New Clock Rules (email to Ty Halpin, NCAA Football Rules Committee Liaison)

[okienole3]

An email that my buddy sent.

Dear Ty,
I am a rabid college football fan and, as such, I am disgusted by the new rule 3-2-5e. Why on God's green earth would you shorten the game that so many of us put on the same level of importance as Jesus Christ and the Second Amendment? You're depriving us of about 18 plays per game. That adds up to like 200 plays per season. Do you know how many games that adds up to? It's like three games. Your organization's stupid rule took three games worth of football away from us. THREE GAMES. Honestly it's like taking away Christmas. Does the NCAA hate Christmas, Ty? I hope not. Do you know what else? You may also have managed to take the single-season rush record away from Adrian Peterson. As a Sooner fan I find that despicable. Please let the powers that be know that I cannot fathom a single respectable reason to leave this rule on the books.
Thanks for your time,
xxx

[BigUgly]

An email I sent:

Dear Ty,

You suck.

Yours in Utter Disgust,

BigUgly

[Hatfield]

Dear Ty,

why do you hate underdogs, and drama?

die,

hatfield

[Miko]

Dear Ty,
I am a rabid college football fan and, as such, I am disgusted by the new rule 3-2-5e. Why on God's green earth would you shorten the game that so many of us put on the same level of importance as Jesus Christ and the Second Amendment? You're depriving us of about 18 plays per game. That adds up to like 200 plays per season. Do you know how many games that adds up to? It's like three games. Your organization's stupid rule took three games worth of football away from us. THREE GAMES. Honestly it's like taking away Christmas. Does the NCAA hate Christmas, Ty? I hope not. Do you know what else? You may also have managed to take the single-season rush record away from Adrian Peterson. As a Sooner fan I find that despicable. Please let the powers that be know that I cannot fathom a single respectable reason to leave this rule on the books.
Thanks for your time,
xxx





Dear XXX,

Yes, we at the National Communists Against Athletes have a long-standing hatred of Christmas, Jesus, the Second Ammendment and the Oklahoma Sooners.

Don't even get me started on Mom and Apple Pie!!

Thank you for your correspondence and your continued support of our corporate sponsors.

Eat (censored), and die, f'n hillbilly!

Your friend,

Ty



:cool:

[Pricetag]

He's too busy reading the Arena Football rule book for ideas for next season to respond to any of this stuff. They'll be running the clock after incomplete passes next year.

[daddywarbucks]

I hope he gets a sour dough yeast infection from his old lady.

In the words of Johhny Carson " may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your pubick hair"

or
" may a yak squat on your face"

either should be video taped and shown before each college game