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  1. #21
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?


  2. #22
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Quote Originally Posted by oudavid1 View Post
    Because the Navy would have to give them a ride.

    the Navy is the Marines daddy.
    Don't you have people you need to be shakin down for insider info????
    History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.
    -Napoleon Bonaparte

  3. #23
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Quote Originally Posted by Cornfed View Post
    And the president's own (the Marine Corps Band) is who's playing the tune.
    Are you attempting Marine Corps Band smack talk?? Those guys don't even go to Boot Camp and start at the rank of Staff Sergeant...



    It seems that after WW I, the war to end all wars, the US Govt. had a lot of surplus material that they had no use for. What to do with it was a problem, and it was finally decided to hold an auction and sell everything off.

    The day of the auction came, and progressed smoothly throughout the day. At the end of the day, everything had been sold off except the Marines and an old jackass.

    Not wanting anything left over, the govt. decided to flip a coin between the Army and Navy, the winner getting their choice of the two left over items.

    The Army won the toss, and the rest is history.

  4. #24
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    New Enlistment oaths.

    U.S. COAST GUARD ENLISTMENT OATH
    "I, (State your name), swear to sign away 4 years of my life to the UNITED STATES COAST GUARD because I know being in the real military scares me. However, I swear to defend our position as the fifth branch of the Armed Services, although at one point we were under the Department of Homeland Security. I understand that atleast twice a day, someone will refer to me a member of the Air Force or Navy, and when I correct them, they will question my military status. I will work on boats the size of kayaks and small yachts during the worst of natures storms, and recieve no thanks or notice form the public. I will fly in helos into the eye of the storm to rescue people dumber then rocks, and then be heckled by the same people when I bust them for transporting drugs two months later.! I will prevent thousands of gallons of pollution, but be accused of impeding the economy when I won't allow vessels to pour oil into the ocean. I will be the red-headed step child to all of the other services, although I know I got the better deal. All of my equipment will be discarded Navy property. I will use most of my time in the Coast Guard to take college classes, and perfect my web surfing abilities, then complain that I work too much. I will perfect avoiding PT at all costs, and do my best to attend training that will give me a great competitive edge in the career field of my choice, making retention efforts of the Coast Guard pointless. I will come in contact with so many pollutants during my tenure, I will glow in the dark for the rest of my natural life and refer to myself as "salty" because of it. I will do my best to work 8 to 3, with a two hour lunch, on normal days, and have my pager and cell phone surgically attached, SO HELP ME GOD.

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    US AIR FORCE OATH OF ENLISTMENT
    "I, (State your name), swear to sign away 4 years of my life to the UNITED STATES AIR FORCE because I know I couldn't hack it in the Army, because the Marines frighten me, and because I am afraid of water over waist-deep. I swear to sit behind a desk. I also swear not to do any form of real exercise, but promise to defend our bike-riding test as a valid form of exercise. I promise to walk around calling everyone by their first name because I find it amusing to annoy the other services. I will have a better quality of life than those around me and will, at all times, be sure to make them aware of that fact. After completion of "Basic Training", I will be a lean, mean, donut-eating, Lazy-Boy sitting, civilian-wearing-blue-clothes, Chair-borne Ranger. I will believe I am superior to all others and will make an effort to clean the knife before stabbing the next person in the back. I will annoy those around me, and will go home early every day. So Help Me God!"

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    US ARMY OATH OF ENLISTMENT
    "I, (State your name), swear to sign away 4 years of my otherwise mediocre life to the UNITED STATES ARMY because I couldn't score high enough on the ASVAB to get into the Air Force, I'm not tough enough for the Marines, and the Navy won't take me because I can't swim. I will wear camouflage every day and tuck my trousers into my boots because I can't figure out how to use blousing straps. I promise to wear my uniform 24 hours a day even when I have a date. I will continue to tell myself that I am a fierce killing machine because my Drill Sergeant told me I am, despite the fact that the only action I will see is a court-martial for sexual harassment. I acknowledge the fact that I will make E-8 in my first year of service, and vow to maintain that it is because I scored perfect on my PT test. After completion of my Sexual.....er.....I mean "Basic Training," I will attend a different Army school every other month and return knowing less than I did when I left. On my first trip home after Boot Camp, I will walk around like I am cool and propose to my 9th grade sweetheart. I will make my wife stay home because if I let her out she might leave me for a better-looking Air Force guy. Should she leave me twelve times, I will continue to take her back. While at work I will maintain a look of knowledge while getting absolutely nothing accomplished. I will arrive to work every day at 1000 hrs because of morning PT and leave everyday at 1300 to report back to "COMPANY." I understand that I will undergo no training whatsoever that will help me get a job up! on separation, and will end up working construction with my friends from high school. I will brag to everyone about the Army giving me $30,000 for college, but will be unable to use it because I can't pass a placement exam. So Help Me God!"

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    US NAVY OATH OF ENLISTMENT
    "I, Top Gun, in lieu of going to prison, swear to sign away 4 years of my life to the UNITED STATES NAVY, because I want to hang out with Marines without actually having to BE one of them, because I thought the Air Force was too "corporate," because I didn't want to actually live in dirt like the Army, and because I thought, "Hey, I like to swim...why not?" I promise to wear clothes that went out of style in 1976 and to have my name stenciled on the butt of every pair of pants I own. I understand that I will be mistaken for the Good Humor Man during summer,! and for Nazi Waffen SS during the winter. I will strive to use a different language than the rest of the English-speaking world, using words like "deck, bulkhead, cover, geedunk, scuttlebutt, scuttle and head," when I really mean "floor, wall, hat, candy, water fountain, hole in wall and toilet." I will take great pride in the fact that all Navy acronyms, rank, and insignia, and everything else for that matter, are completely different from the other services and make absolutely no sense whatsoever. I will muster, whatever that is, at 0700 every morning unless I am buddy-buddy with the Chief, in which case I will show up around 0930. I vow to hone my coffee cup-handling skills to the point that I can stand up in a kayak being tossed around in a typhoon, and still not spill a drop. I consent to being promoted and subsequently busted at least twice per fiscal year. I realize that, once selected for Chief, I am required to submit myself to the sick, and quite possibly illegal, whims of my newfound "colleagues." So Help Me Neptune!"

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    US MARINE CORPS OATH OF ENLISTMENT
    "I, (pick a name the police won't recognize), swear..uhhhh....high-and-tight.... grunt... cammies....kill....fix bayonets....charge....slash....dig....burn....blow up....ugh...Air Force women....beer.....sailors wives.....air strikes....yes SIR!....whiskey....liberty call....salute....Ooorah Gunny....grenades...women....OORAH! So Help Me Chesty PULLER!"

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    History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.
    -Napoleon Bonaparte

  5. #25
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1 adoniijahsooner's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Man, that was some good stuff!!

  6. #26
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1 SoonerKnight's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    The Marines are in the Department of the Navy. The Navy allows them to exist!!

  7. #27
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1 SoonerKnight's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Actually, there is no Marines in the Naval Academy. When they graduate or a little before they choose Marine or Navy. All the same really only the Navy have higher IQ's.

  8. #28
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Squids are a lower form of Marine life.
    History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.
    -Napoleon Bonaparte

  9. #29
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1 SoonerKnight's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Well that lower life form has saved a few Marines every now and again.

  10. #30
    Angry Bird OUthunder's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Quote Originally Posted by soonerchris View Post
    The United States Marine Corps is a department of the navy. Thus. The navy sets our budget and everything else we would get. About the softie comment. Heh!! How do you take seriously a group of people that collectively is a bunch of semen?!?! Just askin
    heh
    My kids rock the flock!

  11. #31
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Quote Originally Posted by SoonerKnight View Post
    Well that lower life form has saved a few Marines every now and again.
    Yeah we do like having the corpmens around to give us our penicilin shots.
    History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.
    -Napoleon Bonaparte

  12. #32
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1 SoonerKnight's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Yeah figured those Navy jets flying over are useful as well unless you wanted to wait on the Air Force!!

  13. #33
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Quote Originally Posted by SoonerKnight View Post
    Yeah figured those Navy jets flying over are useful as well unless you wanted to wait on the Air Force!!
    Hey now we have jets we rent from the swabbies.
    History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.
    -Napoleon Bonaparte

  14. #34
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1 soonerinkaty's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    I don't care if you're in the Navy or Marines, I shake your hand the same and give you the same respect, because I appreciate what you do.
    Quote Originally Posted by C&CDean View Post
    You're all fags. Of the highest order.
    Quote Originally Posted by Leroy Lizard View Post
    Damn, I can't think of anything smart-assed to say in response.
    posse member

  15. #35
    Sooner All-Big XII-2-1+1-1+1
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Two Marines boarded a quick shuttle flight out of Dallas, headed for San Diego. One sat in the window seat, the other sat in the middle seat. Just before take-off, a Sailor got on and took the aisle seat next to the two Marines.

    The Sailor kicked off his shoes, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the Marine in the window seat said, "I think I'll get up and get a coke."

    "No problem," said the Sailor, "I'll get it for you."

    While he was gone, the Marine picked up the Sailor's shoe and spit in it. When the Sailor returned with the coke, the Marine in the middle seat said, "That looks good, I think I'll have one too."

    Again, the Sailor obligingly went to fetch it and while he was gone, the Marine picked up the soldier's other shoe and spit in it. The Sailor returned and they all sat back and enjoyed the rest of the short flight to San Diego.

    As the plane was landing, the Sailor slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened.

    "How long must this go on?" the Sailor asked.

    "This fighting between our services? This hatred? This animosity? The spitting in shoes and pissing in cokes?"

  16. #36
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member picasso's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    I've got a bladder full of whizz for any of you wankers who want to rag on the Marines.

  17. #37
    Sooner Benchwarmer Jason Alexander's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    The Merchant Marines play Div III football. Is that close enough?

  18. #38
    Sooner Starter SoonerBacker's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    "Always there at the brink of victory and close to breaking through and claiming what we've earned, and then pushed back each time." - oSu fan

  19. #39
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member Sooner in Tampa's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    Quote Originally Posted by olevetonahill View Post
    You know why every Navy ship has Marines on it dont ya?


    Sheep be to obvious
    I'm gonna neg your *** to Bolivia


    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Beanbag View Post
    Six stitches is a pretty decent sized gash.
    Quote Originally Posted by OUthunder View Post
    To hell with Nebraska...they are overrated and irrelevant.

  20. #40
    SoonerFans.com Elite Member Sooner in Tampa's Avatar
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    Re: Question...Why doesn't the Marines have a football team?

    We don't protect a sissy *** QB, We protect the Nation.

    'Nuff said

    If I want any **** from a squid...I will squeeze is super soft ****ing melon!!!

    OOH RAH, SEMPER FI MARINES


    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Beanbag View Post
    Six stitches is a pretty decent sized gash.
    Quote Originally Posted by OUthunder View Post
    To hell with Nebraska...they are overrated and irrelevant.

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