This Pirate Carp is gettin outta hand, [Archive]

olevetonahill

4/14/2009, 07:45 AM

Heres My Solution.
Ive thot about this . Seems those focktards have taken 3 more ships .
Heres The Plan
Park a small group of ships off their coast one of em being a small carrier. with Apaches and a few f18s or whatever.
Tell the ****ers there is Now a 5 Mile Non approach area.
Anyone or thing that gets within 5 miles of any Ship is Gonna get their asses Blown away .
Then Charge a per ship fee to protect their asses . Kinda like the Panama Canal .

What I win ?

badger

4/14/2009, 07:55 AM

If Mike Leach hadn't just signed a new Tekk contract, he might sail out there to join in the fun

OUDoc

4/14/2009, 08:02 AM

And I thought people hated being shot in the head.
Whatever makes them happy.

Harry Beanbag

4/14/2009, 08:04 AM

I say every time they take over a ship it immediately gets sunk. Eventually they'll get the hint that they'll be dying instead of collecting ransoms.

olevetonahill

4/14/2009, 08:08 AM

That could get pretty spensive harry.
Just charge the shippin Company's a fee fer safe Passage .
then Blast the Pirates outta the water if they get closer than the 5 miles

TheHumanAlphabet

4/14/2009, 08:25 AM

Okay, some great naval strategery people please tell me why we aren't organizing convoys through these waters and blowing up these pirate motherships and small boats out of the water? k/plzthx.

EDIT: Apparently the Chinese Navy is escorting their flagged merchant vessels through these waters. They are setting up small convoys of 3 or more ships and escorting them.

Also, I wonder in the Marine Hymn will add "to the shores of Somalia" to their song in the near future. You know the "to the shores of Tripoli" was to fight the Barbary Priates that were pirating our flagged vessels back in 1815 or so. Marines went in and took care of the Barbary pirates back then.

TUSooner

4/14/2009, 08:50 AM

This situation calls for the revival of Letters of Marque and Reprisal.

SoonerTroll

4/14/2009, 08:55 AM

I say bomb the stronghold on the land, blow there ill begotten mansions off the face of the earth.

olevetonahill

4/14/2009, 08:57 AM

This situation calls for the revival of Letters of Marque and Reprisal.

Splane please ?

badger

4/14/2009, 09:22 AM

I say every time they take over a ship it immediately gets sunk. Eventually they'll get the hint that they'll be dying instead of collecting ransoms.

That's an interesting thought... just like our secret agents have pills to mimic death (or actual death), what if our cargo boats had the same?

1890MilesToNorman

4/14/2009, 09:47 AM

I heard last night that the ship owners carry ransom insurance on their ships. This is why there is usually no killing and stuff, the pirates know this and want a smooth transaction. Just what I heard but I know nuttin.

TUSooner

4/14/2009, 09:58 AM

Splane please ?

A Letter of Marque was basically a government's commission to a private party to go engage in naval shenanigans (seize, sink, burn, etc) against an enemy's ships. It probably wouldn't really work these days, because I'm not sure how these "privateers" would get paid enough to make their efforts worthwhile. But the thought of some free-lance anti-pirates in tricked-out private war boats kicking-@ss (with or without taking names) just sounds like a good thing.

Okla-homey

4/14/2009, 10:02 AM

Splane please ?

Letters of marque, among other things, were essentially warrants issued by the government to private ship owners (a/k/a "privateers") to "go do that voo doo that they do so well" to the extent they were authorized to kick the bootay of pirates and other maritime law breakers. IOW, mercenaries-of-the-sea.

Summarizing, if a bunch of bad-a$$es bought a ship, and the government issued the skipper a letter of marque, they could sail around and sort this stuff out and be compensated by being permitted to keep a share of the booty.

StoopTroup

4/14/2009, 10:05 AM

I say we take back control of the Panama Canal and take control of the Suez Canal. The fees we collect from there will more than pay for the safe passage we will give to the ships that pass.

I'm thinking it won't be long before we have the same problem in Panama.

1890MilesToNorman

4/14/2009, 10:08 AM

We need to start building an Ark on the hill and go out and get us some of that booty stuff. How far are you from the ocean Vet?

olevetonahill

4/14/2009, 10:09 AM

Well Im taking names
who all wants to sign up ?
Lets Go kick some pirate Booty :D

Collier11

4/14/2009, 10:11 AM

I didnt read the entire thread so this may have already been mentioned but why dont they arm the crew of these ships?

1890MilesToNorman

4/14/2009, 10:12 AM

Count me in, I can drive a party boat with the best of'em.

1890MilesToNorman

4/14/2009, 10:14 AM

I didnt read the entire thread so this may have already been mentioned but why dont they arm the crew of these ships?

The ships owners are concerned with the liability, something else I heard but I know nuttin.

Collier11

4/14/2009, 10:33 AM

well if thats the case then they need to get over it, just give one or two people acess to guns, do whatever you have to IMHO

tommieharris91

4/14/2009, 10:58 AM

Arm the crew of the ships. This shouldn't become another war on drugs/poverty/terror/etc.

mxATVracer10

4/14/2009, 11:02 AM

The ships owners are concerned with the liability, something else I heard but I know nuttin.

I guess they are known to **** their crew mates off or something because all of them mention the fear of mutiny as reason for not carrying firearms on board...

1890MilesToNorman

4/14/2009, 11:14 AM

Quote from a Yahoo article
--------------
The four pirates who attacked the Alabama were between 17 and 19 years old, Defense Secretary Robert Gates said.

"Untrained teenagers with heavy weapons," Gates told students and faculty at the Marine Corps War College. "Everybody in the room knows the consequences of that."
-----------

So the youth of Somalia is causing all this carp to happen. Good thing we can't spank'em.

SeattleOUstudent

4/14/2009, 11:23 AM

I read that SpikeTV just announced yesterday that they are going to have a new reality show that actually follows the US Navy escort ships etc. Not kidding.

That will rock.

BudSooner

4/14/2009, 12:33 PM

I didnt read the entire thread so this may have already been mentioned but why dont they arm the crew of these ships?

Maritime Law forbids merchant ships from being armed. IIRC.

TUSooner

4/14/2009, 12:36 PM

***
Summarizing, if a bunch of bad-a$$es bought a ship, and the government issued the skipper a letter of marque, they could sail around and sort this stuff out and be compensated by being permitted to keep a share of the booty.

I'm afraid you've given some of our fellow posters some ideas that, if brought to fruition, would not end well.

Let me know when the privateer DRUNKYTOWN is seaworthy. I'll want to take out a Lloyd's policy. :D

Frozen Sooner

4/14/2009, 01:29 PM

I think that calling them "pirates" just subconsciously makes people not take them as seriously. An image of Jack Sparrow or whatnot comes to mind.

Perhaps if we called them something like "inseagents" people would take the problem more seriously. ;)

OU_Sooners75

4/14/2009, 01:49 PM

My .02!

Just nuke that ****ing country back to the stone age!

Collier11

4/14/2009, 01:52 PM

OU_Sooners75

4/14/2009, 01:54 PM

Grant amnesty to any Messican that wishes to be a member of the US....if and only if they go to Somalia and take care of this problem.

Then arm both sides with some of the best weapons!

We take care of two problems with one stone!

Frozen Sooner

4/14/2009, 02:00 PM

My .02!

Just nuke that ****ing country back to the stone age!

Exactly how far from the Stone Age do you think Somalia is right now?

OU_Sooners75

4/14/2009, 02:12 PM

Exactly how far from the Stone Age do you think Somalia is right now?

When I say stone age...I mean Stone age!!!!

http://www.cartoonstock.com/newscartoons/cartoonists/ksm/lowres/ksmn654l.jpg

or

http://ygraine.membrane.com/enterhtml/Sir_Vent/Dribbling_Rivalry/images/Stone_Age_Tools.jpg

BudSooner

4/14/2009, 02:24 PM

Exactly how far from the Stone Age do you think Somalia is right now?
Not very f'n far at all.

We need our scientists to create a Krakken, and then devise a system where the captain of a ship can call upon it to unleash it's fury on the bastards.

That, and in the Cotton Bowl. :D

"Split right, on two on two...avoid the creature with tentacles...."

Collier11

4/14/2009, 02:25 PM

OU_Sooners75

4/14/2009, 02:32 PM

which is different from present day somalia how???

http://www.thewe.cc/thewei/_/images11/somalia/resistance_fighters_somalia.jpe

http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2007/11/19/world/20somalia.600.jpg

http://www.vulkaner.no/n/africa/somalia/somalia1.jpg

http://www.irw.org/images/campaigns/somalia_crisis.jpg

Guns vs. Rocks...guns tend to win.

They are not very modernized, I know. But I think everyone understands what I am trying to get at. ;)

olevetonahill

4/14/2009, 04:18 PM

I'm afraid you've given some of our fellow posters some ideas that, if brought to fruition, would not end well.

Let me know when the privateer DRUNKYTOWN is seaworthy. I'll want to take out a Lloyd's policy. :D

The Posse is organizing as I type :D
Lotts gonna be the Boat driver
I dont care what everyone else does as long as i get to shoot the weapons :D

AlbqSooner

4/14/2009, 08:26 PM

I didnt read the entire thread so this may have already been mentioned but why dont they arm the crew of these ships?

In addition to what has been mentioned before, there are many ports around the world where armed vessels are not allowed absent a previously entered into memorandum of understanding.

As for Marque and Reprisal, I guess that it is to be expected that a Tulane alum ensconsced in the Fifth Circuit in NOLA would bring Maritime terminology to the SO.;)

sooner_born_1960

4/14/2009, 08:28 PM

The Posse is organizing as I type :D
Lotts gonna be the Boat driver
I dont care what everyone else does as long as i get to shoot the weapons :D

Before I commit, there is an open bar, right?

olevetonahill

4/14/2009, 08:33 PM

Before I commit, there is an open bar, right?

Well DUH
This is the posse ya know :D
Booze and Blowing **** up
Good times

tommieharris91

4/14/2009, 08:45 PM

Well DUH
This is the posse ya know :D
Booze and Blowing **** up
Good times

Uhh we might have to ration depending on how long we're gonna be at sea. If it's only like a week at a time or so, then we could load up enough likker to be drunken sailors all the time.

olevetonahill

4/14/2009, 08:55 PM

Gonna have to have 2 Boats
1 unarmed sos it can make it into port to get Supplies and **** the other to blow **** up with .:D

Curly Bill

4/14/2009, 10:10 PM

Well Im taking names
who all wants to sign up ?
Lets Go kick some pirate Booty :D

You know I'm in! :D

olevetonahill

4/14/2009, 10:39 PM

You know I'm in! :D

Well we gots a Boat driver and 2 Gun folks
Just need some Bartenders and Servin wenches we be set :D

Curly Bill

4/14/2009, 10:44 PM

Well we gots a Boat driver and 2 Gun folks
Just need some Bartenders and Servin wenches we be set :D

We gotta get Crux to design us a flag.

olevetonahill

4/14/2009, 10:48 PM

We gotta get Crux to design us a flag.

Ok Cru is the Flag waver dude
Reckon we can get Homey and Frag mag to fly the Planes ?
Im a Pilot But I dont wanta fly drunk :D

Curly Bill

4/14/2009, 10:51 PM

Ok Cru is the Flag waver dude
Reckon we can get Homey and Frag mag to fly the Planes ?
Im a Pilot But I dont wanta fly drunk :D

I wanna be a gunner and shoot stuff, but in the Navy I was a crypto dude -- so's I can handle the Top Secret communications we'll be needing to make. :D

olevetonahill

4/14/2009, 11:13 PM

I wanna be a gunner and shoot stuff, but in the Navy I was a crypto dude -- so's I can handle the Top Secret communications we'll be needing to make. :D

I done said Yer a shooter
Pay tention
But ya you can tro down the Gang signs Iffen ya want to :D

Curly Bill

4/14/2009, 11:14 PM

I done said Yer a shooter
Pay tention
But ya you can tro down the Gang signs Iffen ya want to :D

I know, I just didn't want ya thinkin I don't wanna shoot stuff, cause I do. :D

theresonly1OU

4/14/2009, 11:17 PM

I heard a great idea on MSNBC by their military analyst that said we should sign a multinational agreement with both all nations who have interest in keeping their boats free from piracy, and, through said agreement, require all boats traveling in pre-determined high risk areas to submit the equivalent of a flight plan. All boats found in these high risk areas who don't submit plans will be summarily sunk.

Not a bad start.

Crucifax Autumn

4/14/2009, 11:17 PM

http://www.hotchyx.com/adult-image-hosting-05/3251Pirate-Carp.jpg

LosAngelesSooner

4/14/2009, 11:29 PM

I can supply the grenades and rocket launchers.

And a fine selection of whiskeys....

soonerscuba

4/14/2009, 11:31 PM

Being a pirate sucks ***. (http://www.slate.com/id/2205664/entry/2205666/)

Curly Bill

4/14/2009, 11:32 PM

I can supply the grenades and rocket launchers.

And a fine selection of whiskeys....

Seems like I've heard somewhere that you knew where a person could get their hands on some fine weaponry. ;) :D

...and whiskey is good too.

Ardmore_Sooner

4/14/2009, 11:50 PM

I wish Pompey the Great was still alive. There's a guy who knew how to take out pirates.

Tulsa_Fireman

4/14/2009, 11:51 PM

http://members.cox.net/firemanat25s/gwbpirate.jpg

Fight fire with fire, baby!

olevetonahill

4/15/2009, 12:04 AM

I can supply the grenades and rocket launchers.

And a fine selection of whiskeys....

Just bring the Guns Boy
I got the Whiskey handled :rolleyes:

tommieharris91

4/15/2009, 12:52 AM

OU_Sooners75

4/15/2009, 01:48 AM

Count me in. I can be a shooter or a battering ram....or both!

Actually I can be the Donk! (Crocodile Dundee reference)

olevetonahill

4/15/2009, 02:03 AM

Count me in. I can be a shooter or a battering ram....or both!

Actually I can be the Donk! (Crocodile Dundee reference)

So we can
Fill yer head with Cannon Balls and Powder yer behind ?
and when we set the Powder off Ya Gonna lose yer Mind

OU_Sooners75

4/15/2009, 02:17 AM

So we can
Fill yer head with Cannon Balls and Powder yer behind ?
and when we set the Powder off Ya Gonna lose yer Mind

Sounds kinky!

I lost my mind a long time ago though!