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sappstuf
6/22/2011, 09:12 PM
Pilot caught with open mic rant


Local 2 Investigates transcribed the contents of the entire recording as follows:

Air Traffic Controller - (ATC) "United 242, you (center up)"

(Stuck microphone begins) Southwest Pilot: "Well, I had Tucson to Indy all four weeks and, uh, Chicago crews…11 out of 12 …there’s 12 flight attendants, individual, never the same flight attendant twice. "Eleven (expletive) over the top (expletive), (expletive) homosexuals and a granny." (silence)
"Eleven. I mean, think of the odds of that. I thought I was in Chicago, which was party-land."

(Possible attempt to interrupt by ATC)

Southwest Pilot: "After that, it was just a continuous stream of gays and grannies and grandes…" (off mic from his copilot - inaudible)
Pilot answers: "Well I don’t give a (expletive). I hate 100 percent of their (expletive)."

"So, six months, I went to the bar three times. In six months, three times." (Another possible attempt to interrupt by ATC)
"Once with the granny and the (slur against gay people), and I wish I hadn’t gone."

"At the very end with two girls, one of them that was part do-able, but we ended up going to the bar and then to the crew at St. Louis, and all these two women wanted to do was, one wanted to berate her sister and the other wanted to bitch about her husband."

"Literally, for three hours, me and the F.O. (First officer). When that was done, got back to my room, I’m like why the (expletive) did I stay up?"

ATC: "OK, whoever is, uh, transmitting, better watch what you’re saying."

(Tones beeping)

Southwest Pilot continues: "They’re still both (inaudible), you know what I mean? I still wouldn’t want anyone to know if I had banged them."
(Tones beeping)

"So, I mean it was a complete disaster for six months."

"Now I’m back in Houston, which is easily where the ugliest base is. I mean it’s all these (expletive) old dudes and grannies and there’s like maybe a handful of cute chicks."

ATC: "OK, someone’s got a stuck mic and, uh, telling us all about their endeavors. We don’t need to hear that."

(Stuck microphone episode ends)

(Silence)

http://www.ksat.com/news/28325777/detail.html
soonercruiser
6/22/2011, 09:21 PM
Unhappy Pilot???
:rolleyes:
Wishboned
6/22/2011, 09:37 PM
That reminds me of the story Will told in Good Will Hunting


n a passenger flight, the pilot comes over the public address system as usual to greet the passengers. He tells them at what altitude they'll be flying, the expected arrival time, a bit about the weather, and advises them to relax and have a good flight. Then, forgetting to turn off the microphone, he says to his co-pilot, "What would relax me right now is a cup of coffee and a blowjob." All the passengers hear it. As a stewardess immediately begins to run toward the cockpit to tell the pilot of his slip-up, one of the passengers stops her and says, "Don't forget the coffee!
mgsooner
6/22/2011, 09:54 PM
Grandy's?
sappstuf
6/23/2011, 12:25 PM
Now you can hear the awesome audio!

NSFW language!

It is about halfway down the page.

http://dfw.cbslocal.com/2011/06/22/southwest-airlines-pilot-suspended-after-radio-rant/
TheHumanAlphabet
6/23/2011, 12:28 PM
I am surprised the dude still has his job. Diversity training and time off? WOW! You would be gone where I work.
Mississippi Sooner
6/23/2011, 12:31 PM
Was Quagmire the pilot in question? Cuz I could see him going off on a rant like that.
crawfish
6/23/2011, 12:38 PM
I am surprised the dude still has his job. Diversity training and time off? WOW! You would be gone where I work.

Southwest is insanely protective of their employees. My dad got treated pretty badly by a flight attendant once. He got into an email conversation with Herb Kelleher over the next few weeks, telling him exactly what happened, but Herb didn't budge in defending her. My dad respected him for standing up for his employees, but he also removed Southwest from the list of approved airlines for the USPS Training Center for a while. :)
JamesHale
6/23/2011, 01:08 PM
most hear "Gays, Grannies and Grandes" and are offended... I hear it and think, "TRIFECTA, baby!!!"
Chuck Bao
6/23/2011, 01:11 PM
The pilot can always get a job flying for Thai Airways. I think that they have a pretty dodgy practice of replacing older flight attendants.

I find it humorous that he is complaining about the "over the top (expletive), (expletive) homosexuals." Dammit queers, keep it on the down low.
Pricetag
6/23/2011, 01:25 PM
I was thinking that they should release his name to ruin any further chances with the ladies, but then I'm thinking he probably didn't have that much success anyway. He kinda strikes me as one of those guys that hits on a woman, gets rejected, then says he shoulda known she was a lezbo.
delhalew
6/23/2011, 01:32 PM
I'm backing that guy. Flight attendants these days are trolls, unless you're gay. They seem to getting decent talent from the gay community.
Mississippi Sooner
6/23/2011, 01:36 PM
I'm backing that guy. Flight attendants these days are trolls, unless you're gay. They seem to getting decent talent from the gay community.

And sadly, Southwest used to be known, along with PSA out on the west coast, as the airline with the hottest girls in the hottest outfits.
delhalew
6/23/2011, 01:39 PM
And sadly, Southwest used to be known, along with PSA out on the west coast, as the airline with the hottest girls in the hottest outfits.

Flying used to be pretty awesome. Now the only fun to had is during your TSA molestation.
TheHumanAlphabet
6/23/2011, 02:23 PM
The pilot can always get a job flying for Thai Airways. I think that they have a pretty dodgy practice of replacing older flight attendants.

I find it humorous that he is complaining about the "over the top (expletive), (expletive) homosexuals." Dammit queers, keep it on the down low.

Many Asian and Middle East airlines age FAs out pretty early. The men get to be Pursers, but I have never seen an aged FA on any of the above said airlines.
GrapevineSooner
6/23/2011, 04:30 PM
I'm going to LMAO if the pilot is identified as Jake from the Bachelor.
3rdgensooner
6/23/2011, 04:32 PM
So, the pilot, which is he: Gay, Grampa, or Grande?
jumperstop
6/23/2011, 06:38 PM
And sadly, Southwest used to be known, along with PSA out on the west coast, as the airline with the hottest girls in the hottest outfits.

I flew KLM to Europe, the Dutch Royal Airline, and let me tell you it was the nicest flight I've been on. All the fa were well under 30 and all extremely attractive blond girls. Not only that, they didn't act repulsed at helping you like the old *** ugly bitches on American flights. I think they should make fa retire when they are too old because they begin to hate their job and take it out on you. It's not my fault they've been flying everyday for the last 30 years....
Turd_Ferguson
6/23/2011, 06:44 PM
So, the pilot, which is he: Gay, Grampa, or Grande?Neither. It was a 32 yr old, married black guy. What ya got to say now?
3rdgensooner
6/23/2011, 06:49 PM
Neither. It was a 32 yr old, married black guy. What ya got to say now?I have two thoughts:

1) I can't remember the last time I saw a black pilot, so my question was based on my experience with pilots. Obviously, anecdotal evidence is really important on the internet. And I'm not sure why "black" even matters given my question.

and

2) based on this

All the fa were well under 30 and all extremely attractive blond girls. Not only that, they didn't act repulsed at helping you like the old *** ugly bitches on American flights. He is getting old and ugly. So I wasn't far off on the Grampa question.

Are you a pilot, Turd?
Turd_Ferguson
6/23/2011, 06:54 PM
I have two thoughts:

1) I can't remember the last time I saw a black pilot, so my question was based on my experience with pilots. Obviously, anecdotal evidence is really important on the internet. And I'm not sure why "black" even matters given my question.

and

2) based on this
He is getting old and ugly. So I wasn't far off on the Grampa question.

Are you a pilot, Turd?How do you know he's old and ugly?