Harry Beanbag
8/31/2010, 03:00 PM
> THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER
>
> This one is a little different ...
> Two Different Versions ...
> Two Different Morals
>
> OLD VERSION:
>
> The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
> house and laying up supplies for the winter.
>
> The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays
> the summer away.
>
> Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
>
> The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.
>
> MORAL OF THE OLD STORY:
>
> Be responsible for yourself!
>
> MODERN VERSION:
>
> The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long,
> building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
>
> The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays
> the summer away.
>
> Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands
> to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is
> cold and starving.
>
> CBS, NBC , PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering
> grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table
> filled with food.
>
> America is stunned by the sharp contrast.
>
> How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is
> allowed to suffer so?
>
> Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and everybody cries
> when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green...'
>
> ACORN stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news
> stations film the group singing, “We shall overcome.”
>
> Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray for the
> grasshopper's sake.
>
> President Obama condems the ant and blames President Bush, President
> Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the Pope for the grasshopper's plight.
>
> Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the
> ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an
> immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.
>
> Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act
> retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
>
> The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs
> and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is
> confiscated by the Government Green Czar and given to the grasshopper.
>
> The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends
> finishing up the last bits of the ant’s food while the government house he
> is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house,
> crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn't maintain it.
>
> The ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.
>
> The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house,
> now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the
> ramshackle, once prosperous and peaceful, neighborhood.
>
> The entire Nation collapses bringing the rest of the free world with it.
>
> MORAL OF THE STORY:
>
> Be careful how you vote in 2010.
>
> This one is a little different ...
> Two Different Versions ...
> Two Different Morals
>
> OLD VERSION:
>
> The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
> house and laying up supplies for the winter.
>
> The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays
> the summer away.
>
> Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
>
> The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.
>
> MORAL OF THE OLD STORY:
>
> Be responsible for yourself!
>
> MODERN VERSION:
>
> The ant works hard in the withering heat and the rain all summer long,
> building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
>
> The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays
> the summer away.
>
> Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands
> to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while he is
> cold and starving.
>
> CBS, NBC , PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering
> grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table
> filled with food.
>
> America is stunned by the sharp contrast.
>
> How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is
> allowed to suffer so?
>
> Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper and everybody cries
> when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green...'
>
> ACORN stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news
> stations film the group singing, “We shall overcome.”
>
> Then Rev. Jeremiah Wright has the group kneel down to pray for the
> grasshopper's sake.
>
> President Obama condems the ant and blames President Bush, President
> Reagan, Christopher Columbus, and the Pope for the grasshopper's plight.
>
> Nancy Pelosi & Harry Reid exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the
> ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an
> immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.
>
> Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act
> retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
>
> The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs
> and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is
> confiscated by the Government Green Czar and given to the grasshopper.
>
> The story ends as we see the grasshopper and his free-loading friends
> finishing up the last bits of the ant’s food while the government house he
> is in, which, as you recall, just happens to be the ant's old house,
> crumbles around them because the grasshopper doesn't maintain it.
>
> The ant has disappeared in the snow, never to be seen again.
>
> The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident, and the house,
> now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the
> ramshackle, once prosperous and peaceful, neighborhood.
>
> The entire Nation collapses bringing the rest of the free world with it.
>
> MORAL OF THE STORY:
>
> Be careful how you vote in 2010.