To all of my Democrat friends

[Jerk]

http://www.ar15.com/images/pixels/clear.gif
To All My Democrat Friends:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, sex-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2008, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures (including the Aztec calendar) whose contributions to society have helped make America great.

Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. Also, this wish is made without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the wishee.


To All My Republican Friends:

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

[VeeJay]

Gettin' ready for umoja over at my place. ;)

[SanJoaquinSooner]

Happy Holidays to you too!!

[OklahomaTuba]

You need a nice picture for the cover of your card to the donks Jerk.

I recommend this one:

http://images.jupiterimages.com/common/detail/43/83/23278343.jpg

[Chuck Bao]

I received that email last week and replied to my friend:

To my Republican friend:

I want to wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. I really do. I know it is terribly difficult for you at the moment as your year-end bonus isn’t quite what you’d been expecting. It’s tough, I know. I agree with you about the promise of the American dream, but I’m not so sure about blaming your shortfalls on the lazy and poor and stupid or those with a funny accent or a funny way of life (your words, not mine).

I also know how hard it is to accept that you sunk your entire life savings went into your two-storey dream home in the suburbs and that you may soon lose that. Rest assured that your boss and fellow Republican is thinking of you while he is vacationing in Bali over Christmas with his year-end bonus. Of course, he is a smart man and deserves every penny of his millions for relocating jobs to China and India. And, if he is thinking of you and his redundancy list, I’m almost sure that he wouldn’t fire people just before Christmas. After all, we are in the seventh year of a Republican administration and trickle down economics must mean more than trickle out to low-labor cost countries and exclusive holiday destinations. Besides, there are plenty of jobs in food services or retail shopping industries. Keep the faith.

I know you are challenged by this whole global warming thing, especially with Al Gore getting so much publicity, but I must say that it is a bit tiring that you email me every time there is a cool weather in your area. Please. And, for the evolution and intelligent design debate, just let it go. Nobody cares.

And, I agree with your derision of the PC crowd, but nanny state politics and a new Bill of Wrongs may be just as bad, or probably much, much worse. Let people alone in their bedrooms and on the internet. Spying on Americans without a judge order is too time consuming? I can see that. Surely the massive computer filtering programs don’t need judges to decide whether it is a national security threat or just personal stuff. Our computers are so smart that they can decode an email with just simple word substitution? After all, security means making us feel safe. Building files on people is just a side benefit, right?

I do want to wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. I really do.

And, for my Democratic friends:

Heh! This is a joke email. Have fun and send to your friends. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

[TopDaugIn2000]

Chuck Bao---

Spek x 100000000000000 to you.

[RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!]

I received that email last week and replied to my friend:

To my Republican friend:

I want to wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. I really do. I know it is terribly difficult for you at the moment as your year-end bonus isn’t quite what you’d been expecting. It’s tough, I know. I agree with you about the promise of the American dream, but I’m not so sure about blaming your shortfalls on the lazy and poor and stupid or those with a funny accent or a funny way of life (your words, not mine).

I also know how hard it is to accept that you sunk your entire life savings went into your two-storey dream home in the suburbs and that you may soon lose that. Rest assured that your boss and fellow Republican is thinking of you while he is vacationing in Bali over Christmas with his year-end bonus. Of course, he is a smart man and deserves every penny of his millions for relocating jobs to China and India. And, if he is thinking of you and his redundancy list, I’m almost sure that he wouldn’t fire people just before Christmas. After all, we are in the seventh year of a Republican administration and trickle down economics must mean more than trickle out to low-labor cost countries and exclusive holiday destinations. Besides, there are plenty of jobs in food services or retail shopping industries. Keep the faith.

I know you are challenged by this whole global warming thing, especially with Al Gore getting so much publicity, but I must say that it is a bit tiring that you email me every time there is a cool weather in your area. Please. And, for the evolution and intelligent design debate, just let it go. Nobody cares.

And, I agree with your derision of the PC crowd, but nanny state politics and a new Bill of Wrongs may be just as bad, or probably much, much worse. Let people alone in their bedrooms and on the internet. Spying on Americans without a judge order is too time consuming? I can see that. Surely the massive computer filtering programs don’t need judges to decide whether it is a national security threat or just personal stuff. Our computers are so smart that they can decode an email with just simple word substitution? After all, security means making us feel safe. Building files on people is just a side benefit, right?

I do want to wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. I really do.

And, for my Democratic friends:

Heh! This is a joke email. Have fun and send to your friends. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.Life is bitter in a democrat's view of the world, eh? Is it any wonder why I have re-registered as a dem!!!

[crawfish]

http://www.bugbash.net/strips/bug-bash20071203.gif

[limey_sooner]

Merry Christmas to you too. Now why don't we all, democrat and republican alike, go out there and shop shop shop to celebrate the birth of our savior.

[soonerloyal]

What I particularly enjoy are the jabs at a supposed lack of Democrat morals. Especially when it's coming out of the mouths of Republican politicians on their third or fourth young wife, or getting caught engaging in same-gender sex - which they repeatedly scream is immoral. Or as they continually flip off our Constitution under the false pretense of keeping us "safe". So much for my soon-to-be-former party's lock on moral superiority.

I dunno about you, but I just love this season. *sigh*

P.S. The best research indicates that Jesus of Nazareth was born around the middle of September, not December 25th. And frankly, I think we're ALL pretty much in for a surprise when we "get to the other side". He's bigger and better than we realize. And we're all pretty imperfect.

[mdklatt]

Has WAR ON CHRISTMAS officially been declared yet??

Before anybody starts bitching because somebody wished them "happy holidays" instead of "merry Christmas", please note: As per the OFFICIAL South Oval ruling, you do not get to decide if you are offended by something. The determination of offense is solely up to the person allegedly doing the offending. If s/he did not mean to offend you, you are not allowed to be offended (refer to all Don Imus threads for ruling precedent).

[Mongo]

I am offended that I can't be offended unless the person meant to offend me

[Rhino]

I'm sorry I hadn't seen this until now.

I've been too busy taking Christ out of Christmas.

[Stoop Dawg]

Merry Christmas to you too. Now why don't we all, democrat and republican alike, go out there and shop shop shop to celebrate the birth of our savior.

Don't forget to decorate the tree and sit on Santa's lap. The birth of Jesus Christ just wouldn't be honored if you skip those traditions.

[Czar Soonerov]

http://img87.imageshack.us/img87/1294/wtf1qa8.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

[RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!]

http://img87.imageshack.us/img87/1294/wtf1qa8.jpg (http://imageshack.us)Y'all guys keep acting like the pres is running for office of some kind.(and you don't like it)

[SoonerBorn68]

I'm sorry I hadn't seen this until now.

I've been too busy taking Christ out of Christmas.



HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

:rolleyes:

[47straight]

P.S. The best research indicates that Jesus of Nazareth was born around the middle of September, not December 25th.


So that means you'll be at work on December 25th?

[XingTheRubicon]

Actually Christmas is derived from Christ Mass. Ask Constantine, he did it, not me.


As the first Christian Emperor, he was thought to have stolen a few traditions from an ancient Persian Zoroastrian faith.

A thousand years before Christ, (not Constantine, 320? AD) Zoroastrians had a God, (Ahura Mazda) and a Devil (Angra Mainyu) and their God sent his son to Earth. His birthday was December 25th. He was unjustly killed by evil naysayers and he arose a few days later. His resurrection was celebrated very similar to how Easter is celebrated now.




I told my Pastor about this charming bit of documented history while we were golfing this summer. I was curious if he had stumbled upon it in his studies at OBU preacher school. He said he remembered a little about it, but he dismissed it due to not being a complete heathen.

We both nervously laughed.

Then he said, your faith is in question. If you get on the green in reg on this hole, your going to Heaven. It was a par 5. I had about 2 birdie putts out of 11 holes so I felt he may have been rooting against me.

I took out my 1 wood and hit a pretty damn good drive. Then a 4 iron to 90 yards out, middle of the fairway. My sand wedge never fails me. A full SW for me is 110, so I took something off. I struck it just right and it was headed right at the pin, maybe a little long. We walked up and there was my ball on the fringe, about 2 1/2 feet from the green.

I looked at him. He looked at me.

Well, I'm putting for birdie, I said. It's not on the green, but it is on the fringe and I'm still putting for birdie.


<long pause>


and he says


Yeah, you're going straight to hell.

[Jerk]

I have read the Romans turned the winter solstice into Christmas as a way of bringing the pagans who worshiped the sun into Christianity. The ancient Romans put a lot of pagan things into the Christian religion that were previously not there, like Plato's 'immortal soul.' Look up the words 'immortal' and 'immortality' on a digital Bible and see what you get. You'll learn exactly who is immortal and who is not. 'Easter' is another one. Resurrection Day should not be named after a pagan holiday.

[Stoop Dawg]

So that means you'll be at work on December 25th?

I'm guessing he'll be with his family, celebrating the incorrect birth date of a man who may or may not be the Son of God by opening gifts supposedly delivered by a gray-haired, portly fellow in a red jump-suit next to a nicely decorated Fir tree.

But don't confuse this scenario with something so offensive as the phrase "Happy Holidays". That phrase takes Christ out of Christmas.

[soonerloyal]

I'm guessing he'll be with his family, celebrating the incorrect birth date of a man who may or may not be the Son of God by opening gifts supposedly delivered by a gray-haired, portly fellow in a red jump-suit next to a nicely decorated Fir tree.

But don't confuse this scenario with something so offensive as the phrase "Happy Holidays". That phrase takes Christ out of Christmas.

Naw. She'll be working from home, like any other day her family's not all together. We'll celebrate yet another corporate holiday/Christmas as soon as the about-to-be-redeployed son gets to come for a visit next month. And it's a nicely-decorated Saratoga Spruce.

The only "holidays" I really hate to work on are Veteran's Day & Memorial Day. I prefer to spend those visiting appropriate persons and places.

I'm just a quiet Christian who doesn't buy into things just because somebody tells me I should.

Merry Christmas, y'all!

[Fraggle145]

This is the one I got in response to jerk's original


"Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an Economic prosperity at the expense of the middle class , socially responsible purchases of Gas guzzling luxury Cars, low-stress golden parachutes, non-addictive overpriced prescribed medication, gay free-neutral celebration of Christmas, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of television evangelist, or secular practices of their choice, with respect for the religious/snake oil persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice acceptance torture traditions et all. We also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2008, but not without due respect for the fear of their choice of other whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. And without regard to the wealth, which golf course, color of the luxury car, looks or physical ability. By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to presidential approval. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for himself or no others, and is void where prohibited by CBN and is revocable at the sole discretion of the president. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of fear of terrorists for a period of one year or until the issuance of a pre-attack on countries with WMDs, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this missiles or of a new contracts at the sole discretion of the desider."

[SoonerGirl06]

All I'm gonna say is "Merry Christmas!"

Ya'll can analyze the crap out of that all you want while I'm enjoying the holiday with my family and friends.

[soonerloyal]

All I'm gonna say is "Merry Christmas!"

Ya'll can analyze the crap out of that all you want while I'm enjoying the holiday with my family and friends.


Spoilsport. ;)

[TopDaugIn2000]

Hey Chuck Bao---

I just used your reply, hope you don't mind!!!!

[badger]

http://www.ar15.com/images/pixels/clear.gif
To All My Democrat Friends:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, sex-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2008, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures (including the Aztec calendar) whose contributions to society have helped make America great.

Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. Also, this wish is made without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the wishee.


To All My Republican Friends:

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
And if you're in California, the Democrats have a... politically correct gift for this winter seasonal greetings event of a holiday:
$14 billion projected deficit!

A very merry HA HA to all you working class fools who pay taxes when those who get us elected pay none into the system!

[Jerk]

And if you're in California, the Democrats have a... politically correct gift for this winter seasonal greetings event of a holiday:
$14 billion projected deficit!

A very merry HA HA to all you working class fools who pay taxes when those who get us elected pay none into the system!
After they destroy that state, the same people who voted for the dumba.ss politicians who did it will flee to other states, like,oh, Arizona, Colorado, Utah, Idaho, et al, where things are still "good." Then, not learning from their previous mistakes, they'll vote for the same kind of welfare, big-state, politician who f*cked up the place where they are from so they can begin to f*ck up the place where they are now.

I call them 'mudbirds.'

[RUSH LIMBAUGH is my clone!]

After they destroy that state, the same people who voted for the dumba.ss politicians who did it will flee to other states, like,oh, Arizona, Colorado, Utah, Idaho, et al, where things are still "good." Then, not learning from their previous mistakes, they'll vote for the same kind of welfare, big-state, politician who f*cked up the place where they are from so they can begin to f*ck up the place where they are now.

I call them 'mudbirds.'We don't have to wait that long. Multitudes have already moved over from CA, bringing their socialism and politically correct thinking with them, and AZ is now "on the fence", politically.