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View Full Version : JOTD, cause Im bored.



OUinFLA
6/19/2006, 11:22 PM
#1

A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and
was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license.
She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
"What does it look like? She finally asked.
The policewoman replied "It's square and it has your picture on it."
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and
handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is," she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay,
you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."

#2

blond driver
As a blonde crawls out of her wrecked car, the local sheriff asks her what happened.......

The blonde began,"It was the strangest thing!!!! I looked up and saw a tree, so i swerved to the right. Then i saw another tree, so i swerved to the left. Then there was another tree, and another, and another....................."

The sheriff thought for a minute and then said," mam.........I don't know how to tell you this ,but the only thing even resembling a tree on this road for thirty miles is your air freshener."

yermom
6/19/2006, 11:33 PM
#1

A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and
was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license.
She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
"What does it look like? She finally asked.
The policewoman replied "It's square and it has your picture on it."
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and
handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is," she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay,
you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."



dang crooked cops

critical_phil
6/19/2006, 11:47 PM
A doctor and a lawyer in two cars collided on a country road.

The lawyer, seeing that the doctor was a little shaken up, helped him from the car and offered him a drink from his hip flask.

The doctor accepted and handed the flask back to the lawyer, who closed it and put it away. "Aren't you going to have a drink yourself?" asked the doctor.

"Sure, after the police leave," replied the lawyer.

olevetonahill
6/20/2006, 01:46 AM
A blond in each front seat = dual air bags

Sooner in Tampa
6/20/2006, 05:33 AM
Young David came home from school one day and found his pet chicken laying on the ground with his legs pointing straight up into the sky. When his father got home, he explained that the chicken has died and his legs were pointed up to Jesus in heaven.

They buried the chicken and that was that. Two weeks later his dad came home from work and David ran up to him yelling, "Daddy, Daddy, we nearly lost Mommy today."

"What?" his father replied.

"When I got home from school, Mommy was laying on the bed with her legs pointing up in the air yelling, 'Jesus, I'm coming, Jesus I'm coming.' If it wasn't for Uncle Terry holding her down we would have lost her for sure!"


"Thanks...I'll be here all week, try the veal"

Sooner in Tampa
6/20/2006, 05:42 AM
After a long night of making love, he notices a photo of another
man on her night stand by the bed. He begins to worry.
"Is this your husband?" he nervously asks.
No, silly," she replies, snuggling up to him.
"Your boyfriend, then?" he continues.
"No, not at all," she says, nibbling away at his ear.
"Is it your dad or your brother?" he inquires, hoping to be reassured.
"No, no, no!!!" she answers.

"Well, who in the hell is he, then?" he demands.
"That's me before the surgery."

BudSooner
6/20/2006, 07:14 AM
:mack: :mack:
After a long night of making love, he notices a photo of another
man on her night stand by the bed. He begins to worry.
"Is this your husband?" he nervously asks.
No, silly," she replies, snuggling up to him.
"Your boyfriend, then?" he continues.
"No, not at all," she says, nibbling away at his ear.
"Is it your dad or your brother?" he inquires, hoping to be reassured.
"No, no, no!!!" she answers.

"Well, who in the hell is he, then?" he demands.
"That's me before the surgery.":mack: