personal ads...

[fadada1]

nothing like telling it like it is:

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=6592990

[Viking Kitten]

"Eager-to-please woman, 36, seeks domineering man to take advantage of her flagging confidence. Tell me I'm pretty, then watch me cling."

[homerSimpsonsBrain]

Bastard. Complete and utter. Whatever you do, don't reply -- you'll only regret it.

And I dont even remember placing the ad ...

[Viking Kitten]

"7 million is good for me. Most days though I plateau at around 3 million. Any advances? Man with low sperm count (35 -- that's my age) seeks woman in no hurry to see the zygotes divide."

[Viking Kitten]

"Save it. Anything you've got to say can be said to my lawyer. But if you're not my ex-wife, why not write to box no. 5377? I enjoy vodka, canasta, evenings in, and cold, cold revenge."

[Jerk]

Sinister-looking man with a face that only a mother would love: think of an ageing Portillo with a beard and you have my better-looking twin. Sweetie at heart, though. Nice conversation, great for dimly-lit romantic meals. Better in those Welsh villages where the electricity supply can't be guaranteed. Charitable women to 50 appreciated. Box no. 0364.

[Sooner in Tampa]

That's it...talk dirty :P

"Your stars for today: A pretty Cancerian, 35, will cook you a lovely meal, caress your hair softly, then squeeze every damn penny from your adulterous bank account before slashing the tyres of your Beamer. Let that serve as a warning. Now then, risotto?"