In this thread you shall confess...

[Veritas]

...the dirty little secrets that make you a horrible person:

For example:
I am a little prejudiced against obese people. And by a little I mean a lot.

I get very uncomfortable around retarded kids. I'm just not kosher with full-bodied hugs from anybody that's not my wife.

I try to stare out of the corner of my eye when I see somebody with a weird deformity. I want to be that guy that looks past that stuff and just sees the person inside. Nyeah, I'm not. I thinking "WTF" just like everybody else.

I want games to be injury-free, but when it's Notre-Dame vs USC, I want it quite a bit less.

I never say "yes" when the checker at the grocery store asks me if I want to donate a buck to some charity or another. I feel like I should just to make the cashier think I'm a good person.

[JohnnyMack]

I get very uncomfortable around retarded kids.

Then why the hell do you hang out here?

[Veritas]

Then why the hell do you hang out here?
Because I also secretly really like your hugs.

[Harry Beanbag]

JM does give some good hugs. Dean taught him how to do it right.

[StoopTroup]

My Grandpa taught me the "N" word.

Before he died...he realized he never should have been that way.

RIP M.

[royalfan5]

I like America's Next Top Model. I can't help it, it's just so engrossing.

[RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!]

My Grandpa taught me the "N" word.

Before he died...he realized he never should have been that way.

RIP M.Yes, we call them and their ilk "Bugeaters" on this internet board.

[Jerk]

I really worry about how I would react if someone hurt my dog. srsly. I'm a much more calm, mellow, friendly, and easy-going person than I make myself out to be here, but damn, I have too much love for that goober.

[soonercody]

I'm a troll.

[Getem]

I have never given anybody a kidney

[soonerscuba]

Chances are I don't find your kids as cute or as endearing as you, matter of fact, I probably find them incredibly annoying and wish you would stop sharing your burden with the rest of the world.

[Earickson]

I don't think anything mentioned so far makes someone a "horrible person." That's a pretty harsh indictment to me though.

When I went to OU, my roommates were Sigma Chi's and one of them was a high school friend of mine. He got really big headed at OU over his Greek affiliations, and so we naturally ended up on bad terms.

Flash forward to years later, and I hear he had to have a tumor removed from his spinal column, it was wrapped around his spinal cord like a snake I guess.

I guess he was at a wedding with some other friends of mine, and he was falling down all over the place and stumbling. He couldn't get into the back of a friends car, stuff like that.

Everybody thought he was just really drunk, but it was actually due to the spinal cancer.

When I heard that I thought it was quite an entertaining story. I'm rootin' for the cancer.

There, I win.

[Rogue]

I think the "pregnant/expecting/new mother" parking spaces are ridiculous. I don't need to park close because I'm young and in good health so I shouldn't mind who does. But I don't consider pregnancy or parenthood to be a handicap. It's a self-inflicted result of your behavior. NO PARKING SPACE FOR YOU. While I'm busy covering for your a$$ at work for the next 9 years while Junior gets every virus in town or you just don't feel like coming in today so you can go to the store and park near the handicapped folks I won't like you very much. And I won't mind a bit if I decide I want a mental health day or my dog needs to go to the vet. I won't park in your pregnant/nursing Mom spot, but I want to sometimes just out of spite.

[Flagstaffsooner]

I watch The Golden Girls reruns on bitch tv.

[Rogue]

Chances are I don't find your kids as cute or as endearing as you, matter of fact, I probably find them incredibly annoying and wish you would stop sharing your burden with the rest of the world.

Ugh. And the size of your carbon footprint of shame grows exponentially for every kid you have. If you have more than 2...you hate the planet. Not your kids' fault though, so I'll be nice to 'em.

And for the love of all that is holy, please stop giving your kids last names for first names. For every Tucker, Conner, Carson, Madison, Bailey, and Cooper I want to throat-punch another parent. They are people, not pets.

I'm going to hell, aren't I?

[Hot Rod]

If you walk out of the restroom without washing your hands, I will let others know it.

[r5TPsooner]

I watch Saved By The Bell when there's nothing else on.

I feel that guys who drive Hummers or BMW's are faggots who need the attention to make up for there "shortcomings."

Real men drink whiskey not beer.

[RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!]

And for the love of all that is holy, please stop giving your kids last names for first names. For every Tucker, Conner, Carson, Madison, Bailey, and Cooper I want to throat-punch another parent. They are people, not pets.

I'm going to hell, aren't I?While this may not bug me as much as it does you, I do find it silly-assed, and wish they would make it stop. Go all the way, people, and tag them with "MoonUnit" or "Dweezil", if you want to call your kids something really smart. I will add tatoos to this grievance.

[Veritas]

I think the "pregnant/expecting/new mother" parking spaces are ridiculous...I won't park in your pregnant/nursing Mom spot, but I want to sometimes just out of spite.
Oh, I will. I seek them out. I literally get excited when I have an opportunity to park in one of those spots because the whole thing is so ridiculous.


Real men drink whiskey not beer.
Fing A, He Who Accompanies Lightning.

But I really want an M3. Of course, I have a man crush on Tim Tebow, so...

[CK Sooner]

This thread makes me want to cry. :(

[Turd_Ferguson]

I have drank Natty at any hour of the day....just pick one.

I tell my wife she's not fat, but her *** is entirely too large.

I've secretly thought about telling on my best friend for cheating on his wife with another friends wife....but i couldn't.

I have torn all the mattress tags off my children's beds.

I am actually Flagstaffsooner's troll.

[Flagstaffsooner]

I don't think anything mentioned so far makes someone a "horrible person." That's a pretty harsh indictment to me though.

When I went to OU, my roommates were Sigma Chi's and one of them was a high school friend of mine. He got really big headed at OU over his Greek affiliations, and so we naturally ended up on bad terms.

Flash forward to years later, and I hear he had to have a tumor removed from his spinal column, it was wrapped around his spinal cord like a snake I guess.

I guess he was at a wedding with some other friends of mine, and he was falling down all over the place and stumbling. He couldn't get into the back of a friends car, stuff like that.

Everybody thought he was just really drunk, but it was actually due to the spinal cancer.

When I heard that I thought it was quite an entertaining story. I'm rootin' for the cancer.

There, I win.I neg obnoxious noobs.

[olevetonahill]

I must confess I really Like nOObs and Libs :rolleyes:

[Ike]

I'm just generally Horrible. If I went into specifics, I'd probably break the internet.

[Harry Beanbag]

I must confess I really Like bOObs and Labs :)

Me too. http://www.soonerfans.com/forums/images/icons/icon14.gif

[tbl]

When I go to the bathroom, I hardly ever wash my hands. The only exception is if poop and/or pee actually makes contact with my hands. If somebody else walks in behind me, I'll sometimes run the water without putting my hands in it, then either activate the blower or grab a paper towel just so they think I washed my hands. That typically depends on where I am (if its a business setting or Church setting I'll go through the fake motions), but I'll usually just walk out, GRAB THE DOOR HANDLE, and continue on as usual. Shaking hands, eating food, whatever.

I rule.

[CK Sooner]

I don't think anything mentioned so far makes someone a "horrible person." That's a pretty harsh indictment to me though.

When I went to OU, my roommates were Sigma Chi's and one of them was a high school friend of mine. He got really big headed at OU over his Greek affiliations, and so we naturally ended up on bad terms.

Flash forward to years later, and I hear he had to have a tumor removed from his spinal column, it was wrapped around his spinal cord like a snake I guess.

I guess he was at a wedding with some other friends of mine, and he was falling down all over the place and stumbling. He couldn't get into the back of a friends car, stuff like that.

Everybody thought he was just really drunk, but it was actually due to the spinal cancer.

When I heard that I thought it was quite an entertaining story. I'm rootin' for the cancer.

There, I win.

Really Nice.

[King Crimson]

when i was on the Norman High golf team i played a tournament round with this kid from one of the Tulsa schools (Hale or Memorial, maybe Broken Arrow...i forget) who was dying of cancer. i didn't know this at the time, but his head was shaved from chemo....it made sense later.

he was terrible. truly terrible. me and my friend from Edmond's team made fun of him ruthlessly (for some unknown reason) for 18 holes. i figure his coach let him play "just because"....i still feel terrible about it. and it was 20 years ago.

edit: to be honest, i think it's worst thing i've ever done.

[RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!]

when i was on the Norman High golf team i played a tournament round with this kid from one of the Tulsa schools (Hale or Memorial, maybe Broken Arrow...i forget) who was dying of cancer. i didn't know this at the time, but his head was shaved from chemo....it made sense later.

he was terrible. truly terrible. me and my friend from Edmond's team made fun of him ruthlessly (for some unknown reason) for 18 holes. i figure his coach let him play "just because"....i still feel terrible about it. and it was 20 years ago.

edit: to be honest, i think it's worst thing i've ever done.Is he still alive? You could apologize, since you feel so badly.

[King Crimson]

no idea. i don't remember his name.

i also think the Coen Bros are vastly overrated. and Swingers is pretty overrated, too.

people who think they are so special they need to order special things not on the menu at restaurants are ******s. pesto with shrimp is disgusting. fettuccine alfredo is a cliche.

people who have taken up golf in the last decade are almost always faux macho "jock" morons who lack appreciation for what makes the game great.

[VeeJay]

Two things that come to mind I am sure I will have to answer for at some point:

- Years ago I had a girlfriend that I dumped when I realized I was getting close to relocating to another job out of state. No way was I going to take her with me, which she assumed would happen. Break up sex? Yes, I milked it and felt bad when she figured out what I was up to.

- I swindled a company out of $20,000 because they wouldn't agree to something we were attempting. So the Big Swindle went off under the threat we would stop doing business with them. I have never behaved that way in a business setting since, and the poor bastud on the receiving end of my action passed away a long time ago. The fact I can recall this event of 14 years ago with clarity indicates I feel some guilt, no? HEY IT AIN'T LIKE FUGGERS HAVER NEVER RIPPED ME OFF BEFORE!

And that whole washing your hands in the bathroom thing? I have actually thought that, as I'm standing there peeing, if the slob on the crapper in the stall next to me sees my shoes, and later in the day connects me with the shoes he saw as somebody who don't wash their hands, then yeah, I'll go over to the sink and run the water for a few seconds, turn on the hand blower or make excessive noise getting a paper towel, and then I am covered.

[Scott D]

the fact that any of you are actually confessing anything in this thread makes you big ****ing pansies. That is all.

[Mixer!]

Question: if you post something negative about yourself and get neg-bombed in the process, are you at fault for really posting stupid sh*t about yourself, or are the neggers at fault for failing to comprehend what this thread is about?



:pop:

[Scott D]

Mixer, everyone is allowed to be judgemental and indignant..."IT'S THE INTERNETS!" :D

[StoopTroup]

I like pansies.

[GottaHavePride]

I like panties.


:eek:

[Sooner5030]

I have an issue with nice !bOObies!, they wont stop staring at me.

Seriously, I don't know what it is (breast fed as an infant, etc) there's something extremely attractive about a nice set of cans. They break my concentration all the time.

[r5TPsooner]

I have an issue with nice !bOObies!, they wont stop staring at me.

Seriously, I don't know what it is (breast fed as an infant, etc) there's something extremely attractive about a nice set of cans. They break my concentration all the time.

Me too. Same thing with a woman's bootie.:D

[Penguin]

I'll be negged for this one.


I sure was. It's pretty funny that somebody would actually neg somebody for being truthful in this thread.

[Jimminy Crimson]

I don't believe in recycling... :O

[Chuck Bao]

I must admit that I do not take anything posted on an interweb message board very seriously.

Oh yeah, I also have a man crush on Olevet, but it is more about his juice.

[Flagstaffsooner]

I must admit that I do not take anything posted on an interweb message board very seriously.

Oh yeah, I also have a man crush on Olevet, but it is more about his juice.
:eek:

[SouthFortySooner]

i think people who check their gas mileage are goofy. its like, what are you gonna do, pull over to the side of the road and wait till it gets better??? :confused: p.s. for this kind of smarmy stuff i frequently go to a site called: PostSecret :O

[BudSooner]

I took a **** in the cities water supply lake.

Cheered for A&M when they played K-State in 1998 Big XII champ game, I feel so dirty for this.

Cannot get into the Tiger hype, and almost chuckled when I heard he was going to be out the rest of the year due to his injury.

I only have 8 inches.

[StoopTroup]

I only have 8 inches.

Damn Bud...I would have needed therapy for that. :D

[KingBarry]

I think the "pregnant/expecting/new mother" parking spaces are ridiculous. I don't need to park close because I'm young and in good health so I shouldn't mind who does. But I don't consider pregnancy or parenthood to be a handicap. It's a self-inflicted result of your behavior. NO PARKING SPACE FOR YOU. While I'm busy covering for your a$$ at work for the next 9 years while Junior gets every virus in town or you just don't feel like coming in today so you can go to the store and park near the handicapped folks I won't like you very much. And I won't mind a bit if I decide I want a mental health day or my dog needs to go to the vet. I won't park in your pregnant/nursing Mom spot, but I want to sometimes just out of spite.

I feel this way EXACTLY, but..... now my wife is pregnant with our first, so it´ll be interesting to see if these feelings change.

[KingBarry]

And one more thing...

I never hope for games to be injury free (in fact i often wish for key opposing players to leave the game with injuries) but I do wish for relatively minor injuries that would keep them out for only our game, or until they have lost another game if they must lose two for us to make it into the Big XII Championship.

Sometimes I wish for an injury to be career ending, but only if it is a player I really do not like and I think he can earn a fine income as an insurance salesman or a firefighter or whatever, I just do not think he needs to cash in on the NFL lottery.

Is that so bad?

[MrJimBeam]

I'm really annoyed by roadside memorials to car crash victims. I'm sorry they're dead but why must I be reminded of their death on my way to work every day. It's almost as if I'm supposed to acknowledge and share in the grief of those who've lost someone along this roadside. I don't know you, I don't want to know you, and I don't want to know about your loss.

[Rogue]

I'm really annoyed by roadside memorials to car crash victims. I'm sorry they're dead but why must I be reminded of their death on my way to work every day. It's almost as if I'm supposed to acknowledge and share in the grief of those who've lost someone along this roadside. I don't know you, I don't want to know you, and I don't want to know about your loss.

Those don't bother me as much as the memorial on the back (or side) window of a vehicle. Really, your 1983 Corolla is dedicated to the memory of Bill? I'm sure he'd be proud.

[OU4LIFE]

Because I also secretly really like your hugs.

you know he's fat, right?

[Mixer!]

On the surface, they seem to be part of the healing process; but upon further review, they're more like a scabbed-over wound that's repeatedly picked open. Are there roadside memorials to James Dean, Karen Silkwood, and Jayne Mansfield out there?



:pop:

[MrJimBeam]

How ironic would it be if someone died in a car accident because they were rubber-necking the roadside memorial?

[yermom]

i think people who check their gas mileage are goofy. its like, what are you gonna do, pull over to the side of the road and wait till it gets better??? :confused: p.s. for this kind of smarmy stuff i frequently go to a site called: PostSecret :O

for one, it's a way to tell if there is something up with your car, or how your car doesn't like ethanol gas...

or estimating how much a ~2000 mile round trip to Arizona might cost...

[yermom]

In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out... But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.

[Hamhock]

In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out... But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.


are you sure it wasn't at a pie eating contest?

[Tulsa_Fireman]

I feel this way EXACTLY, but..... now my wife is pregnant with our first, so it´ll be interesting to see if these feelings change.

Hopefully they will.

The bigger your lady gets, the harder it is to get around. And some get to the point where having 20-50 pounds bolted on your gut is downright debilitating. What happened to good ol' fashoined chivalry, anyway? I know my mama would throw a shoe so far up my *** I could tie the laces by pickin' my nose if she found out her boy didn't step back and do the gentlemanly thing for a lady, let alone a pregnant one.

But to at least contribute, I was a full blown :chicken: when I was a boy. Said a lot of things to a lot of people in school, picking on 'em and stuff. One kid, we called him 'Stroker Ace' because he got caught polishing his loverocket. I railed that kid unmercifully, to the point where he actually manned up one day, threw down his bookbag, and gunned up for go time. He must've watched an afterschool special or something where the little guy beats up the big, mean bully. I looked at the kid, laughed, and went on to class. I feel bad that I pushed that kid so far he was willing to throw down for it to stop. I'd like to say that became an introspective moment where I realized picking on others is simply one's way to try and bolster their own ineptitude. I'd like to say I realized the err of my ways and apologized, befriended the kid, and ended up finding a commonality never before seen like some crap from a John Hughes movie.

Instead, myself and everyone else still called the kid 'Stroker Ace'. We couldn't fit enough wanking jokes in the school day. And I gotta admit, making fun of a kid because he was spankin' it at school still strikes me as pretty damn funny.

[Tulsa_Fireman]

In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out... But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.

SLOTH LOVE THIS POST

[olevetonahill]

In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out... But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.

Id have been ROFLMFAO
but thats just me .:D

[BudSooner]

Same here, thats funny for sure.

[JohnnyMack]

you know he's fat, right?

Brick. ****. House.

[Penguin]

I'm really annoyed by roadside memorials to car crash victims. I'm sorry they're dead but why must I be reminded of their death on my way to work every day. It's almost as if I'm supposed to acknowledge and share in the grief of those who've lost someone along this roadside. I don't know you, I don't want to know you, and I don't want to know about your loss.

Oh, yeah! I agree! I have already told my family that if I died on the road, do NOT make a memorial for me! I would rather be remembered for what I've done with my life, and not be remembered as some dumbass that fell asleep at the wheel.

[jage]

I think Sororities and Fraternities are gay, and anybody who pays money to make friends and fit in with a cliche are dumb. :O

There is a person in my apartment complex who has a handicapped spot, but can walk perfectly fine...I secretly wish they'd fall and break their leg so that they would actually deserve the handicap spot...

I don't feel bad at all when people who ride motorcycles without helmets on the freeway die...

And like someone else said, my wife has put on a few pounds but I don't say anything...luckily though, she decided on her own to sign up for the gym, so now we're both getting back into shape. :D

[RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!]

And one more thing...

I never hope for games to be injury free (in fact i often wish for key opposing players to leave the game with injuries) but I do wish for relatively minor injuries that would keep them out for only our game, or until they have lost another game if they must lose two for us to make it into the Big XII Championship.

Sometimes I wish for an injury to be career ending, but only if it is a player I really do not like and I think he can earn a fine income as an insurance salesman or a firefighter or whatever, I just do not think he needs to cash in on the NFL lottery.

Is that so bad?Reggie Bush. Matt Lionfart.

[r5TPsooner]

Oh, yeah! I agree! I have already told my family that if I died on the road, do NOT make a memorial for me! I would rather be remembered for what I've done with my life, and not be remembered as some dumbass that fell asleep at the wheel.



What if it's and infant or small child that didn't have a long enough life to build a life resume?

[Penguin]

There is a person in my apartment complex who has a handicapped spot, but can walk perfectly fine...I secretly wish they'd fall and break their leg so that they would actually deserve the handicap spot...


Try not to jump to conclusions. My ex had a handicapped tag and she can walk just fine. However, she was born with a defect in her ankles and after 5 surgeries, it still isn't corrected. She can walk fine for about a quarter of a mile or so, then her ankles just give out. I've seen it happen many times. She'll be walking along, and without warning, she falls flat on her face and she can't walk again for a few hours.


Many times, I have been approached by somebody challenging why we should get that spot. I got so tired of explaining it. Finally, I would just roll my eyes and ignore the idiot.

I really wish I had the balls to say to them, "Gee, dip ****, you really are championing the cause of the hadicaps! You sure are going to get another jewel in your crown in Heaven!"


Now, we did live by one promise to ourselves. We would never take the last available handicapped spot.

[stoops the eternal pimp]

Oh, yeah! I agree! I have already told my family that if I died on the road, do NOT make a memorial for me! I would rather be remembered for what I've done with my life, and not be remembered as some dumbass that fell asleep at the wheel.

And for the love of God, if I die, don't put a sticker on your car saying in memory of me..I told my wife if she did that, I would haunt her til she took it off..I think there is a better way to remember me than a sticker on your back window

[badger]

...the dirty little secrets that make you a horrible person:

There are many things I won't do in public that I confine to the privacy of my own little safe environments, like being home.

1- Complaining about others. I usually have a smile on my face 90 percent of the time, but on the inside, I'm thinking about how awful it is what people are saying about others, how terrible people are acting in public and how much I dislike traffic lights in downtown Tulsa.

2- Cursing. Parents would not tolerate the words popularly known as "four letter words," thus that has carried through all these years later. I would curse all the time when the parents (and tattlers, like the school and the brother) were not around and as such, continue this trend today.

3- Nail biting. It's an awful habit and I know it, but sometimes I'm just too nervous to not do it. I use hand sanitizer quite often, so it's not a health issue or anything, but I have a nasty habit, people. It's just as addictive as alcohol and tobacco, except I've been doing it for more than 20 years, probably closer to 25 (and I am exactly 25 now).

So, there's the nasty confessions of badger, the two-faced blond chick that might look happy, polite and... um... fingernailified in public, but leads a separate angry, cursing, biting personality on the inside. :D

[badger]

Ok, now that I read the rest of the thread, I see that my last post did not really fit in with everything else. So, here's my bad little badger story...

We had this awful professor. Nobody liked the class (it was an artsy fartsy class for an elective and we met in a tiny classroom adjacent to her office) and the professor often showed up late. The five-minutes-and-you-leave rule was definitely in effect.

Anyways, she did several things that I thought were questionable over the semester. First, I was one of three people in the class to purchase the textbook, so she asked me to share my book with my classmates to photocopy. I later e-mailed her privately to tell her how that made me feel as a professional writer and the pressure it put on me in front of peers asking to do such a thing. So, she brought it up later in front of the class. Awkward.

After that, it was all downhill. She became extremely critical of everything I said and did in class. It was an awful semester and I was certain that she was going to give her final judgment of my morals of breaking copyright infringement laws via the report card. Thus, I was determined to make an equally awful final judgment... in the form of teacher evaluations. She was by no means tenured and an awful evaluation would mean even more for her - especially when only three out of the entire class bothered to show for evaluation day (yes, we hated her that much that people just stopped showing up).

Ruthless evaluation over, a few weeks later to my shock, I was issued an "A" grade at the end of the semester. Did she actually respect that I stood up to her in week one and all the future criticisms were just tests to see if I would continue standing up? Was it just the fact that I had perfect attendance and nobody else seemed to care about the class anymore?

I would like to think that my bad evaluation did not haunt her, but I still wonder if it did. As bad of a teacher as she was, I still question if I did the right thing by my vengeful evaluation.

[bonkuba]

I don't believe in recycling... :O


or Blue recycling Bags :D :D :D

[mdklatt]

i think people who check their gas mileage are goofy. its like, what are you gonna do, pull over to the side of the road and wait till it gets better???

1) A sudden drop in mileage is an indicator that something is wrong with your car.

2) I now know that if I slow down just 5 MPH when I drive to Dallas it will save me about 3-5 MPG.

3) I know not to get gas at the station at the corner of Boyd and Classen anymore because they're crooks. :mad:

4) Don't you just want to know?

[mdklatt]

I'm really annoyed by roadside memorials to car crash victims.


Those don't bother me as much as the memorial on the back (or side) window of a vehicle.

Don't forget the T-shirts with the picture of (I'm assuming) the deceased.

[The Maestro]

This thread is worthless without pics...

[mdklatt]

I But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life.


This thread is worthless without pics...

:eek:

[Tulsa_Fireman]

I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.

[LilSooner]

I dated this kid in high school for a long time, broke up with him because he was an *******. He tried to get me back by putting a rose and a note in my locker. In the note it said, "my life with out you is like a pencil with out lead, it's pointless."

Being the bitch that I am I proceeded to show it to all of his friends. He still hates me. I still do not care and still laugh about it to this day. I'm evil.


Also I will judge you as a bad parent if your bring your infant to an inappropriate event like a loud *** football game or the fair after 10 pm.

[badger]

Also I will judge you as a bad parent if your bring your infant to an inappropriate event like a loud *** football game

I had two parent/kid combos near us Saturday that worried me - a very young girl, like kindergarten age, that was in tears by the second quarter after the cloud cover went away. She was obviously not a happy camper. Then, there was the kid behind me that would cheer loud - but then never shut up and add commentary on everything. :mad:

[soonerbrat]

i was really mean to my little stepsister when I was 10.

[stoops the eternal pimp]

When my brother and I were kids, I would set his alarm for 330 AM in his bedroom after he went to sleep...

One night I chewed a package of big red gum and rolled it in his hair after he went to sleep...he had to have his head shaved pretty much....good times

[SoonerInKCMO]

I gave some counterfeit twenties to some strippers Saturday night. :(

[Beef]

I've thought about each and every one of y'all while masterbating.

[tbl]

This has the potential to seriously be the thread of the decade. Keep em coming!

This wasn't done with ill will, but it still sucks. I was back in my hometown for some holiday or something and ran into my "girlfriend" from 6th grade. After reminiscing on how she broke up with me at the skating rink and having a good laugh that she would marry the guy she broke up with me for, I asked her when she was due since I had heard she was pregnant and she looked every bit full term. She then let me know that she had the baby 4 months earlier... Ouch... I couldn't quite recover and that was the last time I've ever seen her... all 200 pounds of her.

[Jimminy Crimson]

I will never, ever, ever buy or use a CFL bulb in my house.

[r5TPsooner]

I cracked a big ole smile when I read that Tom Brady was done for the season. Not only that, it gave me a warm fuzzy for at least a full three seconds.

[soonervegas]

I like Enchanted (the movie) a little too much for a 34 yr old hetero male. I stop everytime it is on. I like the songs, Amy Adams, Pip.......it's magical.

[SoonerInKCMO]

I have an urge to break into Jimminy's house and change all his light bulbs and take all his recyclables to the recycling center. Maybe even put a programmable thermostat in.

[Viking Kitten]

-I drank a lot of Diet Coke when I was pregnant with my son.

-Sometimes I leave trash on the floor at movie theatres.

-In the winter I turn the heater up after Czar goes to sleep.

-I can't incriminate myself by telling you about the worst thing I did in high school because I'm not sure if the statute of limitations has run out.

[KC//CRIMSON]

I have stolen everyones spek!

[VeeJay]

When I park at a mall or at the Wal Marts or some other godforsaken asphalt jungle parking lot, I will intentionally walk down the wrong aisle from where my car is parked. Especially if it's crowded.

Sometimes, a person is driving just behind me at the same pace I am walking, waiting for me to get in my car and leave. They want my space. Dangling my car keys for effect, I suddenly walk between cars and go to the other aisle.

The look on the person's face is priceless - that is, when I can see them. They usually speed off.

[CK Sooner]

I cracked a big ole smile when I read that Tom Brady was done for the season. Not only that, it gave me a warm fuzzy for at least a full three seconds.

Ditto :D

[CK Sooner]

I have stolen everyones spek!


*****

[mdklatt]

I'm a Packer fan, but I harbor no hatred of the Vikings or their fans. I've always been that way, so it has nothing to do with Purple Jesus. I'm half-Minnesotan by birth, so maybe that's why.

[lexsooner]

When I was a little kid, we were eating in a small town diner and I spilled some ice on the floor next to the table. Some handicapped guy comes walking by and slips on the wet spot, falls, and stays on the ground, stunned more than injured I think. My folks did not realize I had spilled the ice, and some staff were helping the guy, so we left the restaurant.

I took pleasure in finding out people I did not like in high school are struggling through adulthood. A friend of mine was bullied by OU qb Brewster Hobby's son in high school. My friend looked him up on court docket websites, some 25 years or so after high school, and laughed when he saw the ex-bully had a bunch of arrests for DUI and is doing prison time in Texas and looks like a broken-down old man in his mug shot. My friend and I both laughed about the guy's demise.

[Jimminy Crimson]

I have an urge to break into Jimminy's house and change all his light bulbs and take all his recyclables to the recycling center. Maybe even put a programmable thermostat in.

I'll jump right on the LED lights when they're closer to $10 a light. The ~$40 now is a little much. I just can't stand the florescent feel, even the ones that are supposed to look like normal bulbs. Bleh!

I do have a programable thermostat, though! :cool:

[yermom]

are you sure it wasn't at a pie eating contest?

wrong Corey Feldman movie

(this would/should have been a spek ;))


and i can't think of anything i would really admit to on here :D

[JPNSKER]

I'm a closet Sooner Fan.:)

[Curly Bill]

I'm really annoyed by roadside memorials to car crash victims. I'm sorry they're dead but why must I be reminded of their death on my way to work every day. It's almost as if I'm supposed to acknowledge and share in the grief of those who've lost someone along this roadside. I don't know you, I don't want to know you, and I don't want to know about your loss.

Same here.

[Echoes]

I have somewhat of an ego. Not huge or anything, but I believe I am a good deal smarter and on top of things then 99% of everyone around me, and that has so far played out to be true (decision making, grades, internships, college degrees, etc etc). I am usually depended on to help my friends in any of a very wide variety of topics, and it gets very frustrating.

For instance, my girlfriend is a business major. I have never taken more then 1 business class in my life. However, I am expected to tutor her in micro and macro economics, both of which I know nothing about. There are a million other examples like this. I am frequently needed to set up computers/fix computer problems, do a huge variety of college homework, diagnose medical conditions, etc. I have many hard college classes I am taking as well, but my homework is always saved for after midnight, because usually a few people a night need help with insert_completely_random_task_01.

Although I do not mind helping at all, it gets to the point where I am being taken advantage of, and I resent my friends and girlfriend often because of it.

I do not like people who do not take care of their bodies. I don't want to hear any excuse about thyroid problems, save it. You only get one, people. I'm not telling you to work out 3 hours a day, but don't tell me your to busy to not work out for 30 minutes, 3 times a week. Take care of yourself.

[Echoes]

I cracked a big ole smile when I read that Tom Brady was done for the season. Not only that, it gave me a warm fuzzy for at least a full three seconds.

x 100 for me. Cheaters never win.

[Breadburner]

When friends make me angry I make a note the next time I have access to their bathroom I arsehole their toothbrush.....

[sooneron]

JM does give some good hugs. Dean taught him how to do it right.

Yeah, but that "from behind" business has got to stop.:mad:

[Viking Kitten]

I have somewhat of an ego. Not huge or anything, but I believe I am a good deal smarter and on top of things then 99% of everyone around me, and that has so far played out to be true (decision making, grades, internships, college degrees, etc etc). I am usually depended on to help my friends in any of a very wide variety of topics, and it gets very frustrating.

For instance, my girlfriend is a business major. I have never taken more then 1 business class in my life. However, I am expected to tutor her in micro and macro economics, both of which I know nothing about. There are a million other examples like this. I am frequently needed to set up computers/fix computer problems, do a huge variety of college homework, diagnose medical conditions, etc. I have many hard college classes I am taking as well, but my homework is always saved for after midnight, because usually a few people a night need help with insert_completely_random_task_01.

Although I do not mind helping at all, it gets to the point where I am being taken advantage of, and I resent my friends and girlfriend often because of it.

I do not like people who do not take care of their bodies. I don't want to hear any excuse about thyroid problems, save it. You only get one, people. I'm not telling you to work out 3 hours a day, but don't tell me your to busy to not work out for 30 minutes, 3 times a week. Take care of yourself.

Promise me you won't tutor anyone needing help with English classes.

[tbl]

When I park at a mall or at the Wal Marts or some other godforsaken asphalt jungle parking lot, I will intentionally walk down the wrong aisle from where my car is parked. Especially if it's crowded.

Sometimes, a person is driving just behind me at the same pace I am walking, waiting for me to get in my car and leave. They want my space. Dangling my car keys for effect, I suddenly walk between cars and go to the other aisle.

The look on the person's face is priceless - that is, when I can see them. They usually speed off.

This is a great idea. Great idea. I would spek you if KC hadn't screwed us.

[Animal Mother]

Ugh. And the size of your carbon footprint of shame grows exponentially for every kid you have. If you have more than 2...you hate the planet. Not your kids' fault though, so I'll be nice to 'em.

And for the love of all that is holy, please stop giving your kids last names for first names. For every Tucker, Conner, Carson, Madison, Bailey, and Cooper I want to throat-punch another parent. They are people, not pets.

I'm going to hell, aren't I?

You're already in Tennessee, aren't you????

Princess Daina's car wreck wasn't caused by the papparazzi. I cut the brake lines on her Benz with a rusty Swiss Army knife. She was a blue blood and she had blue b*lled me.

I cheated on my girlfriend because I thought she had cheated on me. When I found out she hadn't cheated on me, I cheated on her again for making me think she cheated on me.

[IB4OU2]

I really admire female public television news reporters....can't help it.

[Tulsa_Fireman]

I watch the Weather Channel for the boobies.

I once watched a Lifetime made-for-TV movie.

For the boobies.

[OUMallen]

I don't want to vote anymore. I feel so disenfranshised I really think it doesn't make a difference.

[Taxman71]

I always inspect people who park in handicap spots to ascertain whether they are truly handicapped are just borrowing their old aunt's placard.

[OUMallen]

Same here.


As to roadside memorials- you freaking dumbasses, don't INCREASE the chance of MORE WRECKS by placing DISTRACTIONS on the side of the road, the purpose of which is entirely to DRAW ATTENTION AWAY FROM DRIVING!


Another one- I hate stupid people.:mad: :mad: :mad:

[soonerbrat]

I always inspect people who park in handicap spots to ascertain whether they are truly handicapped are just borrowing their old aunt's placard.

what if they are handicapped in a way that you can't see. for instance, what if they have a heart condition that limits how much they should walk?

[soonerbrat]

As to roadside memorials- you freaking dumbasses, don't INCREASE the chance of MORE WRECKS by placing DISTRACTIONS on the side of the road, the purpose of which is entirely to DRAW ATTENTION AWAY FROM DRIVING!


Another one- I hate stupid people.:mad: :mad: :mad:

why do you hate yourself?

[Taxman71]

what if they are handicapped in a way that you can't see. for instance, what if they have a heart condition that limits how much they should walk?

If I don't see any obvious physicial limitations, I usally assume it is a heart issue, etc. since I have family members in that situation...especially if they are old. Besides, it's not like I have ever challenged or questioned anyone on it.....it is just an observational habit.

Even worse, I think a woman driving an expensive car is more attractive than one driving a hooptie...don't know why though.

[OUMallen]

why do you hate yourself?


Hyuk hyuk, good one. :rolleyes:

[Tulsa_Fireman]

If I don't see any obvious physicial limitations, I usally assume it is a heart issue, etc. since I have family members in that situation...especially if they are old. Besides, it's not like I have ever challenged or questioned anyone on it.....it is just an observational habit.

Even worse, I think a woman driving an expensive car is more attractive than one driving a hooptie...don't know why though.

heh jihad

[tbl]

I went over 30 years of breathing air on planet earth before I watched "The Sound of Music". Upon watching it, I quickly came to realization that it is the single best movie ever made.

[CK Sooner]

Hyuk hyuk, good one. :rolleyes:

It was.

[soonersis]

I didn't know the song Greased Lightning from Grease was a dirty song until I was 21, even though I have been singing with it since I was 4.

I believe that doctors are the dumbest business people.

My favorite movie right now is Galaxy Quest...I have no idea why.

[tbl]

I didn't know Greased Lightning was a dirty song until I saw the Christopher Walken skit on SNL. To be fair, the movie version was toned down CONSIDERABLY from the original play.

The chicks will what? Cream? That's dirty... How about we use...
Scream?
Shut up.... Fleem. The chicks will fleem. It rhymes. It works.

[StoopTroup]

I hate it that SPEK is gone.

[Tulsa_Fireman]

http://iseeyouwalken.ytmnd.com/

[Taxman71]

I didn't know the song Greased Lightning from Grease was a dirty song until I was 21, even though I have been singing with it since I was 4.

I believe that doctors are the dumbest business people.

My favorite movie right now is Galaxy Quest...I have no idea why.

I, too, did not know Greased lightning was dirty until much later in life despite owning the soundtrack on 8-track, LP, cassette and CD. Heck, my 3 year old sings it in the car. Oddly, I recently saw Grease on Broadway in NYC and they had cleaned up the lyrics...cream = scream, pu**y wagon = dragon wagon, etc.

[OUMallen]

I didn't know the song Greased Lightning from Grease was a dirty song until I was 21, even though I have been singing with it since I was 4.



I still didn't until you guys just told me. Looked up the lyrics and wow. That is fairly dirty! :eek:

[OUMallen]

It was.


I know messageboards aren't the most mature places to interact available, but seriously, are you guys in the same kindergarten class? Go big or go home on the flames. Weak smack does nothing for nobody, especially when you're attempting to smack-talk the intelligence of a person with one of the best home-grown educational pedigrees you're liable to find.


Back to topic!

[mdklatt]

The only overtly dirty thing I remember about Grease was something about "sloppy seconds". But then again, I'm a hetero male so I've only seen the movie once. :D

[Hamhock]

I went over 30 years of breathing air on planet earth before I watched "The Sound of Music". Upon watching it, I quickly came to realization that it is the single best movie ever made.

i bought it for the family to watch on vacation.

the damn dvd was messed up and froze half way into the movie.

i still haven't seen it all.

[mdklatt]

Weak smack does nothing for nobody

Alrighty, I'm game.




especially when you're attempting to smack-talk the intelligence of a person with one of the best home-grown educational pedigrees you're liable to find


You're the lawyer that signed a contract without reading it, right? My own legal edumacation comes from a business law elective in 11th grade and copious viewing of Law & Order (dun dun! TM), and even I know that's a dumb idea. In fact, the only people I imagine that don't know that's a dumb idea are the people that respond to General Prince N'Dngo of Nigeria with his fantastic once-in-a-lifetime get-rich scheme. And you.


How's that? :pop:

[Viking Kitten]

I confess MDK's response is cracking me up. And that there are some people on this board I'd like to see get eaten by lions.

[Harry Beanbag]

I must confess that after reading this thread I think there are even more *******s here than I originally thought.

[GrapevineSooner]

OK, here's mine.

I get very annoyed with the users I support who can't/won't follow simple directions. When it comes to providing support, I adopt the Winston Wolf attitude for dealing with issues.

Which is basically that I think fast, talk fast, and act fast...and I don't like having to repeat basic directions to users that my 5 year old could follow without any problems.

For example, there's a remote assistance tool that we use that requires the user to answer in the affirmative on 2 or 3 prompts before we're remoted in. To prep users for this, I'll tell them to answer in the affirmative when the prompts come up.

Invariably, I'll get about 3 or 4 everyday that will ask 'OK, do I click run here?' on each and every prompt...AFTER I'VE F***ING TOLD THEM TO DO SO ALREADY!!!

I realize I can't make a user do something they either don't want to or incapable of doing. But it still annoys the crap out of me because it's not that hard to follow directions.

Or is it?

[tbl]

In other words, you're Nick Burns... MOVE!!!!
http://isawred.files.wordpress.com/2008/04/nick_burns.jpg

Since spek is gone and this will hopefully soon be forgotten, if I had to choose between listening to "Under Pressure" by Queen or "Ice Ice Baby" by Vanilla Ice from start to finish, I'd choose Ice Ice Baby, probably every time. That song was off the chain when I was coming up...

and I use terms like "off the chain" while in my 30's.

[GottaHavePride]

In other words, you're Nick Burns... MOVE!!!!
http://isawred.files.wordpress.com/2008/04/nick_burns.jpg

Since spek is gone and this will hopefully soon be forgotten, if I had to choose between listening to "Under Pressure" by David Bowie or "Ice Ice Baby" by Vanilla Ice from start to finish, I'd choose Ice Ice Baby, probably every time. That song was off the chain when I was coming up...

and I use terms like "off the chain" while in my 30's.


Fixed.



Why do you hate David Bowie? :mad:

[tbl]

Fixed.



Why do you hate David Bowie? :mad:

Uhhh... sorry... David Bowie offered guest vocals on the Queen album "Hot Space". Look it up, holmes.

http://xafus.com/uploaded/images/publications/28211_1187762607511.jpg

and I love the song, but for some reason Ice Ice Baby is infectious to me. I don't have it downloaded and I do have Under Pressure, but in my head when I hear that riff I always hear "lets kick it".

[GottaHavePride]

Uhhh... sorry... David Bowie offered guest vocals on the Queen album "Hot Space". Look it up, holmes.

http://xafus.com/uploaded/images/publications/28211_1187762607511.jpg

and I love the song, but for some reason Ice Ice Baby is infectious to me. I don't have it downloaded and I do have Under Pressure, but in my head when I hear that riff I always hear "lets kick it".

Heh. Bowie co-wrote the song. Even if it came out on a Queen album, he gets some of the credit. ;)

[tbl]

spek... wait.

[proud gonzo]

I think it's hilarious every time I see someone from high school who has gained weight since then.

[texas bandman]

I'll try to avoid you as I would make you uncomfortable. :D


...the dirty little secrets that make you a horrible person:

For example:
I am a little prejudiced against obese people. And by a little I mean a lot.

I get very uncomfortable around retarded kids. I'm just not kosher with full-bodied hugs from anybody that's not my wife.

I try to stare out of the corner of my eye when I see somebody with a weird deformity. I want to be that guy that looks past that stuff and just sees the person inside. Nyeah, I'm not. I thinking "WTF" just like everybody else.

I want games to be injury-free, but when it's Notre-Dame vs USC, I want it quite a bit less.

I never say "yes" when the checker at the grocery store asks me if I want to donate a buck to some charity or another. I feel like I should just to make the cashier think I'm a good person.

[soonerscuba]

Uhhh... sorry... David Bowie offered guest vocals on the Queen album "Hot Space". Look it up, holmes.

http://xafus.com/uploaded/images/publications/28211_1187762607511.jpg

and I love the song, but for some reason Ice Ice Baby is infectious to me. I don't have it downloaded and I do have Under Pressure, but in my head when I hear that riff I always hear "lets kick it".
With a collaboration between David Bowie and Queen I'm surprised they found time to use their mouths for singing.

[proud gonzo]

I think lack of talent (in terms of profession or chosen field of study) is a huge turn-off. And I don't just mean if, for example, a guy is a writer and he's absolutely horrible at it. I mean if he's a competent writer rather than a really good writer. I'm a talent snob.

[Blue]

I watch Glenn Beck

[12]

A productive nose picking is something I personally enjoy. I don't eat it or even think it is something worthy of flickage.

That said, I can breath better and i am making good use of the napkins stored in my glove box.

[Taxman71]

I secretly like to play 5 rounds of freecell on my cellphone while in the can at work....when I get a 3G phone, I am never going back to my desk.

[OU4LIFE]

I confess MDK's response is cracking me up. And that there are some people on this board I'd like to see get eaten by lions.

IN

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v484/critical_phil/bobbarry.jpg

[Harry Beanbag]

I secretly like to play 5 rounds of freecell on my cellphone while in the can at work....when I get a 3G phone, I am never going back to my desk.


I play backgammon.

[shaun4411]

ive never been to disneyland.

[Echoes]

Promise me you won't tutor anyone needing help with English classes.

Yeah Viking, because making 30 second posts on message boards translate to proof reading papers and helping people with English.

It's funny you say that, because I have tutored in English (specifically, APA style writing) with great results. Maybe you should keep your English observations to yourself ;)

[jage]

Yeah Viking, because making 30 second posts on message boards translate to proof reading papers and helping people with English.

It's funny you say that, because I have tutored in English (specifically, APA style writing) with great results. Maybe you should keep your English observations to yourself ;)

Someone give Echoes a beer...he seems like a stressed out little man.

[CK Sooner]

I like Hawt girls.

:D

[SoonerInKCMO]

Someone give Echoes a beer...he seems like a stressed out little man.

I'd give him one... but I drank all mine. :(

[royalfan5]

I often make people uncomfortable with the darkness of my humor.

[SoonerInKCMO]

Humor? :confused:




;)

[royalfan5]

Humor? :confused:




;)

That's the reaction I usually get. Then I have explain why a Zombie Dad joke is funny.

[Penguin]

With Ike striking tonight, I am completely prepared for cannibalism and necrophilia.


I will provide the Soonerfan community with a tally of victims/lovers when this is over.

[Penguin]

With Ike striking tonight, I am completely prepared for cannibalism and necrophilia.


I will provide the Soonerfan community with a tally of victims/lovers when this is over.


All right! I'll post pictures! Geez!


I've never got so many PM's over one message in my life!

[proud gonzo]

All right! I'll post pictures! Geez!


I've never got so many PM's over one message in my life!
HEH.

[tbl]

I take things that shouldn't be funny and make my wife laugh about them... like my Dads suicide when I was 14. Anytime the word "Dad" or any reference to suicide is brought up, I go overboard accusing her of bringing up my pain and referring to my dad eating a lead salad, eating bullets, etc. I also do this with a chosen few people that are close to me as well and it is extremely unsettling to them. I do it in a way that they have to laugh and then when they do, I make them feel bad for laughing, like they're laughing at my misery.

[Soonrboy]

I take things that shouldn't be funny and make my wife laugh about them... like my Dads suicide when I was 14. Anytime the word "Dad" or any reference to suicide is brought up, I go overboard accusing her of bringing up my pain and referring to my dad eating a lead salad, eating bullets, etc. I also do this with a chosen few people that are close to me as well and it is extremely unsettling to them. I do it in a way that they have to laugh and then when they do, I make them feel bad for laughing, like they're laughing at my misery.

Hey, we are having a watch party at our house tomorrow night. Think you could swing by and entertain us with your whimsies?

[SicEmBaylor]

I always leave my cell phone on in a plane.

[proud gonzo]

I always leave my cell phone on in a plane.
well, it's not like you have to worry about anyone calling you. ;)

[tbl]

I think one of the best love songs in the world is "I'll be there for you" by Bon Jovi.

[Taxman71]

The native american tribal license plates really annoy me......it's like they only make them to pi$$ off the state of Oklahoma and save $20 in tax.

[Crimsontothecore]

I hate it when people refer to it as a "hot water heater"

There is absolutely no need to heat hot water.

[pergdaddy]

People who don't say thank you or you're welcome when you do something nice in public: I would like to follow them through the store incessantly saying "THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU" while staying no further than 2 feet away from them.

People who drive like there are no auto laws: I would seriously like to ram your car off the road into a tree (especially those that speed ridiculously or cut people off trying to get ahead of everybody).

People who drive right through pedestrian crosswalks in front of the Wal-Mart's while my small children and the olden people have to scurry: I seriously wish this was one of those times when I was the real Punisher or Wolverine and I could exact vengeance that would make even the gods blush. Seriously, are you in that much of a god damn hurry that running down small children and crippled olden people doesn't factor into your driving decisions?

People who are racist: I'm not racist, I generally hate parts of every faction of society, not all people of those factions.

Oh, and I'm part polish, french, italian and american. So, I shall now be a polfreita-american. Sounds stupid doesn't it? I've never been to Poland, France or Italy. I'm American. If you have not been to your country of origin, you are not that country of origin. You are American of Italian descent. You are American of African descent.

If you see me scolding my children in public for the way they are acting, mind your own business. Disciplining my children does not make me an abuser. I am stern with them and expect them to listen to me, when they don't they get in trouble. If you roll your eyes at me again, I shall take them directly out of your head, make you gargle them in your mouth, then take them and stick them in a gumball machine. I do not even think twice about other parents discipling their children unless it goes across the line into hitting them hard. that's not cool, you should be waterboarded.

I try not to be a bad person and I truly try to make good decisions. If I make a bad decision or say something you don't like, it's not intentional. Please remember that God did not make me perfect. Life is a constant lesson. I'm still learning.

[pott_2]

I think the "pregnant/expecting/new mother" parking spaces are ridiculous. I don't need to park close because I'm young and in good health so I shouldn't mind who does. But I don't consider pregnancy or parenthood to be a handicap. It's a self-inflicted result of your behavior. NO PARKING SPACE FOR YOU. While I'm busy covering for your a$$ at work for the next 9 years while Junior gets every virus in town or you just don't feel like coming in today so you can go to the store and park near the handicapped folks I won't like you very much. And I won't mind a bit if I decide I want a mental health day or my dog needs to go to the vet. I won't park in your pregnant/nursing Mom spot, but I want to sometimes just out of spite.

I hang out near those spaces waiting to catch a glimpse of a **** to be...






jk

[Crimsontothecore]

People who don't say thank you or you're welcome when you do something nice in public: I would like to follow them through the store incessantly saying "THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU" while staying no further than 2 feet away from them.

People who drive like there are no auto laws: I would seriously like to ram your car off the road into a tree (especially those that speed ridiculously or cut people off trying to get ahead of everybody).

People who drive right through pedestrian crosswalks in front of the Wal-Mart's while my small children and the olden people have to scurry: I seriously wish this was one of those times when I was the real Punisher or Wolverine and I could exact vengeance that would make even the gods blush. Seriously, are you in that much of a god damn hurry that running down small children and crippled olden people doesn't factor into your driving decisions?

People who are racist: I'm not racist, I generally hate parts of every faction of society, not all people of those factions.

Oh, and I'm part polish, french, italian and american. So, I shall now be a polfreita-american. Sounds stupid doesn't it? I've never been to Poland, France or Italy. I'm American. If you have not been to your country of origin, you are not that country of origin. You are American of Italian descent. You are American of African descent.

If you see me scolding my children in public for the way they are acting, mind your own business. Disciplining my children does not make me an abuser. I am stern with them and expect them to listen to me, when they don't they get in trouble. If you roll your eyes at me again, I shall take them directly out of your head, make you gargle them in your mouth, then take them and stick them in a gumball machine. I do not even think twice about other parents discipling their children unless it goes across the line into hitting them hard. that's not cool, you should be waterboarded.

I try not to be a bad person and I truly try to make good decisions. If I make a bad decision or say something you don't like, it's not intentional. Please remember that God did not make me perfect. Life is a constant lesson. I'm still learning.

GOOD HEAVENS! Calm down and go call your therapist.

[SicEmBaylor]

The native american tribal license plates really annoy me......it's like they only make them to pi$$ off the state of Oklahoma and save $20 in tax.

Yep. I completely agree with this. I detest tribal plates.

[tbl]

One time I keyed a guys new car in a crowded parking lot b/c he was taking up two spaces. I still feel bad about this one, even though there were people parking across the street to get in and having to run through the rain. I know he did it intentionally as he had the curb next to one side and he was parked in the middle, eliminating the possibility that there was somebody there previously that forced him into a bad space. Still, this is probably one of the worst things I've done in my adult life. I still await retribution for it...

[Viking Kitten]

One time I keyed a guys new car in a crowded parking lot b/c he was taking up two spaces. I still feel bad about this one, even though there were people parking across the street to get in and having to run through the rain. I know he did it intentionally as he had the curb next to one side and he was parked in the middle, eliminating the possibility that there was somebody there previously that forced him into a bad space. Still, this is probably one of the worst things I've done in my adult life. I still await retribution for it...

Dang. I've been sorely tempted to get revenge on two-space-taker-uppers a couple of times, but I never actually went through with it. I completely share your frustration with people who park that way though. It's just the most rude, selfish thing.

I wonder if the guy you keyed still does it or if he got the message?

[sooneron]

I teared up a bit at the end of In Her Shoes.

[tbl]

Dang. I've been sorely tempted to get revenge on two-space-taker-uppers a couple of times, but I never actually went through with it. I completely share your frustration with people who park that way though. It's just the most rude, selfish thing.

I wonder if the guy you keyed still does it or if he got the message?

I do too, but I doubt it... Like I said, I was running in the rain but I had driven past the car while looking for a parking place and was already pretty peeved. If I had taken the time to write out a note explaining the whole scenario I wouldn't have actually damaged his car, but as I was running through the rain, drenched and mad, I saw his car on my direct path and it just happened. I didn't even break my stride.

Sometimes I'll just leave a note letting them know what inconsiderate jerks they are (I've seriously done this) but this one just kind of happened the way it did. I wish I could take it back but what can you do? I guess admit it on a messageboard and hope that fixes it somehow... ;)

[Viking Kitten]

I do too, but I doubt it... Like I said, I was running in the rain but I had driven past the car while looking for a parking place and was already pretty peeved. If I had taken the time to write out a note explaining the whole scenario I wouldn't have actually damaged his car, but as I was running through the rain, drenched and mad, I saw his car on my direct path and it just happened. I didn't even break my stride.

Sometimes I'll just leave a note letting them know what inconsiderate jerks they are (I've seriously done this) but this one just kind of happened the way it did. I wish I could take it back but what can you do? I guess admit it on a messageboard and hope that fixes it somehow... ;)

I once encountered a similar scenario with a Corvette. I was driving a smallish old clunker, so I actually managed to fit my car into the tiny space left between the curb and the Vette's driver side. Left maybe half an inch for him to open that door. I thought it would be funny if he tried some to jack with my car, given that it was all beat up anyway. In retrospect, I'm lucky I didn't get my tires slashed.

[pergdaddy]

Crimson,

just needed to get it off my chest. I'm fine now. I'm my own therapist. I'm the only who will listen to me contently.

[Hot Rod]

One time I keyed a guys new car in a crowded parking lot b/c he was taking up two spaces. I still feel bad about this one, even though there were people parking across the street to get in and having to run through the rain. I know he did it intentionally as he had the curb next to one side and he was parked in the middle, eliminating the possibility that there was somebody there previously that forced him into a bad space. Still, this is probably one of the worst things I've done in my adult life. I still await retribution for it...

Well, a friend of mine had this happen to him when visiting a small office building. He noticed the double-parked car. He went ahead and drove to the back of the building, walked to the front and when he went inside yelled "OK, who's the moron that thinks he needs two spaces out there?!" A gentleman spoke up saying it was him, and my friend continued on "so, you think you NEED more than one space to park your car?!" He said the guy felt pretty bad about it and he felt good not having to do any damage.

[Position Limit]

when i'm running and i pass by somebody that's fat and slow, i mock them to myself. i want them to find somewhere else to run. i cant figure out why i'm like that. i know it's wrong but i can't help it.

i hate parents that try way to hard. and it usually starts before the kid is born by naming them some madison ave. wannabe catchy name. it usually has some materialistic connotation to it but they are too stupid to realize it.

while i'm on parents, why in hades do resturants have kids menus? chicken nuggets, cheeseburgers and french fries. you came to eat italian food, if little skylar can't handle that leave him at home.

[tbl]

while i'm on parents, why in hades do resturants have kids menus? chicken nuggets, cheeseburgers and french fries. you came to eat italian food, if little skylar can't handle that leave him at home.

If that were the case, my kids would never eat when we went out. My daughter will eat chinese, my son won't. They'll both eat chips and dip, but thats pretty much the limit at Mexican. At Italian, my daughter will eat noodles with no sauce and my son will eat meat sauce but no noodles (I'm not kidding either). I draw the line at certain points, but pickiness reigns for kids, especially those under 5. Plus, you can't rightly give a 3 year old a regular menu and let them color on that, can you?

You'll understand one of these days...

[Hot Rod]

tbl, your kids sounds like mine. One has a preference that the other one doesn't. One of my boys like spaghetti, the other fettucini alfredo. Both eat Mexican well and I still can't get them to eat Chinese. :(

[Hot Rod]

i hate parents that try way to hard. and it usually starts before the kid is born by naming them some madison ave. wannabe catchy name. it usually has some materialistic connotation to it but they are too stupid to realize it.

Yeah, I know what you mean. However, we did like the name Madison for a middle name for our daughter, only to keep hers and my wife's initials the same. It turned out to be a boy, so we went with something else.

[Taxman71]

Many restaurants would go out of business if they didn't have a bland (chicken strips/grilled cheese/corn dog) menu for kids because it wouldn't be worth the money for parents to deal with them. I would just stay home. That said, we get takeout several times a week for the wife and I, eat at our leisure at home while the kids eat their meal of choice.

As for the double-lane parker, that is pure *********gery and should be punished. However, I simply hack a big aggie on their window rather than cause actual damage. Ocassionally, I will put an Obama sticker on their bumper also.

[Position Limit]

hamburgers and hotdogs are for cookouts and baseball games. if the kid can't learn to eat proper at a real resturant, dine at chuck-e-cheese. maybe i just dont understand the need to acquiesce to a childs demand for junkfood.

[Fraggle145]

I make fun of fat people, ugly people, retarded, and stupid people and dont hide it very well.

I'm an arrogant know-it-all that whines till I get my way.

I hate other people's children, especially babies. Shut it up or stay home.

Same with other peoples dogs. Again its your dog take responsibility for it and keep it at home, and dont bitch about having to let the dog out. Oh ya clean up its **** too.

[tbl]

hamburgers and hotdogs are for cookouts and baseball games. if the kid can't learn to eat proper at a real resturant, dine at chuck-e-cheese. maybe i just dont understand the need to acquiesce to a childs demand for junkfood.

Like I said, one of these days (if you have kids) you will understand. Besides I wouldn't call chicken nuggets any more junk food than I would 2 enchilada's with rice and beans or a heaping bowl of fettucini alfredo. Matter of fact, they're more healthy than most of the things you get at a restaurant. French fries... not so much.

[Taxman71]

hamburgers and hotdogs are for cookouts and baseball games. if the kid can't learn to eat proper at a real resturant, dine at chuck-e-cheese. maybe i just dont understand the need to acquiesce to a childs demand for junkfood.

I said the same thing before I had kids. However, reasoning with a child under the age of 4 is futile. Besides, paying for a meal at a restaurant to see if a kid likes a certain food is not the best method. We try out new foods at home to see if they like them first.

That said, I just don't take my kids to certain upscale restaurants b/c I know they won't like it and it would be wasted on them. Instead, I take them to family-friendly places...mexican food, chain restaurants, Boomerang sort of thing.

[tbl]

Dude I've forced food, good food, into my kids gullets and it never works. I shoved a piece of pineapple into my sons mouth the other night and he spit it out. PINEAPPLE!

[Taxman71]

We have always taken our kids with us 90% of the time to restaurants. They learn how to behave in public, use manners, etc. and eventually look forward to it....which lets me eat out more often. To make them eat food they don't want or like at the same time is too much. Once they have restaurant manners, then you start working on their palate.

[tbl]

I always do the force feedings at home. When we go out, they usually split a plate and it's always something we know they'll eat. Going out is no time to experiment...

[Hot Rod]

hamburgers and hotdogs are for cookouts and baseball games. if the kid can't learn to eat proper at a real resturant, dine at chuck-e-cheese. maybe i just dont understand the need to acquiesce to a childs demand for junkfood.

Uh, restaurants DO serve hamburgers as well.

[Hot Rod]

Dude I've forced food, good food, into my kids gullets and it never works. I shoved a piece of pineapple into my sons mouth the other night and he spit it out. PINEAPPLE!

LOL! Like I said, I got one who eats things and the other doesn't care for them. This being an example as well. One of my boys will tear into fruit, even ask for it as a snack, above cookies and brownies. The other one goes for the pastries and doesn't care for fruit, but he's more of the vegetable eater, than my fruit eater. Crazy.

:pop:

[Tulsa_Fireman]

Going out is no time to experiment...

Couldn't agree more.

However, I make it a point to make sure my daughter tries everything she can. When we eat mexican, she eats mexican. When we eat chinese, she eats chinese. Italian, Thai, whatever. That's because early on, she got chicken and french fries but I made her have a bite of whatever it was I was having. That, me never allowing her to be a picky eater from jump, and her getting her daddy's appetite has made for a fairly brave, if not fullblown adventurous girl in regards to different cuisine.

Case in point, we're in Winter Park this past spring break. At a barbecue joint (a horrible one at that) and there's calf fries on the menu. I'm on that like white on rice, so I order us up some and tell my Abigail, "You're gonna try 'em too, baby." She did. They were the worst calf fries I've ever had. And she agreed that they sucked balls (pun intended). But it wasn't an episode of her freaking out about trying something new. I wasn't exactly forthcoming with what it was we ate that day either. But she tried it, WE tried it, and we moved right along.

My nieces and nephews are as picky as you'll find. Drives me absolutely nuts, not because they're whiny lil' turds, but because of the awesome, off the wall things they'll never try because it's not 'chicken and french fries'.