the_ouskull
10/4/2011, 09:48 PM
[Sgt Hartman]
Jesus H. Christ! EVERY time I turn on the television, I have to hear about C. McCoy and J. Shipley. Is this 2008, or have they legalized cloning gay sheep?
[/Sgt Hartman]
I just wanted to get that out of the way early...
QB - But seriously... all I'm hearing is about McCoy's completion percentage, and how he's thrown no interceptions so far. First of all, is it even a sure thing that he's the starter? Second, he's only thrown 37 passes all year. (Completing 26, for a percentage of 70.3. Impressive, but he's no Landry Jones, sittin' at 71.6%.) Third, sure, he's thrown zero interceptions, but he's also only thrown 2 touchdowns. Landry's thrown 10. That brings him to 74 for his career. Landry has a better shot of catching Colt than Case does of catching Landry. We're done here.
RB - They may have the more "talented" backfield, but that doesn't make them better players. Statistically, Whaley is the best RB in this game. Clay compares favorably with Whittaker, 'cause seriously, do I have to call an (alleged) adult "Fozzy?" Who the f*ck does he think he is? Chris Jericho? Push.
FB - Seriously...?
WR/TE - OU has an All-American. Broyles is making an assault on the record books. Tejas has a white kid whose parents chose to give him the male equivalent of a stripper's name. (Seriously? If he would have been born more of a daughter, would you have named her Portia, or Ginger, or Lexus?) OU also has Kenny Stills, Franks, Hanna, Reynolds, and all of our backs coming out of the backfield. Tejas has that white kid I was talking about earlier and Whittaker coming out of the backfield as their "threats." I hear this Davis kid is special. That's what they said about Roy "Ofer" Williams, too. H*ll, they even made a movie about that kid...
http://www.allmovia.com/c/1094/1094_2.jpg
It tells me a lot about the quality of a team's passing game when their (maybe) starting QB has the second best ypc on the team.
Maybe they're going to sneak up on us. (I know, I'm reaching...)
Let's examine their opponents.
They beat:
- Rice, who currently sports the worst-ranked defense in the country. (ypg)
- BYU, in a comeback win, even though they rank in the middle of the pack in every appreciable defensive category.
- UCLA, the 98th-ranked defense, only 22 slots behind Rice.
- And Iowa State rolling in at #62.
Okay, so their offensive unit may still be "finding itself." Big deal.
Defense wins championships, right?
So, why doesn't Tejas have any defensive players that I've heard of?
OU is rolling out with a defense full of people that everybody has heard of. Travis Lewis. Tony Jefferson. Ronnell Lewis. Tom Wort. Frank Alexander.
Tejas has a team full of juniors and seniors whose names I don't even remember. And I'm not saying that as a roundabout way of making fun of their lack of quality or depth. I'm being sincere. I mean, this Acho (TFSM Bless You) kid made 2nd team All-Big 12 last year. I guess he's good.
Doesn't matter. This game's won WITH the ball, not off it.
OU - 31
Tejas - 21
the_ouskull
Jesus H. Christ! EVERY time I turn on the television, I have to hear about C. McCoy and J. Shipley. Is this 2008, or have they legalized cloning gay sheep?
[/Sgt Hartman]
I just wanted to get that out of the way early...
QB - But seriously... all I'm hearing is about McCoy's completion percentage, and how he's thrown no interceptions so far. First of all, is it even a sure thing that he's the starter? Second, he's only thrown 37 passes all year. (Completing 26, for a percentage of 70.3. Impressive, but he's no Landry Jones, sittin' at 71.6%.) Third, sure, he's thrown zero interceptions, but he's also only thrown 2 touchdowns. Landry's thrown 10. That brings him to 74 for his career. Landry has a better shot of catching Colt than Case does of catching Landry. We're done here.
RB - They may have the more "talented" backfield, but that doesn't make them better players. Statistically, Whaley is the best RB in this game. Clay compares favorably with Whittaker, 'cause seriously, do I have to call an (alleged) adult "Fozzy?" Who the f*ck does he think he is? Chris Jericho? Push.
FB - Seriously...?
WR/TE - OU has an All-American. Broyles is making an assault on the record books. Tejas has a white kid whose parents chose to give him the male equivalent of a stripper's name. (Seriously? If he would have been born more of a daughter, would you have named her Portia, or Ginger, or Lexus?) OU also has Kenny Stills, Franks, Hanna, Reynolds, and all of our backs coming out of the backfield. Tejas has that white kid I was talking about earlier and Whittaker coming out of the backfield as their "threats." I hear this Davis kid is special. That's what they said about Roy "Ofer" Williams, too. H*ll, they even made a movie about that kid...
http://www.allmovia.com/c/1094/1094_2.jpg
It tells me a lot about the quality of a team's passing game when their (maybe) starting QB has the second best ypc on the team.
Maybe they're going to sneak up on us. (I know, I'm reaching...)
Let's examine their opponents.
They beat:
- Rice, who currently sports the worst-ranked defense in the country. (ypg)
- BYU, in a comeback win, even though they rank in the middle of the pack in every appreciable defensive category.
- UCLA, the 98th-ranked defense, only 22 slots behind Rice.
- And Iowa State rolling in at #62.
Okay, so their offensive unit may still be "finding itself." Big deal.
Defense wins championships, right?
So, why doesn't Tejas have any defensive players that I've heard of?
OU is rolling out with a defense full of people that everybody has heard of. Travis Lewis. Tony Jefferson. Ronnell Lewis. Tom Wort. Frank Alexander.
Tejas has a team full of juniors and seniors whose names I don't even remember. And I'm not saying that as a roundabout way of making fun of their lack of quality or depth. I'm being sincere. I mean, this Acho (TFSM Bless You) kid made 2nd team All-Big 12 last year. I guess he's good.
Doesn't matter. This game's won WITH the ball, not off it.
OU - 31
Tejas - 21
the_ouskull