So I met a girl...

Oh....

snap.

 

ok ok, that was mean. Good luck, SicEm, I hope she says yes.





...the date would make an even BETTER thread

 

I'll let you all know of the result. I do hope she at least gives me a chance. I appreciate the well wishes though.

 

then i suggest tequilla

patron anejo

lots of it

 

#1. Be specific when you ask her out (day, time, place)
#2. Be confident.
#3. Ask her questions and listen to her answers.
#4. Be courteous and gentlemanly.
#5. Be tastefully humorous but make sure you have an edge. If there is a doosh nearby, don't get irritated and overtly comment on the doosh, but let her see the twinkle in your eye as you size the doosh up and dismiss him.
#6. Stand by your opinions even if she disagrees.
#7. Do "the hand touch test."
#8. Place your hand on the small of her waist as she walks through a door which you're holding open for her.
#9. Make the date comfortable. Don't try too hard to impress. Be yourself and trust that will be impressive enough.
#10. Have fun. NO MATTER WHAT.

 

I'm really going to wish you well on this one SicEm.

It really sounds like you haven't given to much though about all of this this time.

True you stated you two have politics in common but that's a good way to keep the conversation going so you can get to know more about her as you move on to other discussions. If she's a cerebral thinking type gal and a good match for you...I'm glad you two found each other....seriously.

However...if it's like Colley has said and your just drafting another letter to the Penthouse Forum...you should quit doing that.

 

"Don't put the ***** on a pedestal"

 

x2

 

Rules on complimenting women:

#1. Never compliment their body. Ever. (until she's your SO)
#2. Always be specific. (ie: Those shoes are hot. That color looks amazing on you. etc)
#3. Never equate them to a relative or ex.
#4. Notice their eyes.

On the ex thing...never mention an ex. Don't mention miserable dating failures. Don't talk about expectations for a LOOOONG time.

 

All good advice. What's the "hand test?"

 

After a bit of time has transpired in the date, touch her hand but don't try to hold it (while at the dinner table, etc.) If she doesn't move her hand, things are going well.

 

SicEm, I know I don't speak much on the SO, but I think I might have some advice for you here...

1. Let her talk. A lot. Potential dating interests aren't really that interested in what you have to say, they generally like to hear themselves talk, and the subjects they want to speak about. As long as you keep the conversation centered on what she wants to talk about, but you're engaging, you've got at least 50% knocked out of the way. However, keep certain topics of mutual interest available; you want to be able to keep the conversation going after down time.

2. Eye contact. She's got to feel like she's the absolute center of your party. Keeping eye contact like you think everything she says is interesting as hell is paramount to making a lasting impression.

3. Physical touching. There's got to be at least a little of it at the beginning, but don't start out too strong. Just let her get comfortable with a level of intimacy with you that is out of the ordinary. The rest will take care of itself.

Yes, these seem obvious, something Dad might have mentioned, but guess what, your daddy somehow contributed his half, so he might know a thing or two. The most important thing, however, is that you never lose self-confidence! Some girls just aren't meant to be wooed on the first date. However, over time they'll see that you aren't just another guy on the street. Impatience has killed more potential relationships than sheep illness on aggie farms.

 

I like what you've said here. I will say that I am VERY patient. If you knew how long I dated my last girlfriend before she finally put out then you'd realize how VERY patient I am....

I think I can handle all of your advice except for #3. I'm just not very touch-feely with someone I'm not already in a relationship with. I never ever hug people or put my arm around friends or anything like that. I'm going to have a real hard time with that. It just doesn't come naturally to me.

 

Don't ask if she spits or swallows until the 2nd date. :dean:

 

i'm not sure what you mean by that. Unless you know someone well, you don't know how touchy-feely they are. Physical contact can be off-putting if it'd done the wrong way or too soon. It can seem presumptuous or over-eager.

LAS's suggestion about touching her waist when you hold a door = good.

The hand test = good.



oh, and clean out your car before you pick her up. I don't mean it has to be spotless, but make sure there's nothing in the passenger seat or in the floor.

 

Is it one of those girls from Baylor in the stands? You know, the ones that were farked sometime ago?

 

This is the best advice in the thread. I'm not saying you should employ the same approach, but you need the same end-result.

Rouge's friend's approach leaves him relaxed and unassuming (in other words: not desperate or self-conscious) and allows him to be an unforced charming version of himself. If you start worrying about tricks and lines and moves and appearances, you're screwed -- and not in the way you're wishing for -- unless the girl is desperate and if that's the case, you'll know soon enough.

 

must.... resist.... sophomoric.... response....


good luck, dude.

 

I HIGHLY agree with #'s 1 and 2....practice mad listening skilz, and ask questions based on what she says....it's all about HER.