Time For Some Levity: Best Political Joke You've Heard This Year

[FaninAma]

I'll start although you may have heard this one.

Did you know that MacDonald's has introduced a new Obama Meal on their menu?
You order whatever you like and the guy behind you pays for it.

[badger]

"Apparently a large branch of Mitt Romney’s family lives in Mexico. ... His grandfather in the late 1800s moved his whole family to Mexico to avoid being prosecuted for polygamy. ... Mitt can use that to show that he’s tough on immigration. His family kicked themselves out of the country." –Jimmy Kimmel

i know lame. more lameness here (http://politicalhumor.about.com/od/mittromney/a/Mitt-Romney-Jokes.htm)

[rock on sooner]

"Apparently a large branch of Mitt Romney’s family lives in Mexico. ... His grandfather in the late 1800s moved his whole family to Mexico to avoid being prosecuted for polygamy. ... Mitt can use that to show that he’s tough on immigration. His family kicked themselves out of the country." –Jimmy Kimmel

i know lame. more lameness here (http://politicalhumor.about.com/od/mittromney/a/Mitt-Romney-Jokes.htm)

You're right, Badger, lameness is prevalent, but one or two of
the jokes are funny....

[badger]

Here are a few fun facts about the new ObamaPhone:

ObamaPhone gets great reviews on MSNBC.

ObamaPhone promises to do better if you buy it again.

Chris Matthews ♥s the ObamaPhone vibrator mode.

Joe Biden's ObamaPhone has a rotary dial.

The Fluke model ObamaPhone includes free phone sex.

Acorn ObamaPhones are registered in fake names.

ObamaPhone skins are very thin.

ObamaPhone redistributes your rollover minutes.

ObamaPhones don't have a mute button.

When ObamaPhone drops a call it blames BushPhone.

ObamaPhone will never be a smartphone.

ObamaPhone has the unemployment office on speed dial.

ObamaPhone never works between 9am and 5pm.

ObamaPhone comes with a tiny teleprompter.

The only game on the ObamaPhone is golf.

Banks get a trillion free minutes on ObamaPhone.

ObamaPhone's map app covers all 57 states.

ObamaPhone's map app is missing Jerusalem.

ObamaPhone blocks calls from taxpayers.

The ObamaPhone cursor always points to Mecca.

ObamaPhone's come in wind or solar powered.

ObamaPhone is only available with a four year plan.

ObamaPhone's navigation system always turns left.

An ObamaCare app installs without your permission.

The ObamaPhone was made in Kenya... er, Hawaii.

[okie52]

I told this one on here about 8-9 months ago.

A liberal, a conservative and a moderate walk into a bar. The bartender says "hi Mitt".

[badger]

Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Well, for example, the other day I went downtown and into a shop. I was only there for about 5 minutes, and when I came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. I said to him, 'Come on, man, how about giving a retired person a break'? He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. I called him a 'Nazi.' He glared at me and wrote another ticket for having worn tires. So I called him a 'doughnut eating Gestapo.' He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he wrote a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more I abused him the more tickets he wrote. Personally, I didn't care. I came downtown on the bus, and the car that he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said, 'I ♥ Obama.' I try to have a little fun each day now that I'm retired. It's important to my health.

[FaninAma]

Badger, that is classic.

[FaninAma]

2713

[SanJoaquinSooner]

I thought Mitt's Al Smith speech was the funniest stuff of the political season. I imagine most of you have already watched it.

But in case you haven't ....


NIHbe-aO6oI

[XingTheRubicon]

"Mitt Romney is saying his comments about liking to fire people were taken out of context. Yeah, what he actually said was he likes to set poor people on fire." –Conan O'Brien

love Conan


"Most analysts agree the big debate winner last night was Mitt Romney, who stuck closely to his strategy of not being any of the other candidates." –Jimmy Kimmel

[Midtowner]

I'll start although you may have heard this one.

Did you know that MacDonald's has introduced a new Obama Meal on their menu?
You order whatever you like and the guy behind you pays for it.

Did you know that McDonald's has introduced a new Romney Meal on their menu? You order, the food is poisoned, but tort reform means you have no remedy.

Did you know that McDonald's has introduced a new Romney Meal on their menu? You order whatever you like and they give it to the 1%er standing behind you.

[okie52]

Did you know that McDonald's has introduced a new Romney Meal on their menu? You order, the food is poisoned, but tort reform means you have no remedy.

Did you know that McDonald's has introduced a new Romney Meal on their menu? You order whatever you like and they give it to the 1%er standing behind you.

Did you make those up yourself Mid?

[badger]

OK, an original that I just thought up:

Fellow Republicans of Oklahoma, we all know that we are going to vote for Romney no matter what, so I have an idea:

Let's vote for Obama instead.

By appearing to be a contested "swing state," we will have more attention in future elections from presidential candidates during both the primaries and the general election.

So Oklahoma, VOTE OBAMA!

OBAMA FOR OKLAHOMA!

OKLAHOMANS FOR OBAMA!

O-BAM-A, OK!

:D

[FaninAma]

Did you know that McDonald's has introduced a new Romney Meal on their menu? You order, the food is poisoned, but tort reform means you have no remedy.

Did you know that McDonald's has introduced a new Romney Meal on their menu? You order whatever you like and they give it to the 1%er standing behind you.

I heard it differently. The Romney meal gives your wife terminal cancer then takes away your health insurance and makes you breathe dirty air. The cost of the meal is free if you make over $250,000 but they charge you double if you are poor. Then Ronald McDonald comes to your house and kicks you in the nutz and tells you your job just got sent to China.

Did I cover everything in the Progressive's talking points?

[Tulsa_Fireman]

A priest, a rabbi, and a mexican walk into a bar.

Obama is a fag.