Learn sumthin' everyday

[Okla-homey]

Ever wondered why human babies come out so helpless? Think about it, lots of other mammals have babies which can stand, walk or swim right off the bat.

How come ours are just goo sacks for the first year?

Its the old pelvic canal's fault. See, we're bi-peds. In order for a woman's anatomy to permit her to stand and walk upright without pain, her hips can only be a certain width.

In fact, if a woman's hips got much wider, her knee joints would shred even more than they do now (women experience a substantially higher rate of torn ACL's than d00ds) because the mechanics of supporting her body's weight would induce catastrophic side loads on her knees.

See our feet need to track pretty close together in order to be an efficient bi-ped. To run on two legs, our feet need to strike within an couple inches of a straight line. The resulting upside-down triangle formed by knees at the bottom and hips at the top just barely works for women (mechanically-speaking.) Wider hips = disaster for upright walking over a woman's lifetime.

Anyhoo, since the pelvic canal can only be so wide before profoundly affecting bi-pedalism, our babies have to be born before they get too big to fit through there.

The result is human infants which are goo sacks the first year of life while most other mammal babies can walk alongside their quadraped mamas very soon after they're born. The difference is, quadrapeds' pelvises can be as wide as they need to be to allow developmentally advanced babies to slide through without impacting ambulation. Cool huh?

http://img509.imageshack.us/img509/9546/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz12.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

[OUinFLA]

It's the introduction to welfare..... you know ....just showing the n00bs that they really don't have to do anything on their own to get by.

I blame the dems.

[SicEmBaylor]

That pic is going to haunt me tonight.

[OUinFLA]

That's cool Homey, I didnt realize that babies come out with that note pad rack attached to their head.
No wonder women scream so loud.

[Okla-homey]

That's cool Homey, I didnt realize that babies come out with that note pad rack attached to their head.
No wonder women scream so loud.

There are more graphic images available via GIS, but I figgered that one would illustrate w/o getting me banned.;)

[IB4OU2]

Nine months trying to get out of one, the rest of our lives trying to get back in another.....

[scaldeddawg]

That pic is going to haunt me tonight.

Me too. Those yellow/gold eyes spook me.

My ex-wife had hips wide enough to birth small cattle. Hook 'em

[Okla-homey]

Me too. Those yellow/gold eyes spook me.

My ex-wife had hips wide enough to birth small cattle. Hook 'em

Then I reckon she'll end up on the DL sooner or later with blown knees.:O

[OUinFLA]

why does that one only have three fingers on it's hand?

[BajaOklahoma]

I'm more worried about the baby's color. The APGAR is going to be low and the risk of brain damage is higher.

[TheHumanAlphabet]

http://img509.imageshack.us/img509/9546/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz12.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

Turn that baby around and you have Mrs. THA coming into the world. We are ALWAYS given the pleasure of Mr. THA's MIL describe the child birth experience whenever we speak of Mrs. THA's childhood...

[OUinFLA]

on further inspection, I see no reason to be concerned with this woman's knees..................she has no legs!

[Okla-homey]

Turn that baby around and you have Mrs. THA coming into the world. We are ALWAYS given the pleasure of Mr. THA's MIL describe the child birth experience whenever we speak of Mrs. THA's childhood...

Remember that "Wichita" scene from the Thanksgiving classic "Planes, Trains and Automobiles?"

Don't worry about her. She's tough. Her first baby come out sideways and she dint scream or nuthin'

[TheHumanAlphabet]

Remember that "Wichita" scene from the Thanksgiving classic "Planes, Trains and Automobiles?"

Don't worry about her. She's tough. Her first baby come out sideways and she dint scream or nuthin'

Yep! To hear my MIL (who BTW I jokingly say has no pain receptors as the pain tolerance in that family lineage is amazing) say it, she was wanting some pain killers, but they wouldn't give her anything as they were afraid that Mrs. THA was in distress. Mrs. THA jokes that she knew what it was like on the outside and was digging her heals into the brith canal as she wasn't ready to come out...;)

[sooneron]

What a trooper!

[Okla-homey]

Yep! To hear my MIL (who BTW I jokingly say has no pain receptors as the pain tolerance in that family lineage is amazing) say it, she was wanting some pain killers, but they wouldn't give her anything as they were afraid that Mrs. THA was in distress. Mrs. THA jokes that she knew what it was like on the outside and was digging her heals into the brith canal as she wasn't ready to come out...;)

Hat's off to women. Like some wag said somewhere, if men had to labor and deliver babies, the human race would have died out long ago.

[picasso]

i was born with a full set of teeth.

[olevetonahill]

Ever wondered why human babies come out so helpless? Think about it, lots of other mammals have babies which can stand, walk or swim right off the bat.

How come ours are just goo sacks for the first year?

Its the old pelvic canal's fault. See, we're bi-peds. In order for a woman's anatomy to permit her to stand and walk upright without pain, her hips can only be a certain width.

In fact, if a woman's hips got much wider, her knee joints would shred even more than they do now (women experience a substantially higher rate of torn ACL's than d00ds) because the mechanics of supporting her body's weight would induce catastrophic side loads on her knees.

See our feet need to track pretty close together in order to be an efficient bi-ped. To run on two legs, our feet need to strike within an couple inches of a straight line. The resulting upside-down triangle formed by knees at the bottom and hips at the top just barely works for women (mechanically-speaking.) Wider hips = disaster for upright walking over a woman's lifetime.

Anyhoo, since the pelvic canal can only be so wide before profoundly affecting bi-pedalism, our babies have to be born before they get too big to fit through there.

The result is human infants which are goo sacks the first year of life while most other mammal babies can walk alongside their quadraped mamas very soon after they're born. The difference is, quadrapeds' pelvises can be as wide as they need to be to allow developmentally advanced babies to slide through without impacting ambulation. Cool huh?

http://img509.imageshack.us/img509/9546/zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz12.jpg (http://imageshack.us)
Is this birthing kinda like one of those slow movin pizza ovens ? you know where the kid gets done as it passes thru ?

[SicEmBaylor]

My mom had no intention of going through the pain so she wimped out and went with a c-section.

[OKC-SLC]

why does that one only have three fingers on it's hand?
thalidomide?

[picasso]

my folks found me under a rock.

[SicEmBaylor]

my folks found me under a rock.
You're an :texan: Aggie?

[Jimminy Crimson]

i was born with a full set of teeth.

He cut his own umbilical cord.
...also performed his own circumcision!

:norm:

[picasso]

He cut his own umbilical cord.
...also performed his own circumcision!

:norm:
leave it on there, let him dream for a little while!


she was born without a tongue, Clark.