Help me name my goat

[Sooner Born Sooner Bred]

I am going to buy a goat so I don't have to pay to have my lawn mowed anymore. What should I name it?

[soonerbrat]

Nanny

[salth2o]

When I was growing up we had a goat for similar purposes and named him Weedeater.

[rufnek05]

fred

[yermom]

Billy

[Ardmore_Sooner]

Super Goat

[StuIsTheMan]

Baaaaaad AAAAAAsssss:D

[Mixer!]

T. Boone

[crawfish]

Honey

[mdklatt]

Aggie Bait

:eek:

[soonerbrat]

don't let the aggies near your goat.

[GrapevineSooner]

Hot Carl

[critical_phil]

Horny Weed

[M]

Horsepig Wannabe

[RFH Shakes]

Dog

[rufnek05]

maximus

[slickdawg]

Phil Ashio

[Tear Down This Wall]

Scape

[Harry Beanbag]

Les Miles

[soonervegas]

Dr. Chim Richalds

[sanantoniosooner]

John Helander

[SoonerStormchaser]

STEVIE NICKS

[Harry Beanbag]

Hugo Chavez

[OUHOMER]

Blade Runner for grass blade

[sanantoniosooner]

@

[soonerboomer93]

rug muncher

[SoonerBOI]

Mack

[phead903]

Roper

[StoopTroup]

Bevo

[AlbqSooner]

If he is friendly, name him Casper.

[SoonerGirl06]

Booger

[Ike]

Buckner.

[SoonerGirl06]

Oooo! I like that. It has a nice ring to it.

[Ike]

or maybe Bartman...if'n you're a cubs fan.

[KC//CRIMSON]

McLovin

[r5TPsooner]

Deacon

[Rogue]

Is your goat gonna be hawt?

[Rogue]

You name one goat...

[Viking Kitten]

Horsepig Wannabe

If you wannabe my horsepig, you gotta get with my friends...

[M]

If you wannabe my horsepig, you gotta get with my friends...

Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna ha, I wanna ha, I wanna ha, I wanna ha, I wanna really
really really wanna eat some grass.

[Sooner Born Sooner Bred]

I think I'll sing this song to my goat.

SBSB:
High on a hill was a lonely goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Loud was the voice of the lonely goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

Folks in a town that was quite remote heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Lusty and clear from the goatherd’s throat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

the Children:
O ho lay dee odl lee o, o ho lay dee odl ay
O ho lay dee odl lee o, lay dee odl lee o lay

SBSB:
A prince on the bridge of a castle moat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Two Children:
Men on a road with a load to tote heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

the Children:
Men in the midst of a table d’hote heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
SBSB:
Men drinking beer with the foam afloat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo (coughs)

One little girl in a pale pink coat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
VK:
She yodeled back to the lonely goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

SBSB:
Soon her Mama with a gleaming gloat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
What a duet for a girl and goatherd
SBSB and the Children:
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

SBSB and the Children:
Ummm (ummm) . . .
Odl lay ee (odl lay ee)
Odl lay hee hee (odl lay hee hee)
Odl lay ee . . .
. . . yodeling . . .

VK:
One little girl in a pale pink coat heard
Maria:
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hoo hoo
VK:
She yodeled back to the lonely goatherd
Maria:
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

SBSB:
Soon her Mama with a gleaming gloat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hmm hmm
What a duet for a girl and goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

SBSB and the Children:
Happy are they lay dee olay dee lee o . . .
. . . yodeling . . .
Soon the duet will become a trio
SBSB:
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

SBSB (Children):
Odl lay ee, old lay ee (odl lay ee)
Odl lay hee hee, (odl lay hee hee)
Odl lay hee (odl lay hee),
Odl lay odl lee (odl lay odl lee)
Odl lay odl lee (odl lay odi lay)
Odl lay odl lee (odl lay odl lay)
Odl lay odl lay odl lay

the Children:
WHOO!

[TheLurker]

:dean: Aberforth :dean:

[Harry Beanbag]

Lid

[RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!]

Vacuum

[tommieharris91]

Aggie's Best Friend

[goingoneight]

Satan... or the lighter... Jeebus. :)

[crawfish]

Harry Goater

[Ike]

I am a simple goat
I live on the back of a pick-up truck
The Old Man tied me here with a 3-foot rope
Am I happy he don't give a ****
"Hey goat, I'm gonna beat your head in with a hickory stick"
Sometimes he uses his fists
He's filled with anger, and filled with rage
And tells me I smell like ****

His drink, Jimmy Bean
His chaser, a bear
After that, various alcohols
That's when the beatings get so severe
Asleep I pray he falls

But don't feel sorry for me
Things weren't always this bad
Why, when I was a young talking goat
The Old Man was just like my dad

I come from the hills of Europe
That's where I met the Old Man
He was lost in the woods, I gave him directions
He gave me a tuna can

Then he stopped in his tracks
And he said, "Hey Goat!
Would you like to live with me?
I've got a house with a pick-up truck
In a place across the sea"

I said, "Sure, why not, I've got no family
You seem like a nice guy"
So we went off to America
The home of the apple pie

On the boat, the Old Man told me
I would be a present for his wife
"A talking goat!" he exclaimed,
"She'd never seen this in her life"
I felt so special!

Well, I just couldn't believe it
After all theses years I finally had a friend
He trimmed my beard
He scraped my hooves
I prayed it would never end

But when we got to his house
There was no wife
Only a short, short letter
It said: "I'm leaving you for your brother
Because he ****s me better"

His eyes filled with tears of sadness
His heart was filled with grief
To soothe himself he drank a pint of Old Granddad
And beat me like a side of beef

I screamed, "Send me back to the hills of Europe!"
He just shook his head and said, "Nope!
No one will ever leave me again
To make sure, put on this 3-foot ****ing rope."

Present day, I've been on the truck for 51 years
My only friend is the AM radio
Sometimes the neighborhood children stop by
But it's always rocks and beer bottles they throw

At first they're excited to see a talking goat
They gather around to hear what I have to say
But I guess sometimes my stories go on too long
So they leave and giggle I need a bidet

But you know there was a night that I did get off the truck
When the Old Man was passed out drunk
Three neighborhood kids took me to a rock 'n roll concert
The kind of music, old-school funk

It was the first time I got off the truck
The music made me lose control
The lead singer asked if we were having fun
I said, "****ing crank that rock 'n roll!"

The women at the show were beautiful
As they danced sexily on the soft grass
One of them even petted my fur
**** me in the goat-***!

Then some long-haired guys grabbed me by the horns
And threw me in the mosh pit
They passed me around and treated me nice
Till I nervously sprayed them with ****
Then the music stopped
And everything was quiet
And all the rock 'n rollers started a ****ing goat-riot

Kill the goat!
Kill the goat!
Kill the goat!
Kill the goat!

They chased me under the bleachers
They chased me onto the street
They chased me into an alley
And said I was a dead ****ing goat meat

But then I saw a sight
That I never thought I'd see
The Old Man swinging his hickory stick
But he wasn't swinging at me
"**** you, pot-smoking turkeys!
Don't you press your luck!"

The long hairs ran away screaming
As I scrambled onto the truck
When we got home, the Old Man said,
"Goat, you broke the sacred law
No! Please! Sorry! ****!
I'll let it go this time, but if you leave again
I'll break your ****ing jaw!"
Super! Great! Okay!

"Thank you Old Man, for saving my life
Thank you again and again
You could have let them barbeque me,
But you acted like a friend"

"I'm not your friend, I don't even like you
I'm just not drunk," he said
To prove his point, he drank a bottle of grain alcohol
And beat the ****ing **** out of my head

That night I suffered a concussion
Deep inside my goat brain.
I still cannot feel my tailbone
And I'll probably never walk straight again


I guess you'd call me a scapegoat
A punching bag for the Old Man to mock
Just because his wife left him
For his brother's abnormally large ****

He could have been my buddy
But instead he's a crazy old ****
And, once again, I go to sleep in my eternal home
The back of the pick-up truck

Goodnight, Old Man!
Yeah, goodnight Goat!

[SoonerBOI]

Jose

[SoonerBOI]

"Amigo" - politically correct name:D

[Buck36]

http://www.myclassiclyrics.com/artist_biographies/prince_symbol.gif

[phead903]

Chocolate Sex - oh wait, wrong thread....:D

[yermom]

Chocolate Rain

[StoopTroup]

Old Goat