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View Full Version : I got a phone call at 11:30 friday night...


proud gonzo
10/8/2006, 12:09 PM
...from an Oklahoma number.

Me: "Hello?"
caller: "HELLOOOOOO?"
Me: "Hello? Can you hear me?"
caller: "HELLOOOOOOO??"
Me: "Yes, Hello. I can hear you, dude."
caller: *beeping noises as he mashes buttons on his phone*
Me: "ok, you're mashing buttons on your phone. Are you drunk?"
*click* caller hangs up on me.


It was :dolemite:

no joke.
Flagstaffsooner
10/8/2006, 12:35 PM
...from an Oklahoma number.

Me: "Hello?"
caller: "HELLOOOOOO?"
Me: "Hello? Can you hear me?"
caller:"HELLOOOOOOO??"
Me: "Yes, Hello. I can hear you, dude."
caller: *beeping noises as he mashes buttons on his phone*
Me: "ok, you're mashing buttons on your phone. Are you drunk?"
*click* caller hangs up on me.


It was :dolemite:

no joke.Sorry, I was trying to order a pizza.
ultimatesooner1
10/8/2006, 12:48 PM
PIMP

CALL
dolemitesooner
10/8/2006, 05:55 PM
I couldn't hear..and I was beyond drunk...I went to some GILF bar that had one dollar drafts and it was drunky town heading into the west end very quickly
soonerboomer93
10/8/2006, 06:14 PM
:dolemite: is making booty calls to PG?

does Frozen know, he's gonna be so mad.

:pop:
mdklatt
10/8/2006, 06:55 PM
GILF bar

Guys/gays or grandmothers? :eek:
mdklatt
10/8/2006, 07:02 PM
My phone number is one digit off from Kongo's phone number. Friday and Saturday nights after 11 pm suck.

Hmmm...I need to make lemonade out of that lemon and start answering the phone as Kongo's. I'm sure that would be an endless source of entertainment.

"Thank you for calling Kongo's."

"Hey, I'm looking for my girlfriend."

"I'll check. What's she look like?"

"Brunette, 5'8"

"Yeah, there's somebody here that matches that description. Does your girlfriend like to French guys she just met with her hand down their pants when she gets drunk?"
yermom
10/8/2006, 07:06 PM
Guys/gays or grandmothers? :eek:

http://img179.imageshack.us/img179/889/btgilfgallery298ci8.jpg (http://imageshack.us)
OCUDad
10/8/2006, 07:10 PM
Goats?
49r
10/9/2006, 03:09 PM
Gouda???


cheese****er :mad:
The
10/9/2006, 03:31 PM
Gungan?
http://z.about.com/d/scifi/1/0/t/b/JAR-JAR.jpg
Quillo
10/9/2006, 11:15 PM
They definitely were grandmothers, and they definitely liked Dolemite. I hear that old people can't see very well.
dolemitesooner
10/9/2006, 11:20 PM
They definitely were grandmothers, and they definitely liked Dolemite. I hear that old people can't see very well.
**** YOU PRICK:D
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 08:34 AM
I got doleo's mobile number.

I think I'll send him some texts today in dolemite-ese...:mack:
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 09:51 AM
Okay - the more I think about this the funnier it is to me.

What should the first one say?

f*** yo couch?
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 09:55 AM
Heh.
Mjcpr
10/10/2006, 09:56 AM
BRJ?
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 09:56 AM
He just replied:

who is this
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 09:57 AM
BRJ?

What?

Are you even listening?

Edit: Oh...I get it now. Heh.
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 10:04 AM
I told him I was his secret admirer.

He replied:

Wtf

I just asked him when we were gonna go out again...hee hee...
Howzit
10/10/2006, 10:08 AM
Tell him he can't play poker for ****.
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 10:11 AM
He said:

I have no idea who this


I said:

R U wearing overalls?
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 10:13 AM
He said:

Who this is is damn its too early for there games

I said:

It's not early for u to suck at poker
Howzit
10/10/2006, 10:13 AM
ask him if he needs a bottle opened.
1stTimeCaller
10/10/2006, 10:14 AM
<laughing out loud>
1stTimeCaller
10/10/2006, 10:14 AM
<laughing out loud>
yermom
10/10/2006, 10:14 AM
ask him if he needs a ride ;)
Howzit
10/10/2006, 10:15 AM
so, then, you're a homo?
1stTimeCaller
10/10/2006, 10:16 AM
I hate you
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 10:18 AM
I said:

U need a ride?

And he said:

Ok wtf? Overalls

So I said:

U need a ride in your overalls?

I'm dying here...
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 10:21 AM
Uh oh - he's on now.

:les: BUSTED!!!
Howzit
10/10/2006, 10:21 AM
EDIT!!! EDIT!!!
Howzit
10/10/2006, 10:22 AM
dolemitesooner (http://www.soonerfans.com/forums/member.php?u=39605) Viewing Thread
I got a phone call at 11:30 friday night... (http://www.soonerfans.com/forums/showthread.php?t=80104)
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 10:23 AM
He just said:

Whoever this is you suck

:D
dolemitesooner
10/10/2006, 10:26 AM
YEAH **** YOU GUYS
dolemitesooner
10/10/2006, 10:27 AM
I AM HAVING A BAD ****ING DAY
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 10:28 AM
Heh.
dolemitesooner
10/10/2006, 10:28 AM
I GOT YOUR NUMBER NOW BEONCYE
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 10:29 AM
Oh

crap.
colleyvillesooner
10/10/2006, 10:33 AM
Backfire.
sanantoniosooner
10/10/2006, 10:35 AM
Now I'm laughing.
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 10:40 AM
I AM HAVING A BAD ****ING DAY

Tell us about your morning, beyonce.
Scott D
10/10/2006, 11:52 AM
oh man....rootbeer flying thread.
proud gonzo
10/10/2006, 12:01 PM
this is frickin funny
dolemitesooner
10/10/2006, 12:25 PM
Well ****,

I wake this mouring and I get ready for work. Everthing at this momnet in time is going as planned. I grap my undershirt, socks, and keys (This is all I need for work because I droped my clothes off to be dry-cleaned before I left for Texas, so all my cloths are at work) and headout to my car. I start my car and I realize that I have not graped my dress shoes. I run back in the house grap my shoes. When I come back outside the my P.O.S. car is not running.

I yell"WTF"

So I get in my car and its starts right back up then dies. I try this one or more times then realize somthing is wrong. GAY.!!!!!!!!! So then I get under the hood in the ****ing rain for about 15 minutes and realize I have no ****ing idea what the problem is.

So who do I call?

I call yermom to come pick my *** up and take me to work.

He arrives and drives me to work as we enter the gates I see that I dont have my postal Id. ****!!!! So I have to sign in.

I clock in and sign in. I thne go and pick up my dry cleaning. Thnak goodness it was there. So I go to the locker room to change. I get my clothes on and I go to put on my socks and I find that I have grapped one black and one blue. ****. I put on said mismatched socks and then I go to waRsh my hands(Thats waRsh not wash bitches) I now see that I have not shaven all of my face this mourning so I go and by a razor for $10.50 (**** thats alot) and shave what I missed. (thanks for telling I didnt shave all of my face yermom you fag *** beoncye.)

Then as I am walking to my office I see Dean say whats up he asks me about Texas and I just shake my head. I then receive a Text message that says **** yOUR cOUCH.

WTF

this is a gay *** day. and I still have to get my car towedd find a way home and make it to the Hornets game tonight.

God does the hate of me.
Howzit
10/10/2006, 12:32 PM
Were you wearing overalls?
sooner_born_1960
10/10/2006, 12:32 PM
Could someone please conjugate the verb "grap" for me?
dolemitesooner
10/10/2006, 12:33 PM
Could someone please conjugate the verb "grap" for me?
i WILL CONJUgate that **** for you
dolemitesooner
10/10/2006, 12:34 PM
Were you wearing overalls?
no and what the **** does htis have to do with overalls
yermom
10/10/2006, 01:15 PM
Well ****,

I wake this mouring and I get ready for work. Everthing at this momnet in time is going as planned. I grap my undershirt, socks, and keys (This is all I need for work because I droped my clothes off to be dry-cleaned before I left for Texas, so all my cloths are at work) and headout to my car. I start my car and I realize that I have not graped my dress shoes. I run back in the house grap my shoes. When I come back outside the my P.O.S. car is not running.

I yell"WTF"

So I get in my car and its starts right back up then dies. I try this one or more times then realize somthing is wrong. GAY.!!!!!!!!! So then I get under the hood in the ****ing rain for about 15 minutes and realize I have no ****ing idea what the problem is.

So who do I call?

I call yermom to come pick my *** up and take me to work.

He arrives and drives me to work as we enter the gates I see that I dont have my postal Id. ****!!!! So I have to sign in.

I clock in and sign in. I thne go and pick up my dry cleaning. Thnak goodness it was there. So I go to the locker room to change. I get my clothes on and I go to put on my socks and I find that I have grapped one black and one blue. ****. I put on said mismatched socks and then I go to waRsh my hands(Thats waRsh not wash bitches) I now see that I have not shaven all of my face this mourning so I go and by a razor for $10.50 (**** thats alot) and shave what I missed. (thanks for telling I didnt shave all of my face yermom you fag *** beoncye.)

Then as I am walking to my office I see Dean say whats up he asks me about Texas and I just shake my head. I then receive a Text message that says **** yOUR cOUCH.

WTF

this is a gay *** day. and I still have to get my car towedd find a way home and make it to the Hornets game tonight.

God does the hate of me.

i try not to look at your face too closely
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 01:32 PM
Man, I'm lucky to be a part of that story.

I wish I could spek myself.
Howzit
10/10/2006, 01:33 PM
Has doleo called yet?
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 01:40 PM
Not yet.

Think he lost his phone in one of the many pockets in his overalls?
yermom
10/10/2006, 01:41 PM
the overalls thing is killing me, i hope this sticks
Mjcpr
10/10/2006, 01:45 PM
Can someone explain the overalls thing please?
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 01:52 PM
Can someone explain the overalls thing please?

You succ at hillbilly.
dolemitesooner
10/10/2006, 02:02 PM
You succ at hillbilly.
lol:D
Chuck Bao
10/10/2006, 02:02 PM
Gay *** day indeed, a pimp wouldn't be having all these problems...
dolemitesooner
10/10/2006, 02:46 PM
I told you guys the pimp was dead
1stTimeCaller
10/10/2006, 02:50 PM
he's now a farmer that wears overalls
Scott D
10/10/2006, 02:51 PM
**** yo couch huggybear.
dolemitesooner
10/10/2006, 03:02 PM
he's now a farmer that wears overalls
**** you I aint no hillbille
yermom
10/10/2006, 04:50 PM
heh, it gets better

his power is out now
Viking Kitten
10/10/2006, 04:56 PM
It's hard out here for an ex-pimp.
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 04:58 PM
Pimps with no hoes cain't pay their light bill, yo...
Viking Kitten
10/10/2006, 05:03 PM
He can always go into acting like Ice T did.
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 05:09 PM
Think I should text him again? You know - so his phone would light-up so he could see in his dark house?

How about 'f*ck yo lights'?
mdklatt
10/10/2006, 05:14 PM
Think I should text him again? You know - so his phone would light-up so he could see in his dark house?

How about 'f*ck yo lights'?

:les: DO IT!
yermom
10/10/2006, 05:15 PM
yes!
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 05:23 PM
I said:

f*cK y0 LiGhTs!!!

He said:

Gawd damn it


:D
Sooner_Bob
10/10/2006, 05:24 PM
Remind me to never give you guys my cell #.
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 05:27 PM
He just sent this:

Worst day evar


Poor doleo...
BlondeSoonerGirl
10/10/2006, 05:32 PM
I told him to hang in there and he said:

Yeah i am about to go to the hornets game then if i get home and my $hit aint on i might kill an og&e worker


Heh.
mdklatt
10/10/2006, 05:36 PM
Yeah i am about to go to the hornets game


Is he going to walk?
GottaHavePride
10/10/2006, 06:07 PM
Holy cow this thread keeps getting funnier.
Rogue
10/10/2006, 07:20 PM
It's hard out here for an ex-pimp.
:D :D :D
proud gonzo
10/10/2006, 08:09 PM
ever start typing a post, realize it'll be taken the wrong way, add something to clarify, and end up having to delete the entire damn post?
sanantoniosooner
10/10/2006, 08:10 PM
ever start typing a post, realize it'll be taken the wrong way, add something to clarify, and end up having to delete the entire damn post?
constantly.

And since you see the crap that I do post, you can realize how bad the other stuff must be.
1stTimeCaller
10/10/2006, 08:12 PM
hey dolio, sell those tickets so you can pay the 'lectric bill.

YWIA

;)
soonerboomer93
10/10/2006, 08:14 PM
oh, this is just classic