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Rhino
8/10/2004, 01:10 PM
From Chicago Tribune (http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/chicago/chi-0408100046aug10,1,6920289.story?coll=chi-newslocalchicago-hed) (subscription req):

Band's driver denies drenching boat
Dave Matthews in town for shows, but buses `parked'

By Michael Hawthorne
Tribune staff reporter
Published August 10, 2004

The bus driver for rock star Dave Matthews called from the road Monday to say his luxury coach was not the one responsible for dousing passengers on a Chicago River tour boat with foul-smelling muck over the weekend.

Witnesses on the architectural sightseeing cruise told police they saw a long black tour bus dump liquid waste Sunday afternoon as their boat crossed under the Kinzie Street bridge.

About two-thirds of the passengers seated on the upper deck of Chicago's Little Lady were soaked with the "brownish-yellow" substance.

One witness gave Chicago police an Oregon license plate number that belongs to the 2003 Monaco Royale Coach driven by Jerry Fitzpatrick, who has been Matthews' tour bus driver for three years.

Fitzpatrick confirmed he was in Chicago with Matthews, whose band played the second of two shows at Alpine Valley in Wisconsin later that night. But the driver said he was parked in front of the Peninsula Hotel, 108 E. Superior St., when the waste rained down from the bridge several blocks away.

"There is no way I could be responsible for that," Fitzpatrick said from downstate Effingham. "I haven't emptied the tank for days. Besides, we are very cautious about how we do that sort of thing."

To bolster his case, Fitzpatrick coaxed Sgt. Paul Gardner of the Effingham Police Department to inspect the bus. He then gave Gardner his cell phone to tell a reporter that the tank was nearly full.

"One of the strangest requests I've ever had, that's for sure," Gardner said.

A publicist for the Dave Matthews Band issued a statement Monday night saying the group's management had "determined that all of the buses on our tour were parked at the time of this incident."

Back in Chicago, officials with the Chicago Architectural Foundation still were fielding angry calls from passengers on the ill-fated cruise.

All 120 passengers were given refunds on their $25 tickets. Five went to Northwestern Memorial Hospital for testing, police said.

Several have since called the foundation demanding compensation for clothing and personal items that got soaked.

"One man had a very expensive leather jacket that I'm sure he's not going to want to wear again," said Lynn Osmond, the foundation's president and CEO. "Our first concern is getting through the next few days and making sure nobody gets sick. Then we want to know who is responsible for this."

Chicago police are continuing to investigate, but for now the episode is not considered a crime, a spokesman said.

The Illinois Environmental Protection Agency and the Metropolitan Water Reclamation District of Greater Chicago also are investigating. The culprit could face charges for illegally dumping waste into the river.

Rob Sulski, an EPA engineer who has worked on Chicago River issues for most of the last two decades, said he has never heard of a bus emptying liquid waste into the river from a bridge. Most charter buses get rid of waste at licensed disposal sites, he said.

Asked why a witness identified his license plate, Fitzgerald speculated that boat passengers combed the area for tour buses and came across his waiting for Dave Matthews in front of the Peninsula Hotel.

After dropping off Matthews at Midway Airport on Monday, Fitzgerald headed to Arkansas for a break. He said he planned to empty the waste tank when he got home.

"This band is very environmentally conscious," he said. "We wouldn't have anything to do with this sort of thing."

Ike
8/10/2004, 01:11 PM
I heard about this on the news last night...funny as heck.

BigRedJed
8/10/2004, 01:19 PM
I would never bathe again. Just like how I haven't washed my right hand since I was 10, when Barry Switzer shook it.

Rhino
8/10/2004, 01:20 PM
Sure was a crappy thing to do.

Rhino
8/10/2004, 01:20 PM
I think those tourists are sh*t outta luck.

Rhino
8/10/2004, 01:21 PM
Dave Matthews probably doesn't give a sh*t.

Rhino
8/10/2004, 01:21 PM
That sure would **** me off.

Scott D
8/10/2004, 01:22 PM
Run out of puns yet Rhino? :D

BigRedJed
8/10/2004, 01:23 PM
Hey, the Chicago River was already a turdbucket.

BigRedJed
8/10/2004, 01:23 PM
Gives a whole new meaning to "floater."

Rhino
8/10/2004, 01:23 PM
Ah! It's poop again!

VeeJay
8/10/2004, 01:24 PM
Isn't Matthews part of that leftist contingent that's touring around insisting on Kerry getting elected?

Methinks his tour bus got wind that the boat was full of Conservatives.

Rhino
8/10/2004, 01:24 PM
What a sh*tty day.

Rhino
8/10/2004, 01:24 PM
So, that's why the water is a yellowish brown.

The Maestro
8/10/2004, 01:25 PM
I thought this was about his politics on the "Rock the Vote" tour.

saucysoonergal
8/10/2004, 01:25 PM
Don't pour foul yellowish/brown liquid down my back and tell me it is raining.

BigRedJed
8/10/2004, 01:25 PM
Of course, the tourists were all flush with anger.

BigRedJed
8/10/2004, 01:27 PM
Gives a whole new meaning to "crash into me."

The Maestro
8/10/2004, 01:27 PM
Dave Matthews bus = Ronald Miller

Chicago boat riders = redhead dood's front door in "Can't Buy Me Love".

BigRedJed
8/10/2004, 01:28 PM
When asked about the incident, Matthews said "I did it!"

saucysoonergal
8/10/2004, 01:28 PM
Confess, you like that movie.

Petro-Sooner
8/10/2004, 01:30 PM
Good ones Jed

Rhino
8/10/2004, 01:30 PM
I did it
Do you think I’ve gone too far?
I did it
Guilty as charged
I did it
It was me right or wrong
I did it
Yeah

Rhino
8/10/2004, 01:32 PM
I don't care if we all turn to waste...
so when I beg...you avoid me...because I smell of dirt... hungry,
hungry boy...you won't leave me all alone...the boy won't go

Rhino
8/10/2004, 01:34 PM
Don't drink the water
Don't drink the water
There's sh*t in the water
Don't drink the water

Sooner51
8/10/2004, 01:34 PM
I bet ants were marching right into that.

GrapevineSooner
8/10/2004, 01:51 PM
What would you say?
Don't drop the big one.
If you were on a tour boat.
Don't dump the wastewater.
What would you say?

OULOVE
8/10/2004, 02:54 PM
New Dave Matthews album. "Under the bridge and steaming"

C&CDean
8/10/2004, 03:45 PM
All he did was dump his latest CD over the side.

BigRedJed
8/10/2004, 03:46 PM
heh. you said "dump."

saucysoonergal
8/10/2004, 03:47 PM
I guess he ate it first...weird.

BigRedJed
8/10/2004, 03:49 PM
Same ****, different page.

C&CDean
8/10/2004, 03:53 PM
**** on a shingle.

I fell in a bucket of **** - and came out smelling like.....****.

"Like a **** over troubled water....."

Eh, another ****ty day.

KC//CRIMSON
8/10/2004, 04:19 PM
"Tough ****! people!" - Dave Matthews

KC//CRIMSON
8/10/2004, 05:55 PM
Those idiots! They could have made a fortune :D

Dave Matthews "**** in a Jar"

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GDC
7/10/2006, 03:08 PM
Did he **** on the soap too?

slickdawg
7/10/2006, 03:10 PM
:dean: WHO IN THE **** KEEPS DIGGING UP OLD THREADS?

VeeJay
7/10/2006, 06:25 PM
Would have been far less trouble if they'd put that crap in the fridge.

Oldnslo
7/10/2006, 08:14 PM
Would someone at this table pass me the effingham?!

OUstud
7/10/2006, 11:29 PM
DMB is overrated big time! There I said it.