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8/4/2006, 09:59 AM
Happy Friday...
source: AAS (http://www.statesman.com/news/content/news/stories/local/08/4kelso.html)
COMMENTARY: JOHN KELSO http://img.coxnewsweb.com/C/03/47/59/image_1859473.jpg
Bomar's good-bye is worth a laugh to us Longhorns
Friday, August 04, 2006
Yeah, I know. I should be feeling large, gooey gobs of sorry for Rhett Bomar, the kid who got kicked off the Oklahoma football team.
And I shouldn't be joking about it. I shouldn't be saying that instead of Boomer Sooner, the expression should be changed to Bomar No Longer Sooner.
But I just can't control myself. So the good news out of Oklahoma for folks around here — if good news and Oklahoma can be used accurately in the same sentence — is that the OU starting quarterback has been given the old heave ho from the squad.
The reason it's fantastic that Bomar has been shown the big red door is that it'll make it that much easier for Texas to kick Mobilehoma's butt in October. Besides, Bomar left Grand Prairie to play UP THERE. So, at the risk of sounding juvenile, let me just add this philosophical footnote: hah hah hah, hee hee hee hee hee.
Actually, I have a warm spot in my heart for Oklahoma, since it lends itself to comedy. For example, this guy goes to the doctor, who tells him he has six months to live. So he asks the doctor for advice. "Get a Dodge truck, marry a 300-pound woman, and move to Oklahoma," the doctor says.
"Will this make me live longer?" the guy asks. "No, but it'll sure seem like it," the doctor replies.
Incidentally, there's a MySpace.com page claiming to be Bomar's own space, where under "Rhett's Blurbs" it says, "Hello my name is Rhett im sure you have heard of me." Of course we've heard of you. You're the clown who got kicked off the football team for workin' at a car dealership.
You've got to laugh at the reason Bomar got pitched from the team — work, or a lack thereof. See, ESPN.com reported that Bomar worked about five hours a week at a Norman car dealership called Big Red Sports/Imports and that he claimed on his taxes that he made $18,000 a year.
Some people might find that a little high on the pay scale, if Bomar was in fact making $18,000 a year for working five hours a week. But when you amortize it out to a 40-hour-a-week work schedule, that comes out to a meager $144,000 a year.
Heck, when Barry Switzer was the Oklahoma coach, he would have marched over to the dealership and demanded they give the kid a raise and a free convertible.
By the way, Big Red Sports/Imports is a Kia dealership. You'd think the quarterback could rate a job kicking tires at a Hummer joint.
Oh, also on MySpace, "Rhett's Interests" include "taking the sooners back to the national championship game and winning it." Funny. There's nothing that mentions him taking a hike.
Still, Rhett Bomar could be the new working man's hero. Americans work too many hours. Here's a kid who was showing us the way by emptying the dealership wastebaskets or whatever for just an hour a day or so. So we ought to give him a plaque.
But the real reason we ought to hammer out some kind of award for him is that his absence has left Chokelahoma holding the football bag. Besides, why should we waste our sympathy on him? He'll probably end up playing for the Oakland Raiders.
John Kelso's column appears on Sundays, Tuesdays and Fridays. Contact him at 445-3606 or [email protected].
source: AAS (http://www.statesman.com/news/content/news/stories/local/08/4kelso.html)
COMMENTARY: JOHN KELSO http://img.coxnewsweb.com/C/03/47/59/image_1859473.jpg
Bomar's good-bye is worth a laugh to us Longhorns
Friday, August 04, 2006
Yeah, I know. I should be feeling large, gooey gobs of sorry for Rhett Bomar, the kid who got kicked off the Oklahoma football team.
And I shouldn't be joking about it. I shouldn't be saying that instead of Boomer Sooner, the expression should be changed to Bomar No Longer Sooner.
But I just can't control myself. So the good news out of Oklahoma for folks around here — if good news and Oklahoma can be used accurately in the same sentence — is that the OU starting quarterback has been given the old heave ho from the squad.
The reason it's fantastic that Bomar has been shown the big red door is that it'll make it that much easier for Texas to kick Mobilehoma's butt in October. Besides, Bomar left Grand Prairie to play UP THERE. So, at the risk of sounding juvenile, let me just add this philosophical footnote: hah hah hah, hee hee hee hee hee.
Actually, I have a warm spot in my heart for Oklahoma, since it lends itself to comedy. For example, this guy goes to the doctor, who tells him he has six months to live. So he asks the doctor for advice. "Get a Dodge truck, marry a 300-pound woman, and move to Oklahoma," the doctor says.
"Will this make me live longer?" the guy asks. "No, but it'll sure seem like it," the doctor replies.
Incidentally, there's a MySpace.com page claiming to be Bomar's own space, where under "Rhett's Blurbs" it says, "Hello my name is Rhett im sure you have heard of me." Of course we've heard of you. You're the clown who got kicked off the football team for workin' at a car dealership.
You've got to laugh at the reason Bomar got pitched from the team — work, or a lack thereof. See, ESPN.com reported that Bomar worked about five hours a week at a Norman car dealership called Big Red Sports/Imports and that he claimed on his taxes that he made $18,000 a year.
Some people might find that a little high on the pay scale, if Bomar was in fact making $18,000 a year for working five hours a week. But when you amortize it out to a 40-hour-a-week work schedule, that comes out to a meager $144,000 a year.
Heck, when Barry Switzer was the Oklahoma coach, he would have marched over to the dealership and demanded they give the kid a raise and a free convertible.
By the way, Big Red Sports/Imports is a Kia dealership. You'd think the quarterback could rate a job kicking tires at a Hummer joint.
Oh, also on MySpace, "Rhett's Interests" include "taking the sooners back to the national championship game and winning it." Funny. There's nothing that mentions him taking a hike.
Still, Rhett Bomar could be the new working man's hero. Americans work too many hours. Here's a kid who was showing us the way by emptying the dealership wastebaskets or whatever for just an hour a day or so. So we ought to give him a plaque.
But the real reason we ought to hammer out some kind of award for him is that his absence has left Chokelahoma holding the football bag. Besides, why should we waste our sympathy on him? He'll probably end up playing for the Oakland Raiders.
John Kelso's column appears on Sundays, Tuesdays and Fridays. Contact him at 445-3606 or [email protected].