Annual "Most Loathsome Christmas Song" Discussion

[Thaumaturge]

Rather than everyone's favorite Christmas songs, I'm more interested in what are the songs people feel the most revulsion towards this year. That means, even if you know that stupid Straight No Chaser "12 Days of Christmas" song is the worst, vilest piece of crap you've ever heard, if you haven't heard it this year, it doesn't count. This thread is for the songs that are being pumped out over the radio waves and filling our souls with metaphorical pus and infection the most this year. I like to see the year-to-year trends. For example, a few years ago, "Jingle Bell Rock" was the clear winner, as it is unquestionably putrid and different versions were being played every other song, each more vomitous than the last. But I've yet to hear it once this year, refreshingly enough.

Anyhow, I'm rambling, so let me get to my current list:

5) "Winter Wonderland." This was last year's runaway winner, but I've only heard it a couple times as of yet. One version was strangely creepy, but I can deal with that.

4) Paul McCartney's "Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time." Objectively, this is the worst Christmas song ever committed to record. Luckily, I've only heard it once so far. But that's easily enough to earn it fourth place.

3) "Jingle Bells". That's right. Regular Jingle Bells. It's an all right song for little kids, I guess, but no recorded version is worth listening to, and most are actively obnoxious. It seems especially popular this year, too.

2) The Beach Boys' "Little Saint Nick." The Beach Boys are wretched in and of themselves, but I heard this dreck three times on my drive home after Thanksgiving, and it almost caused an accident each time.

1) "The Christmas Song" a.k.a. "Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire." This is the one that stands out for me presently. It's the one that's playing everywhere I go, galling me with its insipid blandness. **** you, "Christmas Song." **** you.

That's it for the moment. The season's still young, so "Baby It's Cold Outside" or one of TSO's blended crap-fests could still make a run for the gold.

[usaosooner]

tl;dr

[soonerinkaty]

I love Christmas songs. They put me in the mood to get a **** ton of gifts.

[VeeJay]

Paul's song ain't too bad.

Fellow Liverpoolian John Lennon's "Happy Christmas" is far, far worse. Just the thought of a drug-addled peacenik with no religious bone in his body is enough to make Frosty The Snowman hurl.

I always liked this one, though:

1oNql4cplh4

[SoonerBorn68]

Some folks don't like this, but it's one of MY all time favs:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zbVCODrdBaE

[soonerchk]

"Grandma got run over by a Reindeer" makes me want to disembowel the writer of said crap.

[thecynic]

Paul's song ain't too bad.

Fellow Liverpoolian John Lennon's "Happy Christmas" is far, far worse. Just the thought of a drug-addled peacenik with no religious bone in his body is enough to make Frosty The Snowman hurl.

I always liked this one, though:

1oNql4cplh4

this is my personal favorite. I'm with chk on the crappy song one

[bluedogok]

Giddy Up....it doesn't matter which version, that is just a huge steaming pile of annoying.

[afs]

Wham! - Last Christmas

E8gmARGvPlI

[DIB]

Does this abortion count?

SXh7JR9oKVE

[GottaHavePride]

5) "Winter Wonderland." This was last year's runaway winner, but I've only heard it a couple times as of yet. One version was strangely creepy, but I can deal with that.

4) Paul McCartney's "Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time." Objectively, this is the worst Christmas song ever committed to record. Luckily, I've only heard it once so far. But that's easily enough to earn it fourth place.

3) "Jingle Bells". That's right. Regular Jingle Bells. It's an all right song for little kids, I guess, but no recorded version is worth listening to, and most are actively obnoxious. It seems especially popular this year, too.

2) The Beach Boys' "Little Saint Nick." The Beach Boys are wretched in and of themselves, but I heard this dreck three times on my drive home after Thanksgiving, and it almost caused an accident each time.

1) "The Christmas Song" a.k.a. "Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire." This is the one that stands out for me presently. It's the one that's playing everywhere I go, galling me with its insipid blandness. **** you, "Christmas Song." **** you.

That's it for the moment. The season's still young, so "Baby It's Cold Outside" or one of TSO's blended crap-fests could still make a run for the gold.

#5 - You clearly haven't heard the Harry Connick, Jr, version.

#4 - I hate that piece of crap tune

#3 - see comment from #5

#2 - The Muppets ROCK this tune. It's not Christmas until you hear Animal shouting RUN REINDEER RUNRUNRUN. Same comment goes for Jingle Bell Rock.

#1 - wait... you're a Communist. ;)


Wham! - Last Christmas


This tune makes me want to punch someone in the face.


Does this abortion count?

SXh7JR9oKVE

If by "abortion" you mean "fairly well-done performance of one of THE most famous pieces of classical music EVER", then yes. Y'all need some damn culture up in here.

[batonrougesooner]

I still vote for the stupid BC Clark jingle.

Even had a thread about it a few years ago.

[SoonerStormchaser]

I still vote for the stupid BC Clark jingle.

Even had a thread about it a few years ago.

^^^THIS^^^

This is about the only thing positive I can find about being deployed right now...I don't have to hear this ****ing song! I just hope I get to fly on Christmas day to avoid the inevitable demoralizing celebrations going on on the ground here.

[Ctina]

"Grandma got run over by a Reindeer" makes me want to disembowel the writer of said crap.

I knew I liked you. It was cute the first few times I heard it.. Then I was done.


Does this abortion count?



I knew I didn't like you.


This one is my favorite:

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[waynepayne]

Wham! - Last Christmas

E8gmARGvPlI

YOU TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW!

It isnt Christmas till I hear that song on the radio.

[SoonerStormchaser]

Lath Chrithmath...I gave you mah heart...buth the very nexth day...you gave it away...

[Harry Beanbag]

I've always detested this one.

6Jy4X87fDk4

[Adrian]

I still vote for the stupid BC Clark jingle.

Even had a thread about it a few years ago.


You'll be glad to know they've shot a new version of this with all new singers...

[soonerbrat]

"I want a hippopotamus for Christmas" is the most annoying song EVAR, counting all songs and not just Christmas ones.

[SilliSooner]

"I want a hippopotamus for Christmas" is the most annoying song EVAR, counting all songs and not just Christmas ones.

That was an Oklahoma City Zoo based song. And it went national. Need I remind?

[The]

All xmas songs are loathsome and fearful.

Except this song. It rules.

HzvQr8fidLo

[stoops the eternal pimp]

the only christmas song i like is the run dmc one

[Thaumaturge]

All xmas songs are loathsome and fearful.

Except this song. It rules.

HzvQr8fidLo

I've always said what a pity it was that John Denver went and blew up in that plane.

[The]

I've always said what a pity it was that John Denver went and blew up in that plane.

DeNed.

[OUMallen]

I think "Baby, It's Cold Outside" is a rape narrative.




I really can't stay
(but baby it's cold outside)
I've got to go away
(but baby it's cold outside)
This evening has been
(been hoping that you'd drop in)
So very nice
(i'll hold your hands, they're just like ice)
My mother will start worry
(beautiful whats your hurry)
My father will be pacing the floor
(listen to the fireplace roar)
So really i'd better scurry
(beautiful please don't hurry)
but maybe just a half a drink more
(put some records on while i pour)
the neighbors might faint
(baby it's bad out there)
say what's in this drink
(no cabs to be had out there)
i wish i knew how
(your eyes are like starlight now)
to break this spell
(i'll take your hat, your hair looks swell)
i ought to say "no, no, no sir"
(mind if i move in closer)
at least i'm gonna say that i tried
(what's the sense in hurtin' my pride)
i really can't stay
(oh baby don't hold out)

both:baby it's cold out side

i simply must go
(but baby it's cold outside)
the answer is no
(but baby it's cold outside)
your welcome has been
(how lucky that you droped in)
so nice and warm
(look out the window at that storm)
my sister will be suspicious
(gosh your lips look delicious)
my brother will be there at the door
(waves upon the tropical shore)
my maiden aunts mind is vicious
(gosh your lips are delicous)
but maybe just a cigarette more
(never such a blizzard before)
i've gotta get home
(but baby you'd freeze out there)
say lend me a coat
(it's up to your knees out there)
you've really been grand
(i thrill when you touch my hand)
but don't you see?
(how can you do this thing to me?)
there's bound to be talk tomorrow
(think of my lifelong sorrow)
at least there will be plenty implied
(if you got namonia and died)
i really can't stay
(get over that old out)

both:baby it's cold
baby it's cold outside




I mean, basically, this would make a great vignette for "no means no" for college freshmen.

[soonerbrat]

That was an Oklahoma City Zoo based song. And it went national. Need I remind?

and that matters because......

[Pricetag]

I can't stand Christmas songs that try to make the listener sad. My least favorite of that type is the "If Mommy Meets Jesus Tonight" one.

[OUthunder]

Lady Gaga trashed a XMas song last year. I heard it this year on the radio and almost smashed the radio.

Another one is The twelve days of xmas...not the song itself but the version by a group called, straight no chaser...god, that was horrible.

[Thaumaturge]

Another one is The twelve days of xmas...not the song itself but the version by a group called, straight no chaser...god, that was horrible.

If that song were a face, I'd punch it in the balls.

[Harry Beanbag]

Another one is The twelve days of xmas...not the song itself but the version by a group called, straight no chaser...god, that was horrible.


I'm not sure there's anything straight about that group. Hopefully, Robert E. Lee is forced to listen to that nonstop in his boiling pit of molten feces. :)

[soonerchk]

I knew I liked you. It was cute the first few times I heard it.. Then I was done.



I knew I didn't like you.


This one is my favorite:

KMfcfYcIDbg&feature

If they make one about a llama, I'm in.


YOU TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW!

It isnt Christmas till I hear that song on the radio.

Agreed. Love that song, you haters can suck it.

[soonerbrat]

my favorite Christmas song is "Christmas Wrapping" by the Waitresses.

[NormanPride]

Oh my God that ****ing Christmas shoes song makes my ears bleed. That is the worst song ever conceived and it goes on FOREVER.

[Harry Beanbag]

my favorite Christmas song is "Christmas Wrapping" by the Waitresses.


:mad:

[soonerchk]

Oh my God that ****ing Christmas shoes song makes my ears bleed. That is the worst song ever conceived and it goes on FOREVER.

I have no idea what this is, and I'm kind of hoping I never find out.

[hipsterdoofus]

I'm a huge Beatles fan...that being said, the Paul Mac song sucks. As far as Christmas songs goes, its just too dated by the instrumentation and such.

[soonerbrat]

:mad:

why you mad at me? i'm not a sappy christmas song lover.

[cantwait48]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2oPio60mK4

if you don't like this Christmas song you can take off hoser

[afs]

Oh my God that ****ing Christmas shoes song makes my ears bleed. That is the worst song ever conceived and it goes on FOREVER.

Agree. The wife and I call radio stations to complain after they play it.

[afs]

Also:

Dominick the Italian Christmas Donkey.

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[soonerchk]

How bad can a song about shoes really be?

[Thaumaturge]

How bad can a song about shoes really be?

It's not about the shoes. They're just a plot device.

It's about a child's dying mother, and it's sickening bullcrap.

[soonerchk]

It's not about the shoes. They're just a plot device.

It's about a child's dying mother, and it's sickening bullcrap.

Add those writers to the disembowel list.

[SoonerAtKU]

Christmas Shoes by a mile. The only other one that registers is "Last Christmas". Not even the original, but it seems like every year some idiotic band/bland singer has to put out their version, and it gets worse every time.

[afs]

VNsvE33pRSw

[Adrian]

"Santa Baby": the woman singing this is a whore, and Santa is a lecherous old fool. I'm beginning to think that "hurry down the chimney" is a metaphor too...

[Harry Beanbag]

why you mad at me? i'm not a sappy christmas song lover.

http://www.soonerfans.com/forums/showpost.php?p=3062915&postcount=17

;)

[The]

"Santa Baby": the woman singing this is a whore, and Santa is a lecherous old fool. I'm beginning to think that "hurry down the chimney" is a metaphor too...

Why don't you like anal sex?

[soonerchk]

"Santa Baby": the woman singing this is a whore, and Santa is a lecherous old fool. I'm beginning to think that "hurry down the chimney" is a metaphor too...

Regular whore or a dirty whore?

afs, I'm not going to listen to that. I don't need to hear about any people dying to make my holidays bright.

[TUSooner]

Does this abortion count?

SXh7JR9oKVE

You are so much more than wrong.

[TUSooner]

"Little Drummer Boy" and its rumpapumpums has always annoyed me.




"The Christmas Song" is awesome good as a Christmas song and just as a song. Mel Torme knew some musical stuff.

The full version of "Jungle Bells" is actually pretty neat. You could think of it as an old, old school rowdy song.

[OUmillenium]

This is great stuff!

I like Christmas songs.

I love more modern stuff like the Run DMC song in DieHard, McKenzie bros, Christmas Vacation Theme but not any of the current stuff you guys are ragging on like Lady Gaga or whatever.

What is your opinion of Mariah Carey's Christmas stuff? I'm not sure on like or dislike.

[NormanPride]

VNsvE33pRSw

This song needs to DIAF.

[Harry Beanbag]

That is pretty terrible.

[cantwait48]

was that rob lowe driving the car in Christmas Shoes?

I forgot about Last Christmas by Wham, I hate that song but can't get it out of my head whenever I hear it.

[Bourbon St Sooner]

I still vote for the stupid BC Clark jingle.

Even had a thread about it a few years ago.

Most sales are after Christmas

But Clark's is just before

Most everything is marked way down

Savings you can't ignore

[SoonerAtKU]

This is great stuff!

I like Christmas songs.

I love more modern stuff like the Run DMC song in DieHard, McKenzie bros, Christmas Vacation Theme but not any of the current stuff you guys are ragging on like Lady Gaga or whatever.

What is your opinion of Mariah Carey's Christmas stuff? I'm not sure on like or dislike.

I think it's funny that our idea of "modern stuff" is over 20 years old at this point.

[I Am Right]

anything sang by lady gaga

[Leroy Lizard]

Any Christmas song "sassed up" by the singer gets my Most Loathsome Vote.

Two types of singers are particularly bad for this:

1. Black soul singers.
2. 1950s era crooners.

"Jiiiingle, jingle jingle jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle allllllllll the waaaaay!" (Shots ring out.)

[Adrian]

Regular whore or a dirty whore?

afs, I'm not going to listen to that. I don't need to hear about any people dying to make my holidays bright.

"Think of all the fellas I haven't kissed."
Santa has lots of competition with this one. He'll need to take a number...

[afs]

Heard this gem on the way to work today:

DH2Xvkuxh70

[soonerchk]

I think it's funny that our idea of "modern stuff" is over 20 years old at this point.

Geez. I'll be over here with my walker complaining about the kids on my lawn.

[GottaHavePride]

What is your opinion of Mariah Carey's Christmas stuff? I'm not sure on like or dislike.

It needs to die in a fire also.

[tcrb]

IMO the worst Christmas song ever: Feliz Navidad

Tip: Dont click the link unless you want the damn thing will be stuck in your head for at least the next 16 hours.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMtuVP8Mj4o

[soonerchk]

IMO the worst Christmas song ever: Feliz Navidad

Tip: Dont click the link unless you want the damn thing will be stuck in your head for at least the next 16 hours.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMtuVP8Mj4o

It already got stuck the second you mentioned it. :mad:

[afs]

It already got stuck the second you mentioned it. :mad:


This will help you forget it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NA90IlymdZ4

[3rdgensooner]

yibz4xAejos

[RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!]

"Grandma got run over by a Reindeer" makes me want to disembowel the writer of said crap.Followed closely by "I want a hippopotamus for Christmas", and "Have a holly jolly Christmas"

[2121Sooner]

This one was always really uplifting.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5cX_ncZLls

[SpankyNek]

Carol of the Bells...and not even close for me.

[2121Sooner]

Best evah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OR07r0ZMFb8