FREE LEGAL ADVICE!

[M]

From 9 a.m. - 9 p.m. Thursday, May 1, you can call (800) 456-8525 and talk to an Oklahoma lawyer at no charge.

This is the 30th year the Oklahoma Bar Association has offered the service as part of the state and national celebration of Law Day.

Be sure to spread the word to anyone you know who may be interested in taking advantage of this service!

Also, for an interesting discussion on mental health court, tort reform and pet law, be sure to watch the "Ask A Lawyer" TV show on OETA at 7 p.m. Thursday.


http://i58.photobucket.com/albums/g258/DixieChickMissy/LawDayallsm.jpg

[dolemitesooner]

Get out of here with this garbage. Vk used to post this once a year.

If you need legal advice people call daddy dolemite

[OUDoc]

Can we find out where all these lawyers will be in one room just like sitting ducks waiting for someone to nail the doors shut and......was that out loud?

[Viking Kitten]

Tell them about Pet Law, M. Tell them all about those monkeys.

[Animal Mother]

Can we find out where all these lawyers will be in one room just like sitting ducks waiting for someone to nail the doors shut and......was that out loud?

Address:

666 Souless Pig Boulevard

[mdklatt]

From 9 a.m. - 9 p.m. Thursday, May 1, you can call (800) 456-8525 and talk to an Oklahoma lawyer at no charge.


What extension do I dial to get an expert on beastiality laws?

That llama was not there when I went to bed, officer, I swear!

[M]

Tell them about Pet Law, M. Tell them all about those monkeys.


Yes. Tune in to watch a lady play with her wild, unabashed monkeys. SHE LOVES MONKEYS, PEOPLE!!!1

[dolemitesooner]

:confused: :)

[Viking Kitten]

Get out of here with this garbage. Vk used to post this once a year.

If you need legal advice people call daddy dolemite

Dear Daddy Dolemite: I sustained serious injuries during a recent routine high five. How do I go about suing some muhfuggah?

[dolemitesooner]

Dear Daddy Dolemite: I sustained serious injuries during a recent routine high five. How do I go about suing some muhfuggah?
Well first of all I would have to ask "How do you define routine"? For example : Was the person who gave you the High five a 6'2 Gorilla that just got done running 7.6 miles that may or may not have be in the middle of a roid rage. If so that does not sound very routine.

Also most "muhfuggah's" (as you called said person) do not have anything that you could sue them for becuase they are poor beootches.

So you dear writter are legaly ****ed


Next question

[OUDoc]

Yes. Tune in to watch a lady play with her wild, unabashed monkeys. SHE LOVES MONKEYS, PEOPLE!!!1

Doleo plays with his monkey all the time, they just won't let him on TV. WHY?

[M]

Well first of all I would have to ask "How do you define routine"? For example : Was the person who gave you the High five a 6'2 Gorilla that just got done running 7.6 miles that may or may not have be in the middle of a roid rage. If so that does not sound very routine.

Also most "muhfuggah's" (as you called said person) do not have anything that you could sue them for becuase they are poor beootches.

So you dear writter are legaly ****ed


Next question

:les: NEGLIGENT INFLICTION OF EMOTIONAL DISTRESS!!!

[dolemitesooner]

That **** is not even accepted in my jurisdiction.

[dolemitesooner]

Doleo plays with his monkey all the time, they just won't let him on TV. WHY?
You act like there is something wrong with playing with my Monkey.

Monkeys need love too:D

[Viking Kitten]

He keep playing with that monkey and he gonna get disbarred, beyonce.

[dolemitesooner]

Well I will just pay with the consequences when the time comes.

I have tried to convince multiple ladies to Help me out with the feeding and loving of my monkey, but they all wind up quitting on me.

Maybe I am not paying enough.

I will look into this.

[Turd_Ferguson]

I thought Monkey's were ment to be spanked:confused:

[SoonerInKCMO]

Are any of these lawyers hot babes? If so, do they have a direct line I can call?

TIA!

[dolemitesooner]

Are any of these lawyers hot babes? If so, do they have a direct line I can call?

TIA!I knew I liked you for some reason

[M]

Are any of these lawyers hot babes? If so, do they have a direct line I can call?

TIA!

You must be thinking of the Free Barely Legal Advice hotline! ;)

Check your PMs.

[OUDoc]

Check your PMs.

Wait, are some of us getting insider info?

[SoonerInKCMO]

I'm not allowed to say.

[Chuck Bao]

May Day is international labour day, not lawyers' day.

Lawyers never did a day of labour in the history of ever.

I call shiang-haied-annigans.

[StoopTroup]

I got advice from Daddy Doleo and I haven't had trouble with any of my hoes since.

[Turd_Ferguson]

I got advice from Daddy Doleo and I haven't had trouble with any of my hoes since.How do I fix mine:confused:
http://www.theblogpound.com/images/uploads/hoe.jpg

[StoopTroup]

First you have to quit abusing your hoes.

[dolemitesooner]

First you have to quit abusing your hoes.

Yeah no ****. :D

[OUDoc]

First you have to quit abusing your hoes.

And his hose.

[Okla-homey]

pets in your will? pfft. In no jurisdiction in America can you leave money to your pet.

What you can do is establish a trust for the benefit of a person you believe will take care of Fluffy and empower the trustee to cut off the bucks if that person doesn't do so.:D

what do I win Bob?

Tort reform? Don't get me started. I ask ya, why are we comfortable with a jury of twelve deciding if an accused lives or dies, or spends life in Big Mac among the sodomites, but we get all icky at the notion those same twelve are incapable of fairly deciding if some evile tortfeasor, or more likely his insurance company, has to get up off their danged wallet and pay some money?

Don't be fooled folks. Tort Reform is a thinly disguised attempt by big business to minimize their risk exposure when they screw up. Nothing more. Nothing less. In fact, suing the bastages and the accompanying spectre of punitive damages is the only weapon in the little guy's arsenal.

[StoopTroup]

Tort reform? Don't get me started. I ask ya, why are we comfortable with a jury of twelve deciding if an accused lives or dies, or spends life in Big Mac among the sodomites, but we get all icky at the notion those same twelve are incapable of fairly deciding if some evile tortfeasor, or more likely his insurance company, has to get up off their danged wallet and pay some money?

Folks who haven't read John Grisham's Novel "An Innocent Man" should IMHO.

Especially if your from Oklahoma.

I am against the death penalty even though I know there are many folks who deserved the sentence. However, the life of Ron Williamson and Dennis Fritz, as well as some of the others mentioned in Grisham's account of what happened, should be something everybody should know about especially if you ever are called on for Jury Duty.

I do feel there are many folks who don't deserve their freedom due to their acts as free men and women. I do think some folks don't get the best representation when their future could be affected forever.

Victims don't get much either.

It's all a pretty awful situation IMO.

To those of you who make an honorable living doing this, you have my respect as part of making it better.

[TUSooner]

FREE LEGAL ADVICE?
I'm sure it'll be worth every penny!

[soonerboomer93]

well, you do get what you pay for

:D

[Viking Kitten]

Well ummm... actually, the lawyer volunteers (my mom being one of them) actually take the calls very seriously and really try their best to help people.

ARE YOU TRYING TO INSULT MY MOM, TU??? ;)

[olevetonahill]

Well ummm... actually, the lawyer volunteers (my mom being one of them) actually take the calls very seriously and really try their best to help people.

ARE YOU TRYING TO INSULT MY MOM, TU??? ;)

Is she Hawt ?

[soonerboomer93]

can you have secks on her?

[olevetonahill]

can you have secks in her?

:eek:

[TUSooner]

Well ummm... actually, the lawyer volunteers (my mom being one of them) actually take the calls very seriously and really try their best to help people.

ARE YOU TRYING TO INSULT MY MOM, TU??? ;)

Never in life, my Dear! :)
That's just my favorite disclaimer when people ask me legal questions.
If I know anything about someone's legal problems, they're either in prison or on the way. :rolleyes:

[Okla-homey]

Never in life, my Dear! :)
That's just my favorite disclaimer when people ask me legal questions.
If I know anything about someone's legal problems, they're either in prison or on the way. :rolleyes:


...and have you ever noticed, people generally don't talk to a lawyer until after they've screwed up? Then, they have the gall to blame the lawyer, a mere handmaiden of the Law, if they lo$e?

I wonder how many legal troubles and entanglements might be avoided if people merely spent a couple hunnert bucks up front to learn the appropriate and legal course of action on their facts and circumstances versus plowing ahead and when the wheels inevitably fall off, paying thousands to put it all back together?

Kinda like those old muffler shop commercials. "Call me now, or call me later."

[soonerboomer93]

of course, the appropriate course of action could be entirely different from the legal one

[Okla-homey]

of course, the appropriate course of action could be entirely different from the legal one

The Prime Directive: OBEY THE LAW!

all other forms of legal advice are simply variations on that theme.;)

[SoonerInKCMO]

The Prime Directive: OBEY THE LAW!

Except for traffic laws. Right, Mr. Speedy McSpeederson? ;)

[Okla-homey]

Except for traffic laws. Right, Mr. Speedy McSpeederson? ;)

OBEY THE LAW OR PREPARE TO SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES. BUT, OBEY THE LAW. OBEY.

[soonerboomer93]

which law?

the law of man?

the law of nature?

the law of whichever diety (or dieties) one may choose to believe in?

[Frozen Sooner]

pets in your will? pfft. In no jurisdiction in America can you leave money to your pet.

What you can do is establish a trust for the benefit of a person you believe will take care of Fluffy and empower the trustee to cut off the bucks if that person doesn't do so.:D

what do I win Bob?

Tort reform? Don't get me started. I ask ya, why are we comfortable with a jury of twelve deciding if an accused lives or dies, or spends life in Big Mac among the sodomites, but we get all icky at the notion those same twelve are incapable of fairly deciding if some evile tortfeasor, or more likely his insurance company, has to get up off their danged wallet and pay some money?

Don't be fooled folks. Tort Reform is a thinly disguised attempt by big business to minimize their risk exposure when they screw up. Nothing more. Nothing less. In fact, suing the bastages and the accompanying spectre of punitive damages is the only weapon in the little guy's arsenal.

Heh.

You're against tort reform.

You're against the death penalty.

I've said it before, I'll say it again: you're a very short drive from signing up for ATLA and making contributions to the ACLU. :D

[Okla-homey]

Heh.

You're against tort reform.

You're against the death penalty.

I've said it before, I'll say it again: you're a very short drive from signing up for ATLA and making contributions to the ACLU. :D

Naw. See, I'm pro-life generally, thus I'm anti-death penalty and anti-abortion. I also don't get my drawers in a twist over religion or religious symbols being involved somewhat in goverment because I think the Establishment clause simply means the government cannot fund one religious group to the exclusion of any other. I also happen to think its just fine to indefinitely incarcerate foreigners captured on the battlefield who had taken up arms against the United States...and I'm an elephant. Those things would disqualify me.;)

[Frozen Sooner]

Oh, I know. But sooner or later you'll figure out how wrong you are on the other issues. ;)

[M]

Hello, South Oval!

Did anyone on here call the Ask A Lawyer number last year? We're starting promotion on this year's event, and I'm looking for someone who has called the hotline, found the service beneficial and wouldn't mind sharing their story with the media. If you can help out, e-mail me at [email protected] since I may not see a message on here. Thanks!

[dolemitesooner]

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Viking Kitten]

"[email protected]." "Brow me?" Okay Alex. For $500... what did the p**sed off Philipino transvestite hooker say to Dolemite?

[Czar Soonerov]

http://img14.imageshack.us/img14/4493/bushbrownie7256770.jpg (http://img14.imageshack.us/my.php?image=bushbrownie7256770.jpg)

[Okla-homey]

Can we find out where all these lawyers will be in one room just like sitting ducks waiting for someone to nail the doors shut and......was that out loud?

Herr Doktor,

I'll have you know that while your professional ancestors were putting leeches on George Washington to bleed him and also performing surgery on folks with dirty scalpels, my professional ancestors were writing the Declaration of Independence and United States Constitution. ;)