the obvious brain damage.

  8. #8
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    owww...

  9. #9
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member Mjcpr's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    Quote Originally Posted by C&CDean
    But the shattering pain, the brilliant flashes of light, the utter helplessness I experienced for that 15-20 minutes was worse than anything I've done to myself.
    Mrs Mj says this exact same thing about twicet a year.

  10. #10
    .............. OUDoc's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    See? I told you, BSG.

  11. #11
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    Quote Originally Posted by OUDoc
    See? I told you, BSG.

    pfffft. She's out looking for a bridge, some rope, and some rusty spikes as we speak.

  12. #12
    .............. OUDoc's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    Quote Originally Posted by C&CDean
    pfffft. She's out looking for a bridge, some rope, and some rusty spikes as we speak.


    She might want to come by for a tetanus shot first.

  13. #13
    You can stand on it SeattleOUstudent's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    balls to the wall man....balls to the wall.

  14. #14
    Hillbilly Queen

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    Re: Railroad spike?

    One more inch, Dean. Just one more itty-bitty inch and you'd have been...

    ...Lid.

  15. #15
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    Heh.

  16. #16
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member crawfish's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    Quote Originally Posted by BlondeSoonerGirl
    One more inch, Dean. Just one more itty-bitty inch and you'd have been...

    ...Lid.
    That was truly uncalled for.

  17. #17
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member mrowl's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

  18. #18
    Relax, I'm Cleared. DCSooner's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    You call your thangy Gus?

  19. #19
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member Fugue's Avatar
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    Quote Originally Posted by BlondeSoonerGirl
    One more inch, Dean. Just one more itty-bitty inch and you'd have been...

    ...Lid.
    mint sprig spek to ya if I could.

  20. #20
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    Re: Railroad spike?

    Quote Originally Posted by DCSooner
    You call your thangy Gus?
    No, she does.

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