Are you bored?

[3rdgensooner]

Database: Emergency room injuries reported by hospitals (http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/ftlaudNEISS_list.php)

The Consumer Product Safety Commission's National Electronic Injury Surveillance System (NEISS) is a sample of 100 hospital emergency rooms in the United States and its territories. Patient information is collected from NEISS hospitals for every emergency visit involving an injury associated with consumer products, including toys. Many injuries found here are the result of carelessness and not the fault of the product itself. More than 391,000 injuries were reported in 2009, the latest available year for NEISS data. That represents a five percent increase over 2008.

Type a keyword (such as "toy" or "eye" or "turkey" or "Christmas") into the Keyword search box and click on the magnifying glass. Children under age 2 are reported in months with the number "2" prefix: 223 = 23 months. You can also search by sex, age and treatment date. Use Advanced Search to select a date range.

Date (http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/ftlaudNEISS_list.php?orderby=atrmt_date) http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/images/down.gif Age (http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/ftlaudNEISS_list.php?orderby=aage) Sex (http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/ftlaudNEISS_list.php?orderby=asex) Race (http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/ftlaudNEISS_list.php?orderby=arace) Narrative (http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/ftlaudNEISS_list.php?orderby=anarrative)
12/31/2009 19 M White 19 YO M HAD FALL ONTO CONCRETE FLOOR STRIKING HEAD. DX:HEAD LACERATION.

12/31/2009 14 M Black 14YOM FELL ON TRAMPOLINE AT HOME, HIT SIDE CHEST WALL, CONTUSION TO CHE ST WALL 12/31/2009 7 M White 7YOM HAS 1 DEGREE BURN TO NECK FROM FIREWORKS AT HOME, FIRECRACKER PACK WENT OFF More ... (http://javascript<b></b>:void(0);)

12/31/2009 58 M White 58YOM CUT FOREARM WITH BOXCUTTER AT HOME, LACERATION TO L FOREARM

12/31/2009 48 M White 48 M, PT WAS WATCHING HIS COUSIN WELD WITHOUT WEARING PROTECTIVE GLASSE S. DX. F More ... (http://javascript<b></b>:void(0);)

[Viking Kitten]

I typed in "Bear Attack" and nothing came up. Fail.

[The]

Rectum? I damn near killed 'em...


50YOM FOREIGN BODY IN RECTUM, USING PLASTIC DOG TOY IN RECTUM DURING SE X, PART OF TOY GOT STUCK*

[hipsterdoofus]

DX ALLERGY: 11YOM ONSET YTDY ON ARMS, TOOK SHOWER, USED "AXE BODYWASH" & NOTICED RASH INC TO TORSO, ARMS, AND FACE

:P

[Viking Kitten]

8/6/2009 16 M Black HAS GROIN PAIN W/BIG KNOT IN GROIN, STATES OFTEN MASTURBATES BEFORE GOI NG TO SL More ... (http://www.soonerfans.com/forums/)

That's no knot, son.

[NormanPride]

FACIAL FX-TRIPPED OVER DOG TOYS AND HIT FACE ON THE WALL AT HOME PT HAD BEEN DRINKING

.

[DIB]

3/12/2009 82 M White 82YO WHITE MALE PUT INK PEN INTO PENIS DX URETHRAL TEAR, FOREIGN BODY INSERTION More ...



.

[booomer]

Date (http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/ftlaudNEISS_list.php?orderby=atrmt_date) http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/images/down.gif Age (http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/ftlaudNEISS_list.php?orderby=aage) Sex (http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/ftlaudNEISS_list.php?orderby=asex) Race (http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/ftlaudNEISS_list.php?orderby=arace) Narrative (http://databases.sun-sentinel.com/news/health/ftlaudNEISS2010/ftlaudNEISS_list.php?orderby=anarrative)
9/5/2009 21 M Not stated JELLO WRESTLING AT MIT AND DISLOCATED SHOULDER


Heh!

[booomer]

12/16/2009 3 M White

PUNCTURED SCROTUM WITH ANTENNA OF REMOTE CONTROL CAR;DX PUNCTURED PUBIC REGION

:eek:

[Tulsa_Fireman]

12/03/2010 24 M White

PUNCTURED SCROTUM WITH KEYBOARD WHILE POSTING ON SOONERFANS.COM:Dx PUNCTURED PUBIC REGION

[Viking Kitten]

Chupacabra: No records found.

[Penguin]

7/26/2009 24 F PT WAS CUTTING THE STRING OFF HER TAMPON AFTER INSERTING IT WITH A PAIR OF SCISSORS AND CUT LABIA LACERATION VAGINA



Makes sense to me.

[thecynic]

PT COMES IN WITH SEXUAL DEVICE IN ANUS AND UNABLE TO REMOVE IT. DX: F OREIGN BODY IN ANUS

[Thaumaturge]

PT WAS AT THE DENTIST, PT WAS STRUCK IN THE FACE BY A PUPPET THAT HAD SOME SORT OF TEETH, SUFFERED SM LAC TO EYEBROW DX: LAC TO EYEBROW

Bitten on the face by a puppet?! Ye gods!

[Viking Kitten]

12/4/2009 47 M White WHILE USING STHIL CHAINSAW-LAC L LOWER LEG IN WOODS DX LAC LLL





Dean?

[Penguin]

7/26/2009 12 F Not stated @ SOCCER CAMP, REPORTS ALL GIRLS SWIMS IN THE POOL, NOW WITH VAGINAL RA SH>>RASH


Yes, officer. It's the damndest thing. I invited a bunch of 12 year old girls to my house, er, I mean, soccer camp. And, now they have all have a rash. Hmm...must have been the pool. Yeah, the pool.