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usmc-sooner
1/31/2007, 02:28 PM
Students were assigned to read two books, "Titanic" and "My Life",
by Bill Clinton.

One smart-*** student turned in the following book report, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories. His professor had a sense of humor and gave the student an A+ for his report:

Titanic: $29.99
Clinton: $29.99

Titanic: Over three hours to read
Clinton: Over three hours to read

Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and
subsequent catastrophe.
Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

Titanic: Jack is a starving artist.
Clinto n: Bill is a bull**** artist.

Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
Clinton: Ditto for Bill.

Titanic: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
Clinton: Ditto for Monica.

Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit.
Clinton: Let's not go there.

Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
Clinton: Monica is forced to return her gifts.

Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
Clinton: Clinton doesn't remember jack.

Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
Clinton: Monica... ooh, let's not go there either.

Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death.
Clinton: Bill goes home to Hillary... basically the same thing.

OhU1
1/31/2007, 02:37 PM
One smart-*** student turned in the following book report, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories. His professor had a sense of humor and gave the student an A+ for his report:

This sounds like the yarn about the Philosophy test where the only question was 'Why?" and the smart-guy writes "Why not?" and gets an A+.

FaninAma
1/31/2007, 03:03 PM
Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
Clinton: Monica... ooh, let's not go there either.

Reminds me of the book Harry Pooper and the Goblet of Goo. It topped all of the best seller lists in Austin.

Viking Kitten
1/31/2007, 03:47 PM
Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
Clinton: Monica... ooh, let's not go there either.



That one made me laugh. I probably would have laughed harder in 1998, but I laughed nonetheless. And hey, I'm sure we could find some funny Harry Truman jokes 'round the Web if we looked hard enough.;)

jacru
1/31/2007, 04:01 PM
Bill Clinton has his legacy whether he likes it or not.

picasso
1/31/2007, 07:58 PM
Bill Clinton has his hootchie mammas whether you like it or not.

so true. and I cannot blame ole Bubba.

Collier11
1/31/2007, 08:36 PM
so true. and I cannot blame ole Bubba.



Have you seen Monica?

picasso
1/31/2007, 10:26 PM
Have you seen Monica?
yeah and I'd hit her closer to one beer as opposed to Hillary which would take me just past 23 pints and her knocking on my bedroom window.

Collier11
1/31/2007, 10:32 PM
quick, janet reno or hillary...go!

OUinFLA
1/31/2007, 10:42 PM
Im gonna be ill.

Sooner in Tampa
2/1/2007, 06:55 AM
quick, janet reno or hillary...go!celibacy

SoonerTerry
2/1/2007, 07:31 AM
quick, janet reno or hillary...go!

I'll take quick;)

Collier11
2/1/2007, 11:42 AM
Hey Terry, is that the Uncle from Fresh Prince of Bel-Aire in your avatar? ;)