Ban One Sooner
1/7/2009, 11:22 PM
Leading experts in the field of particle physics have recently been engaged in an embittered debate concerning what has become known as "the Tebow effect". When analyzing University of Florida quarterback Tim Tebow's combined mass and velocity when carrying the football concern has arisen that the consequences for creating unstable matter with bizarre ethereal properties may exist when Tebow collides with members of the University of Oklahoma's defense during Thursday night's upcoming championship game.
The resulting formation of unstable and perhaps catastrophic matter, which may include formation of quazars, blackholes and flying clouds of sh*t that may result in destruction of the planet, the solar system and the known universe. Similar effects are just now being studied in multi-billion dollar particle colliders throughout the world. The effects are similar to what happened in the first few nanoseconds following the Big Bang, which is largely thought to be the event that led to the creation of the universe.
When asked to comment Tebow had this to say "I'm actually hoping it's true. I would love to have the chance to motivate beings from other universes and compete and inspire people in parallel worlds."
Leading expert in the field of PlayStation, John Blake, had this to say "If I would have had just one more year at Oklahoma, I would have recruited Tim. He was one of the kidth I had my eye on".
When combined with the effects of Tebow's heart, intensity and what has become a curious X-factor, known throughout the community of physicists as the "calming up effect", as curious phenomena has been observed in humans exposed to the combined phenomena associated with Tebow. Alarm has been generated as the after effects seem to inhibit tendencies typically associated with those seen during unsuccessful drunken lobotomies.
Teammate and linebacker Spikes has been the case in point. When asked to comment concerning the effects of such phenomena, he was observed to have been too stupid to carry on legitimate conversation but there was some debate as to the source of his ignorance which could also be attributed to the beatdown he is about to receive over previous disparaging comments he uttered throughout the week regarding the University of Oklahoma, its players, the Big XII Conference and most of the other football teams in the country.
Coach Urban Meyer was asked to comment but declined, siting on-going conversations with the University of Notre Dame.
The resulting formation of unstable and perhaps catastrophic matter, which may include formation of quazars, blackholes and flying clouds of sh*t that may result in destruction of the planet, the solar system and the known universe. Similar effects are just now being studied in multi-billion dollar particle colliders throughout the world. The effects are similar to what happened in the first few nanoseconds following the Big Bang, which is largely thought to be the event that led to the creation of the universe.
When asked to comment Tebow had this to say "I'm actually hoping it's true. I would love to have the chance to motivate beings from other universes and compete and inspire people in parallel worlds."
Leading expert in the field of PlayStation, John Blake, had this to say "If I would have had just one more year at Oklahoma, I would have recruited Tim. He was one of the kidth I had my eye on".
When combined with the effects of Tebow's heart, intensity and what has become a curious X-factor, known throughout the community of physicists as the "calming up effect", as curious phenomena has been observed in humans exposed to the combined phenomena associated with Tebow. Alarm has been generated as the after effects seem to inhibit tendencies typically associated with those seen during unsuccessful drunken lobotomies.
Teammate and linebacker Spikes has been the case in point. When asked to comment concerning the effects of such phenomena, he was observed to have been too stupid to carry on legitimate conversation but there was some debate as to the source of his ignorance which could also be attributed to the beatdown he is about to receive over previous disparaging comments he uttered throughout the week regarding the University of Oklahoma, its players, the Big XII Conference and most of the other football teams in the country.
Coach Urban Meyer was asked to comment but declined, siting on-going conversations with the University of Notre Dame.