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  1. #21
    Mmm... ...ribs.

    BigRedJed's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    Quote Originally Posted by TexasLidig8r
    Oh what, pray tell, does the good book have to say about... Jerusalem Cruisers? a/k/a Jesus' boots? a/k/a.... sandals?

    I say on a man.. NEVER... not in public, not in private, not on the beach.. nowhere. This isn't the Middle East.
    From the book:
    Socks with sandals and dark socks with shorts are statements to be avoided.

    Sandals? On the beach, in the backyard.
    Oh, and TOTP, sandals-wearers.

  2. #22
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    BigRedJed's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    And the "red_angel_14" review is from a crack smoker. In the thread that started this, I told SSA it sounded like her.

  3. #23
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    More:
    With the possible exception of an Ivy League football game during withch people are shouting "boolah boolah" and "twenty-three skidoo," it is never, ever acceptable for a person of the male persuasion to wear a fur coat - not raccoon, not fox, not mink.

    Certain men's coats, however, can tolerate having their collars trimmed in a short, subdued fur.

    Patchwork rabbit does not qualify as subdued.

  4. #24
    Hillbilly Queen

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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    Fiddy Cent's gonna kick your *** for that, pretty boy...

  5. #25
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    More:
    The trench, while an excellent raincoat and quite versatile in a pinch, is not a proper winter topcoat.

    The Chesterfield coat is.

    When you buy a trench, the Burberry.

    Shearlings are fine, if a little cowboyish, which brings us to the next subject:

    Cowboy boots no.

    Cowboy hats: no.

    Cowboy shirts: probably not.

    Large belt buckles: only if you're a cowboy.

    P.S. Don't leave that bolo tie in your dresser drawer.

    You could die.

    Someone could find it.

  6. #26
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    Quote Originally Posted by SactoSooner
    One reviewer's comments
    Can I have "Things That Are Ghey" for $800, Alex?
    I'm not happy until you're not happy.

  7. #27
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    More:
    Wearing a suit does not make you "a suit."

    Wearing a bad suit or an incorrectly tailored suit or the same damned striped navy suit every day does.

    The good suit: horn buttons, hand-stitched lapels, felt under the collar, canvas interlining (stitched, not glued, in place), and a fabric soft enough to wear for twelve hours without making you itch to take your pants off.

    There are no bargains.

  8. #28
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    BigRedJed's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    Actually, most ghey men would run screaming from this book. On the other hand, if you'd like to maybe pick up a woman for the first time, pay attention.

  9. #29
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    BigRedJed's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    More:
    A custom-made suit is called "bespoke" because it has been ordered, or spoken for, by the customer.

    Everyone should own at least one bespoke suit.

    Given that bespoke suits take two months to make and can cost five grand and really aren't all that much better than an expensive, high-quality store-bought suit, there's no need to own more than one.

  10. #30
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    More:
    That one suit should be navy, black, or dark gray, and solid.

    Because it took two months to make and cost five grand - you need to be able to wear it often and with everything.

    Center vent: all-American.

    Ventless: Italian, and not for the prodigiously buttocked.

    Side vents: rather English. Quite.

  11. #31
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member Scott D's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    style sucks...I'll stick with wearing jeans and t-shirts...polo shirts when it's formal
    "The mark of a great player is in his ability to come back. The great champions have all come back from defeat." - Sam Snead

  12. #32
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    More:
    Fabrics for easy-traveling suits: nailhead, crepe, tweed.

    Fabrics for hot days: cotton, linen, seersucker.

    Seersucker: not to be worn by men under fifty or whose primary residence isn't immediately adjacent to the county courthouse in a Southern state.

  13. #33
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member TUSooner's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    Hey, I must be hopeless 'cuz I don't even understand half the sh*t they are talking about. I used to wear suits a lot, and still have some, never occurred to me to wear sneakers or sandals with them. And didn't Sergio Valente direct those old Clint Eastwood westerns? What's he got to do with style? buhhhhh.
    You tell me it's the institution. Well, you know, you'd better free your mind instead.
    (Shoo-bee doo-wah)

  14. #34
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    BigRedJed's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    Quote Originally Posted by Scott D
    style sucks...I'll stick with wearing jeans and t-shirts...polo shirts when it's formal
    Wrong. Trendy fashion sucks. Style is something we should all aspire to. And you can have style even wearing jeans and a t-shirt. They get to that later.

  15. #35
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    BigRedJed's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    More:
    Maximum nuber of inches that the waist of new trousers can be taken in before the back pockets begin to meet: two.

    Gold buttons are not a necessary precondition for a jacket to be worn as a blazer.

    In fact, gold buttons are never necessary, Admiral.

  16. #36
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member TUSooner's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    Quote Originally Posted by BigRedJed
    Wrong. Trendy fashion sucks. Style is something we should all aspire to. And you can have style even wearing jeans and a t-shirt. They get to that later.
    Just because I might be hopeless doesn't mean I'm not a little interested.
    Carry on.
    You tell me it's the institution. Well, you know, you'd better free your mind instead.
    (Shoo-bee doo-wah)

  17. #37
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member TopDaugIn2000's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    Maximum nuber of inches that the waist of new trousers can be taken in before the back pockets begin to meet: two.
    isn't it usually the OTHER way around????
    Quote Originally Posted by Missouri's Coach Stein
    "When I heard Shaq had been traded, I was hoping it had been for the Paris twins because they are ridiculous," Stein joked. "They're probably the two toughest post players to guard in the country."
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  18. #38
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    Quote Originally Posted by BigRedJed
    Wrong. Trendy fashion sucks. Style is something we should all aspire to. And you can have style even wearing jeans and a t-shirt. They get to that later.
    Style NEVER goes out of fashion.

    The cowboy boots statement does not take into account the demands of life in the great Southwest.


    In Pacem Requiescat --- October 5, 2003 - October 18, 2010.

  19. #39
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    BigRedJed's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    More:
    When the exchange rate is right, it can be cheaper to buy a plane ticket, fly to Italy, and buy two suits there than to buy them in the States. Plus, you get to go to Italy.

    Other things to buy in Italy: Florentine leather goods, Pinader stationary, Acqua di Parma cologne, and, the height of style, a really cool Vespa.

    Not all Florentine leather goods are good.

    All Vespas, however, are really cool.

  20. #40
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    BigRedJed's Avatar
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    Re: Things a ****ing Hillbilly Should Know... ...about style.

    Quote Originally Posted by TexasLidig8r
    Style NEVER goes out of fashion.

    The cowboy boots statement does not take into account the demands of life in the great Southwest.
    I agree with the cowboy boots thing, though I don't have any these days. They do to, actually. I'll skip forward to the last page of the book:
    To slavishly follow every new fashion trend because it is fashionable and trendy is to reveal a profound insecurity, and that is not what style is about.

    At the end of the day - or, in this case, the book - know simply that you need only remember and bring to bear those style guidelines that work best for you.

    Put another way:
    To have absolute style is to break absolute rules - sometimes even these.

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