View Full Version : I Couldn't Make This Up
Viking Kitten
5/5/2006, 12:47 PM
My employer is hosting teachers from all over the U.S. for a conference thingy next week. I am working on a program for their banquet, to include the names of all the visiting teachers. I am currently working on adding some biographical information for a teacher by the name of...
Kittie Hair.
I swear to God.
I bet the boys don't like her very much.
The French would.
Maybe Colorado fans too.
Petro-Sooner
5/5/2006, 12:49 PM
I can see the possibilites with this one. HEH
BeetDigger
5/5/2006, 12:53 PM
There is nothing wrong with Kittie Hair. As long as she is neatly shorn that is. Perhaps you can introduce her to Brat's bush.
slickdawg
5/5/2006, 12:55 PM
There is nothing wrong with Kittie Hair. As long as she is neatly shorn that is. Perhaps you can introduce her to Brat's bush.
I doubt she could compare to brat's bush.
Partial Qualifier
5/5/2006, 12:58 PM
I haven't seen a woman's name that bad since Kacky Poarch.
Osce0la
5/5/2006, 01:20 PM
At the bank I used to work at we had a check come in for a person named Thongdy Thongrivong. I don't know if that's Vietnamese or what, but it had us cracking up for the rest of the week...
Osce0la
5/5/2006, 01:21 PM
Maybe Thongdy and Kittie should hook up, if they got married her name would be Kittie Hair Thongrivong.
slickdawg
5/5/2006, 01:22 PM
When I worked at the Sears Credit office and going to skool.....
Iwona Funderburke
We laughed forever at that one.
We have an entire list of funny/wacky names we've culled from the myriad criminal records we have to key. Just last night, I came across "Harry Beavers".
I sh*t you not.
Had a patient in rsidency whose first name was "Dorcus".
Had a patient in rsidency whose first name was "Dorcus".
Mrs Mj knows a Dorkus/Dorcus.
(No, it's not me.)
Mrs Mj knows a Dorkus/Dorcus.
(No, it's not me.)
That's not what she says.
BigRedJed
5/5/2006, 01:51 PM
That's not what she says.
Hee hee. That was funny because you made it sound like you knew Mrs. Mjcpr. But we all know that you really don't.
She just calls me 'whale penis'.
opksooner
5/5/2006, 01:55 PM
In high school: Helen Hoare.
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 03:14 PM
I've always thought 'Pat' was funny...
:les: PAT!!!
See?
BeetDigger
5/5/2006, 03:18 PM
She just calls me 'whale penis'.
Why, because she thinks you're a big ****? :D
slickdawg
5/5/2006, 03:19 PM
Why, because she thinks you're a big ****? :D
You have given out too much Reputation in the last 24 hours, try again later.
I've always thought 'Pat' was funny...
PAT!!!
See?
For some reason that was funny...
OKC Sooner
5/5/2006, 03:20 PM
In the Duncan phone book when I was going to high school, two listings for folks named Beer were immediately followed by a listing for someone named Belcher.
Why, because she thinks you have a big ****? :D
I think that's why, yeah.
Norm In Norman
5/5/2006, 03:24 PM
Justus Butts was a kid Mrs. Norm taught last year.
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 03:35 PM
Justus Butts was a kid Mrs. Norm taught last year.
'JB'...heh.
I used to work with a Chinese lady named 'Ingyrong'. It was pronounce 'in-yong'.
Back then, the Bullet Boys' song 'Smooth Up In Ya' was all over the radio.
Instead of 'SMOOTH UP IN YA' we liked to sing 'SMOOTH UP INGYRONG!'.
We were funny...:eddie:
We were funny...:eddie:
Why the change?
Beano's Fourth Chin
5/5/2006, 03:37 PM
My kindergarten teacher was Named Mrs. I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt
But it was hyphenated, right Bart?
n8v_ndn
5/5/2006, 03:38 PM
We used to get on conf calls with a guy by the name of Phat Doan. Given his accent, the calls usually started out with 'Hello, this is Fat Dong'.
Women in our room: 'How you doin?'
Guys: 'Dayum, playa'
--all on mute of course.
Condescending Sooner
5/5/2006, 03:39 PM
Reminds me, the auditor came in my office last week and handed me his business card before beginning the audit. His name (I s**t you not) is Richard Head. I couldn't even pay attention to the rest of his speil as questions and comments kept flooding my brain.
Women in our room: 'How you doin?'
Guys: 'Dayum, playa'
--all on mute of course.
Did you work at Jet?
Some were thinking I was "big a**" yesterday..... So I'm here to publicly apologize for being just that and this apology is directed particularly to Jed.
Btw- I used to know a Harold Butts in Norman I wonder if he was related to Justus?
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 03:43 PM
I know a Korean dude named 'Thong'....pronounced 'Tong'.
Getting a new receptionist around here is really, really funny.
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 03:47 PM
Why the change?
I needed to let people think you were funny...:twinkies:
n8v_ndn
5/5/2006, 03:49 PM
Did you work at Jet?
lol...a computer company. That's what contributed to the giggling in the room--it was funny to hear that from the people assembled. Sort of like those Poser Mobile characters.
jk the sooner fan
5/5/2006, 03:50 PM
i went to high school with "Holly Leaf"
and when stationed at Fort Hood, used to get my hair cut in one of those korean barber shops by a girl named "mi suk"
wierdest name i've ever seen on paper is "omaha nebraska peeples"
BigRedJed
5/5/2006, 03:58 PM
Some were thinking I was "big a**" yesterday..... So I'm here to publicly apologize for being just that and this is apology is directed particularly to Jed.
Btw- I used to know a Harold Butts in Norman I wonder if he was related to Justus?
Hey, I'm ready to chalk it up as just a bad day of posting on the SO, and I'm not much for holding grudges. I appreciate the apology. I know things are probably still a little close to the surface for you, but I'd like to talk to you offline when you feel like it, and let you know a few things about where I'm coming from. PM me when you feel like it.
slickdawg
5/5/2006, 04:08 PM
In 1991 or 92, the Jackson MS phonebook (distributed by Bellsouth)
had an entry for "Shi*head Jones" , pronounced shuteed, poor guy
had to change his number cause everyone kept calling him.
In 1991 or 92, the Jackson MS phonebook (distributed by Bellsouth)
had an entry for "Shi*head Jones" , pronounced shuteed, poor guy
had to change his number cause everyone kept calling him.
Do you know who the publisher was?
slickdawg
5/5/2006, 04:11 PM
Do you know who the publisher was?
It was the Bellsouth phonebook, so I'd believe it was them.
It was the Bellsouth phonebook, so I'd believe it was them.
Do you remember where it was filed, Dewey Decimaly?
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 04:12 PM
Do you remember where it was filed, Dewey Decimaly?
No name-calling, Pat.
slickdawg
5/5/2006, 04:13 PM
Do you remember where it was filed, Dewey Decimaly?
No idea.
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 04:19 PM
Okay, now this is funny.
Mjcpr is a jackass.
You tell him/her. :eddie:
You tell him/her. :eddie:
:D
Mrs. Norm
5/5/2006, 05:01 PM
When I worked in an office before teaching, we had a lady on our donation database whose name was Zarah Virgin. We always wanted to call her home and say, "Is Zarah Virgin there? Anywhere?" We would laugh forever anytime we came upon her name.
BigRedJed
5/5/2006, 05:32 PM
I went to school with a girl, last name of Dick, who's mom was named Anita. Try springing that on a bunch of fourth graders. It's a wonder we got any classwork done with all of the giggling.
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 05:33 PM
What was the girl's name?
BigRedJed
5/5/2006, 05:39 PM
Ivana.
Viking Kitten
5/5/2006, 05:45 PM
BSG makes a great straight man, doesn't she? :)
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 05:58 PM
:les: YOU WANNA FIND OUT?!!!!!!?
BigRedJed
5/5/2006, 06:05 PM
http://www.8secondchallenge.com/soonerfans/vk_bsg_drunk.jpg
Originally posted by Beano's Fourth Chin
My kindergarten teacher was Named Mrs. I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt.
Hey, I had that same teacher! Don't remember seeing you in class, though.
Went to high school with a girl named Judy Klod, for what that's worth.
...prolly not much.
BSG makes a great straight man, doesn't she? :)
It's the lack of tittays that does her in.
Norm In Norman
5/5/2006, 09:58 PM
Btw- I used to know a Harold Butts in Norman I wonder if he was related to Justus?
Well, she teaches in OKC but I guess they could be related. I can only assume the Butts she taught was dirt poor, so if Harold is dirt poor than he might be your man.
Norm In Norman
5/5/2006, 10:03 PM
Well, she teaches in OKC but I guess they could be related. I can only assume the Butts she taught was dirt poor, so if Harold is dirt poor than he might be your man.
In fact, I can only assume Mr. Butts is completely high or something to name his kid Justus Butts.
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 10:03 PM
You're drunk, aren't you?
Well, she teaches in OKC but I guess they could be related. I can only assume the Butts she taught was dirt poor, so if Harold is dirt poor than he might be your man.
Yep, Harry had a lot of family around there and they were salt of the earth.
Norm In Norman
5/5/2006, 10:23 PM
You're drunk, aren't you?
Lord I wish. The boy has a friend over for the WEEKEND. to top it off, I have to dog sit tomorrow too. The zoo tomorrow was going to be the part that saved me - except that it will probably rain all morning.
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 10:26 PM
I have to dog sit, too. By brother's going to Houston for a week and I'm watching his dog.
Oh, and have I mentioned that I have cats?
I should set up a webcam...this should be frockling crazy...
The zoo tomorrow was going to be the part that saved me - except that it will probably rain all morning.
yeah, but you get to see apes throw poo at each other. it all evens out in the end. You are "Even Steven"
Norm In Norman
5/5/2006, 10:37 PM
I have to dog sit, too. By brother's going to Houston for a week and I'm watching his dog.
Oh, and have I mentioned that I have cats?
I should set up a webcam...this should be frockling crazy...
The dog that I am watching is a shi-tzu. It is quite wimpy. Since my cat is similarly sized to it, the dog is deathly afraid of the cat. The cat knows this, so he spends 100% of his time stalking the dog. There is nothing worse than waking up at 3am to a dog yelping in terror because the cat attacked him in his sleep.
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 10:40 PM
The dog that I am watching is a shi-tzu. It is quite wimpy. Since my cat is similarly sized to it, the dog is deathly afraid of the cat. The cat knows this, so he spends 100% of his time stalking the dog. There is nothing worse than waking up at 3am to a dog yelping in terror because the cat attacked him in his sleep.
Which is exactly what I'm afraid of - the unsuspected cat attack. They already do it each other in the middle of the night - no telling what they'll do to that dog.
She's an older dog, too so she's slower. She basically has no chance of a peaceful night's sleep whatsoever.
Norm In Norman
5/5/2006, 10:48 PM
Some cat's kick ***. Mine play fights with my dog (a boston terrier for those who aren't keeping track) every day. I'd hate to see the cat that tangles with Spanky if he ever got out of the house.
Ironically, he usually greets people by rolling over on his back so you can scratch his gi-normous belly.
BlondeSoonerGirl
5/5/2006, 10:51 PM
One of mine is a priss-pot. She's 'my' cat. She's a tuxedo tabby (black and white) and just spoiled rotten.
The other's a hunter. She only comes in to eat and sleep. The rest of the time she's outside messing around.
You can guess which one attacks which. And it sounds AWFUL. Like one of them is killing the other. Not a good way to be woken up.
The blood-curdling yelpy screams this dog will make will not be good.
Sooner Born Sooner Bred
5/5/2006, 10:53 PM
I went to HS with a girl whose last name was Fuchs, pronounced Fox.
olevetonahill
5/5/2006, 11:04 PM
4 th grade teacher Mr Raiper :eek:
Chuck Bao
5/5/2006, 11:13 PM
At the bank I used to work at we had a check come in for a person named Thongdy Thongrivong. I don't know if that's Vietnamese or what, but it had us cracking up for the rest of the week...
I would guess the name is Thai and pronounced Tong-dee Tong-re-wong.
My best friend named his son Pipat (pronounced Pee-pot). And I can't help but call him Little Pipat.
Okla-homey
5/6/2006, 07:57 AM
Had a patient in rsidency whose first name was "Dorcus".
DUDE! I knew a girl in college named Dorcus Herring. Seriously. She was hawt! SC girl. She said that Dorcus name had been hung on women in her family for generations. She didn't mind it much. Charlestonians name their kids wierd stuff but it doesn't raise too many eyebrows since they've done it for centuries. They're also big on giving girls mama's maiden name for the babies' first name, e.g. Taylor Smith, Campbell Brown, Cooper Jones, etc.
Here's another wierdosity. My f-i-l was named Francis Faye Corbett. He was 6'3" and about 240. A real man's man. He went by "F.F." I also think he got in a lot of fights as a kid.
I also knew a guy named Evelyn.
slickdawg
5/6/2006, 08:00 AM
I went to HS with a girl whose last name was Fuchs, pronounced Fox.
La Tech had a kicker in the mid-90's, same name, same pronunciation.
BigRedJed
5/6/2006, 11:17 AM
"My name is Francis Faye! How do you do!"
BigRedJed
5/6/2006, 11:18 AM
http://www.realmagazine.com/new/graphics/cashfinger.jpg
I know a lady named Birdie Feathers.
I saw a werewolf with a Chinese menu in his hand
Walking through the streets of Soho in the rain
He was looking for a place called Lee Ho Fook's
Going to get a big dish of beef chow mein...
:D
jeremy885
5/6/2006, 11:37 AM
Had a bank customer named Richard Head.
BigRedJed
5/6/2006, 11:47 AM
Hee hee. http://www.richardhead.com/
Boarder
5/6/2006, 11:51 AM
There was this one football player named D'Brickashaw.
In HS, there was a teacher named Mrs. Hoar. She was an economics teacher. Her classroom was also right across from Mrs. Rack.
:D
I also knew a guy named Rabbit Hare.
Sooner_Bob
5/6/2006, 01:25 PM
You people and your weird names . . .
Boarder
5/6/2006, 02:11 PM
In HS, there was a teacher named Mrs. Hoar. She was an economics teacher. Her classroom was also right across from Mrs. Rack.
:D
Did she wear jeans?
My employer is hosting teachers from all over the U.S. for a conference thingy next week. I am working on a program for their banquet, to include the names of all the visiting teachers. I am currently working on adding some biographical information for a teacher by the name of...
Kittie Hair.
I swear to God.
I bet the boys don't like her very much.
Knew a Speech Pathologist named Bunny Hare who had a brother who free-lanced as a photographer in Tulsa. His name was Rabbit Hare. Had several pics picked up and credited by Tulsa paper in the 80's
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