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View Full Version : Why Didn't the Cannibals Eat the Clown?



Pieces Hit
2/15/2006, 08:50 AM
They thought he might taste funny.

ChickSoonerFan
2/15/2006, 09:25 AM
huh.....never heard that one before. :rolleyes:


:D

SoonerBK
2/15/2006, 09:41 AM
A set of jumper cables walk into a bar and order a beer.

The bartender says "OK but don't start anything."

Mjcpr
2/15/2006, 09:44 AM
Wrong!!

Two cannibals were eating a clown.

One turns to the other and says, 'this taste funny to you?'

Pieces Hit
2/15/2006, 10:11 AM
Horse walks into a bar.
Bartender says, "Why the long face?''


It was new to me when I first heard it.

Mjcpr
2/15/2006, 10:13 AM
Horse walks into a bar.
Bartender says, "Why the long face?''

It was new to me when I first heard it.

You don't say?

:D

Pieces Hit
2/15/2006, 10:27 AM
Guy at a bar says "Gimme 3 more martinis!"
Stranger says, "Wow, what's the occasion?"
Guy says, "I'm celebrating my first blowjob!"
Stranger says, "Blowjobs are great!"
Guy says, "Yeah, but I just can't get the taste out of my mouth."

Vaevictis
2/15/2006, 12:37 PM
A priest, a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar

... and that was just the first guy!

mdklatt
2/15/2006, 12:39 PM
They thought he might taste funny.

Clowns are not funny.

NormanPride
2/15/2006, 12:40 PM
Seriously. What about a clown is funny? The fact that they wear f-ed up clothing and bowties? The fact that they wear makeup? That just sounds like Lid to me, and he's not funny at all.


;)

achiro
2/15/2006, 12:44 PM
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says , "I'll serve you but don't start anything."

Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt uner his arm and says:
"A beer please, and one for the road."

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other "Does this taste funny to you?"

"Doc. I can't stop singing ' The Green Green Grass of Home.'
"That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."
"Is it common?"
"Well, It's Not Unusual."

Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, " I was artificially inseminated this morning. " " I don't believe you," says Dolly.
"It's true no bull!" exclaims Daisy.

An invisible man marries and invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

I went to a seafood disco last week....and pulled a mussel.

Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says. "Dam!"

achiro
2/15/2006, 12:45 PM
A guy walks into a bar and sits down at the bar. He pulls out a cigarette and asks the bartender for a light. The bartender pulls this huge Bic lighter out from under the bar.
“Wow where the heck did you get that huge lighter?” asks the patron.
“Well.” Says the bartender. “We have a Jeanie here.”
“You got a Jeanie?” Says the guy.
“Yep” says the Bartender.
“Well will he give me a wish?” says the guy.
“Yep” says the Bartender. “He’s over there in that booth.”

So the fellow heads over and sits down across from the Jeanie.

“You really a Jeanie?”
“Yep”-Jeanie
“I can have any thing I want?”
“Yep”-Jeanie
“Okay I want a million bucks.” Says the guy.
“Okay” says the Jeanie and he snaps his fingers and there is a million ducks walking around. They are everywhere. All over the bar and floor, everywhere.
“What are you doing.” Says the guy. “I asked for a million bucks not a million ducks! “
“Well that is too bad.” Says the Jeanie. “You only get one wish.”
So the guy wanders back to the bar in disgust kicking ducks out of his way as he goes.
“Well.” Says the bartender. “I see you got a wish. I forgot to tell you this Jeanie is sort of hard of hearing. You don’t think I asked for big Bic do you.”

pb4ou
2/15/2006, 12:47 PM
Why don't chickens wear underware? Cause their pecker is on their head.

Vaevictis
2/15/2006, 01:01 PM
What's white and streaks across the sky? The coming of the Lord.

oumartin
2/15/2006, 01:28 PM
teacher gives the young boys in her class a scenerio.

You are out to dinner with a lovely girl and you need to use the restroom. What is the proper way to excuse yourself.

1st boy. Pardon me while I go Pee Pee. Teacher says you shouldn't say Pee.
2nd boy. Excuse me while I go to the restroom. Teacher says thats much better but still not proper.

She then asks skip and is hoping he will actually know what to say and he says.
Pardon me while I go shake hands with a friend of mine that I hope to introduce you to later.

Teacher faints.

IB4OU2
2/15/2006, 01:57 PM
The Receptionist

There's nothing worse than a snotty doctor's receptionist who insists you
tell her what is wrong in a room full of other patients. I know most of us
have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it.

An 86 year old man walked into a crowded doctor's office. As he approached
the desk, the receptionist said, "Yes sir, what are you seeing the doctor
for today?"

"There's something wrong with my *ick," he replied.

The receptionist became irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a
crowded office and say things like that."

"Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you," he said.

The receptionist replied, "You've obviously caused some embarrassment in
this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong
with
your ear or something and then discussed the problem further with the
doctor
in private."

The man replied, "You shouldn't ask people things in a room full of
others, if the answer could embarrass anyone."

The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered.

The receptionist smiled smugly and asked, "Yes?"

"There's something wrong with my ear," he stated.

The receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her
advice. "And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?"

"I can't **ss out of it," the man replied. The doctor's office erupted in
laughter.

:D

Pieces Hit
2/15/2006, 01:59 PM
Take my wife, please.

mdklatt
2/15/2006, 02:01 PM
Take my wife, please.

Fixed. :D

critical_phil
2/15/2006, 02:01 PM
....You don’t think I asked for big Bic do you.”


the judges would have also accepted: 12 inch pianist.....

OKC Sooner
2/15/2006, 02:06 PM
A termite walks into a bar and says, Is the bar tender here?

A priest, a rabbi and a preacher walk into a bar. The bartender says, What is this, some kind of joke?

Pieces Hit
2/15/2006, 02:13 PM
At the handicapped dance: A sad hare-lipped woman was approached by a man with a wooden eye...

Man: Would you like to dance?

Excited Woman: OH, WOULD I?

Man: HARE LIP! HARE LIP! HARE LIP!

IB4OU2
2/15/2006, 02:31 PM
At the handicapped dance: A sad hare-lipped woman was approached by a man with a wooden eye...

Man: Would you like to dance?

Excited Woman: OH, WOULD I?

Man: HARE LIP! HARE LIP! HARE LIP!

Gee, I didn't know they had dances like that.........I need to check it out.

Pieces Hit
2/15/2006, 02:35 PM
Chinese cook to Greek customer: "You care for flied lice?"

Greek: "You mean fried rice, right?"

Cook: "NO, flied lice you Gleek plick!"

Norm In Norman
2/15/2006, 08:20 PM
Rape is no laughing matter ... unless you're raping a clown. (http://www.tshirthell.com/store/product.php?productid=247&style=e&color=01&size=L)

Pieces Hit
2/16/2006, 08:53 AM
Oklahoma is so windy because Texas sucks and Kansas blows.

Pieces Hit
2/16/2006, 11:36 AM
Little dog with arm in sling walks into old west bar wearing six guns and says,

"I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw."

Mjcpr
2/16/2006, 11:39 AM
Something tells me you've got a million of 'em.

Pieces Hit
2/16/2006, 11:42 AM
What kind of sandwiches do astronauts eat?


launch meat.