How do you tell a really sweet (much) older guy

[TopDaugIn2000]

that you're JUST not that into him in THAT way????

[royalfan5]

knock his cane out from under him.

[Scott D]

call him grampa.....it made Howzit leave me alone.

[Mjcpr]

Introduce him to a nice school boy.

http://www.thestagcompany.com/Flash/soundboard/old-man.jpg

[JohnnyMack]

Pepper spray him.

[colleyvillesooner]

Just tell him you have 8,500 posts on a message board. Problem solved.

[Scott D]

apparently Pat fell for the ole ball under the wooden box propped up by a ruler with a string attached to it trick :D

[yermom]

ask him if his kids have any single friends :D

[boomersooner28]

Just tell him you have 8,500 posts on a message board. Problem solved.



LMAO! Spek.

[StoopTroup]

Give him a list of things you want.

[TopDaugIn2000]

ask him if his kids have any single friends :D

they're in HS, but it might be worth a shot. :D

[Howzit]

This is going to crush OU4LIFE.

[bri]

Tell him you need to tell him something and invite him over to your house. Leave the front door unlocked with a note that says, "come on in" and when he arrives, be riding some other dude in teh secks chair. When he starts to ask "What the hell?...", hand him a note that says "This won't be you. Thx plz, k?".

You're welcome.

[KC//CRIMSON]

that you're JUST not that into him in THAT way????


Look him straight in the eye, and tell him you have a penis.

Game over.

[Scott D]

Look him straight in the eye, and tell him you have a penis.

Game over.

he could one of those old wierdos that thinks that kind of thing spices things up...like John Helander. :D

[TopDaugIn2000]

jeeeeez, sorry I asked.

[JohnnyMack]

Tell him you need to tell him something and invite him over to your house. Leave the front door unlocked with a note that says, "come on in" and when he arrives, be riding some other dude in teh secks chair. When he starts to ask "What the hell?...", hand him a note that says "This won't be you. Thx plz, k?".

You're welcome.

Tell him you need to tell him something and invite him over to your house. Leave the front door unlocked with a note that says, "come on in" and when he arrives, be in the back of the house and say, I'll be out in a minute, go ahead and take your clothes off!"(he's a guy, he'll do it). Then have someone dress up like a reporter and have him come out and tell him he's on Dateline's "To Catch A Predator".

You're welcome.

[Howzit]

Tell him you need to tell him something and invite him over to your house. Leave the front door unlocked with a note that says, "come on in" and when he arrives, be in the back of the house and say, I'll be out in a minute, go ahead and take your clothes off!"(he's a guy, he'll do it). Then have someone dress up like a reporter and have him come out and tell him he's on Dateline's "To Catch A Predator".

You're welcome.

I hope Dateline doesn't really do it because I, for one, do NOT want to see OU4LIFE nekkid.

[mdklatt]

PIITB?

[OCUDad]

You shouldn't have led me on.

[Hamhock]

define much older?

[oumartin]

Is he a billionaire?

[tulsaoilerfan]

Yeah, what those 2 just said. :)

[Chuck Bao]

jeeeeez, sorry I asked.

Hey, most of us just refuse to accept no for an answer.

Or "no" means that you've actually considered it and that means I've actually got a shot. ALRIGHT!

[oumartin]

to quote Lloyd Christmas
"so you're telling me there's a chance!"

[SoonerBK]

You should sleep with him, and then never call him back.

[mdklatt]

Just show him the sex chair; maybe that will frighten him off.

[Paperclip]

Could you just tell him you're not into him in that way?

[ChickSoonerFan]

stick it in the pooper....



oh wait...nevermind.

[mdklatt]

Could you just tell him you're not into him in that way?

You expect a girl to be direct??

[Hamhock]

it seems only one option on the board has earned two votes...decision is made.

[yermom]

the pooper?

[mdklatt]

the pooper?

It's a quorum!

[slickdawg]

Tell him you are always a "pitcher" and not a "catcher"

[yermom]

yeah, but what if he's into it?

[reevie]

Pee on his living room floor?

[Hamhock]

yeah, but what if he's into it?


pun intended ?

[Widescreen]

jeeeeez, sorry I asked.
This post could end just about any question-asking thread in the SO.

[OUinFLA]

**** off dip ****

is the standard exit line for SO patrons.
Cant believe you dont remember.

[TopDaugIn2000]

he's in his mid 50s

and NOT a billionaire.



(if he was I wouldn't be asking.......)

[oumartin]

So like a sugar daddy sorta thing is out of the question?

[Sooner24]

jeeeeez, sorry I asked.



Like you expected a serious answer. :rolleyes: :D

[TopDaugIn2000]

So like a sugar daddy sorta thing is out of the question?

I'm thinking that's a 'yes'.

[oumartin]

Just think, you can drive a fancy BMW, wear expensive fine clothing.
You people and your morals.. gah :D

[Soonerus]

Easy to just say no...you must be considering him...

[yermom]

Easy to just say no...you must be considering him...

it's probably her boss and she's trying to be nice ;)

[sanantoniosooner]

So I have a chance?........................................... ...............................................?
;)

[Sooner24]

So like a sugar daddy sorta thing is out of the question?


It sure worked out well for her.

http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/11/anna-nicole-smith-posters.jpg

[Soonerus]

;)

Easy SAS...1 in a million....

[oumartin]

yeah that is what i have been tryin' to get at for the last two days..! :D

[soonerboomer93]

just tell him

"you'll never get to see if the carpet matches the drapes"

[oumartin]

she has hardwood floors!

[GottaHavePride]

It sure worked out well for her.

http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/11/anna-nicole-smith-posters.jpg

Alas, poor "RAWR!!" thread. I knew him, Horatio.

[bri]

http://homepage.mac.com/dtrull/anna/loveaffair/bluedress96.jpg

RAWRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!

[MamaMia]

Tell me how you know this man, and we'll go from there. :)

[crawfish]

Be direct.

[Hamhock]

clearly, you've done something to make this man think you are interested.

did you wear jeans around him?

[OUDoc]

Show him your bewbs.



I have no idea how that's supposed to run him off, I just think he deserves it. ;)

[TopDaugIn2000]

So it all started about 3 weeks ago, I had to get some books for my granny at Mardel, the NW Expressway one was the only one that had them. I headed there after work, and when I got there the tornado sirens started blowing. Did my shopping, left and it was POURING rain. I pulled into Panera to have some coffee and wait out the storm. Struck up a conversation with this (older) gentleman, we ended up talking for about 4 hours. He did ask if I would consider dating someone that much older, and I told him straight out that while we can meet for coffee or dinner or something, the age difference was too great so it would have to be a 'friends only' thing. I really did enjoy our conversation, but that was as far as it could go. He said he had no problem with that.
Since then we have met for coffee after work a couple of times, and then the other night I cooked dinner and he came over. As he was about to leave he turned and kissed me. Not a peck on the cheek kiss either. I'm hoping it was the wine that made him do that, and it's not gonna be all weird now. Next time I see him I've gotta lay down the law, it's JUST a friendship. I don't feel that I lead him on, cause I was straight with him from the start. I just don't wanna hurt him, cause he really is a nice guy and I enjoy his company.

[OUDoc]

So you were wearing a wet T-shirt to your first date?


I'm really not helping, am I? :)

[Hamhock]

this is not going to end well.

the real life situation nor this thread

[TopDaugIn2000]

did you wear jeans around him?

:confused: :confused: :confused:

[crawfish]

You never answered how old the guy was.

Morbid curiosity. ;)

[TopDaugIn2000]

mid 50s

[Hamhock]

:confused: :confused: :confused:


http://www.soonerfans.com/forums/showthread.php?t=63423&highlight=jeans

[crawfish]

mid 50s

Thank goodness.

Not that I'd ever hit on you or anybody else, being married, but it'd suck if I was as old as the "too old" guy. :D

ego safe.

[Howzit]

Thank goodness.

Not that I'd ever hit on you or anybody else, being married, but it'd suck if I was as old as the "too old" guy. :D

ego safe.

you not as old as this guy <> not too old

[TopDaugIn2000]

http://www.soonerfans.com/forums/showthread.php?t=63423&highlight=jeans

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, heh. my hair is a LITTLE longer now ;)


and then when he left he said "so how 'bout I come over saturday evening and we'll get a bite to eat". I said "I'll be out of town saturday, sorry" which wasn't a lie, my niece's bday party is satruday. but then my brother called me last night and said it's been postponed a week cause my SIL got a nose job. hehehehehe guess she had to make the nose smaller to help offset the bigger bewbs she got a year ago. :O

[crawfish]

you not as old as this guy <> not too old

SHE DIDN'T SAY THAT!!!!

[TexasLidig8r]

So, he's mid 50s and you're mid 20s?

Methinks the would be Lothario is feeling his mortality and hopes to find a source of youth and vitality through his interaction with you.

A simple, "Sport, we need to clarify the nature of our association" talk is in order.

From a morbid curiosity aspect.. does he wear cheap cologne (DHL, Lagerfeld, Pierre Cardin) and wear those white casual loafers?

[TopDaugIn2000]

So, he's mid 50s and you're mid 20s?

Methinks the would be Lothario is feeling his mortality and hopes to find a source of youth and vitality through his interaction with you.

A simple, "Sport, we need to clarify the nature of our association" talk is in order.

From a morbid curiosity aspect.. does he wear cheap cologne (DHL, Lagerfeld, Pierre Cardin) and wear those white casual loafers?

I agree.

I didn't smell any bad cologne, and he wore brown loafers. lol

[bri]

Oooh, catty. Sounds like a certain creepy old bastard is jealous of the central Oklahoma chapter of creepy old bastards...

[TopDaugIn2000]

It's prolly cause I made a coconut cream pie. they're to die for, and he just couldn't controll himself I guess. who can blame him though???

[TexasLidig8r]

Oooh, catty. Sounds like a certain creepy old bastard is jealous of the central Oklahoma chapter of creepy old bastards...

dammit Bri... get your ages right. Creepy Old Bastard membership cards aren't handed out until a man hits 50 years old. I have a few years left. I also heard that gold chains and corvettes are handed out to all officers of the COB Club.

[colleyvillesooner]

A simple, "Sport, we need to clarify the nature of our association" talk is in order.


And if you need help with this talk, I'm sure Lid can regurgitate it for you word for word, as he has undoubtedly heard it many times.

:D

[Hamhock]

As he was about to leave he turned and kissed me. Not a peck on the cheek kiss either.


tongue? and did you reciprocate?

[bri]

You can almost hear the uneven panting when you read some of the posts in this thread...:rolleyes:

[TopDaugIn2000]

I'm just afraid he's trying to turn in his old man card by getting a 26 yr old into the sack (or chair, whatever)

[SoonerGirl06]

Is he Sean Connery material? Cuz if he is... forget the age gap and go for it.

[TopDaugIn2000]

Is he Sean Connery material? Cuz if he is... forget the age gap and go for it.

afraid not. :(

[SoonerGirl06]

afraid not. :(

Then drop him like a hot potato sister...

No more dinners, cream pies, etc. This guy obviously didn't understand you when you placed limits on the relationship... or felt the dinner invite actually meant something more.

If you feel uncomfortable with the situation now, you need to end it before it gets worse.. or it will become even more difficult to get out of.

[yermom]

cooking dinner at your place? cream pie? wine?

yeah, that's a little romantic for "friends"

did he see the chair?

[SoonerBK]

I gotta say that if she is going out with dudes that old, then about half of us here on this board definately have a shot.

Does he look like this:texan:

[TopDaugIn2000]

I cook for a lot of my friends, guys and girls. I love to cook. he brought the wine, which I will drink with friends too. I guess it wasn't as harmless as I thought. argh.

[TexasLidig8r]

Then drop him like a hot potato sister...

No more dinners, cream pies, etc. This guy obviously didn't understand you when you placed limits on the relationship... or felt the dinner invite actually meant something more.

If you feel uncomfortable with the situation now, you need to end it before it gets worse.. or it will become even more difficult to get out of.

This sounds like a ... "Dear Penthouse, I never thought this would happen to me, voice of experience" post! :D

[springs sooner]

Cream pie and old men never go good together.

Just lay down the law and if he really is that much into you he will respect your wishes. If not then yes just tell him you used to be a man.

[SoonerGirl06]

This sounds like a ... "Dear Penthouse, I never thought this would happen to me, voice of experience" post! :D

Heh... I just spek'd Lid.




:eek:

[Scott D]

I hope you feel righteously ashamed of yourself... that's tantamount to the problem TDi2K has herself in with the creepy geezer she made a pie for.

[SoonerGirl06]

I hope you feel righteously ashamed of yourself... that's tantamount to the problem TDi2K has herself in with the creepy geezer she made a pie for.

Are you referring to me Scott D?

[Scott D]

ab-so-lute-ly.

now go wash your keyboard and mouse in bleach. :)

[SoonerGirl06]

ab-so-lute-ly.

now go wash your keyboard and mouse in bleach. :)

I'll defer till later... I'm sure I'll end up speking someone else before the night is through. :D

[Scott D]

I'll defer till later... I'm sure I'll end up speking someone else before the night is through. :D

yah but their spek might be tainted with creepy old whorn lawyer guy cooties. :)

[SoonerGirl06]

yah but their spek might be tainted with creepy old whorn lawyer guy cooties. :)

Well, we can't have that now, can we?

[TopDaugIn2000]

ewwwwwwwwwww

[TopDaugIn2000]

bri----I can't spek you again, but I'll just say 'not very often'

[bri]

Heh. :D

[TUSooner]

TD, I think you just told me.
Thanks. I'll get over it.

Good pie, though!

[bri]

That's what we hear.

ZANG!!!

[mdklatt]

I cook for a lot of my friends, guys and girls. I love to cook. he brought the wine, which I will drink with friends too. I guess it wasn't as harmless as I thought. argh.

Unless he already knows that you cook for everybody you know, that's definitely a mixed signal.

[TexasLidig8r]

yah but their spek might be tainted with creepy old whorn lawyer guy cooties. :)

I am very meticulous about insuring I have no cooties.... :mad:

[TopDaugIn2000]

no details plz

[BlondeSoonerGirl]

I am very meticulous about insuring I have no cooties.... :mad:

http://www.tonychor.com/WindowsLiveWriter/ShipsBlogFlyingUnderSail_142AA/crab_thumb%5B1%5D.jpg

[bri]

http://www.naturallook.net/images/largeproducts/hair/hl-disinfectablelicecomb.jpg

[Howzit]

http://www.tonychor.com/WindowsLiveWriter/ShipsBlogFlyingUnderSail_142AA/crab_thumb%5B1%5D.jpg




That there's Juarez-sized...

[sanantoniosooner]

I am very meticulous about insuring I have no cooties.... :mad:
Since even my son knows that girls have cooties, this is no surprize;)

[Hamhock]

you should post his name and number here and have us let him down easy.

[proud gonzo]

generally cooking dinner for a guy is a date-type activity...

[TopDaugIn2000]

so not only do I have to 'splain that I don't want to date him, but I also have to appologize for sending the wrong signals.

this should be fun.....

[sanantoniosooner]

so not only do I have to 'splain that I don't want to date him, but I also have to appologize for sending the wrong signals.

this should be fun.....
Yeah, BJs tend to send a certain message.

[bri]

so not only do I have to 'splain that I don't want to date him, but I also have to appologize for sending the wrong signals.

this should be fun.....

So, yeah...sorry I cooked for you and confused your horny *ss. Here's the Matlock Season 1 box set as a lovely parting gift...

[TopDaugIn2000]

he may be more of a "MASH" guy, but it's a nice suggestion. lol

[Oldnslo]

Why not give him the more traditional parting gift: a bj.

Or nothing.

Say this: "Welcome to dumpsville. Population: YOU!"

[Hamhock]

what's this "bj" of which you speak?

(i've been married 10 yrs)

[GottaHavePride]

Yeah, seriously. cooking dinner for a guy when he's the only guest is a date signal on this kind of scale:

http://media.arstechnica.com/journals/apple.media/thumb/250/250/iamthenight-Batman-Bat-Signal-CEL.jpg

Even inviting him over for dinner when other people are present is a date signal if you've only know the guy for a week and a half. Honestly, meeting the guy for coffee after meeting him by coincidence at a coffee shop during a tornado warning is a signal that a guy will interpret as meaning you're interested. If you didn't want him to think you were interested the proper course would have been to never talk to him again after that day.

the only solution that's going to work? Be direct. Very direct. Don't be mean, but don't try to sugarcoat it and be nice about it, because guys are idiots on a Dumb and Dumber scale. And yes, I mean that every guy at one time or another has thought "so you're saying theres a chance?" Leave no room for this thought to enter the building. Otherwise he'll think you're just playing hard-to-get.

[Soonerus]

I making the call: she's interested....the plot really thickened as more facts were revealed...

[RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!]

you should post his name and number here and have us let him down easy.Rawk on. Haha.

[ChickSoonerFan]

My stepdad says that as long as you continue to talk to a man, no matter what the words are, he is going to think there is a chance.

Tell him you are not interested and then stop talking to him completely. It really is the most effective way. If you piddle around the words and then continue to talk to him, he is going to think you are his girlfriend within a few days.

[TopDaugIn2000]

:eek:

[Okla-homey]

My stepdad says that as long as you continue to talk to a man, no matter what the words are, he is going to think there is a chance.

Tell him you are not interested and then stop talking to him completely. It really is the most effective way. If you piddle around the words and then continue to talk to him, he is going to think you are his girlfriend within a few days.

Your stepdad obviously has a Masters in Manhood Science. I agree 100%. Men are generally incapable of "being friends" with wimmens, and its danged near impossible after having their seckshaul advances rebuffed.

[yermom]

yeah, once you try to jump to the other ladder, it's hard to go back ;)

http://www.laddertheory.com/

[MamaMia]

Okay, I'll tell you the same thing I would tell one of my daughters.

Invite him to meet you at a busy place like Paneras or wherever. Make sure you have your keys handy; in a pocket is good. Only order a beverage because you wont be staying long. Once you are seated, look him right square in the face and don't blink. Tell him that you feel he may have gotten the wrong idea about the expectations of the relationship.

*side note:Most important...Dont let him interrupt you. He may try to start verbally analyzing anything and everything you did or said or explain away the big kiss thing or other things he did or said. Do not allow that to happen because its what men do when they sense they are being dumped and still want to hang on. Just keep in mind that this meeting is not for the purpose of having a conversation. Its to make an announcement. Interrupt him if he does start talking, shut your eyes, hold up your hand and shake your head back and forth and tell him to let you finish.

Continue to say..."Look, the bottom line is that I feel uncomfortable and I think it best for the both of us to move on." Don't even wait for a response. Then look at your watch and say this word for word..."Oops, I'm really running late." Stand up and as you are leaving, shake his hand, fake a smile and say, "I really wish you all the best. I'm sure you'll meet that special someone someday." Then EXIT stage left my dear, and what ever you do, don't look back.

There may be some fall out:
1) He has been in your house. Make sure 'nobody' unlocked a window during any pie tastings.

2) If he has your phone number and calls, say these words..."I'm sorry if I didn't make myself clear, but by "moving on" I meant that I no longer wish to see you or speak with you. I hope you understand", and tell him that you are in the middle of painting your nails and have to go. Do not answer the phone if he calls back.

3) If he does call a third time, call me and I will get ahold of my Uncle Georgio and he will make a friendly little suggestion to this guy who wanted to get you drunk with his wine. Okay?

[sanantoniosooner]

I knew you had to put your daughter up to that.

She wouldn't let me get a word in edgewise.

[RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!]

I knew you had to put your daughter up to that.

She wouldn't let me get a word in edgewise.But, you'll be back.

[olevetonahill]

Mom did it just that way when she Dumped me . I didnt cry . so TD2 K when we having this lil get together ;)

[TopDaugIn2000]

wow, Mom is ROUGH on em.....

[MamaMia]

wow, Mom is ROUGH on em.....
Thats very tame compared to the send off I gave a very handsy I cant take no for an answer guy back in college. ;)

[Jerk]

nevermind. I ain't got nothin'

[Frozen Sooner]

TD, Mom has it right.

You've gone WAY too far for this guy to ever believe that you just want to be friends. I'm sorry, but cooking him dinner at your house WAS a signal, even though you didn't mean it to be one. Not your fault-you thought you were just doing something nice for a friend, he took it another way. Unfortunately, communication happens in the other person's head. :(

If we're interested, we will ALWAYS think there's a chance. Even when a woman says "I'm not looking for a relationship right now" or "I couldn't date someone that much older than me" we think "Ah, but I'm the exception-if she only got to know me..."

So, here's the deal. Tell him flat-out that you are not interested in dating HIM. Specifically HIM. You're not attracted to him, you don't wish to be attracted to him, you're not sorry about it, and that if you are going to continue to be friends he's going to have to get it through his head that you are specifically not interested in HIM that way.

[sanantoniosooner]

Tell him you're really digging the vagina right now.

[bri]

Play nice? I was just asking a vaild question. :D

[proud gonzo]

my freshman year of college a dude called me at 1:30 a.m. (woke up me and my roommate) to tell me he liked me and ask if i liked him too. I said "hell no. And if you call me again, I'll punch you in the face"
a couple of months later, he still hadn't given up and was IMing me, whining "I know I'm not as attractive as you deserve, but i really think it would work between us. Do you think I can have a chance?"

Mom was NOT being "rough" on the guy.

[TopDaugIn2000]

Play nice? I was just asking a vaild question. :D

damn, I missed all the good posts.......guess that's what i get for going to CHURCH

[Scott D]

woo for post deletion. woo for the pm feature too :)

[Scott D]

TD, Mom has it right.

You've gone WAY too far for this guy to ever believe that you just want to be friends. I'm sorry, but cooking him dinner at your house WAS a signal, even though you didn't mean it to be one. Not your fault-you thought you were just doing something nice for a friend, he took it another way. Unfortunately, communication happens in the other person's head. :(

If we're interested, we will ALWAYS think there's a chance. Even when a woman says "I'm not looking for a relationship right now" or "I couldn't date someone that much older than me" we think "Ah, but I'm the exception-if she only got to know me..."

So, here's the deal. Tell him flat-out that you are not interested in dating HIM. Specifically HIM. You're not attracted to him, you don't wish to be attracted to him, you're not sorry about it, and that if you are going to continue to be friends he's going to have to get it through his head that you are specifically not interested in HIM that way.

I deem this post to not be playing nice. :D

[Scott D]

damn, I missed all the good posts.......guess that's what i get for going to CHURCH

eh, my post wasn't good....it was a bad joke that offended Mama, mainly because I tend to like not using emoticons.

[SoonerGirl06]

eh, my post wasn't good....it was a bad joke that offended Mama, mainly because I tend to like not using emoticons.

And she got you gooood too! :D

[Scott D]

And she got you gooood too! :D

damn I guess I shoulda stayed on the board to see it since I didn't see it.

and down with emoticons!

[Jerk]

Just set him down for a nice dinner, let him pay for it, and after dessert just tell him you have a really bad case of genital warts.

[Sooner24]

Just tell him this.

http://www.photocasket.com/attitude/9115.jpg

[tommieharris91]

Just tell him this.

http://www.photocasket.com/attitude/9115.jpg

I'd be afraid of her.

[colleyvillesooner]

If we're interested, we will ALWAYS think there's a chance. Even when a woman says "I'm not looking for a relationship right now" or "I couldn't date someone that much older than me" we think "Ah, but I'm the exception-if she only got to know me..."


I'm about to marry a girl who "wasn't looking"

:D

[Frozen Sooner]

Exactly. That's why we always think we have a chance when they say they're "not looking." We know it's bull**** about 90% of the time.

[opksooner]

.................He did ask if I would consider dating someone that much older, and I told him straight out that while we can meet for coffee or dinner or something, the age difference was too great so it would have to be a 'friends only' thing........... This is where you should have seen where it was going. Response: "That really doesn't interest me. You're very nice but...........I have to go now." Gotta nip it in the bud.

You naively led him on.

[bri]

Yes, even though you established boundaries from the very start, it's entirely your fault that he ignored them and pressed into expressly unwelcome territory. You shameless hussy, you.

:rolleyes:

[sanantoniosooner]

kind of odd that bri would take a contrary position.........:D

[soonerboomer93]

Thats very tame compared to the send off I gave a very handsy I cant take no for an answer guy back in college. ;)


what, marriage?




;)

[bri]

kind of odd that bri would take a contrary position.........:D

No, you've got me confused with another Hills And Trees poster. ;)

I just find it mildly amusing that even though she told the guy at the very start that there wasn't going to be anything romantic going on, it's her fault that the guy was too stupid/desperate/oblivious/whatever. It seems to me that guys are projecting their own dating failures at the hands of a girl that "led them on" and are painting TD2K as some sort of devious, mind-f*cking trollop, and that's just annoying. It's the retarded second cousin of "I raped her because she was dressed like a slut".

[yermom]

i don't think anyone has really attacked her that way, it's just more insight on the mind of us stupid/desperate/oblivious/whatever guys :D

[sanantoniosooner]

I think there is middle ground between "she's a slut" and "she made her position clear".

And I'm not critical of her in any way. I've used this thread to be a smart butt like every other thread. But Mom has given the best advice.

There is a culture of believing that what women say and what they want is not always a match, and there are just enough idiot ladies that give legs to that way of thinking.

I was known as the guy that would clam up if I liked a girl, so I was dead either way. If I talked to them, they thought I liked them. If I stopped talking to them, it was because I was shy and attracted to them. Cursed was I.

[bri]

i don't think anyone has really attacked her that way, it's just more insight on the mind of us stupid/desperate/oblivious/whatever guys :D

Dude, this entire thread is a parade of guys telling her how she totally led this guy on and gave him hope, intentional or not. It's THIS GUY'S fault that he's a f*cktard, but somehow we're gonna make her feel like she's played this guy for a sucker, leading him on and giving him double-secret signs even though she said at the start that if they hung out it would only be as friends.

I don't fault her for thinking she had made a friend, I blame the creepy old guy for thinking she was just "playing hard to get". To me, we don't seem any less narrow-minded or judgemental than the crazy Jebus ladies at her work that call her a prostitute for wearing jeans or whatever. Just replace "wearing jeans" with "cooking".

[Frozen Sooner]

Dude, this entire thread is a parade of guys telling her how she totally led this guy on and gave him hope, intentional or not. It's THIS GUY'S fault that he's a f*cktard, but somehow we're gonna make her feel like she's played this guy for a sucker, leading him on and giving him double-secret signs even though she said at the start that if they hung out it would only be as friends.

I don't fault her for thinking she had made a friend, I blame the creepy old guy for thinking she was just "playing hard to get". To me, we don't seem any less narrow-minded or judgemental than the crazy Jebus ladies at her work that call her a prostitute for wearing jeans or whatever. Just replace "wearing jeans" with "cooking".

WTF, man. I thought I was pretty clear that the fault lay with the creepy old dude, not with TD2K. Obviously, in a perfect world, TD's initial statement of not being interested in a guy that old would have held up and the guy never would have mininterpreted her inviting him to her home for a home-cooked meal. It's not a perfect world, guys aren't perfect, and to tell the truth I've scored more butt off of women who supposedly weren't looking for anything more than friendship than I can count with my gloves, shoes, AND pants off.

All I'm saying is that you have to be absolutely clear with most guys that it's THEM that you're not interested in, because guys are notorious for wishful thinking.

[bri]

Yeah, 'cause I singled you out specifically. Oh, wait, I didn't.

Great, now this post will get deleted. :D

[Frozen Sooner]

Well, you DID say "This entire thread is a parade of guys," so you'll understand how I would think that applied to me.

[ChickSoonerFan]

No, you've got me confused with another Hills And Trees poster. ;)

I just find it mildly amusing that even though she told the guy at the very start that there wasn't going to be anything romantic going on, it's her fault that the guy was too stupid/desperate/oblivious/whatever. It seems to me that guys are projecting their own dating failures at the hands of a girl that "led them on" and are painting TD2K as some sort of devious, mind-f*cking trollop, and that's just annoying. It's the retarded second cousin of "I raped her because she was dressed like a slut".

Wow...I think that is a bit of a stretch. I am not sure anyone is painting her as that at all...not at all. This is a learning experience to her, and anyone else readying it, about relationships between men and women. If a man expresses interest and you are not interested, it is best to not invite them to dinner or offer to continue to see them for dinner/coffee even as "friends". She did not do anything wrong, she had no idea that her words at that first meeting went in one ear and out the other. Now she knows and she can probably see how her actions simply may have added to the fact that no matter what she told him, this dude is is not going to accept or believe her until her actions speak for her. Not her fault, it is a good lesson to learn and sometimes works both ways honestly.

[Sooner24]

Wow...I think that is a bit of a stretch. I am not sure anyone is painting her as that at all...not at all. This is a learning experience to her, and anyone else readying it, about relationships between men and women. If a man expresses interest and you are not interested, it is best to not invite them to dinner or offer to continue to see them for dinner/coffee even as "friends". She did not do anything wrong, she had no idea that her words at that first meeting went in one ear and out the other. Now she knows and she can probably see how her actions simply may have added to the fact that no matter what she told him, this dude is is not going to accept or believe her until her actions speak for her. Not her fault, it is a good lesson to learn and sometimes works both ways honestly.


Agreed.

[bri]

Well then, color me wrong.

TD2K, you should have known better. I'll pray for your soul or something.

[TopDaugIn2000]

Wow...I think that is a bit of a stretch. I am not sure anyone is painting her as that at all...not at all. This is a learning experience to her, and anyone else readying it, about relationships between men and women. If a man expresses interest and you are not interested, it is best to not invite them to dinner or offer to continue to see them for dinner/coffee even as "friends". She did not do anything wrong, she had no idea that her words at that first meeting went in one ear and out the other. Now she knows and she can probably see how her actions simply may have added to the fact that no matter what she told him, this dude is is not going to accept or believe her until her actions speak for her. Not her fault, it is a good lesson to learn and sometimes works both ways honestly.

yeah, I guess it is a lesson. I feel that I made the boundaries clear from the start, and the few times we met for coffee were just that. he didn't try ANYTHING that lead me to believe he would cross the line. so I thought he understood and I invited him over for dinner. Maybe it was the wine. Maybe it was the pie. Maybe I'm just totally irrestible. Who knows. But I do know he is one bold d00d. I'd really like to have him as a friend, but things have to change before that will ever happen.

[hurricane'bone]

mmm...pie.

[crawfish]

my freshman year of college a dude called me at 1:30 a.m. (woke up me and my roommate) to tell me he liked me and ask if i liked him too. I said "hell no. And if you call me again, I'll punch you in the face"
a couple of months later, he still hadn't given up and was IMing me, whining "I know I'm not as attractive as you deserve, but i really think it would work between us. Do you think I can have a chance?"

Mom was NOT being "rough" on the guy.

It only took me three years of that before she finally broke down and married me. :D

[Sooner24]

yeah, I guess it is a lesson. I feel that I made the boundaries clear from the start, and the few times we met for coffee were just that. he didn't try ANYTHING that lead me to believe he would cross the line. so I thought he understood and I invited him over for dinner. Maybe it was the wine. Maybe it was the pie. Maybe I'm just totally irrestible. Who knows. But I do know he is one bold d00d. I'd really like to have him as a friend, but things have to change before that will ever happen.



I would just go with "totally irresistible" and let it go at that. ;)

[ChickSoonerFan]

yeah, I guess it is a lesson. I feel that I made the boundaries clear from the start, and the few times we met for coffee were just that. he didn't try ANYTHING that lead me to believe he would cross the line. so I thought he understood and I invited him over for dinner. Maybe it was the wine. Maybe it was the pie. Maybe I'm just totally irrestible. Who knows. But I do know he is one bold d00d. I'd really like to have him as a friend, but things have to change before that will ever happen.

You didn't do anything wrong, nor should you have "known better" as Bri stated above. :rolleyes:

Maybe he honestly thought that he could do the friends thing, maybe it was the wine, probably you being just totally irresistable. :D His actions on the other meetings made you believe he understood and respected where you stood.

But now that this has happened, you know he has some other feelings.

Good luck, it is never easy to tell someone their feelings are not returned...rejection sucks from both ends.

[soonerbrat]

My stepdad says that as long as you continue to talk to a man, no matter what the words are, he is going to think there is a chance.

Tell him you are not interested and then stop talking to him completely. It really is the most effective way. If you piddle around the words and then continue to talk to him, he is going to think you are his girlfriend within a few days.


Lloyd: What are the chances of a guy like you and a girl like me... ending up together?
Mary: Well, that's pretty difficult to say.
Lloyd: Hit me with it! I've come a long way to see you, Mary. The least you can do is level with me. What are my chances?
Mary: Not good.
Lloyd: You mean, not good like one out of a hundred?
Mary: I'd say more like one out of a million.
[pause]
Lloyd: So you're telling me there's a chance.


http://www.moviepublicity.com/image_assets/dumbdumber_06.jpg

[TopDaugIn2000]

I would just go with "totally irresistible" and let it go at that. ;)

that's the plan. ;)

[TopDaugIn2000]

I will say that if he happened to be about 25-30 years youger I'd be all about him. He really is a nice guy. Too bad for both of us.

[OUDoc]

I will say that if he happened to be about 25-30 years youger I'd be all about him. He really is a nice guy. Too bad for both of us.
You could date his son.

[TopDaugIn2000]

naaa, he's only 16. lol

[OUDoc]

Wait 4-5 years. :)

[MamaMia]

yeah, I guess it is a lesson. I feel that I made the boundaries clear from the start, and the few times we met for coffee were just that. he didn't try ANYTHING that lead me to believe he would cross the line. so I thought he understood and I invited him over for dinner. Maybe it was the wine. Maybe it was the pie. Maybe I'm just totally irrestible. Who knows. But I do know he is one bold d00d. I'd really like to have him as a friend, but things have to change before that will ever happen.He asked you if you would consider dating someone his age. He brought you wine. He planted a lip lock on you. Its quite obvious that hes sexually attracted to you. That is not going to change. A platonic friendship would only serve to put him in the position of having to suppress his attraction toward you, which will naturally make him feel rejected and frustrated. You are in the drivers seat and can do whatever you like, but since you are asking for our advice, my take on the situation is that it would be in the best interest of the both of you, for you to just call it quits.

[Mjcpr]

You are in the drivers seat and can do whatever you like

Are we still talking about the secks chair?

[MamaMia]

Are we still talking about the secks chair?They have a special chair for that? :eek:

I must have missed that thread.

[TopDaugIn2000]

oh no......

[TopDaugIn2000]

I have the Corbu lounge chair, and the guys all think it's my secks chair...

http://designwithinreach.com/images/zoom/zm_8099_1.jpg

[MamaMia]

oh no......
I'll beatcha that secks chair is what hes going to bring over for dinner next time. :D

[MamaMia]

I have the Corbu lounge chair, and the guys all think it's my secks chair...

http://designwithinreach.com/images/zoom/zm_8099_1.jpg
No wonder hes bringing over the wine. :P

[TopDaugIn2000]

hey, Corbu knew exactly what he was doing.....

[MamaMia]

hey, Corbu knew exactly what he was doing.....
All kidding aside TopDaug, what are you going to do about this guy, seriously? :pop:

[Tear Down This Wall]

Kick him in the jimmies...and such.

[booomer]

Start using just one square per bathroom visit and that little problem will take care of itself.

[dolemitesooner]

I told you that you were a ****ing tease......TEASE!!!! lol

[stoopified]

How old is he and how old are you?Answering this msy not help you but could help me decide if I have reached DIRTY OLD MAN status.

[TopDaugIn2000]

How old is he and how old are you?Answering this msy not help you but could help me decide if I have reached DIRTY OLD MAN status.

he's 55, I'm 26.

but remember, I'm totally irrestible. ;) :P ;)

[dolemitesooner]

If a chick tells you shes 26 and looks 28 shes 37

[dolemitesooner]

If a chick tells you shes 26 and looks 28 shes 37

[sanantoniosooner]

If a dude tells you exactly the same thing twice in a row, he's drunk.

[bri]

I think old dude wants to play "hide the pig-dog-man" in teh secks chair, plz thx. ;)

[Scott D]

[chris rock]no matter what a former mascot tells you....there is no secks in the Corbu chair...none. Oh you can lay in the Corbu chair, and you can talk about secks..but there is no secks in the Corbu chair.[/chris rock]