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  1. #1
    What? 3rdgensooner's Avatar
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    Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    China's economy isn't the only thing getting bigger

    Behold China's portable Speedo bulge, a new way to handle the "disappearing act" that even Houdini would find impressive

    Maybe it’s the glassy waters of Asia that make local boys ditch the bulky board shorts and feel closer to nature. Nothing says, "I love the water," like snapping on a pair of skin-tight man panties.


    No longer green with envy ...

    But there's a less liberating side of the barely dressed beach look. Just as non-voluptuous women at bikini-mandatory spots such as Dino Beach often feel the sting of physical inadequacy, it turns out that men struggle with insecurities related to the dreaded "disappearing act" as they emerge from unforgiving ocean temperatures.

    Not anymore.

    Just in time for summer, a Chinese company has introduced the Male Size-Enhancing Speedo Bulge.

    Sold on Taobao.com (in English at Taobaofieldguide.com), this lightweight, one-size-fits-all cup fits snuggly inside a Speedo to re-create the "natural arch" essential to the beach male's sense of potency and well-being.

    To avoid an unexpected slip of the sack, each cup is equipped with “bra hooks” that attach to the swimmer-friendly cod-sack.

    Gone are the days of creeping out of the water holding close to “an interesting species of seaweed” just to divert attention.

    The Male Size-Enhancing Speedo Bulge sells for RMB 53 (about US$8) -- a small price to pay for the confidence “boost.”

  2. #2
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1 jumperstop's Avatar
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    Re: Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    Nothing says, "I love the water," like snapping on a pair of skin-tight man panties.

  3. #3

    Re: Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    note to self - online shopping for later....

  4. #4
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1 soonerchk's Avatar
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    Re: Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    As if the speedo wasn't enough of a major turn on!!!!!
    Omelet Posse Omelette


    "even when they stumble more than once, they never step into dog**** ... f***in' sooner magic."~another sad horn

  5. #5
    Sooner All-World olevetonahill's Avatar
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    Re: Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    As long as Mines big enough to satisfy ME , I dont care about anything else.
    http://www.soonerfans.com/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=38933&dateline=130040  9398

    Quote
    If God wanted Men to look women in the eyes, He wouldnt have gave em Boobs !

  6. #6

    Re: Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    They don't sell bananas anymore in China??


  7. #7
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1 GKeeper316's Avatar
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    Re: Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    one size fits all...

    pfft
    There's few things in the world that can't be fixed by the liberal application of duct tape.

    Those who say winning isn't everything are the people you want to play against.

  8. #8
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member Mongo's Avatar
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    Re: Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    Quote Originally Posted by soonerchk View Post
    As if the speedo wasn't enough of a major turn on!!!!!
    :putting away banana hammock:

  9. #9
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member KantoSooner's Avatar
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    Re: Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    One of the funniest things about being a white guy in Asia was the stereotyping. We are:

    1. Incredibly well endowed
    2. Great dancers and romancers
    3. Excellent singers
    4. Tall and physically dominating
    5. Fantastic athletes
    6. Not very smart
    7. Unreliable with money
    8. Poor performers in school
    9. Hot headed
    10. Prone to criminal activity
    11. Overall: not executive material or marriageable


    On the other hand, there were a fair number of young women who really had to have that fling before going off to marry their carefully selected 'Salaryman'.

    So much fun, stereotypes...
    "I don't know karate, but I know ka-razor!" - James Brown

  10. #10
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member Dio's Avatar
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    Re: Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    I was in the pool!
    "ESPN and Texas are now one and the same." -Stewart Mandel

  11. #11
    Sooner All-World StoopTroup's Avatar
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    Re: Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    Quote Originally Posted by Dio View Post
    I was in the pool!

  12. #12
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1 soonerloyal's Avatar
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    Re: Guys, stop worrying about shrinkage.

    Wow, it's like a Wonder Crotch-Bra for men. False advertising is now gender-equal.
    "I thought the only way we could beat Bama is if they came in unmotivated like we did against Boise. Bama wasn't caught off guard, OU didn't use cheap-*** trickeration...for 60 minutes we punched them in the face and they went down." - SoonernAR

    "The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously."
    - Hubert H. Humphrey



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