Red River Haiku

[ouwasp]

Austin laments Colt
He was horns leading rusher
Out with concussion

[olevetonahill]

Not funny.

[BornandBred]

Oklahoma wins
Sam throws for 7 TDs
Bradford wins Heisman

[OU86]

"Will Muschamp is god."
OU not Rice. Another
message board meltdown.

[OUmillenium]

Macky clappy clap
Doesn't work without the Vince
Sooners roll the whorns

[OUmillenium]

OU quarterbacks
From Texas under Bob Stoops
Do not beat the whorns

Thank you to Bradford
For being a native born
Okie quarterback

[OUmillenium]

5 to 0 start
Struggled to whorns in 2 games
Continue the streak

[BetterSoonerThanLater]

poor overhyped horns
led to believe their own hype
bevo kills himself

[StoopTroup]

Mack will attack
Won't work like last time
Bob wears the hat

[OU86]

Muschamp has a stroke.
Bevo steps in pony poop.
One more scoreboard pic.

[Lott's Bandana]

gurgling tummy
thought I had an autumn bug
better now flushed whorn

[cjames317]

It's about damn time.
Haiku smack, like controlled rage,
helps me feel like Jules.

[TMcGee86]

OU wins again.
Time to check the innerweb
Yup Whornfans is down

[badger]

Confession: Haven't written Haiku since elementary school, forgot proper format. Had to look it up. Here's what I found:
http://i34.tinypic.com/10s8aba.jpg

Linky (http://www.wikihow.com/Write-a-Haiku-Poem)

:D

[badger]

Ok, here's my first crack at it in 20 years:

Burnt orange color here
You are so ugly to me
Why do you exist?

[SbOrOiNaEnR]

BAMF DE Auston
Knocks Colt McCoy on his @$$
Texas season DONE!

[Lott's Bandana]

Confession: Haven't written Haiku since elementary school, forgot proper format. Had to look it up. Here's what I found:
http://i34.tinypic.com/10s8aba.jpg

Linky (http://www.wikihow.com/Write-a-Haiku-Poem)

:D

Reminds me of a woman I've dated that ends each fortune cookie quote by saying, "...in bed."

Can be funny.

"Much happiness coming your way." (in bed)
"Explore all avenues of opportunity." (in bed)

Two recent ones.

She says all her GF's do this. Anyone else heard of this silliness?

[badger]

Longhorn fan so large
Your butt crosses the 50
Move over, fatso

[Lott's Bandana]

Ok, here's my first crack at it in 20 years:

Burnt orange color
You are so ugly.
You exist why?

Hmmmm. How do I feel about knowing Badger just had sex?

20 years girl...do it again!

:D

[cjames317]

Eff the "feelings" chit.
Texas University
Longhorns suck, suck, suck.

[OUmillenium]

Reminds me of a woman I've dated that ends each fortune cookie quote by saying, "...in bed."

Can be funny.

"Much happiness coming your way." (in bed)
"Explore all avenues of opportunity." (in bed)

Two recent ones.

She says all her GF's do this. Anyone else heard of this silliness?

yep, that is old...NOT an ancient chinese secret

[soonerx]

State Fair Cotton Bowl
Sea of crimson and orange
Bad combination

[badger]

Hell, you give to us?
But, there's no fight in Texas.
So, you suck again.

[Lott's Bandana]

yep, that is old...NOT an ancient chinese secret

I guess I don't buy enough Asian meals...

[StoopTroup]

**** YOU You ****ing WHORN
Kiss my Crimson A$$ you ****ing loser
Seeya next year muther ****er

[OklahomaRed]

OU wears Crimson
Crimson is superior to orange in the spectrum
Texas wears burnt orange

There, is that "natural enough for you? :D

[badger]

Your eyes upon us
Now as we rain upon you
Gabriel's horn blew.

[OUmillenium]

5
7
5

guys please, stick to the format

[badger]

5
7
5

guys please, stick to the format

Haiku is ancient and in another language, plus there were no rules established beforehand... except perhaps the sex link provided :)

[StoopTroup]

I changed post 25 for him anyway. :D

Dear Lord...I apologize for that one...please bless all the pygmies in Africa.

[badger]

I changed post 25 for him anyway. :D

I changed mine too, Troop.
But still say eff the format
UT doth suck, yes.

[StoopTroup]

I changed mine too, Troop.
But still say eff the format
UT doth suck, yes.

I'm done...I like mine the way it is...:D

[soonerx]

Whorn players must drive
Further than Oklahoma
Within their own state

[badger]

Corso, you moron
Silly, those mascot head things
Quickly pick Texas :mad:

[MikeInNorman]

Zone read, Colt, and then,
over and over again.
Concussion Boy's back.

[BermudaSooner]

Half Cotton Empty
Mack Brown Claps and Claps and Claps
Any horns hear it

[soonerx]

Colt gallups graceful
Like his namesake, until SMACK
Oh hi, meet Reynolds

[Half a Hundred]

The stands split in half
Red and orange beginning
Red and silver end

[badger]

Huge ferris wheel high
You spin above distantly
Nah, need coney dog

[Half a Hundred]

Eight o'clock drinking
Fletcher's corny dogs and beer
Three o'clock puking

[badger]

Eleven a.m.
You come so early today
Oh well, drunk sooner!

[Half a Hundred]

Two for the Heisman
One leaves the game in the lead
Neither eats boogers

[ouwasp]

October weekend
The football world is watching
Bevo cries again...

[Half a Hundred]

On this Saturday
The burnt orange number twelve
Will be painted red

[OKC-SLC]

The stands split in half
Red and orange beginning
Red and silver end

Nice one.

[UberSooner]

Texas loves their bull
His b***s no longer sway
Daddy Mack, same way

[Half a Hundred]

Small sliver of red
Cheers loud in the north endzone
In silenced orange

[Jason White's Third Knee]

The Crimson and Cream
Run off all of the longhorns
Blue and white seats left

[badger]

1,2,3,4,5
1,2,3,4,5,6,7
Flag Aggies, 12 men.

EDIT: I know it's not RRS, but I am making fun of the 5-7-5 specified format :D

[Half a Hundred]

Yellow flag in air
Yet another sad retreat
False start, south endzone

[Just A Visitor Here]

Sooners will not lose
Another BCS bowl
Cause they won't be there

[badger]

The play is under
Review, and I will boo you
Ref, you really suck.

[Just A Visitor Here]

Crimson tears will stain
The highway back to Norman
Wasted Texas trip

[Just A Visitor Here]

Poor Sammy Bradford
Two big losses Saturday
Heisman and the game

[Half a Hundred]

Horns come on our board
Have no haiku skill at all
Wasting all our time

[Just A Visitor Here]

No gas to steal here
No jackets to abscond with
Sooners hate Dallas

[sooneron]

Clap clap Clap Whine Whine
Old yeller teeth looking sad
Texas fans leaving

[Just A Visitor Here]

Dirty children cry
Trailer parks are empty now
Sooners on TV

[Just A Visitor Here]

Sooner fans refrain
"That last nash'nul champeenship
Seems so long ago"

[Half a Hundred]

Just A Visitor
Who's alt could you ever be?
No one is that dumb

[MikeInNorman]

Midway and Game Day.
Fletcher's, warm beer, Cotton Bowl.
Smells like.......Victory.

[ouwasp]

Texas boys will watch
As Sooners pound horns again
Another top class!

[MikeInNorman]

If Mack claps his hands
In an empty Cotton Bowl
Does it make a sound?

[MikeInNorman]

Horns curse Greg Davis
While sunburned, sweaty, leaving.
Ah, schadenfreude.

[soonerx]

In Texas they say
Everything is bigger
Including OU

[soonerx]

Colt McCoy is proud
He is no longer a boy
Bevo's lips are sealed

[Just A Visitor Here]

Just A Visitor
Who's alt could you ever be?
No one is that dumb

My rhymes are so sweet
My haiku skills fantastic
Sooner please don't cry

[Just A Visitor Here]

Half a Hundred points
Half a Hundred felonies
A proud history

[Flagstaffsooner]

Not haiku but

Roses are red
Violets are blue
If Colt ate boogers
He'd be at MU

[sooneron]

whorn playaz rolling
down the road past APD
contraband holding

[the_ouskull]

How's about Sonnet 18?

Shall I compare Tejas to a piece of crap?
They are more vile, and more odiferous.
Foul gums do flap throughout October days,
until we once again prove their defense porous.

the_ouskull

[OUstud]

Light blue seats or not
Come midway second quarter
Their side will be bare!

[OU86]

Horns - Like Baylor U
Nearly even after first
giving up 28.

"OU holds. OU
holds. We see it even if
Nobody else does."

[cjames317]

Horns sell their tickets
when they learn, just like Navin,
"It's a profit deal!"

[soonerx]

When all's said 'n done
UT's stadium honors
An OU player

[76soonergrad]

I haven't been on here in a long time, but here goes:

OU, immortal,
leviathan existence.
Texas?
Unhinged, unwhorned,
unhooked---
least resistence.

[StoopTroup]

Shootout River Red October 11th
Road Flares Big Tex Gasoline soaked rags
Huge Poop Tower Gloriously Flaming

[Half a Hundred]

How's about Sonnet 18?

Shall I compare Tejas to a piece of crap?
They are more vile, and more odiferous.
Foul gums do flap throughout October days,
until we once again prove their defense porous.

the_ouskull

No matter what the scoreboard 'ere shall say
OU is the best and Texas is gay

[froneal]

"Oh no! We're winning!"
Brian Britt has a good plan:
"Play 'Eyes of Texas!'"

[mdklatt]

Burnt orange jerseys
match color of Bevo's turds
and 'horns play like ****.

[mdklatt]

Second Saturday
in October. Clap clap clap!
Texas is losing.

[mdklatt]

I've been working on
your sister, all the live-long
day. I've been working....

[mdklatt]

Ready some corn dogs!
Texas fans fill up Fair Park
during third quarter.

[mdklatt]

'Horn fans with bad teeth
and giant belt buckles call
us "rednecks". Roll eyes.

[mdklatt]

Swimming and diving:
UT's championship sports.
Football? Not so much.

[SbOrOiNaEnR]

How about a limerick?

It's wonderful, that time of year.
The Red River Shootout is near.
The Sooners will roll,
In that old Cotton Bowl,
While 'Horns take it up in the rear.

[Half a Hundred]

How about a limerick?

It's wonderful, that time of year.
The Red River Shootout is near.
The Sooners will roll,
In that old Cotton Bowl,
While 'Horns take it up in the rear.

There once was a man from Austin
Whose losing bets on texass were costin'
Shot the bookie in a jam
Got caught on the lam
But has no problems with the salads he's tossin'

[SbOrOiNaEnR]

Mack Brown was a guy with a plan.
Thought up by the jobless Coach Fran.
He smiled and winced,
As he whispered to Vince,
"There's nothing like sex with a man."

[Half a Hundred]

I once knew a whorn from Terlingua
Whose voice, so much joy could bring ya'
Oh this man won't lie
But I didn't know it was so high
Being without balls when you sing, ya?

[badger]

Limerick time!

There once was a team coached by Mack
With players who talked lots of smack
But after we score
they talk trash no more
For they see that their mom's the... um... herbivore. ;)

[Jason White's Third Knee]

Half a Hundred points
Half a Hundred felonies
A proud history


Hi pot. Meet Kettle.
Gatewood, Henry, Joseph, Jones
Embarrassed yet noob?

[mOUse]

1 versus 5 game
Orange clad blitzer denied
Sam Slings for TD!

[OUstud]

LOL OU
Just scored another touchdown
Laugh like the Chatt. game

[DallasSooner87]

Colt runs from pocket
Gets destroyed by OU D
Texas fail again.

[swardboy]

Mack claps constantly
Bob wins overwhelmingly
Mack is the assclown.

[badger]

Lid won't bet with me
his avatar and his sig
Badgers feast on whorns

[StoopTroup]

Lid won't bet with me
his avatar and his sig
Badgers feast on whorns

He knows it all well
the bow tie wearing lame bald whorn
his face is all crimson scorned

[badger]

Traffic is to bad
Filled with Aggies and Longhorns
Go Texan on them

[OUmillenium]

Great job guys, these are hilarious...yet so factual

Word to the mommies
Bradford came to drop bombies
texass sux again

[badger]

"There's nothing like sex with a man."

:D:D:D:D:D truuuuuuue :D:D:D:D:D

Ok, another attempt at limericking it up:

There once was a QB named Colt
To Sooners, he is quite the dolt
They yell "Concussion Boy,
You're no real McCoy"
So run boy, here comes Phil Loadholt

[cjames317]

"I will answer that."
Says sMack, red-eyed and puffy.
"We'll learn from this loss."

[badger]

Oh tunnel entrance
Why must a curtain block us
From trashing Texas?

[Half a Hundred]

Oh Texas pom girls
Your chaps are so stunning, but
Your team still sucks, shame

[badger]

Dallas in Texas,
Why can't you be in OK?
1804? Right.

[Just A Visitor Here]

Hi pot. Meet Kettle.
Gatewood, Henry, Joseph, Jones
Embarrassed yet noob?

Poor guy doesn't know
His name means a male member
Hop along 3rd knee

[badger]

Greg Davis, you suck
No offense, no coaching, none.
I love Greg Davis.

[Half a Hundred]

Muschamp the new coach
The orange hope with fervor
Result the same: loss

[badger]

Gene Chizik in Ames,
Iowa you lose more now.
Miss Texas yet, Gene?

[cjames317]

"Big 12 Super Bowl,"
according to CFN.
That, plus New Year's Eve.

[badger]

"Holiday Bowl here
We come," proclaims Mack Brown the
Day after defeat

[budbarrybob]

Gridiron Classic
The Sooners Romp
Deafening the sound of Victory

[cjames317]

Muschamp bleeds crimson.
sMack idolizes Barry.
Horns think there's a chance?

[Bruiser53]

Need a state fair beer
Tastes so good at 10 AM
Damn out of tickets

[meoveryouxinfinity]

What was wrong with Colt?
Let me answer that for Chris
and for Colt too, Mack?

[meoveryouxinfinity]

Murray, Brown, or Madu
Texas has no running game
McCoy will not do.

[TUSooner]

Small sliver of red
Cheers loud in the north endzone
In silenced orange

That's two nice ones!

I mean, its like reel poitry and stuff.

[Half a Hundred]

The blue flag unfolds
Orange fans jeer incessant
For naught; OU wins

[Half a Hundred]

Autumn breeze sweeps through
A red and white flag flies midfield
All is right today

[SanDiegoSoonerGal]

Out here in Cali
I watch in my pajamas.
Too early to drink. :mad:

[A Sooner in Texas]

Out here in Cali
I watch in my pajamas.
Too early to drink. :mad:

Never too early
to toast a sure Sooner win.
Have a mimosa.

[ouwasp]

Obama, McCain
Nobody cares much right now
The Big Game is here.

[Half a Hundred]

Foot against leather
Leather against hand, then ground
Cheers roar from the red

[BigBoomerInBigD]

Sooners crush Longhorns
Here, Mack - have a corny dog
Consolation prize

[SleestakSooner]

Mack Brown is a clown
Wonder if he'll ever learn
Bob Stoops owns his azz

[badger]

There once was an actor Matt
Whose whorndom was only his hat
Oh McConaughey
My gawd you are ghey
Not that there's anything wrong with that.

[cjames317]

Ruf-Neks shoot shotguns.
The Cowboys shoot their cannon.
Who says it's not war?

[badger]

Red River Shootout
I shall call you nothing else.
'Cept OU-Texas

[mdklatt]

Greg Davis deserves praise
as Oklahoma's defense
coordinator.

[badger]

What good is Muschump
When the Texas defense is
only half the team?

[mdklatt]

Sooner momentum!
'Horns get ball back near halftime
Chris Sims takes a knee

[mdklatt]

After defeat, the road
to Austin is longer than
the road to Dallas.

[mdklatt]

Waves crash against shore
now as they have always done.
Sooner dominance.

[KRYPTON]

masturbating steer
seriously, are you mad?
go back to gay town

sexual strangeness
bad fashion sense on display
UT fans are dumb

[KRYPTON]

there is no place here
for your droll shenanigans
muschamp, go to hell!

[cjames317]

Ninety two thousand.
Hollerin, clappin, cussin.
God, I love it so.

[OU86]

http://i414.photobucket.com/albums/pp229/BRAGGonUT/oklahoma-girl.jpg

[SanDiegoSoonerGal]

Hey OU86

Read the thread title again. It's Red River Haiku, not Red River Honkers. :D

[aero]

my favorite time
laughing at haiku and horns
OU victory

[OUmillenium]

Less than 24
Macky's clap is such a bore
Colty goes down hard

[badger]

Goodbye avatar
Says Lid to badger Sunday
Also, see ya, sig

[cjames317]

Hey OU86

Read the thread title again. It's Red River Haiku, not Red River Honkers. :D

What's wrong with cleavage?
Sometimes mere words just won't do
To exclaim OU!

[Just A Visitor Here]

Congrats number 1
It was good while it lasted
Horns win, OU drops

[buck]

just a visitor
penetrate bevo again
enjoy bovine love

[Just A Visitor Here]

just a visitor
penetrate bevo again
enjoy bovine love

Must be obsession
How often Goons refer to
Beastiality

[Just A Visitor Here]

Shortly after noon
Sooner Fans board falls silent
Stoops face in his hands

[ouwasp]

Sad, mad, distraught, bad
Longhorn emotions summed up
This time tomorrow

[cjames317]

The real Roy Williams
played for the crimson and cream,
like the real McCoy.

[mdklatt]

Error 404
Web site is not responding
Hornfans is down

[mdklatt]

UT players get
participation medals
even in defeat.

[mdklatt]

We beat your asses.
Where did you get this "co-champs"
nonsense? Silly horns.

[mdklatt]

Bevo in stupor
on sidelines. Also: no balls.
Mack Brown's the same way.

[cjames317]

Crown Royal and Coke
and Oklahoma Sooners.
BRING ON THE LONGHORNS!!!!!!!!!!

[mdklatt]

Dear KOCO,
Cut away from the game and
face consequences.

[mdklatt]

It's not too early
to make your travel plans for
San Diego, horns.