Marital Advice for NormanPride and Badger

[Sooner Born Sooner Bred]

I think they are getting hitched tomorrow. Post your marital advice here.

[bri]

I would, but I'm single. So, if I tried to give any advice to them, it would just look like I was trying to get attention or something.

[Vaevictis]

In no particular order:

1. In an argument, if you always have to win, you're going to lose.
2. If in an argument you think you're about to blow up all out of proportion, walk away.
3. If the other person walks away, let them. Talk about it later when everyone has cooled down.
4. Don't argue about something unless it's worth arguing about. (ie, if you don't really care that much, be magnanimous and let the other person have their way)
5. If one of you is in a bad mood and gets snarky, DON'T get snarky in return. The situation will only get worse if you do.
5. Don't DONT DONT let yourselves accrue debt (other than the typical home/car loan -- and even then, be careful). Debt causes AND multiplies problems down the road.
6. Trust is something people earn, but it's also something YOU choose to do. Even in the face of doubt, you can choose set aside your doubt and trust the other person.
7. Nothing good ever came from jealousy. You either choose to trust your partner or you don't. And if you don't, you probably shouldn't be married.

[PAW]

Hmmmmmm.

How 'bout . . . champion each other's best qualities and laugh with them about everything else.

[slickdawg]

by far, the biggest problems I see in married couple is with money, and the couples that play the "my money" and "your money" game. That is a recipie for disaster.

Slickwife and I put it all in the bank, pay the bills, and talk on major purchases (over $100, generally). We're 13 years happy with that method.

[Newbomb Turk]

secks - lots of it.

[sanantoniosooner]

Share as much personal information as possible on the oval.

[Czar Soonerov]

Stock up on coffee filters.

If you start finding dead hookers lying around, don't complain (nag) about it. He'll bury them in the basement soon enough, he's very busy.

[bri]

Dude, that was touching and creepy all at once. :D

[Vaevictis]

Dude, that was touching and creepy all at once. :D

I don't know about you, but I find touching to be creepy quite often.

[leavingthezoo]

don't be creepy when you're touching?

[bri]

I don't know about you, but I find touching to be creepy quite often.

Thanks for reminding me why I quit Boy Scouts.

[olevetonahill]

He just needs to sit pretty , and BEG .
nuff said

[sooneron]

HI: I dunno ... maybe it's wife, kids, family life ... I

mean are you, uh, satisfied Glen? Don't y'ever feel

suffocated? Like, like there's somethin' big pressin'

down ...



GLEN (solemnly): Eeeeeyep ... I do know the feelin'.



Hi shakes his head.



HI: I dunno-



GLEN: And I told Dottie to lose some weight but she

don't wanna listen!



He roars with laughter and slaps Hi heartily on the back. As

he chuckles sympathetically:



... No man, I know what you mean. You got all kinds

a responsibilities now. You're married, ya got a kid, looks

like your whole fife's set down and where's the

excitement?



HI: Yeah Glen, I guess that's it.



GLEN: Okay! That's the disease, but there is a cure.



HI: Yeah?



GLEN: Sure; Doctor Glen is tellin' ya you can heal

thyself.



HI: What do I gotta do?



GLEN: Well you just gotta broaden your mind a little

bit. I mean say I asked you, what do you think about

Dot?



HI (puzzled): Fine woman you got there.



GLEN is eyeing him shrewdly.



GLEN: Okay. Now it might not look like it, but lemme

tell you something: She's a helicat.



HI: That right?



GLEN: T-I-G-E-R.



HI: But what's that got to do with-



GLEN: Don't rush me!



He stops walking. Hi stops also, looking at GLEN, Still

puzzled. GLEN lays a companionable hand on his shoulder.



...Now the thing about Dot is, she thinks-and she's

told me this-



He looks around as if to make sure they are not being

overheard. His tone is confidential.



... she thinks ... you're cute.



Hi looks suspiciously at GLEN's hand on his shoulder.



HI: ... Yeah. . . ?



GLEN nods energetically:



GLEN: I'm crappin' you negafive! And I could say the

same about Ed!



Through tightly clenched teeth:



HI: What're you talkin' about, Glen?



GLEN: What'm I talkin' about?! I'm talkin' about sex,

boy! What the hell're you talkin' about?! You know,

"L'amour"?! I'm talkin' me'n Dot are Swingers! As in "to

Swing"! Wife-swappin'! What they call nowadays Open

Marriage!



Beaming, he takes his hand off Hi's shoulder and spreads his

arms.



GLEN: I'm talkin' about the Sex Revolution! I'm talkin'

about-

[Vaevictis]

Thanks for reminding me why I quit Boy Scouts.

Catholic Priest joke in 3... 2... 1...

[MamaMia]

My husband and I are into the 3 decade mark now and there have been 2 things that I can think of which have remained consistent from the beginning until this very day. :)
1) We never raise your voices to one another and...
2) We always have sex if he kisses the back of my neck.

[OCUDad]

The 30-year mark is a few weeks away for me and Mrs. Dad. I hate to get all serious and ****, but: that "for better, for worse" part is really important. Try to remember you married the other person for who they are, not what you hoped they'd become, or what you could change them into.

[OCUDad]

We always have sex if he kisses the back of my neck.Hey, does that work for other guys, too, or just Mr. Mia? :D

[Mjcpr]

Hey, does that work for other guys, too, or just Mr. Mia? :D

You could try it I guess, but I bet a lot of those necks are going to be hairy.

[Okla-homey]

Four words:

"Do whatever she says."

It's worked for 25 years for me.

[olevetonahill]

My husband and I are into the 3 decade mark now and there have been 2 things that I can think of which have remained consistent from the beginning until this very day. :)
1) We never raise your voices to one another and...
2) We always have sex if he kisses the back of my neck.
Youd have a PERMANET hicky if you were Mine
The lucky guy !

[OCUDad]

You could try it I guess, but I bet a lot of those necks are going to be hairy.Voice of experience...

[soonerhubs]

I say make sure that you make the strongest efforts to create as many pleasant memories as possible early on.

One of my favorite things to do with my wife of only 5 years is say... "Remember when we were at Disneyland together?" or "I'll never forget when we both first went to Yellowstone."

[Oldnslo]

The Wife Unit and I are nearing 20 years. Here's how we do it:

She's got a really bad memory. And I don't hear so good.

[Ike]

Pick your battles.

It really isn't worth going 30 rounds over whether or not the bathroom will be painted pink....and if you do wind up going 30 rounds over the color of the bathroom, the best way to get out of the doghouse when you lose is to do the painting yourself.

Sometimes you gotta have fights. Make sure those fights are about things that matter, and never, ever end those fights by "agreeing to disagree". Find a compromise that you each can live with. The stuff that doesn't matter, it's fine to agree to disagree.

Also, make sure you both get on the same page about what matters and what doesn't.

[soonerboomer93]

Stock up on coffee filters.

If you start finding dead hookers lying around, don't complain (nag) about it. He'll bury them in the basement soon enough, he's very busy.


but more importantly

"the family that slays together, stays together"

[OKC-SLC]

Gunplay is not always contraindicated.

[picasso]

on the argument deal. don't bring it up a day or so later and laugh at her about it.

just sayin.:D

[OUTromBoNado]

FYI, Soonerdood is the Best Man, and I'm one of the groomsmen.


buttsecks - lots of it.

Fixed.

[GottaHavePride]

Piece of advice #1:

don't schedule a wedding on big XII tournament weekend. ;)

[Big Red Ron]

No matter how tired or stressed or distacted you may feel at the time, if your spouse want's some seccs. Do it and do it well or you will be sorry.

And I'm talking to you men folk.
;)
Just sayin...

[1stTimeCaller]

never go to bed angry. If you're both angry at bedtime, one of you should sleep in a vehicle the other one bought.

;)

[proud gonzo]

always follow all unsolicited advice from people on teh innerwebs. no matter what.

[AlbqSooner]

When somebody posts a thread seeking advice for how to get on with your life after divorce, PM me, that is a subject on which I could have some meaningful input.

[SoonerStormchaser]

I learned this one quickly...

when she bitches about her job, she's not expecting you to solve it for her...she just needs to vent. So just shut up, listen, and console her afterwards.

[soonerboomer93]

posting nekkid honeymoon pics of your wife = good thing

















































for the S.O. pervs

[OUAndy1807]

don't listen to any of the crap above, then do the following:

1) when you feel yourself getting annoyed by them all the time, head off the upcoming fight at the pass. bring it to a head.
2) when you fight, go for the knockout punch early and often. I'm talking going way overboard. They'll either get ridiculously mad and leave or will start laughing and it will be over.
3) keep a personal journal of the things that you do for your spouse and the things you let them get away with. This information will come in very handy when you get into a fight and can't remember all the details that you want to throw in their face. Don't be afraid to consult the book during the fight if you need to.
4) make sure that they remember that you're marrying them for what they are now, and that any big physical changes may result in you no longer loving them. this includes changes in weight, hair style/color, etc...
5) when you sit down to go over your budgets, make sure to have your respective allowances representative of your income level. It's not fair for one of you to bring home more money and not get to spend more of the discresionary income.
6) when you're feeling bad, go out and buy something, even if you can't afford it right now. the worse you feel at the time, the bigger the purchase. remember, you might just barely be able to afford that motorcycle now, but it'll get easier when you get those raises you'll be getting in the future.
7) remember: if it happens in the kitchen, it's the woman's responsibility. if it happens in the garage, it's the man's responsibility
8) 6 months of mowing the lawn is worth all 12 months of cleaning the house. one of you mows, one of you cleans
9) now that you're officially grown ups, you both should get grown up cars. one of you should buy the biggest SUV you can find and the other should get a Lincoln town car. you can't get a grown up job without a grown up car.
10) buy a house in the same neighborhood as your parents. again, you're grown up now, you can afford it.

[MamaMia]

Hey, does that work for other guys, too, or just Mr. Mia? :D
Hes all I can handle, however there is this sexy rancher that keeps flirting with me down at the Atwood's. :P


Youd have a PERMANET hicky if you were Mine
The lucky guy ! A "hicky?" :D
olevet, thank you dear, but please keep in mind that there is a big difference between sucking and kissing. ;)

[Newbomb Turk]

please keep in mind that there is a big difference between sucking and kissing.

:hot:

[NormanPride]

Thanks, guys! I'm going to go with pg on this one; she seems like a smart cookie. :D

[LilSooner]

don't listen to any of the crap above, then do the following:

1) when you feel yourself getting annoyed by them all the time, head off the upcoming fight at the pass. bring it to a head.
2) when you fight, go for the knockout punch early and often. I'm talking going way overboard. They'll either get ridiculously mad and leave or will start laughing and it will be over.
3) keep a personal journal of the things that you do for your spouse and the things you let them get away with. This information will come in very handy when you get into a fight and can't remember all the details that you want to throw in their face. Don't be afraid to consult the book during the fight if you need to.
4) make sure that they remember that you're marrying them for what they are now, and that any big physical changes may result in you no longer loving them. this includes changes in weight, hair style/color, etc...
5) when you sit down to go over your budgets, make sure to have your respective allowances representative of your income level. It's not fair for one of you to bring home more money and not get to spend more of the discresionary income.
6) when you're feeling bad, go out and buy something, even if you can't afford it right now. the worse you feel at the time, the bigger the purchase. remember, you might just barely be able to afford that motorcycle now, but it'll get easier when you get those raises you'll be getting in the future.
7) remember: if it happens in the kitchen, it's the woman's responsibility. if it happens in the garage, it's the man's responsibility
8) 6 months of mowing the lawn is worth all 12 months of cleaning the house. one of you mows, one of you cleans
9) now that you're officially grown ups, you both should get grown up cars. one of you should buy the biggest SUV you can find and the other should get a Lincoln town car. you can't get a grown up job without a grown up car.
10) buy a house in the same neighborhood as your parents. again, you're grown up now, you can afford it.



Your wife is a freaking saint. I am soooo glad that I am not marrying a dude like you. You would have already been disposed of in the woods.

[sanantoniosooner]

Thanks, guys! I'm going to go with pg on this one; she seems like a smart cookie. :D
yeah, marital advice from the single.

Next you can take some parental advice from the childless.

Perhaps move on to any kind of advice from sic'em

;)

[NormanPride]

yeah, marital advice from the single.

Next you can take some parental advice from the childless.

Perhaps move on to any kind of advice from sic'em

;)

I frequently give child-rearing advice, and we're not gonna have chillun for a few years. ;)

[sanantoniosooner]

I frequently give child-rearing advice, and we're not gonna have chillun for a few years. ;)
Then you should obviously be seeking birth control advice from Shawn Kemp.

[SoonerJack]

I learned this one quickly...

when she bitches about her job, she's not expecting you to solve it for her...she just needs to vent. So just shut up, listen, and console her afterwards.

Ding ding ding. We have a winner.:)

[SoonerStormchaser]

Yah...and I have to deal with that on the phone every freaking day cause I live in one spot and she lives in Norman...


Oh well...

[Viking Kitten]

Don't be a selfish a**. If you realize you are being a selfish a**, stop it.

Expect that your partner not be a selfish a** either.

[SoonerStormchaser]

Details? What has Czar done now?

[Viking Kitten]

Details? What has Czar done now?

Well... last time we went knee to knee in the marital counselor's office, I confessed, "Czar, I don't think it's fair that you get the dead hookers all to yourself all the time. Maybe I'd like a dead hooker to play with every now and again. Did you ever think about that, huh Czar? Did you? WHAT ABOUT ME??? WHAT ABOUT MY NEEDS???"

Then we both wept. Then we went and bought a dry erase board so we could post a schedule establishing dead hooker time for both of us.

It was a very productive session.

[slickdawg]

Well... last time we went knee to knee in the marital counselor's office, I confessed, "Czar, I don't think it's fair that you get the dead hookers all to yourself all the time. Maybe I'd like a dead hooker to play with every now and again. Did you ever think about that, huh Czar? Did you? WHAT ABOUT ME??? WHAT ABOUT MY NEEDS???"

Then we both wept. Then we went and bought a dry erase board so we could post a schedule establishing dead hooker time for both of us.

It was a very productive session.

Afterwards, we went and picked up a couple of dead hookers so we could each have one to enjoy.


That's a touching story.

[1stTimeCaller]

I'd go with Andy's advice. There's some good life advice in there too that applies to single folks as well.

[C&CDean]

Well... last time we went knee to knee in the marital counselor's office, I confessed, "Czar, I don't think it's fair that you get the dead hookers all to yourself all the time. Maybe I'd like a dead hooker to play with every now and again. Did you ever think about that, huh Czar? Did you? WHAT ABOUT ME??? WHAT ABOUT MY NEEDS???"

Then we both wept. Then we went and bought a dry erase board so we could post a schedule establishing dead hooker time for both of us.

It was a very productive session.
As long as it's clearly established that you are the one who cooks them and flushes the rest of the carcass down the disposal, and he's the one who cleans up the car then you're gonna be golden.

[Octavian]

Married people seem to lament their single life a lot.


It doesn't sound that cool

[badger]

thank you for the advice, guys. because you were all so nice, here is one picture from the wedding. i don't feel guilty about posting it, because i didn't take it and its on facebook, anyways

(but if NP doesn't like it, I'll take it down)
http://photos-655.ak.facebook.com/ip002/v63/66/85/9607170/n9607170_33289655_6896.jpg

[SicEmBaylor]

Did you have a man or traditional maid of honor?

[badger]

Did you have a man or traditional maid of honor?
SoonerDood was the BEST man. I also had a maid of honor.

[Big Red Ron]

Married people seem to lament their single life a lot.


It doesn't sound that coolI don't. 'Course, I have a red hot smokin' wife that makes as much money as I do, so I may be in the minority.

;)

[olevetonahill]

Great Pic . the Bride is beautiful the groom not so much .
Good luck you two. and may you have a long, happy and prosperous Life together .

[Big Red Ron]

I don't. 'Course, I have a red hot smokin' wife that makes as much money as I do, so I may be in the minority.

;)Oh, and she also want's to get some tatoos. who haw!