If you were King of America...

[soonerhubs]

...meaning you determined everyone's vote in Congress, the Courts, and, of course, the Oval Office, what would you do to solve the nation's challenges?

Namely: Energy Costs, Stalling Economy, War in Iraq, Relations with Iran, or any other problems you see that I didn't remember.

Here's the suggested criteria to apply to your post.
1) Explain why it would work.
2) Explain why it may not work.
3) Try and back up with research the ideas that support your frame of mind.

Pick an issue and go crazy. :D

[StoopTroup]

Your Instructions have already been given to you....

Pay Attention!

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5356793602610954530 (http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5356793602610954530)

[mdklatt]

3) Try and back up with research the ideas that support your frame of mind.


Out!

I've never wanted to run the country, but give me control of Norman for just one week. Of course, I'll (temporarily) need powers that aren't normally associated with the government.

[pergdaddy]

Mount all out assault on Canada and take over their oil fields. Economy and energy costs are taken care of. We may need to invade Mexico too though.

Have sniper dressed up as an Iranian soldier assasinate someone in Israel. Iran's then taken care of.

War in Iraq? I'd make Barack Ambassador to Iraq. He likes to change things.


This is clearly sarcastic and satirical. No one was harmed in the forming of my riotous thoughts.

[Sooner98]

Out!

I've never wanted to run the country, but give me control of Norman for just one week. Of course, I'll (temporarily) need powers that aren't normally associated with the government.

As King of Norman, you think you could see to it that the construction at 36th and Main gets completed sometime in the next year or so? PLZKTHX

[soonerinabilene]

2 chicks at the same time.

[mdklatt]

As King of Norman, you think you could see to it that the construction at 36th and Main gets completed sometime in the next year or so? PLZKTHX

That has zero effect on me so it's gonna have to be low priority. :D

[soonerhubs]

Finally a thread with practical solutions. ;) Quite simply a government mandate to watch Office Space as a daily routine coupled with the conquering of our buddies up North.

Make it so number one.

[TexasLidig8r]

Pull out of the United Nations and give the UN six (6) months to remove its headquarters from NYC.

Pull out of NATO.

Implement a flat tax rate of ten percent (10%) across the board on anything and everything. No deductions, no exemptions, no exceptions. You make a million on the stock market, you pay $100K. You make $10M on your job annually, you pay $1M. You make $10k at McDonalds, you pay $1k.

Equalize trade restrictions. Japan, you have high tariffs on American goods and food being shipped to Japan.. fine, we will reciprocate in kind.

High school kids, you want your college paid for? Fine. For every year you serve in the military, you will receive an equal number of years paid for by the government for your college education.

Establish two federal courts of appeals to handle nothing but death penalty cases. Establish one supreme court to handle nothing but death penalty case appeals.

Energy companies... you have three years to develop a viable source of alternative fuel for our motor vehicles, electrical and natural gas usage. Want some initial ideas? Go see T. Boone. If you don't accomplish this in three years, that 10% tax rate.. well.. it goes up by 10% per year for every year you drag your feet and don't get this done.

Loans and money to the third world? For at least the next 20 years, go see the people at the UN. You hate us anyway except when you want our cash. We have our own issues to deal with. Don't like it.?. go pound sand.

Social security/welfare? You want money for out of wedlock babies? Tough. You were responsible enough to have sex... be responsible enough to pay the consequences. We will NOT be bailing your *** out.

Militarily, we will NOT intervene in your internal affairs or skirmishes. If United States' interests are impacted by you idiocy, we will. BUT, American companies be advised that in 3 years our dependency on foreign oil will be at an all time low and will be phased out completely. Handle your foreign affairs accordingly since Uncle Sam will NOT be bailing your *** out either.

Iraq, etc. You know our timetable. We will not need your miserable asses in 3 years. You better handle up on your business in this time period and make yourself strong and viable. If and when Iran decides to invade after we are gone.. WE DON'T CARE! We don't need you any longer.

Iran and Saudi Arabia.. you want the MidEast? Fine. take it. We don't need you any longer! Go negotiate with the Europeans. Oh and one more thing Iran... you drop a nuke on someone.. It's your ***! We have more nuc tipped missiles pointed at you then you will ever have in your existence. Don't like it? Tough!

American companies... you have your call centers over with Hadji in India? That happy horsecrap stops NOW. The 10% tax rate means you can employ AMERICANS for these positions instead of some Hindu you're paying 50 cents an hour to answer the phone and mumble some instructions that NO ONE understands. Oh... and Walmart and others who have invested in China and now have their cheap products made there.. bring it back to the United States. 10% tax rate means you can afford to. If you do not divest yourself of these interests within three years, that nice little tax rate goes up 10% a year until you do. Plan accordingly.

The list could go on.. and on.. and on.. :mad:

[pergdaddy]

WOW, how old are you Tex? Over 35?

You're getting my write in as I neither want Bush Lite or Commander Change.

[SoonerInKCMO]

Deer lord... first Lid gets green spek... now people want him to be president. :(

[PhilTLL]

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/93/Elvis_Costello-King_of_America_%28album_cover%29.jpg

[SoonerBorn68]

...not bad for a whorn. ;)

[shaun4411]

id be up for a flat income tax. bam 10%. bam bam. dont like it? bam bam. would have to have a fair VAT for sales tax though. make it something even like 15%. or get rid of income tax as a whole, purge the IRS, and save the govt some money. legalize marijuana on indian reservations. cordone off a square state and put everyone sentenced to life w/out parole in that state and let them live amongst themselves escape from NY style.

if you are caught raping a woman, and you are guilty beyond a reasonable doubt, the family reserves the right to flog you in public.

make a requirement demanding the minimum alcohol content in oklahoma beer to be 6%. (3.2% available only at underage clubs).

any 16 yr old with a gpa below 2.0 will have to either maintain a gpa above 2.0 for one semester, or turn 18 before getting his license. this wouldnt apply to those working 30+ hours per week.

mandatory 2 year enlistement in the military or national service for all able bodied American. (similar to what they do in brazil). you either serve 2 years in the reserves/national guard/border guard after high school, or some sort of national service like peace corps or some other national service of sorts. drinking age lowered to 18 for those in this service.

all high school students must take a foreign language of choice and pass a standardized test upon graduation in order to receive their diploma.

free internet over a series of WANs.

income requirements for families wanting more than one child. marriage counseling for 6 months before being issued a marriage license. likewise, 6 months of marriage counseling before granting a divorce.

abolish the minimum wage and have employers negotiate with employees to determine the wage for their job. if nobody is willing to work for $4/hour, then billy bobs burger palace is gonna have to raise their wages.

if youre an illegal alien caught in the united states, you will pay a visit to that cordoned off state for a month.

give the officials of the 3 branches of government free homes, cars, and govt credit cards to live while in office. freeze all of their personal assets disallowing them from investment or profiteering thus removing a significant amount of incentive for them to be swayed by lobbyists and their damn dirty money money.

make all movie theaters live up to the standard of the warren theater.

all OU games on tv, in full HD.

[soonermix]

i'm going to go after the war in iraq...
send word that many nuclear bombs are on the way... give them about 1 week to evacuate.
bombs go off... no more iraq
problem solved.

[StoopTroup]

Lid has some good stuff in there.

I don't agree with it all.

But I'm a Moderate. :D

[NormanPride]

I would institute Martian law.

[Condescending Sooner]

$1,000.00 tax on someone only making $10,000 a year would never fly. It is a little harsh.

[royalfan5]

I'd try for three chicks at one time.

[TexasLidig8r]

$1,000.00 tax on someone only making $10,000 a year would never fly. It is a little harsh.

Why?

That is just the type of mindset that needs to be changed.

Because a person makes more money they should pay a disproportionate share of taxes? Sure don't see that in the Constitution or Bill of Rights anywhere.

If a person wants to make more than 10K a year... learn another trade.. work a second job.. stay in school.. the opportunities are there.

[Curly Bill]

Not a speed limit, but a speed minimum. If you don't drive the speed minimum you are fair game for us flying dickwheels that like to drive fast...

...and carry guns.

[Curly Bill]

Why?

That is just the type of mindset that needs to be changed.

Because a person makes more money they should pay a disproportionate share of taxes? Sure don't see that in the Constitution or Bill of Rights anywhere.

If a person wants to make more than 10K a year... learn another trade.. work a second job.. stay in school.. the opportunities are there.

Dang it, Lid is making all kinds of sense.

[olevetonahill]

Dang it, Lid is making all kinds of sense.

Well to Be fair to the :texan:
He has been exposed to us for a Number of years .

[Curly Bill]

Well to Be fair to the :texan:
He has been exposed to us for a Number of years .

There ya go, that has to be what it is. ;)

[olevetonahill]

There ya go, that has to be what it is. ;)

The "olevet" Is wise Despite his years .

[Curly Bill]

The "olevet" Is a wise-*** Despite his years .

FIXED ;) :P :D

[olevetonahill]

FIXED ;) :P :D

Well That to :D
Oh and If I was King . Id have daily tryouts for chicks to Join My Harem
Just sayin

[Curly Bill]

Well That to :D
Oh and If I was King . Id have daily tryouts for chicks to Join My Harem
Just sayin

Nice...:D

[olevetonahill]

Nice...:D

You can be one of the Guards Ok ?

[Curly Bill]

You can be one of the Guards Ok ?

Can I have my own little harem on the side?

[Turd_Ferguson]

Can I have my own little harem on the side?Sloppy seconds:confused: Eeeww:D

[Curly Bill]

Sloppy seconds:confused: Eeeww:D

Oh good Gawd no, I mean my own little harem just for me.

[olevetonahill]

Oh good Gawd no, I mean my own little harem just for me.

Well you can Have the Rejects Now are you in ?

[Curly Bill]

Well you can Have the Rejects Now are you in ?

They're still hawt right?

[olevetonahill]

They're still hawt right?

Only Hawt ones are gonna Be Interviewd

[Curly Bill]

Only Hawt ones are gonna Be Interviewd

:D Then count me in!!! :cool:

[olevetonahill]

:D Then count me in!!! :cool:

COOL
Now HEY DOC when Can you fit Curly In for an exam and a Nut cuttin ?

[Turd_Ferguson]

COOL
Now HEY DOC when Can you fit Curly In for an exam and a Nut cuttin ?Hell, just do him like my dad used to our barn cats....stuff him in a boot and break out the razor:eek:

[Curly Bill]

COOL
Now HEY DOC when Can you fit Curly In for an exam and a Nut cuttin ?

:eek: a eunuch? No thanks! I'd rather be a :texan:


...but just barely. ;)

[olevetonahill]

:eek: a eunuch? No thanks! I'd rather be a :texan:


...but just barely. ;)

To late Im King and you done Volunteered
Plus you walked right into that with Both eyes wide open :D

[olevetonahill]

Hell, just do him like my dad used to our barn cats....stuff him in a boot and break out the razor:eek:

I aint touchin his Boys . Doc can do it :eek:

[Curly Bill]

To late Im King and you done Volunteered
Plus you walked right into that with Both eyes wide open :D

I was blinded by the thought of my own little harem. :(

[Curly Bill]

I aint touchin his Boys . Doc can do it :eek:

Yeah but Doc took that hypocritical oath...

...promising to do no harm. :D

[olevetonahill]

I was blinded by the thought of my own little harem. :(

Kinda like One of them Stupid Jihads dudes ?
The ones who think they gonna 72 Virgins ?

[Curly Bill]

Kinda like One of them Stupid Jihads dudes ?
The ones who think they gonna 72 Virgins ?

Yep, I was ready to jihad.

...and I'd settle for less then half of the 72. :P

[olevetonahill]

Yep, I was ready to jihad.

...and I'd settle for less then half of the 72. :P

Hell Id like to Find ONE over 18 :D

[AlbqSooner]

Urine test for anyone seeking government assistance. If I have to whiz in a bottle to keep the job I have to pay the taxes which constitute the money to pay you that assistance you sure ought to have to be tested to qualify to receive it.

[olevetonahill]

Urine test for anyone seeking government assistance. If I have to whiz in a bottle to keep the job I have to pay the taxes which constitute the money to pay you that assistance you sure ought to have to be tested to qualify to receive it.

Plus an IQ test to have Kids
If they are to stupid to work for a Living they are to stupid to Breed !
Just sayin

[Jerk]

Only taxpayers, retired taxpayers, military vets, and the spouses of taxpayers could vote.

Any form of welfare would automatically disqualify.

[def_lazer_fc]

work a second job.. stay in school.. the opportunities are there.

i didn't know a second job was an "opportunity".

[Turd_Ferguson]

i didn't know a second job was an "opportunity".Funny, I alway's thought that any job was an opportunity:confused:

[olevetonahill]

i didn't know a second job was an "opportunity".

Nevar had to work for a Livin have you ?:confused: