PDA

View Full Version : Finally, I've Got A Neighbor Story


SoonerBorn68
9/20/2006, 10:21 PM
...and, here's the warning--If you have a problem with "adult toys" move on...this thread is not for you.

There's a guy who lived about 5 lots down that is a monk...honestly, he's got the haircut & wears the robes. I always thought he was kind of a nut, but hey, to each his own. The other night, at his house, was an ambulance, a fire truck, & mulitiple police cars. The dude had got an "adult toy" stuck in a private area & couldn't get it out. He had tried to drive himself to the emergency room but passed out on the front lawn. A kid found him & the police were called. The paramedics put a smelling salt under his nose & when he started coughing the "adult toy" shot out!

They took him to the hosipital for a couple of hours & he had moved out before dawn. :D
Blue
9/20/2006, 10:25 PM
"You aint ever gonna believe this doc..."

"Room 4, Tyler..."

http://img.snlarc.jt.org/arc/char/ChPa-Tyler.jpg
proud gonzo
9/20/2006, 10:28 PM
oh wow.

LOL
colleyvillesooner
9/20/2006, 10:41 PM
That's awesome.
Sooner Born Sooner Bred
9/20/2006, 10:43 PM
What kind of toy was it?
usmc-sooner
9/20/2006, 10:48 PM
What kind of toy was it?

how many can there be :D
Ike
9/20/2006, 10:50 PM
as soon as I saw the title of this thread, I knew it couldn't be good....



nobody ever tells good neighbor stories.
OCUDad
9/20/2006, 11:15 PM
So THIS is what they mean by "monkey love"?
Howzit
9/21/2006, 06:41 AM
You live by picasso?
Taxman71
9/21/2006, 06:44 AM
It was a million to one shot doc, million to one.
Howzit
9/21/2006, 06:45 AM
He'll probably tell everyone how he hit a one in hole.
Sooner in Tampa
9/21/2006, 07:12 AM
What kind of toy was it?It matters??? :confused: :P ;)


:pop: :pop: :pop: :pop:
Sooner in Tampa
9/21/2006, 07:14 AM
There's a guy who lived about 5 lots down that is a monk...honestly, he's got the haircut & wears the robes. I always thought he was kind of a nut, but hey, to each his own. The other night, at his house, was an ambulance, a fire truck, & mulitiple police cars. The dude had got an "adult toy" stuck in a private area & couldn't get it out. He had tried to drive himself to the emergency room but passed out on the front lawn. A kid found him & the police were called. The paramedics put a smelling salt under his nose & when he started coughing the "adult toy" shot out!

They took him to the hosipital for a couple of hours & he had moved out before dawn. :DHaven't you hear that new song??

"It's hard out here for a monk ???"

:D
crawfish
9/21/2006, 07:17 AM
You sure he wasn't a druid?
sanantoniosooner
9/21/2006, 07:33 AM
Does the vow of celebacy include anything about kinky stuff?
GottaHavePride
9/21/2006, 08:21 AM
So I said to Walter, "dude, why are you buying ANOTHER cat? You're just going to get it stuck up your *** again." And he said "Well, how else am I supposed to get the hamster out?"
VeeJay
9/21/2006, 08:36 AM
It's State Fair time in many places. Many State Fairs have Liar's contests.

I remember a contest winner in my native Mississippi once told a tale of chinch bugs that had taken over and formed a circle around his house. Chinch bugs in their huge numbers have been known to alter their surroundingss with their burrowings and shifting of the soil.

This liar said he had left town for a few weeks and when he returned home, his house was facing west where, previously, it faced east.

At any rate, the monk story is good for a laugh.

Is there a newspaper link? There should be!
Chuck Bao
9/21/2006, 09:28 AM
Smelling salt? Okay, I'll try that next time.
GDC
9/21/2006, 09:32 AM
One time my neighbor was working on his truck and he had to drain the fuel lines, so he had a small open container of gas sitting by where he was working. His dog came over and unknown to my neighbor drank some of it. The dog took off and ran around the house a few times, and then just fell over.
KsSooner
9/21/2006, 11:33 AM
yep, it ran out of gas.
Oldnslo
9/21/2006, 02:57 PM
monk-y shines?
ousoonerfan
9/21/2006, 03:23 PM
You sure he wasn't a druid?


He didn't look druish.:D
GDC
9/21/2006, 03:49 PM
One time that same neighbor's dog swallowed a very valuable antique coin, so he gave him a bottle of castor oil and locked him up in the garage overnight. Next morning the garage was knee-deep in dog ****, and the dog was sitting on the steps, wagging his tail.
tulsaoilerfan
9/21/2006, 03:59 PM
That's hilarious, true or otherwise
GDC
9/21/2006, 04:01 PM
That's hilarious, true or otherwise

THe worst part was, he couldn't pass it, because it was counterfeit.
LilSooner
9/21/2006, 05:35 PM
I've got some fun ones that I heard in a certain western OK doctor lounge one day.


So this guy comes to the ER because he "accidently" sat on his tv remote control.

Another guy came in after having the um, toy lodged for a couple of days. He waited for the wife to leave town and came in with the girlfriend.
BoogercountySooner
9/21/2006, 07:25 PM
This wasn't a Mathis Brother monk was it?
Rogue
9/21/2006, 07:38 PM
Ambulances at the neighbor's place. Last summer s'posedly one of our neighbors electrocuted himself with some sort of homemade "adult toy" contraption.
Taxman71
9/22/2006, 06:46 AM
This wasn't a Mathis Brother monk was it?

Too easy.
Okla-homey
9/22/2006, 07:01 AM
http://img212.imageshack.us/img212/9972/zzzzzzzzzzzmonkthelonuniquethe101bds1.jpg (http://imageshack.us)