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View Full Version : Ann Coulter awarded amnesty



SanJoaquinSooner
2/1/2013, 12:01 AM
Conservative commentator and author Ann Coulter refused to stay on board a Miami to New York commercial airline flight today after learning the pilot was a woman of African-American descent.

According to witness reports Coulter was concerned the experienced, decorated pilot in question may have gained her position as a result of affirmative action and wasn't fully qualified to fly.

The incident began when Coulter boarded the American Airlines flight and took up her first class seat. After a trip to the bathroom, she noticed the pilot was a black woman and became immediately distraught.

According to passengers, at that point Coulter stood at the front of the cabin and began screaming her concerns to the entire flight as they finished boarding.

"Aw come on people, a black woman flying a plane? You know she got that job through affirmative action. Am I the only one worried about this? I mean hello? Our lives are at stake here..."

Ann Of Mean Labels

The confused passengers weren't sure what to make of Coulter's outburst, and remained completely silent.

"Really? So we're just gonna let this happen? We're gonna let political correctness determine our safety? Is this what we've come to in Obama's America? Letting just anyone fly a plane out of fear of being called a racist?"

"Oh come on don't be coy. I know you're all thinking it! I just have the courage to say what everyone on this plane is thinking. Am I right?"

"I mean what's next? Are we gonna let Mexicans become doctors now? Jesus Christ people!"

Realizing her efforts to provoke a mutiny had come to naught, Coulter then took her carry-on bags and bolted back up the jetway towards the gate against the orders of the flight attendants.

Final Descent Into Madness

In reality the pilot of the plane was trained by the U.S. Air Force and was a decorated veteran of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, where she flew aerial refueling missions for transport and reconnaissance aircraft.

She has been flying for American Airlines for four years, and is one of that airline's most experienced 737 pilots.

After the incident Coulter was taken in for questioning because violating the instructions of flight attendants is a federal offence. Law enforcement officials, however, say no charges will be filed.

"Clearly this woman has some sort of mental illness," explains TSA spokesperson Dirk Diggler, "We recommended against pressing charges, and mandated a full psychiatric evaluation."

Coulter, however, is unapologetic about her actions. In a statement released on her official Tumblr she defended her decision to stay off the plane.

"I made the best decision I could with the information I had at the time. I'm not gonna risk my life for the sake of some liberal fantasy of equality. "

Coulter is known for her controversial views on race, and is the author of the recent book Mugged: Racial Demagoguery from the Seventies to Obama.

http://dailycurrant.com/2013/01/29/ann-coulter-refuses-board-airplane-black-pilot/


Personally, I don't think she is mentally ill. I think she's developing material for her next book.

okie52
2/1/2013, 12:57 AM
You believe that story is real there juan?

It is pretty funny though.

RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!
2/1/2013, 01:04 AM
You believe that story is real there juan?

It is pretty funny though.IMO It doesn't matter whether he thinks it's real. he just want to be sure people see it.

sappstuf
2/1/2013, 01:58 AM
Other stories from the Daily Currant..


Former Notre Dame linebacker Manti Te'o has reportedly lost his life savings in an investment fund for a company looking to build a bridge between Hawaii and San Francisco.


Lance Armstrong Tells Oprah He’s Gay

And of course, the big whammy..


The Daily Currant is an English language online satirical newspaper that covers global politics, business, technology, entertainment, science, health and media. It is accessible from over 190 countries worldwide - now including South Sudan.
Our mission is to ridicule the timid ignorance which obstructs our progress, and promote intelligence - which presses forward.

Q. Are your newstories real?
A. No. Our stories are purely fictional. However they are meant to address real-world issues through satire and often refer and link to real events happening in the world

StoopTroup
2/1/2013, 02:44 AM
Why didn't the Current have her tasered by an Air Marshall and then given a cavity Search by a Muslim EMT before The FBI had one of their lesbian Agents water board her?

Blue
2/1/2013, 02:52 AM
Speaking of unwanted cavity search http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2250218/Angel-Ashley-Dobbs-suing-Texas-troopers-shocking-BODY-CAVITY-search-caught-tape.htmlch...

Don't mess w/ Texas

StoopTroup
2/1/2013, 03:07 AM
Alabama Troopers would have medicated her anal cyst?

FaninAma
2/1/2013, 10:41 AM
SJS, 'fess up. Did you think the story was real? If so you should stay away from the Onion. Just giving you a hard time. I think you were being sarcastic.

badger
2/1/2013, 10:44 AM
SJS, 'fess up. Did you think the story was real? If so you should stay away from the Onion. Just giving you a hard time. I think you were being sarcastic.

China needs to stay away from the Onion (http://www.npr.org/2012/12/01/166293306/the-onion-so-funny-it-makes-us-cry) :D

rock on sooner
2/1/2013, 11:00 AM
Ms. Coulter will probably stage a reenactment for Fox News, to audition
to replace Sarah Palin.:devilish:

okie52
2/1/2013, 11:13 AM
Ms. Coulter will probably stage a reenactment for Fox News, to audition
to replace Sarah Palin.:devilish:

Fox needs to get Pelosi...just to be fair and balanced.

KantoSooner
2/1/2013, 12:32 PM
now THAT would be funny.

StoopTroup
2/1/2013, 12:36 PM
If the 49ers win the Super Bowl....Nancy will be all over TV and will probably make sure the Team gets a really nice visit to the White House to meet President Obama.

badger
2/1/2013, 12:50 PM
Pelosi: I am bestowing you with the prestigious honor that even goes to the college volleyball champions these days...

olevetonahill
2/1/2013, 12:52 PM
SJS, 'fess up. Did you think the story was real? If so you should stay away from the Onion. Just giving you a hard time. I think you were being sarcastic.

You know dayum well and good he thot there was Meat in that taco

RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!
2/1/2013, 01:48 PM
Fox needs to get Pelosi...just to be fair and balanced.Pelosi gets herself, but the LIV's think she's doing a good job...

Bourbon St Sooner
2/1/2013, 01:49 PM
Ann Coulter's an illegal immigrant?

RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!
2/1/2013, 01:50 PM
You know dayum well and good he thot there was Meat in that tacoHe just wanted it to stick to the wall, whether false or not.

RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!
2/1/2013, 01:52 PM
If the 49ers win the Super Bowl....Nancy will be all over TV and will probably make sure the Team gets a really nice visit to the White House to meet President Obama.Good enough reason to pull for the Ravens. Besides, SF has won WAY more than their share of SB's already.


I know I know, with the Ravens we'll be put upon by Plugs Biden, sorry to say

StoopTroup
2/1/2013, 02:14 PM
I'm also just not much of a Ray Lewis Fan. I think he's very lucky to have been able to finish his career instead of become a Penitentiary Celebrity.

Sooner98
2/1/2013, 02:19 PM
I would have thought that no one here could possibly be gullible enough to believe this story to be true, but SJS's comments following the story have me wondering if I was wrong.

RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!
2/1/2013, 02:25 PM
I would have thought that no one here could possibly be gullible enough to believe this story to be true, but SJS's comments following the story have me wondering if I was wrong.Maybe SJS is a "classic" LIV?

SanJoaquinSooner
2/1/2013, 04:48 PM
Yes, it sounded just like a pubicity stunt she would pull to sell more books, but I did follow the link when I noticed a word either misspelled or British spelled.

RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!
2/1/2013, 04:56 PM
Yes, it sounded just like a pubicity stunt she would pull to sell more books, but I did follow the link when I noticed a word either misspelled or British spelled.SUUUURE it did!

Chuck Bao
2/2/2013, 03:03 AM
I thought it was real until I got to the Dirk Diggler part at the end of the story.

RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!
2/2/2013, 03:06 AM
I thought it was real until I got to the Dirk Diggler part at the end of the story.SJS said he thought it was real, too. What does that tell ya?

diverdog
2/2/2013, 07:52 AM
If the 49ers win the Super Bowl....Nancy will be all over TV and will probably make sure the Team gets a really nice visit to the White House to meet President Obama.

Nancy is also from Baltimore. If they win she do the same thing.

diverdog
2/2/2013, 07:53 AM
Yes, it sounded just like a pubicity stunt she would pull to sell more books, but I did follow the link when I noticed a word either misspelled or British spelled.

Dude you need to be beat. Head in hand.

olevetonahill
2/2/2013, 08:12 AM
Dude you need to be beat. Head in hand.

Told ya he thought there was Meat in that Taco.