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StoopTroup
5/20/2006, 08:57 AM
Officer, Somebody Stole My Gal

Man tells cops his Jenna Haze blow-up doll vanished into black hole

MAY 17--An Iowa man impervious to embarrassment called cops this week to report the theft of a blow-up fashioned to resemble a porn star. According to a Council Bluffs Police Department report (a copy of which you can find below), Trenton Camacho called cops Monday night to report that a "Priority US Mail package" containing his "Jenna Haze Love Doll" had been opened and that the plastic plaything was missing. The box had been left in the common hallway of the apartment complex where the 21-year-old Camacho resides. In a TSG interview, Camacho said that he purchased the $32 item after receiving an e-mail solicitation and did not plan on replacing the stolen goods. Camacho added that he had not previously ordered any blow-up dolls and was not certain what he was going to do with the life-size replica of the popular Haze, who's starred in films like "Big Bottom Sadie" and "Phuk Factor" and was named "Best New Starlet" at the 2003 Adult Video News awards. Online ads describe the Haze doll (click here to see its package) as having "soft, perky breasts" and "sexy silkscreen crotchless panties & she has the tightest holes."

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0517061haze1.html

dolemitesooner
5/20/2006, 09:17 AM
The man just wants his ladie back. I would be ****ed if my lady freind got stolen too

fadada1
5/20/2006, 09:21 AM
very subtle with the changing of the font color. good thinking by the guy.... i never buy loose blow-up dolls either.

AlbqSooner
5/20/2006, 10:30 AM
One year while preparing for the Super Bowl in New Orleans, John Matusak was spotted in a French Quarter club sitting at a table with a blow-up doll as his "escort". Due to his size and testy demeanor, no one commented to him.

Oh, the doll was dressed in a mini skirt and tank top. I mean Tuz was not a pervert or anything.

mdklatt
5/20/2006, 10:59 AM
According to a Council Bluffs Police Department report...

Council Bluffs is a suburb of Omaha. That guy is a Bugeater for sure.

Flagstaffsooner
5/20/2006, 11:25 AM
I bet he bit her on the a$$ and she farted and flew out the window.