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Turd_Ferguson
4/21/2008, 09:01 PM
A good friend emailed this to me today...


THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. Anti-constitutionalistically
3. Passive-aggressive disorder
4. Transubstantiate

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. No thanks, I'm married.
2. Nope, no more booze for me!
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Taco Bell ? No thanks, I'm not hungry.
5. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?
6. Oh, I couldn't! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke.
7. I'm not interested in fighting you.
8. Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance, I have no coordination. I'd hate to look like a fool!
9. Where is the nearest bathroom? I refuse to pee in this parking lot or on the side of the road.
10. I must be going home now, as I have to work in the morning.

SoonerStormchaser
4/21/2008, 09:10 PM
She sells seashells down by the seashore.

Jerk
4/21/2008, 09:15 PM
"That girl said she wants to sleep with me, but I think she's too ugly!"

LoyalFan
4/22/2008, 05:04 PM
And....

Antidisestablishmentarianism
"Rubber Baby Buggy Bumper" (X3 and fast!)
"Toy Boat" (X3, etc.)

When drunk, you should never address an cop as "Officer Krupke" or "Officer Clancy". Nor should you say "Nice cruiser! May I drive it?" OR "Wanna race?"
And, "Lookie, let's go have some nice doughnuts. I'll buy and we'll laugh about this unfortunate incident." nevAr works.

XingTheRubicon
4/22/2008, 07:24 PM
That seems dangerous, let's slow down.


(applicable to several different scenarios)

StoopTroup
4/22/2008, 08:03 PM
indicative

SoonerTerry
4/23/2008, 07:13 AM
From the "Pass Out" game.

Mosos suposes his toes are roses,
But Moses suposes eroneously,
For nobodys toes are poises of roses,
as Moses suposes his toes to be.

SoonerTerry
4/23/2008, 07:14 AM
Or

A skunk sat on a stump
The stump thunk the skunk stunk
the skunk thunk the stump stunk.

Hard to say sober.