RIP Betty

[Mjcpr]

Betty was my grandma....I don't know why but I never called her "grandma". My brother was the same way. My dad too. Never grandma or mom, just Betty. Must've been one of those things that started wayyy back and never changed. It never even felt weird to not call her grandma.

So she's been battling Alzheimer's for several years now, the last two and a half in a nursing home. It has been quite some time since she knew me but she still talked a lot when I visited; wasn't always about anything but she sure loved to talk. I've spent these last 2+ years visiting her, taking care of her affairs and all that. Selling her car, selling her houses. Getting rid of so much stuff and so many memories. Countless photographs and movies.

On Monday, she got noticably worse. I visited after work, usually we visit on Fri or Sat and have nearly every single weekend since she went to the nursing home....if only I'd been that dilligent when she was still "with us". They called me early this morning and told me we'd better come soon, she wasn't doing well. So we rushed to her town and sat with her until she finally slipped away, quietly, mid-morning.

I hate this. Unfortunately, I have a lot of experience and it doesn't ever get any easier losing a loved one. I was very close to my grandma and it's not unlike losing a parent. I know, I've lost one of those too. You should visit your loved ones as often as you can and think of them often. There will come a day when you wish you'd spent more time with them even if they had always been a huge part of your life.

RIP grandma, I'll miss you terribly. :(

[OKC-SLC]

So sorry to hear. Hang in there.

That's good advice.

[royalfan5]

my condolences

[Widescreen]

So sorry to hear that. Sounds like you were a good grandson, visiting her even when she didn't seem to recognize you.

[TopDaugIn2000]

so sorry to hear. alzheimers has to be one of the most cruel diseases EVAR, that's what my grandma suffered of that last 4 years or so of her life.

[Sooner Born Sooner Bred]

So sorry to hear it M. :(

[TopDaugIn2000]

So sorry to hear that. Sounds like you were a good grandson, visiting her even when she didn't seem to recognize you.

to me, that was the hardest part. visiting them in the home when they had no idea who you were. so tough.

[jk the sooner fan]

sorry to hear that dude, i was super close to my grandmother as well......i feel your pain

hang in there

:(

[Mongo]

Man dude, that sucks. Grandparents are the best, and it hurts to lose them. Sorry for you and your family's loss.

You did good still visiting her. I have know people that usually give up and stop visiting their ill relatives, cause it hurts them to see them in a severe state caused by Alzheimer's. Those visits were probably more for you.

Thoughts and prayers your way

[Boomer.....]

Very sorry to hear that. You and your family are in my prayers.

[tulsaoilerfan]

so sorry to hear. alzheimers has to be one of the most cruel diseases EVAR, that's what my grandma suffered of that last 4 years or so of her life.
Ditto for my uncle Gene; he had wasted away to under 80 pounds when he finally died from it; i never realized how horrible that disease was until i saw the way it ravaged his body; my condolences to you and your family:(

[ChickSoonerFan]

I am so sorry. I am sure she enjoyed the times you were there, and I am sure it meant a lot to her. Good for you for being there at the end.

Again, so sorry for your loss....and thanks for the advice for the rest of us.

[Scott D]

condolences bud.

[SoonerBOI]

sorry for your loss...God bless!

[OCUDad]

Sorry for your loss. Lost my Mom to the same disease - watching her deteriorate for seven years was pure hell. Remember Betty as she was before she fell ill, and keep those memories alive through your family.

[crawfish]

Sorry for your loss. Both of my grandmothers contracted Alzheimer's before they died. It was tough seeing them degrade like that into people I didn't even know. It's been six years since my mom's mom passed away, 2 years for my dad's mom, and I still miss them everyday.

[usmc-sooner]

sorry

[slickdawg]

I'm very sorry to hear that. Your actions speak volumes about how much you loved and cared for Betty, and I promise you she's telling others about her exceptional grandson right now.

[colleyvillesooner]

Hang in there buddy...

[OUHOMER]

Sorry to hear about your grandma. I can only hope That when I become a grandpa I have grand kids that will help me thru any trying times that I might go thru..

SPEK TO YOU MY FRIEND

[rufnek05]

So sorry to hear that. Sounds like you were a good grandson, visiting her even when she didn't seem to recognize you.


thats always the hard part. my great grandpa was like that.

[nmsoonergirl]

I'm so sorry for your loss, and I'm for what your family has gone through. I shed a tear or tear reading your post, and will definitely keep you all in my thoughts.

Rest well, Betty, and know that you were loved.

[Melo]

At least you got to hold on to her as long as you did. Im sorry man.

My grandmother died a few years back. She was the first loved one of mine, and it was extremely difficult to deal with. But I still laugh and smile when I remember all of the quirky things she used to do and say, and how she was never too busy to stop and make a sandwich or spaghetti for her only granddaughter. I know shes alive in my thoughts and smiles down on me even now.

Again, sorry for your loss.

[yermom]

i need to call my Betty :( (her name really is Betty)

sorry for your loss man

[olevetonahill]

No words , Just prayers

[RacerX]

Five stars for the love you've shown Betty.

Hang in there.

[Tailwind]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I think most of us can relate. Hugs to you and your family.

[StoopTroup]

My Grandmother on my Mom's side had alzheimers.

It's really hard when they have left you yet they are sitting right in front of you.

I knew she was gone when the last time I met with her I was holding a picture of me and my wife and showing it to her and she said..."I always thought he was a good looking boy". She had no idea it was me in the photo.

Sorry about your Grandmother M...

Prayers to her and your Family...

ST

[PhxSooner]

So sorry for your loss. My remaining grandparents are in their 90s, and are starting to slow down, which is hard to see.

What you did for your grandmother, even when she couldn't recognize you, is something great.

[BlondeSoonerGirl]

I am so sorry. I am sure she enjoyed the times you were there, and I am sure it meant a lot to her. Good for you for being there at the end.

Again, so sorry for your loss....and thanks for the advice for the rest of us.

Word.

And, also...

:(

[OU4LIFE]

no words.

sorry for you.

[Howzit]

Kudos, Matt. Your diligence in terms of both visits and attending to her affairs are truly admirable.

My grandmother is in her mid-90's and slowly heading downhill. While I don't know that she actually has Alzheimer's, her short-term memory is certainly getting worse, and she pretty much just goes moment to moment. Last Christmas every 5 minutes she would ask where her purse was, wanting to check on it, she didn't remember she had just checked on it.

For the 10 years before moving to Dallas I was the golden grand-kid because I was always dropping in and checking on her, taking her to get ice cream, stuff like that. The 2 or 3 years I planned on being in Dallas has turned into 8, and I feel really guilty about not being around as much.

:(

[Newbomb Turk]

very sorry to hear that. Condolences to you and your family.

[OUDoc]

Sorry, again. I know you took excellent care of your grandma.

[1stTimeCaller]

sorry dude.

[stoopified]

Brother you and your family have my prayers and sympathy.My grandma went through all that too and now we are going through the same thing with my mother who is 69 and in a nursing home with Alzheimers.We aren't too sure how aware she is of her newest grandchild(3 month old Jason Charles).It is HARD to see your loved one like this .Hang in there.

[Sooner in Tampa]

That sucks dude...I am sorry to hear about the loss to you and your family.

[MamaMia]

You will meet again; until then...God bless. :(

[CUinNC]

I am sad for your loss too...

True stuff, my Grandmother was my best friend, really. Coolest person I have ever known, even my wife agrees...

hell, she was the one that let me take my first drink of beer...Schlitz it was:)

[GrapevineSooner]

Sorry to hear. :(

[Mjcpr]

My grandmother is in her mid-90's and slowly heading downhill. While I don't know that she actually has Alzheimer's, her short-term memory is certainly getting worse, and she pretty much just goes moment to moment. Last Christmas every 5 minutes she would ask where her purse was, wanting to check on it, she didn't remember she had just checked on it.

Unfortunately, that kind of stuff probably is Alzheimer's. Or at the very least, dementia. My grandmother lived alone and took care of all of her affairs until the night she broke her hip and had to go to a nursing home. She'd ask the same stuff over and over, she would go grocery shopping at 11pm, she'd hide things and forget where she hid them. All that kind of stuff. I'd just usually write it off as "getting older".

And maybe it was, who knows? I have no doubt in my mind that if she had not fallen and broken her hip that she would be alive today. It might be even scarier or I might have had to make even tougher decisions, but I think she would have been alive. The change from the very moment she fell and broke her hip was very difficult to accept.

[yermom]

it's weird how that works with a broken hip. i lost my grandfather (my Betty's husband) almost the same way in January.

[Mjcpr]

it's weird how that works with a broken hip. i lost my grandfather (my Betty's husband) almost the same way in January.

Yep. If an elderly person somehow ends up with a broken hip, it's often the kiss of death. I apologize if anyone has relatives with a broken hip, it's just an observation. Even before she fell and all of this happened, I was aware of this hip issue.

What happened to so sand so? Oh, he fell and broke his hip. Ohh.

I never understood how or why that had **** to do with anything but I'm here to tell you that it does.

[Sooner_Bob]

I just now saw this . . . my condolences.:(

[Sooner_Bob]

Yep. If an elderly person somehow ends up with a broken hip, it's often the kiss of death. I apologize if anyone has relatives with a broken hip, it's just an observation. Even before she fell and all of this happened, I was aware of this hip issue.

What happened to so sand so? Oh, he fell and broke his hip. Ohh.

I never understood how or why that had **** to do with anything but I'm here to tell you that it does.


I lost my grandpa back in '78 from a broken hip . . . I guess their bodies can't handle the trauma from the injury, surgery, rehab, etc.

[King Crimson]

me too. grammaws are the best. i lost both my gpaws in one year. that was real hard. i loved those guys more than anything. crazy old Okie coots with so much dignity. and love for their family.

good on ya mcjpr

[jk the sooner fan]

normally a broken hip immobilizes them, often making them bed-ridden........i just think it saps the will to live right out of alot of them

my grandmother hung around for almost 2 years after hers, but she was never the same

[TUSooner]

Sad to learn it.

I was blessed to know both sets of my grandparents very well for my childhood and youth. They are really a blessing and it urts to lose them. It's too bad we appreciate them more and more the longer after they have gone home.