Incident in the public restroom

[ouwasp]

So I go to the restroom at the Super Target at 71st and 169 in Tulsa. It's pretty busy, but I see the handicapped stall door standing ajar, so I enter. Instantly I notice the toilet paper holder is empty, so I simply go to another stall and take care of business.

A couple minutes later I'm standing at the sink washing my hands. In the mirror, a man is seen striding very purposefully down the row of stalls. I glance over my shoulder and see the handicapped door click shut. Within a quick moment a very, very, loud and long juicy fart rips the air of the men's restroom.

I almost bite through my lip trying to contain the laughter. (Why do we find humor in another person's misery?) I quickly exit the restroom.

I relate the incident to my family on the drive home. My elderly father laughs along with me. My kind-hearted wife says I should have offered a wad of paper under the stall to him. I told her misery and shame are best endured alone.

What would my fellow SF friends have done?

[Mongo]

Laugh. He thinks it is funny cause he is a guy. You laugh cause it is toilet humor

[SanJoaquinSooner]

It reminds of the Seinfeld episode in which Elaine is in a stall and discovers no toilet paper and begs the lady sitting in the next stall to give her some. The lady doesn't cooperate and Elaine starts begging for "please, just one sheet."

[ouwasp]

"I can't spare a square"

[cleller]

Awful predicament, but I think I'd have tried to summon the nerve for a "I know you probably don't want to be bothered now, but...."

Maybe it was one of those holders that has a spare hidden up inside.

[olevetonahill]

Why Yall going in the Crippled folk stall in the 1st place.

[Wishboned]

Why Yall going in the Crippled folk stall in the 1st place.

Lots of room. You can really stretch out in there.

[olevetonahill]

Lots of room. You can really stretch out in there.

Hell I can barely make myself go in a Public bathroom to Pee. let alone take a dump.

[KantoSooner]

Hell. I'm done my number two in a public john in Jakarta for god's sake. There are moments when need overcomes scruple.

[8timechamps]

Two things I find true in this life:

1. Farts are always funny.
2. NEVER approach an unknown person in a public restroom. For any reason. Ever.

[sanantoniosooner]

I heard a guy wimper like a little girl in a Lowes restroom once. I'm guessing he was constipated.

[SicEmBaylor]

I absolutely do not understand people who defecate in a public restroom. Was it really that critical that you couldn't wait until you got home? It's like some people are out and about (like Target) and suddenly decide, "Hey, I think I'll go take a dump right in the middle of shopping." It never ceases to amaze me.

[sanantoniosooner]

Frosty......the rest of the planet doesn't understand you either.

We're OK with the arrangement if you are.

[ouwasp]

Okay, let me address a few points...

-I went to the handicapped stall because it was obviously empty; I do not like to have to look under stall doors or through door cracks to see if the stall is available. The open door attracted both me and the unfortunate, but less observant fellow.
-Although I prefer not to defecate in a public restroom, sometimes there is simply no choice when nature's call hits. I was an hour's drive away from home. It was a necessary evil.
-I like to help folks. Just yesterday, I offered unbidden assistance to two others at a Sam's in loading bulky items. One accepted, one did not, but I didn't mind making the gesture.
-I do not have this desire to help in restrooms filled with strangers. Offering the type of help he needed just seemed too personal, and could have easily been misconstrued. This would have exacerbated matters.
-The poor fellow looked old enough to know better. He should have checked the tp status before he let rip. I suppose he has learned that lesson now.
-One course of action could have been to notify a Target employee. I probably should have done that.

[8timechamps]

Okay, let me address a few points...

-I went to the handicapped stall because it was obviously empty; I do not like to have to look under stall doors or through door cracks to see if the stall is available. The open door attracted both me and the unfortunate, but less observant fellow.
-Although I prefer not to defecate in a public restroom, sometimes there is simply no choice when nature's call hits. I was an hour's drive away from home. It was a necessary evil.
-I like to help folks. Just yesterday, I offered unbidden assistance to two others at a Sam's in loading bulky items. One accepted, one did not, but I didn't mind making the gesture.
-I do not have this desire to help in restrooms filled with strangers. Offering the type of help he needed just seemed too personal, and could have easily been misconstrued. This would have exacerbated matters.
-The poor fellow looked old enough to know better. He should have checked the tp status before he let rip. I suppose he has learned that lesson now.
-One course of action could have been to notify a Target employee. I probably should have done that.

You are an upstanding citizen!

I'm an ***, because I wouldn't have given it a second thought. Other than a chuckle as I walked out.

[Jacie]

Why Yall going in the Crippled folk stall in the 1st place.

Another reason to use it is you don't have to go quite so low to find the seat. That may not be a problem for everyone but as I get older, my body isn't as flexible as it used to be.

When we replaced our throne some years ago I got the tallboy and now whenever I have to use anyone else's it is like sitting in one of those kindergarten room chairs. Those few extra inches of height make a huge difference.

[SanJoaquinSooner]

Hell I can barely make myself go in a Public bathroom to Pee. let alone take a dump.

You're spoiled - always taking a **** with bambi and the other critters.

[SicEmBaylor]

I've never had to go so bad that I can't wait until I get home. Also, I never ever use the restroom unless I'm taking a shower immediately after.

[jkjsooner]

So, the other day I was at one of those self serve frozen yogurt places where you add your own toppings. The place had only one bathroom and there wasn't a great separation between the bathroom and the rest of the store. The door just kind of opened up into a very short hallway.

I'd been a little sick and I really had to go. I did so and I was mindful to not use too much toilet paper before the first flush. Little did I know that the toilet was for all intents and purposes broken. Even without anything in there there wasn't enough water for a full flush.

So there I was with a toilet full of stinky turds that wouldn't flush in a ice cream shop that really didn't need turds floating around in the toilet. And of course no plunger.

I dug my hand around that toilet and flushed 100 times until everything went down. It was the nastiest thing ever. I finally washed my hands for about 10 minutes. That wasn't enough so I washed them a couple more times.

Then I went on to finish my chocolate frozen yogurt.

True story. Next time I think I'll just leave the toilet full of crap...

[ouwasp]

jk, 999 people out of 1000 would have just walked away. You are a rare man.

[sanantoniosooner]

Dudes with fecal matter under their fingernails may not be as rare as you'd think.

[En_Fuego]

The point here is, there wasn't any toilet paper in the handicapped stall. What did he wipe his azz with.

[Lott's Bandana]

This thread is worthy without pics.

[okiewaker]

I got over not being able to take a dump in a public restroom when I was in high school. Restrooms in my high school didn't have stalls. They just had toilet bowls sitting there. After going a few times,,,I was no longer embarrassed.

[8timechamps]

So, the other day I was at one of those self serve frozen yogurt places where you add your own toppings. The place had only one bathroom and there wasn't a great separation between the bathroom and the rest of the store. The door just kind of opened up into a very short hallway.

I'd been a little sick and I really had to go. I did so and I was mindful to not use too much toilet paper before the first flush. Little did I know that the toilet was for all intents and purposes broken. Even without anything in there there wasn't enough water for a full flush.

So there I was with a toilet full of stinky turds that wouldn't flush in a ice cream shop that really didn't need turds floating around in the toilet. And of course no plunger.

I dug my hand around that toilet and flushed 100 times until everything went down. It was the nastiest thing ever. I finally washed my hands for about 10 minutes. That wasn't enough so I washed them a couple more times.

Then I went on to finish my chocolate frozen yogurt.

True story. Next time I think I'll just leave the toilet full of crap...

You, much like ouwasp, are a good man. I would have left it full, although I do think I would have mentioned that the toilet was broken on the way out (in a way that made it appear that I hadn't been the one to blow it up).

[SanJoaquinSooner]

Savvy women in Mexico carry a roll of toilet paper with them in their big hand bag.

[okiewaker]

One day in their feverish attempt to save the planet, the left will develop the recycle toilet. As you're taking a sh*t, you press the number 1 button on the wall and out pops a Big Mac and large fries,,,compliments of your own turds. I'm way off topic but,,,I had a few while mowing.

[SanJoaquinSooner]

One day in their feverish attempt to save the planet, the left will develop the recycle toilet. As you're taking a sh*t, you press the number 1 button on the wall and out pops a Big Mac and large fries,,,compliments of your own turds. I'm way off topic but,,,I had a few while mowing.

I do recall reading of a high tech port-o-potty that automatically washed your *** after you take a **** and blowing drying it.

[gh55]

ou did good another person might have waited to see if he was going to waddle next door to wipe and got it a video and posted on the web.

[SicEmBaylor]

You people disgust me.

[stoopified]

Personally would have left quietly and never said a word to anyone......ever.

[KantoSooner]

I do recall reading of a high tech port-o-potty that automatically washed your *** after you take a **** and blowing drying it.

Toto makes 'em. The washer is an excellent addition. (yes, you control the temp!) The blower? Not so much.

[olevetonahill]

Toto makes 'em. The washer is an excellent addition. (yes, you control the temp!) The blower? Not so much.

HMMMMM , Blower huh? Gives me some ideas.

[KantoSooner]

Nah. It's a little arm that telescopes out from the back under your nethers. First it produces an occilating spray of warm water. Then that turns off and the same nozzles emit warm air.
Try as I might, I couldn't figure out how to make it serve perverse purposes.

[olevetonahill]

Nah. It's a little arm that telescopes out from the back under your nethers. First it produces an occilating spray of warm water. Then that turns off and the same nozzles emit warm air.
Try as I might, I couldn't figure out how to make it serve perverse purposes.

Its got a telescopin arm? A blower? Give me a 30 pack and some time in my shop with one of em and Ill even have it turning the Porn pages .

[swardboy]

I'd turn the light off and walk out.

Happened to me.

[badger]

Savvy women in Mexico carry a roll of toilet paper with them in their big hand bag.

I heard you have to do this in Italy too