sooneriniowa
8/16/2006, 05:34 AM
http://chicagosports.chicagotribune.com/sports/football/bears/cs-060815bears,1,1256907.story?coll=cs-bears-headlines
'Tommie' set to turn play up a notch
Bears defensive lineman, recently feeling he lost his drive, wants to start writing his legacy
By John Mullin
Tribune staff reporter
August 16, 2006, 12:32 AM CDT
BOURBONNAIS -- Late last season, Tommie Harris looked at the jersey hanging in his locker and said, "When I'm here, I'm [number] '91.' But the rest of the time, I'm 'Tommie.'"
Early this month "Tommie" says he was ready to walk away from his NFL Pro Bowl career.
Tommie had passion; 91 did not.
"Two weeks ago I was thinking about quitting," Harris said. "I was wondering what was wrong with me, why I didn't have the drive anymore. I talked to my Mom and said, 'I don't know if I want to do this. The love of the game is not there.'"
It is easy for football enthusiasm to wane in training camp. But Harris' unhappiness appeared to run considerably deeper and his talks with his mother and others close to him may have done more than save his career.
Surprisingly, the honors and recognition heaped on Harris last season—voted to the Pro Bowl in his second season and acclaimed as one of the best young defensive linemen in the game—didn't seem satisfying.
For all of his success, he believes he was holding back, reluctant to face the risk of a total commitment to the game.
"It's almost like I'm afraid to be great," Harris said. "Because if I show you greatness, then I'm going to have to be that on a consistent basis. I look at Brian Urlacher. Everybody knows he's great, so if he doesn't show up on one game, everybody sees that. The levels are high as far as what people expect.
"But now I feel there's no turning back. I've made up my mind—and this is just recently—to go for broke. I've never really opened myself up to something like this before. My fear is failure. Now I'm going to see how good I can do for the first time in my life.
"I know how good I am but being a man means being good consistently. This is the first time in my life I've told myself I want to see if I can be the best. I finally want to see how good Tommie Harris can be, if that means every day in practice going hard, just everything."
Harris is not defined solely by football. Indeed, his biggest challenge is the conflict inherent in being "91" and "Tommie."
He is a devout Christian, whose duet with Carolina Panthers tight end Michael Gaines at the 2006 Super Bowl Gospel Fest in Detroit drew a standing ovation on a program that included gospel legends Patti LaBelle and the Winans family. He traveled to Liberia in May and spent a couple of weeks with Oklahoma and NFL players Lee Roy and Dewey Selmon doing construction work on an orphanage for "Mama Feeta," whose heroism saved the lives of dozens of children amid the civil war there in the late 1990s.
And he is intent on doing his own work with children. Among his efforts is a planned book "The Scenic Route," detailing parts of his life and how he overcame doubters. Those included some of his pre-teen teachers, one of whom sent him to the school psychologist. It was a visit that changed his life.
"I used to act crazy because I just wanted attention," Harris recalled. "The teachers gave up on me learning and they would put me in a corner. I would talk crazy to myself. When I was sent to see the [psychologist], I sat perfectly straight and answered 'yes, ma'am, no ma'am.'
"But she knew what I was doing, the games kids like me play. And she told me to keep believing in myself, and she wrote to my mom. 'This kid is more than normal.' She saw things in me.
"All it would have taken was for her to have said I was crazy and I was finished. So I knew I had to be perfect. I went through that book of all those shapes and where people say they see demons or whatever. I was seeing bunny rabbits, flowers. And I was serious."
Those experiences are behind him. It is the ones in front of him that have his interest as never before, certainly the ones involving football.
"Now I feel it's time for me to start my greatness, my legacy, like Urlacher," Harris said. "Now I'm building to show everybody — and myself — Tommie Harris can be a great football player. I want to make my game perfect, to perfect my craft, and that's on and off the field."
He hesitated, then added, "I want to be the most elite person I can be. Put my all into all of this."
'Tommie' set to turn play up a notch
Bears defensive lineman, recently feeling he lost his drive, wants to start writing his legacy
By John Mullin
Tribune staff reporter
August 16, 2006, 12:32 AM CDT
BOURBONNAIS -- Late last season, Tommie Harris looked at the jersey hanging in his locker and said, "When I'm here, I'm [number] '91.' But the rest of the time, I'm 'Tommie.'"
Early this month "Tommie" says he was ready to walk away from his NFL Pro Bowl career.
Tommie had passion; 91 did not.
"Two weeks ago I was thinking about quitting," Harris said. "I was wondering what was wrong with me, why I didn't have the drive anymore. I talked to my Mom and said, 'I don't know if I want to do this. The love of the game is not there.'"
It is easy for football enthusiasm to wane in training camp. But Harris' unhappiness appeared to run considerably deeper and his talks with his mother and others close to him may have done more than save his career.
Surprisingly, the honors and recognition heaped on Harris last season—voted to the Pro Bowl in his second season and acclaimed as one of the best young defensive linemen in the game—didn't seem satisfying.
For all of his success, he believes he was holding back, reluctant to face the risk of a total commitment to the game.
"It's almost like I'm afraid to be great," Harris said. "Because if I show you greatness, then I'm going to have to be that on a consistent basis. I look at Brian Urlacher. Everybody knows he's great, so if he doesn't show up on one game, everybody sees that. The levels are high as far as what people expect.
"But now I feel there's no turning back. I've made up my mind—and this is just recently—to go for broke. I've never really opened myself up to something like this before. My fear is failure. Now I'm going to see how good I can do for the first time in my life.
"I know how good I am but being a man means being good consistently. This is the first time in my life I've told myself I want to see if I can be the best. I finally want to see how good Tommie Harris can be, if that means every day in practice going hard, just everything."
Harris is not defined solely by football. Indeed, his biggest challenge is the conflict inherent in being "91" and "Tommie."
He is a devout Christian, whose duet with Carolina Panthers tight end Michael Gaines at the 2006 Super Bowl Gospel Fest in Detroit drew a standing ovation on a program that included gospel legends Patti LaBelle and the Winans family. He traveled to Liberia in May and spent a couple of weeks with Oklahoma and NFL players Lee Roy and Dewey Selmon doing construction work on an orphanage for "Mama Feeta," whose heroism saved the lives of dozens of children amid the civil war there in the late 1990s.
And he is intent on doing his own work with children. Among his efforts is a planned book "The Scenic Route," detailing parts of his life and how he overcame doubters. Those included some of his pre-teen teachers, one of whom sent him to the school psychologist. It was a visit that changed his life.
"I used to act crazy because I just wanted attention," Harris recalled. "The teachers gave up on me learning and they would put me in a corner. I would talk crazy to myself. When I was sent to see the [psychologist], I sat perfectly straight and answered 'yes, ma'am, no ma'am.'
"But she knew what I was doing, the games kids like me play. And she told me to keep believing in myself, and she wrote to my mom. 'This kid is more than normal.' She saw things in me.
"All it would have taken was for her to have said I was crazy and I was finished. So I knew I had to be perfect. I went through that book of all those shapes and where people say they see demons or whatever. I was seeing bunny rabbits, flowers. And I was serious."
Those experiences are behind him. It is the ones in front of him that have his interest as never before, certainly the ones involving football.
"Now I feel it's time for me to start my greatness, my legacy, like Urlacher," Harris said. "Now I'm building to show everybody — and myself — Tommie Harris can be a great football player. I want to make my game perfect, to perfect my craft, and that's on and off the field."
He hesitated, then added, "I want to be the most elite person I can be. Put my all into all of this."