Twisted nursery rhymes???

[goingoneight]

I posted one last night on here, wondering if you all heard any others... :confused:

Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a little fun.
Stupid Jill forgot her pill and now they have a son.

Roll, Roll, roll your joint. Twist it at the end--
light 'er up, take a puff, pass it to a friend.

Mary had a little lamb, she kept it fat and plastered.
When the price of chosp went up, she ate that tasty bastard.

I could think of prolly 'bout four or five more... just wondering what the fine minds of SoonerFans SO have to offer.

[olevetonahill]

Old mother hubbard
went to the cupboard
to get her poor
dog a bone
when she got there
the cupboard
was bare
so when she bent over
Rover
took over
and gave her a Bone of
His own :eek:

[SoonerStormchaser]

Thank you Andrew Dice Clay!

[Viking Kitten]

Mary had a little sheep
And with that sheep she went to sleep
The sheep turned out to be a ram
Mary had a little lamb

[Viking Kitten]

There was an old lady who lived in a shoe
She had so many children
Her uterus fell out

[goingoneight]

Little Boy Blew...

He needed the money.

:D

[pb4ou]

don't forget Hickory Dickory Dock

:D

[StoopTroup]

There once was a man named Adair
That was ****ing his bitch on the stairs
But the banister broke,
So he doubled his stroke
And finished her off in midair

[AlbqSooner]

There once was a woman from Norway
Hung by her heels in the doorway
Said to her man
Get off the divan
I think I've discovered one more way.

[Chuck Bao]

Most nursery rhymes are already really twisted. They just need modernizing.

My entry:


Georgie Orgy, careful or not,
Liked kissing the girls more than a lot.
But, when the herpes came out on display,
Georgie Orgy ran away.