Eavesdropping at the DPS

[Czar Soonerov]

Waiting rooms are always interesting, but the DPS is special I think. I sat next to this youngish couple, mid twenties with a cute 3-6 month old baby in a stroller next to them. Obviously the topic of conversation is the cute wittle baby who of course looks like his daddy. The conversation turns to the future height of the little bugger.

Momms: "Oh, he'll be short. everybody in my family is short."
Baby Daddy: "Nah, he'll be tall like my family."
Momms: "Well I think he'll be short."
Baby Daddy: "If he's short, he'll grow up with a Napoleon complex."
Momms: "What? He'll be a nerd like that guy in the movie."
Baby Daddy: "No, like the dictator."
Momms: "Who?"
Baby Daddy then explains who Napoleon is....

At this point I'm thinking no big deal. I've seen Jay Leno's "Jay Walking" segments, I know these people exist. And now for the reason for this thread.

So momms decides to change the subject, feeling dumb and all.

Momms: "Did I tell you about my next tattoo?"
Baby Daddy: "Nah."
Momms: "I'm getting my husbands name tattooed on my ring finger under my wedding band."
Baby Daddy: "You shouldn't get someones name tattoed on you. I know a lot of people with ex's names tattooed on them that wish they hadn't gotten it."
Momms: "But he is getting one too."
Baby Daddy: "Don't do it, you won't stay together."
Momms: "Why not?" (duh)
Baby Daddy: points at kid in stroller.

They called my name so that's all I got.

[Viking Kitten]

Now tell 'em why you were at the DPS, Czar!

[sanantoniosooner]

I hate stupid people.

[mdklatt]

Now tell 'em why you were at the DPS, Czar!

This thread is giving me a tingly feeling.

[Czar Soonerov]

Now tell 'em why you were at the DPS, Czar!

I like to go listen to the people talk. :O

[slickdawg]

Waiting rooms are always interesting, but the DPS is special I think. I sat next to this youngish couple, mid twenties with a cute 3-6 month old baby in a stroller next to them. Obviously the topic of conversation is the cute wittle baby who of course looks like his daddy. The conversation turns to the future height of the little bugger.

Momms: "Oh, he'll be short. everybody in my family is short."
Baby Daddy: "Nah, he'll be tall like my family."
Momms: "Well I think he'll be short."
Baby Daddy: "If he's short, he'll grow up with a Napoleon complex."
Momms: "What? He'll be a nerd like that guy in the movie."
Baby Daddy: "No, like the dictator."
Momms: "Who?"
Baby Daddy then explains who Napoleon is....

At this point I'm thinking no big deal. I've seen Jay Leno's "Jay Walking" segments, I know these people exist. And now for the reason for this thread.

So momms decides to change the subject, feeling dumb and all.

Momms: "Did I tell you about my next tattoo?"
Baby Daddy: "Nah."
Momms: "I'm getting my husbands name tattooed on my ring finger under my wedding band."
Baby Daddy: "You shouldn't get someones name tattoed on you. I know a lot of people with ex's names tattooed on them that wish they hadn't gotten it."
Momms: "But he is getting one too."
Baby Daddy: "Don't do it, you won't stay together."
Momms: "Why not?" (duh)
Baby Daddy: points at kid in stroller.

They called my name so that's all I got.

You sure you weren't in Mississippi?

[slickdawg]

Now tell 'em why you were at the DPS, Czar!


Well of course, inquiring minds want to know.

VK, do you need to sleep with the kids? :D

[Viking Kitten]

This thread ain't goin' out like that.

[ChickSoonerFan]

DPS? :confused:

I want to follow along but what is that? :O

[Sooner Born Sooner Bred]

Deposit Parcel for S

never mind

[slickdawg]

Department of Public Safety - likely for leadfoot Czar?

[BajaOklahoma]

Wouldn't a leadfoot end up at the city/county courts?
Replacing a diver's license, car tag? Expired?

[slickdawg]

Could have been for chasing that chicken across the road......

[Viking Kitten]

People! Forget about the damn DPS and read the story! MY HUSBAND TELLS GOOD STORIES!!!!!!1

I mean c'mon... The skank thought a Napolean complex meant he'd be a nerd like the guy in the movie. You can't make up stuff that good.

[bri]

But....you told him to tell us why he was there, thus triggering all the speculation.

[Viking Kitten]

I WAS DRUNK!

[slickdawg]

People! Forget about the damn DPS and read the story! MY HUSBAND TELLS GOOD STORIES!!!!!!1

I mean c'mon... The skank thought a Napolean complex meant he'd be a nerd like the guy in the movie. You can't make up stuff that good.

well yeah, but you said "tell 'em why you were there"


:D

[ChickSoonerFan]

He was there because you were drunk? :confused:





;)

[bri]

MOMMY DRINKS BECAUSE YOU CRY!!!!!!!

[Czar Soonerov]

I was renewing my license. 4 months late I might add.

:les:F**K YEAH!!!

[bri]

Wow, you're like a role model. Only, not.

[sanantoniosooner]

I was renewing my license. 4 months late I might add.

:les:F**K YEAH!!!
I'm so glad VK got you to spill the beans.

[mdklatt]

I was renewing my license. 4 months late I might add.



Well this thread was a huge disappointment. Which is a shame, because the DPS story alone was worthy.

[RacerX]

People! Forget about the damn DPS and read the story! MY HUSBAND TELLS GOOD STORIES!!!!!!1

I mean c'mon... The skank thought a Napolean complex meant he'd be a nerd like the guy in the movie. You can't make up stuff that good.

And the guy eaves dropping is shorter than me!!!!

[Viking Kitten]

The eavesdropping guy is the least Napoleanic guy I've ever met. He just has an inexplicable attraction to Amazonian women.:P

[Oldnslo]

I had such high hopes for this thread. Fizzle.

No, not in some Snoop kind of -izzle way. I mean the old-style fizzle. Like the really cool-looking expensive firework that you save for the very end of the 4th, and it turns out to be, like, a spark fountain that goes 2' high and snuffs out in 8 seconds.

Fizzle.

[yermom]

fizzle my bizzle

[Viking Kitten]

You want fireworks??? Fine. I'll give you fireworks.

The Momms in the story was me. Czar is only my baby daddy. Dean is my real husband and I have his name tattoed on my ***. We went to the DPS to commit identity theft by getting a fake I.D. with birth certificate I stole from a dead woman.

Actually she was dead because I killed her. With an extra large dose of meth I cooked up in my kitchen. While my kids watched.

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU PEOPLE WANT???

[OU Adonis]

MOMMY DRINKS BECAUSE YOU CRY!!!!!!!

Man, what movie was that from?

[Stanley1]

You want fireworks??? Fine. I'll give you fireworks.

The Momms in the story was me. Czar is only my baby daddy. Dean is my real husband and I have his name tattoed on my ***. We went to the DPS to commit identity theft by getting a fake I.D. with birth certificate I stole from a dead woman.

Actually she was dead because I killed her. With an extra large dose of meth I cooked up in my kitchen. While my kids watched.

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU PEOPLE WANT???

Wow. Thats F'd up.

[TexasLidig8r]

You want fireworks??? Fine. I'll give you fireworks.

The Momms in the story was me. Czar is only my baby daddy. Dean is my real husband and I have his name tattoed on my ***. We went to the DPS to commit identity theft by getting a fake I.D. with birth certificate I stole from a dead woman.

Actually she was dead because I killed her. With an extra large dose of meth I cooked up in my kitchen. While my kids watched.

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU PEOPLE WANT???

Everyone knows you go to the County Clerk's office for that document. :rolleyes:

[C&CDean]

You want fireworks??? Fine. I'll give you fireworks.

The Momms in the story was me. Czar is only my baby daddy. Dean is my real husband and I have his name tattoed on my ***. We went to the DPS to commit identity theft by getting a fake I.D. with birth certificate I stole from a dead woman.

Actually she was dead because I killed her. With an extra large dose of meth I cooked up in my kitchen. While my kids watched.

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU PEOPLE WANT???

This story is > the Napoleon story.

[BlondeSoonerGirl]

I'm gonna start following VK around with a camera.

Like, today.

[C&CDean]

If you get directly behind her, and she drops her britches you can capture this image:


(DE0AN)

[BlondeSoonerGirl]

And you can bet I'll post it, too.

Oh, and OMG...

[Viking Kitten]

If you get directly behind her, and she drops her britches you can capture this image:


(DE0AN)

Luckily, there's room for all caps. Big bold arial font too.

[12]

I married the wrong girl.

[NormanPride]

I don't know why, but this is now my sig.


I WAS DRUNK!

[Fugue]

Luckily, there's room for all caps. Big bold arial font too.

whatcha gonna do with all that junk...... :texan:

[NormanPride]

whatcha gonna do with all that junk...... :texan:

I hate you so much. Now I have to listen to "Bicycle Race" by Queen to get that damn song out of my head.

:les: BICYCLE! BICYCLE!

[Viking Kitten]

whatcha gonna do with all that junk...... :texan:

BASTARD!!!!!

Ima make make make make you drunk...

[sanantoniosooner]

BASTARD!!!!!

Ima make make make make you drunk...
it's get get get...........

AND I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS:mad:

[Fugue]

BASTARD!!!!!

Ima make make make make you drunk...

Hey, don't start no drama. :mad:

[NormanPride]

I think VK's avatar is a bad influence. What with all the yelling. Maybe Teutonic Titwillow was better. Twue?

[sanantoniosooner]

I think VK's avatar is a bad influence. What with all the yelling. Maybe Teutonic Titwillow was better. Twue?
actually it's one of my favorite avatar changes of all time.

I'm gonna spek spek spek spek her drunk for it.

[Viking Kitten]

I thought I would swip into something more... comfortabwe.

[Fugue]

actually it's one of my favorite avatar changes of all time.

I'm gonna spek spek spek spek her drunk for it.

I like it too, it has an :eddie: quality to it.

And he is is is is already drunk.

[Osce0la]

I hate you so much. Now I have to listen to "Bicycle Race" by Queen to get that damn song out of my head.

:les: BICYCLE! BICYCLE!

Bicycle Race??? If you're listening to Queen right now, why not "Fat Bottom Girls"???

(DE0 AN)

Just sayin...

[mdklatt]

Now I have to listen to "Bicycle Race" by Queen to get that damn song out of my head.

:les: BICYCLE! BICYCLE!

Bastard. :mad:

[NormanPride]

Bicycle Race??? If you're listening to Queen right now, why not "Fat Bottom Girls"???

(DE0 AN)

Just sayin...

VK, I think I'd take offense to this. Or do you make the rockin' world go 'round?

[Fugue]

VK, I think I'd take offense to this. Or do you make the rockin' world go 'round?

VK is swipping into something more comfortabwe. Let's see where that leads.

And, Czar's detective work is getting funnier the more I think about it.

[Viking Kitten]

VK, I think I'd take offense to this. Or do you make the rockin' world go 'round?

Well... if the more mass an object has causes a higher rate of acceleration due to gravity, then I guess the answer's yes.

[BlondeSoonerGirl]

*cough* BULL$HIT! *cough*

[NormanPride]

Well... if the more mass an object has causes a higher rate of acceleration due to gravity, then I guess the answer's yes.

I've given out way too much spek today.

[Fugue]

*cough* BULL$HIT! *cough*

13K Bravo!

[BlondeSoonerGirl]

Crap. I didn't even notice.

How sad.

[Viking Kitten]

*cough* BULL$HIT! *cough*

Hey now missy!

Some of us stopped passing notes in physics class long enough to actually learn something.

And it's a good thing I didn't go to high school with you because I'd a passed so many notes I'd be left behind reading at a fifth grade level. http://www.soonerfans.com/forums/images/icons/bush.gif

[BlondeSoonerGirl]

:dolemite:?

[skycat]

Well... if the more mass an object has causes a higher rate of acceleration due to gravity, then I guess the answer's yes.

It doesn't. But I think the answer is yes anyway.

[Fugue]

It doesn't. But I think the answer is yes anyway.

Bob Huggins could be the new :eddie: . He's working on the look already.

[Viking Kitten]

See? If BSG would stop passing me notes I woulda Googled a different Website that explained it better.

[BlondeSoonerGirl]

VK, will you go with me?

___ Yes

___ No

___ Maybe

[Viking Kitten]

BSG,

I think Fugue has a cute butt. Do you think he likes me?

[BlondeSoonerGirl]

VK,

Do you think Pat is really a boy or a girl?

*Giggle*

[Fugue]

BSG,

I think Fugue has a cute butt. Do you think he likes me?

Yes

Singed:
Love Drunk

[NormanPride]

I always wondered what all the girls in class s******ed about all the time. At one point, I considered it one of the great mysteries of the universe.

"Is Pat really a boy or a girl?"

Quite honestly, this is a let down.

[Viking Kitten]

BSG

I think Norman Pride is almost as cranky as Norm.

Do you think he likes me?

[skycat]

Bob Huggins could be the new :eddie: . He's working on the look already.

He's got a ways to go before he can match that frown. He does have an agreeably elastic chin though.

[Fugue]

He's got a ways to go before he can match that frown. He does have an agreeably elastic chin though.

and he can put the booze away too. I'm lookin' for great humor from BH. :)

[NormanPride]

BSG

I think Norman Pride is almost as cranky as Norm.

Do you think he likes me?

:norm:?

:(

[BlondeSoonerGirl]

VK,

Dean threw a rock at me during recess and hit me in the back of the head.

I'M IN LOVE!!!

[Viking Kitten]

BSG,

STEP OFF! DEAN'S MINE!

He said he was going to go to Nazarene Church Camp with me this summer.

[BeetDigger]

VK,

Dean threw a rock at me during recess and hit me in the back of the head.

I'M IN LOVE!!!



If you're lucky, he'll take you to see the horse and cow rotting away.

[Sooner Born Sooner Bred]

BSG,

STEP OFF! DEAN'S MINE!

He said he was going to go to Nazarene Church Camp with me this summer.Pop rocks anyone?

[Czar Soonerov]

I'm thinking about upping my subscription just so I can delete this thread. :mack:

[BlondeSoonerGirl]

VK,

The new boy keeps staring at you. I think he likes you!

[Sooner_Bob]

The one with the lazy eye?

[sanantoniosooner]

This thread started out interesting and faded to bolivia from there.

[Viking Kitten]

Your troll is a lot nicer than you.

[sanantoniosooner]

Your troll is a lot nicer than you.
Which one?

I have so many.

[Oldnslo]

See?

All you needed was a gentle shove in the proper direction. And now we have revealed the mysteries of middle-school girlie notes.

I should be secretary of state or something.

[slickdawg]

If you're lucky, he'll take you to see the horse and cow rotting away.


ROTFLMAO!