Mack Brown...

[StoopTroup]

...is spooning with his Vince Young Voodoo Doll right now.

[mfosterftw]

has named his step son the "get back" coach...

[goingoneight]

... kissed a quarterback, and thinks he liked it.

[Curly Bill]

...owns stock in Vaselline.

[tommieharris91]

...thinks Norman is weird.

[Flagstaffsooner]

Calls Fred Akers for coaching advice and they end up having phone sex.

[DrZaius]

...performs his own cavity searches and then drinks from his colostomy bag.

[goingoneight]

... says he's voting for Clinton as a write-in nomination.

[tommieharris91]

... says he's voting for Clinton as a write-in nomination.

...because he is a closet feminazi.

[SoonerEmpire]

... still thinks that Ron Paul has a chance to pull off the upset against Mccain and Obama and win the election!

[StoopTroup]

...is getting high with Ricky right now.

[Curly Bill]

...thinks Colty-boy is dead sexy.

[olevetonahill]

Has the Clap so bad Oral Roberts cant pray it off.

[SoonerEmpire]

... thinks the $700 billion dollar bailout plan was created for him to bail out his players.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v451/veilofdisdain/Miscellaneous/bookemhorns.jpg

[badger]

... is a man whore for a different reason:
http://img374.imageshack.us/img374/3826/mackqo9.jpg (http://imageshack.us)
http://img374.imageshack.us/img374/mackqo9.jpg/1/w414.png (http://g.imageshack.us/img374/mackqo9.jpg/1/)

[OKC-SLC]

hopes he slips up at CU so he won't have to come in to Dallas as a top 5 team vs. stoops

[SoonerEmpire]

... is Vince Young's girl for all seasons!

[SoonerEmpire]

... hopes Colorado's band doesn't mock texass by playing Boomer Sooner again like they did a few years ago.

[badger]

... finds that he coaches the best out of his players when he stops coaching.

[SoonerEmpire]

:les: ... is already scripting his Gundy-esque post game press conference meltdown after the RRR. [hairGel]

[sooner2b09]

...upon hearing Vince Young almost committed suicide, Mack disappeared for 5 days and went on a male strip club vacation

[Flagstaffsooner]

:les: ... is already scripting his Gundy-esque post game press conference meltdown after the RRR. [hairGel]Mack dont do that, he eats the pills that they give bevo.

[badger]

... will let no other coaches answer any questions for their quarterback.

[StormySooner-IN]

...is looking ahead to Missouri.

[badger]

... is looking ahead to the Holiday Bowl

[DeadSolidPerfect]

BEAT TEXAS!!!!

I'm drunk.

[illinisooner]

...can't wait to answer this one for Colt.

[SoonerEmpire]

... made this girl cry.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v451/veilofdisdain/Miscellaneous/CryingTUfan.jpg

[badger]

... is looking ahead of recruiting season.

[OUthunder]

dips Gold River.

[badger]

... would skinny dip in rivers, but Texas rivers have no water.

[Tulsa_Fireman]

...was proud to hear Vince was a Titan, but could've swore he made him a loose'n.

[aurorasooner]

Best of Mack from Fark Central. Larger Image is on Fark Central.
http://i351.photobucket.com/albums/q474/aurorasooner/BestOfMackVerySmallJPG.jpg

[SoonerBacker]

...converted this guy to Whorndom!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v140/HardCorpsHistory/satanist-arafat.jpg

[DeadSolidPerfect]

... made this girl cry.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v451/veilofdisdain/Miscellaneous/CryingTUfan.jpg

I'd hit it.

[badger]

... knows his job is safe regardless of results, because he will never unanimously be "voted" out by all one million Texas alums who donate solely to the football program and nothing else.

[Flagstaffsooner]

Drinks Zima and stalks little college boys in Waco.

[OUthunder]

dresses like a fag.

[Laelaface]

....is able to kiss his own *** goodbye and likes it!

[StoopTroup]

...can take Bevo's butt plug.

[badger]

... wonders when UT will name the stadium after him, because he's a national championship winning coach and all.

... disowned his boy VY when UT decided to name the stadium after the one that really won the championship :D

[SWFloridaSooner]

... wears bowling shoes.

[A Sooner in Texas]

Is giving the clap to his entire team at this very moment.

[StoopTroup]

...wears *** chaps in the lockeroom at halftime to pump up his boys.

[badger]

...wants to clap for Matt Clapp.

[Tulsa_Fireman]

...wears *** chaps in the lockeroom at halftime to pump up his boys.

...which means a lot more than you think.

[StoopTroup]

I'd hit it.

OG_6CopW9GQ

[badger]

... is hiring Calvin Simpson for additional recruiting expertise.

[BigBoomerInBigD]

...leaves his toenail clippings in the ashtray on the coffee table.

[SanDiegoSoonerGal]

...fervently hopes no one ever discovers his collection of Cabbage Patch dolls.

[Curly Bill]

...fervently hopes no one ever discovers his collection of gerbils.

[goingoneight]

... thought the Tulsa State Fair was AWESOME!

[westcoast_sooner]

... says "Moo" when you ask him about his mother.

[rainiersooner]

Disagrees with Barney Frank's politics, but would like to spend a quiet evening with him.

[AlbqSooner]

Wishes Bevo had a smoother tongue.

[badger]

... cries at the end of every Disney movie.

[OU-HSV]

Is a handsy pansy

[cheezyq]

...clapped his hands in Austin, causing a hurricane in the Pacific.

[meoveryouxinfinity]

...packs & delivers like UPS trucks

[badger]

... in his heart-to-heart talks with players, asked "What can Brown do for you?"

... stopped when players told him that it was deemed "uncool" after the first time that ad played and OU turned it into a punchline for all the losses.

[MyT Oklahoma]

...fervently hopes no one ever discovers his collection of gerbils.

ARMAGEDDON!!!!!!! :eek:
_________________________________________
"This is the voice of The Sooner Football Network."

[SbOrOiNaEnR]

...hired Lid to sue Penn & Teller the first time he saw The Aristocrats, because the joke is essentially a play-by-play description of his post-game celebrations with his players.

[badger]

... does not understand the concept of making fun of someone by saying "your mother," when that is the person that everyone loves most.

[SoonerSoph]

... has nightmares of Jason White and Mark Clayton

[badger]

... wonders if Mike Stoops would be up for coaching Texas' defense if his Arizona team doesn't make a bowl.

... but only if he agrees to not hurt players feeling or use curse words in practice.

[BigBoomerInBigD]

...owns the complete works of Michael Bolton. On cassette.

[badger]

... still cries about not getting Adrian Peterson.

[badger]

... will make his team feel better by telling them that they are the ranking of whichever poll has them higher.

... well, S#!+, GUYS, looks like both polls have us in the same spot :mad:

:D

[SoonerSoph]

... Thinks Bush is a great president

[Breadburner]

thought Oral Roberts were really 5 gay guys named Bob........

[badger]

... doesn't understand why recruiting solely in one state, Texas, results in annual beatings by teams that recruit multiple states.

[OU-HSV]

...is scared because he knows that OU is 1-0 when I attend OUr games that college gameday is setup at.

[StoopTroup]

...will be operating the Tilt-a-Whirl at the texas state fair soon.

[Rogue]

Wears Bob Stoops pajamas.

[okiewaker]

After the games in the Cotton Bowl used to get great pleasure licking the mustard off VY's State Fair corndog.

[birddog]

fingers his anus and then rubs it on his teeth for "that mack brown shine".

[OU-HSV]

fingers his anus and then rubs it on his teeth for "that mack brown shine".

:eek:

[Flagstaffsooner]

Wants OU to run the Z-Bone again.

[badger]

... thinks he will beat OU on special teams, because Mack knows his boys are more special than OU's.

[SoonerSoph]

... Thinks Cedric Benson has a brighter future than AD

[BillyBall]

has politician hair...

[okiewaker]

has politician hair...

Yea, he parts it to the left:) :)

[setem]

****s in the lazy river at White Water Bay!

[SbOrOiNaEnR]

fingers his anus and then rubs it on his teeth for "that mack brown shine".

...stole this idea from Mark Sanchez.

[SoonerTroll]

... played just the tip with colt mccoy, just for a second, just to see how it feels

[OUMallen]

is loved by OUMallen because OU will always have an advantage over the whorns while he's clapping.

[okiewaker]

hates that OU has scored 171 points on them and they have only scored 60.

[okiewaker]

has been severely outcoached by Bob.

[badger]

... burns his Texas toast every morning in honor of Texas' burnt orange.

[Dio]

...liked the Cotton Bowl just the way it was, thank you.

[Dio]

...is strong enough for a man but made for a...man?

[Dio]

...voted for the bailout.

[badger]

...plucks his magic twanger

... but wishes that he had two maracas to play instead.

[BornandBred]

... is STILL OU's greatest Texas asset.

[StoopTroup]

....thinks he's going to "Disney on Ice" Saturday Morning.

[CincySooner]

... wishes Big Tex would wear a skirt once in a while.

[froneal]

...is going to pay Brian Britt to have the Pride play "The Eyes of Texas" during crucial goal-line stands.

[badger]

... stopped inviting high profile recruits to the OU-Texas game, because they kept commiting to OU instead!

[StoopTroup]

....misses the gold hat.

[badger]

...has plans to retire the gold hat.

...just as soon...as...he...can...have...it...back! NOW! Please? Come on...

[badger]

... because Lid is an ideal representative of Whorn Fandom - all talk and no putting his avatar/sig where his mouth is. (http://www.soonerfans.com/forums/showthread.php?t=121640)

[Big Red Ron]

can suck a golf ball through a garden hose, say's Vince Young, while taking his meds at the local padded walls.

[BornandBred]

... hearts NAMBLA

[deweydw]

made Colt McCoy a man...

[deweydw]

thinks the bird is the word.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OZiJdMkCy5A

[cjames317]

... gets pumped on Clay Aiken's new CD.

[badger]

... clubs baby kittens to death with endangered African albino rhinos.

[devOUt]

....the only Big XII coach who is glad Franchione is gone.

[badger]

... will still lose to Texas A&M.

[SoonerEmpire]

... wishes this thread would disappear.

[MR2-Sooner86]

...is lucky his mother didn't donate his fetus to stemcell research.

[badger]

...starts their own personal thread every day to express their disgust at their opponent... on hornfans.com.

[Sooner_09]

...listens to himself clap over and over again for personal enjoyment

[badger]

... has hired away DJ Necktie from Lloyd Noble to play "Everybody Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap yo' hands! (clap clap clap)" for him.

[StoopTroup]

....just pulled his head outta his *** and said..."It looks bad for the next week"...then he crammed it right back in.

[cjames317]

... is not bringing hell on Saturday. He's bringing...

MATTHEW MCCONNAUGHEY!

[badger]

... wears his wife's diamond earrings so that he can tell his players that he is down with the bling thing, yo.

[StoopTroup]

....should change the ut mascot to a jackass.

[badger]

... dreams of the day he can eat that longhorn right up for dinner like a big juicy texas steak, yum yum.

[deweydw]

... is not bringing hell on Saturday. He's bringing...

MATTHEW MYGODIMGAY!

fixed....

[badger]

... is crying himself to sleep at night because despite the whorns on here bashing Sooners left and right, none have come to his defense on this thread, yet.

... cries out "Why, whorns, why?" when they will defend the school, but not him. "Don't you love your Mack Daddy?"

[Landthief 1972]

...is tired of people walking up and asking him where the corn on the cob is, because then he has to explain that those are actually his teeth.

[Landthief 1972]

...is bummed that they fixed the overflowing toilets at the Cotton Bowl; now he'll have to get a drink somewhere else other than the bathroom floor.

[badger]

...reminds Texas that they are not the greatest team in the world, no, they are just a tribute. Mack couldn't remember his greatest playbook in the world, so no, this'll be a tribute, oh yeah - to the greatest team in the world, all right!

[StoopTroup]

....he's got nuthin.

[badger]

... once tried to freestyle rap with his athletes, but dislocated his hip in the process.

[FroggyStyle22]

..... thinks Kris Kross was singing about him.

[Dio]

...DVR's The View

[badger]

... does not see why a top five paid coach needs to also rank in the top five of the polls.

[badger]

... tells polesters that he will vote for Barack Obama because he is a progressive, forward-thinking individual and that it is time for a black president.

... then, within the privacy of a voting booth, vote for John McCain.

[badger]

... adds salt to salted peanuts

[BoomerSooner07]

thinks a donkey show aint got nuthin' on his Bevo show.

[olevetonahill]

...puts sugar on his grits

Thats Just nasty :eek:

[deweydw]

...knows 50 ways to love your leever.

[StoopTroup]

...loves his "Uncle Joe". :D

m-0YBr-6IxE

[deweydw]

...has a poster of Miss Jane over his bed.

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s85/deweydw/missjane.jpg

[badger]

... wants the game moved out of Dallas.

... to Austin.

... every. single. year.

[Sooner_09]

...secretly sneaks in and rides all fair rides the night before he get his *** handed to him

[badger]

... misses his morning snuggle with Vince. Colt is good, but nobody can replace VY

[badger]

... during a visit to a local Austin elementray school to promote OU-Texas week, flipped the board when the Second Grade winner of "Play Checkers with Coach Brown" was winning by too much.

... Second Grader FTW11!1 by responding "Too bad you couldn't do that in 2000 at the Cotton Bowl."

[fadada1]

... "deep throats" his corny dogs while strolling on the midway.

[badger]

...encourages the flipping off of OU fans by golden haired spoiled children in quarterback disguises.

[cjames317]

...dresses and acts just like Raji from "Be Cool" when he's hangin wit da homies.

[badger]

... will not share his iPod with anyone else, because it would kill recruiting if anyone knew he was a Michael Bolton guy.
http://www.luminomagazine.com/2004.03/spotlight/officespace/images/bolton/bolton1.jpg

[froneal]

...sucks. v:Dv

[deweydw]

... thinks asphalt is rectum trouble.

[frankensooner]

likes to be at the bottom of the pile at the furries convention

[BornandBred]

... plans to pre-lube before the game

[deweydw]

... wants to be Paris Hiltons BFF..

[deweydw]

... is a member of the Mylie Cyrus fan club.

[deweydw]

... likes peanutbutter and KentuckY jelly sammiches.

[Landthief 1972]

...will just want to go back home to dust his Precious Moments figurines after another embarrassing loss to OU.

http://www.preciousmoments.com/resources/productImages/104802_l.jpg

[Landthief 1972]

...wants his wife to bring him his chapstick—his lips hurt real bad!

[meoveryouxinfinity]

... is a member of the Mylie Cyrus fan club.

...it's him just bein' miley

..everybody makes mistakes!

[BigBoomerInBigD]

...does the work of three men: Curly, Larry and Moe.

[Geekboy]

sniffs the tissue after he wipes.

[badger]

... has ordered players to not admit that only 25 percent of the playbook was used only because Mack colored the other three pages.

(thanks Eclipse!)

[OU-HSV]

... likes peanutbutter and KentuckY jelly sammiches.

.....doesn't like deweydw's avatar because he has homosexual tendencies and a secret crush on Colt McCoy

[OU-HSV]

...wears a fanny pack

[badger]

... has convinced all of Aggieland that they cannot simply declare themselves better than Texas by beating them on the field, but rather, must also complete in recruiting, the rest of the Big 12 and have BCS bowl opportunities.

... has not been able to convince Whorn Whorn Land that they can be better than Oklahoma not by beating them on the field, but rather, but beating them in recruiting, the rest of the Big 12 and have BCS bowl opportunities.

... wishes he could coach in College Station where the fans are more gullible.

[badger]

... wants to go out like Mark Mangino - fat and happy.

EDIT: Oh! And on a go-cart :D

[BoomerSooner07]

can suck the chrome off a trailer hitch

[BrockLanders]

can only stop his compulsive masturbating by painting his shorthorn crimson & cream.....cause there's no way he can beat it then!

[cjames317]

... will officiate Matthew McConnaughey's gay wedding at halftime.

[Lott's Bandana]

...still has an open tab at Croce's.

[KYSooner]

...baits little kids to the pond with promises of candy and funny stories.

[StormySooner-IN]

...is less then 40 hours away from losing another to OU

[Sirus]

Had this guy strip at his b-day party

http://blogxilla.com/tmp/Vince%204%20bx.jpg

[CatfishSooner]

sucks...

[SoonerEmpire]

... thinks that "Barney" is a real dinosaur

[hgarmorer]

Is more than happy to clap at you but would rather give it you

[hgarmorer]

Had no clue the voice overs on MXC were fake.

[TheHumanAlphabet]

Thinks Colt McCoy can run like his gay lover Vince and calls plays for Colt to run so he can remember Vince better...

[hgarmorer]

Agreed to take Option A from Beck

[Dio]

...has his Carpenter's Greatest Hits tape loaded up in the Walkman so he can enjoy another nice long cry back to Austin Saturday night.

[Dio]

...drives 30 miles in the left lane, at 55 MPH, with his blinker on.

[Dio]

...doesn't think Tina Fey resembles Sarah Palin at all.

[Dio]

...posts on okcnbafans.com as "Coffeeman"

[Dio]

...screwed up my schedule this weekend so I couldn't buy Unnamed Sooner's extra ticket.

[Dio]

...pads his post count

[Dio]

...begged Mark Cuban to vote against the Sonics relocation to OKC.

[Dio]

...was the gunman on the grassy knoll

[Dio]

...invented flood control

[SoonerEmpire]

... still has an 8-track player in his car

[Dio]

...supports the NAFTA superhighway

[Dio]

...doesn't care much for Caddyshack, but can't watch Caddyshack II enough

[Dio]

...hogs threads when he's drunk

[SoonerEmpire]

... is too scared to say "Beetlejuice" three times

[SoonerEmpire]

... claims he intentionally loses every year to OU on purpose.

[SoonerEmpire]

... cheered for the communist Russian boxer in Rocky IV

[hgarmorer]

secretly watches Soldier and wishes he was Kurt Russell but instead of a killing machine and being dumped on an outpost planet, he wants to be a decent coach and land in Norman

[SoonerBacker]

...designed the "new" Whorn band uniforms.

[hgarmorer]

has been a lifelong wearer of Isotoners

[badger]

... sponsors annual "Back to Africa" boats in order to recapture Texas' infamous all-white championship glory.

...has denied entry to VY. He would miss him too much.

[olevetonahill]

eats the filling out of Oreos , puts toothpaste back in em .
Then passes em out on Halloween

[BigBoomerInBigD]

...eats the corn husk along with the tamale.

[Payton]

wears panties.

Im goingn to stab him in the foot with my screwdriver.

[deweydw]

... wears thong panties and walks with a limp because someone stabbed him in the foot with a screwdriver.

[Payton]

KAPOW

[stoops the eternal pimp]

likes to listen to the song "Sometimes when we touch" and think of Vince until he breaks down and cries

[deweydw]

... fell off the ball washer on the 9th hole.

[OU86]

is trying to steal our precious bodily fluids.

http://www.tigersweat.com/movies/strange/slove04s.jpg

[badger]

... just wants this week over with so he can finish out the season undefeated, not have to worry about the Big 12 championship and beg for a BCS berth

[BigBoomerInBigD]

...can't get the theme song from "Dora the Explorer" out of his mind.

[BornandBred]

... takes MyBoy's stool samples daily to ensure proper fiber consumption

[deweydw]

... is Badgers scratching post.

[badger]

... is Badgers scratching post.

http://p.webshots.com/ProThumbs/59/66959_wallpaper280.jpg
Nails are done, now working on doing my teeth :D

Oh, and another contribution to this thread is in order:

Mack Brown...

... bought all domain names calling for his head, or for any of his player's heads, because dang it, with so much football money funneling in through our millions of alumni, we gotta spend it somehow!

[Jason White's Third Knee]

...likes to fart loudly in the locker room and say, "THAT'S what Brown can do for you."

[cjames317]

... is rollin up I-35 to Ludacris' "Politics", bobbing his head and chanting "Obama is here."

[badger]

... agrees with Stoops that Big Tex needs to be forced into retirement:
http://assets.espn.go.com/photo/2008/1010/ncf_oklahoma_texas_412.jpg

[stoops the eternal pimp]

... agrees with Stoops that Big Tex needs to be forced into retirement:
http://assets.espn.go.com/photo/2008/1010/ncf_oklahoma_texas_412.jpg


Wow..Mack looks a lot like W in that pic

[badger]

For the record, that's the image on the front of the ESPN.com CFB page.

[BigBoomerInBigD]

...can't decide which Jonas Brother is the cutest.

[cjames317]

...just pulled in to the fairgrounds and figured out that they're not playing Prairie View A&M tomorrow.

[Big Red Ron]

Made Big XII South Championship rings after he lost to OU

[meoveryouxinfinity]

...can't decide which Jonas Brother is the cutest.

Joe.. definitely.

no... Nick.

or.. the other one (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbGKfdKDiLI)

[SoonerEmpire]

... cried when Janet Reno turned him down for a date

[hgarmorer]

wanted to be the guy in the Chocolate Axe commercial, but realized that dudes are not attracted to that.

[StormySooner-IN]

...made a deal with the joker.

[okiewaker]

positively without a doubt a peter puffer!

[SoonerEmpire]

... wishes he could have been at the jock itch party with the condoms earlier this year

[okiewaker]

Admits to scratching his taco to get a cheap thrill.

[SoonerEmpire]

... is in fetal position in the corner of the locker room right now with kickoff being an hour and a half away

[OUthunder]

likes to play with his junk.

[SoonerEmpire]

... likes to play with Vince's junk. :eek::eek::eek: