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Sooner24
7/2/2008, 10:57 PM
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!



1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports; It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to,
Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball
or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Curly Bill
7/2/2008, 11:01 PM
I like the toilet seat one...I just don't see why they make such a big deal out of that.

...besides that we learned in the military that it's more sanitary to leave it up.

OUbones
7/2/2008, 11:23 PM
Nice..... I alway put the lid to toilet seat down. If I have to lift something so do the women. FYI it has and still does **** off most women I know. :)

tommieharris91
7/2/2008, 11:51 PM
I saw that one like 2 years ago.

yermom
7/2/2008, 11:55 PM
if they don't want us to pee on it, they should put it up ;)

yermom
7/2/2008, 11:56 PM
I saw that one like 10 years ago.

fixed ;)

olevetonahill
7/2/2008, 11:56 PM
fixed ;)

tru dat

Sooner24
7/2/2008, 11:59 PM
fixed ;)

Me too but it's as true today as it was then. :D

olevetonahill
7/3/2008, 12:00 AM
Unless the Man is drinking Beer . the Woman should Raise it the Man lower it !.

Blue
7/3/2008, 12:10 AM
Whens my next jar of ole vet juice showing up in the mail, vet?

1 hitter quitter? Is that it? ;)

olevetonahill
7/3/2008, 12:30 AM
Whens my next jar of ole vet juice showing up in the mail, vet?

1 hitter quitter? Is that it? ;)

you said it was to weak :D

Blue
7/3/2008, 12:31 AM
No, no! Two weeks and I'm expecting more juice... :)

olevetonahill
7/3/2008, 12:33 AM
No, no! Two weeks and I'm expecting more juice... :)

110 proof is all it is !:O

Blue
7/3/2008, 12:34 AM
Oh well. I guess I'll just have to chug it. :rolleyes: ;)

Frozen Sooner
7/3/2008, 12:48 AM
I subscribe to the notion that someone who doesn't want a wet *** should learn to look before they sit down.

Blue
7/3/2008, 12:53 AM
Speak from experience? :D

It's happened to everybody.

Frozen Sooner
7/3/2008, 01:09 AM
:O Yes.

olevetonahill
7/3/2008, 01:19 AM
I was drunk Once , Once I say !
Lifted the lid to pee ( hey Lifted Lid LOL) left it up .
stumbled to bed . Got up all drunky a lil while later . to drunk to stand so I say Ill just sit down , Fell in that bitch !:eek:

Blue
7/3/2008, 01:28 AM
I've peed (ist time caller style) off the edge of my bedroom rug. I guess I thought it was a precipice?:confused:

Gandalf_The_Grey
7/3/2008, 03:09 AM
I would like to see SicEm's Boy Rules ;)

soonerloyal
7/3/2008, 04:47 PM
Here's a song to honor all our guys in this thread:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fj4vLZJhNEk

You're welcome. ;)

Lott's Bandana
7/3/2008, 05:12 PM
Rule: No talking to dude standing at next urinal.

Rule: If you wear sandals, socks must remain in the drawer.

Rule: If dude is checking her out while you're walking together at the mall, consider it a compliment. If he's checking her out at church, melee with the collection plate is acceptable.

Rule: Testicles hanging from your hitch makes everyone completely convinced those balls are yours, and therefore you Sir, are a eunuch.

Rule: Braces OR a belt...not both.

Rule: Hold the door for all women, not just the ones you'd hit.

Rule: Wimmen LOVE live hockey games...try it, you'll see.

Rule: The dump was fun when your Dad took you there...not fun no more.

Rule: On a bumpy flight in teh lavatory is when you really appreciate standing up. Aim well.

Rule: If you are dude/dude in a stadium and there are open seats next to you, figure out a way to quickly open at least one between both of you. You can always move back if the owner shows.

Rule: Farts in church are funny. Farts in an elevator, not so.

goingoneight
7/4/2008, 01:24 AM
I was drunk Once , Once I say !
Lifted the lid to pee ( hey Lifted Lid LOL) left it up .
stumbled to bed . Got up all drunky a lil while later . to drunk to stand so I say Ill just sit down , Fell in that bitch !:eek:

:les:Use teh sink!!!!1111!!!111

olevetonahill
7/4/2008, 05:15 AM
:les:Use teh sink!!!!1111!!!111

I couldnt find it !:O